#232 – Bundaberg Rum

20 06 2011

You will often hear the bogan speaking of the “Aussie spirit”, a term the bogan uses to fence in the broad traits of Australians that are also shared by countless other peoples around the world. If a bogan’s car runs out of petrol 3km from the nearest petrol station, it is the Aussie spirit that propels the bogan’s feet up the long and lonesome suburban road, when people of any other nationality would have surely perished somewhere between the McDonald’s and the Woolworths along the way. But to get to the true heart of the Aussie spirit, we must look elsewhere.

First made in central Queensland in 1888, Bundaberg Rum is the only domestically produced spirit recognised by the bogan. The bogan’s grandfather’s sexual and pugilistic conquests were fuelled by Bundaberg’s eponymous liquor, as were the bogan’s father’s, and now it is the turn of the modern bogan to do much the same. The mix of sugar cane and sugar allows the bogan to energise and intoxicate itself to maxtreme heights. Indeed, the world is so much better to the bogan when it has a belly full of Bundy, that the bogan will fight against anything that isn’t Bundy. These things include, but are not limited to, street signs, bouncers, windows, modesty, logic, and other people who are also drinking Bundy. Moreover, when the makers of Bundy Rum realised the energy requirements of its drinkers, they began manufacturing their own cola to add to their own rum, in a specially formulated bogan-fuelling concoction that is universally known as bundy and coke. The bogan cannot conceive of a situation where it would now drink bundy without the added energy of bundy coke.

In addition to sponsoring bogan-approved things as the Wallabies, the Waratahs (aka the ‘Tahs for all those north of the Murray) and of course a five-year deal to be the ‘Official Spirit of the NRL’, the Bundaberg Distilling Company uses a digitally animated, human-sized polar bear to induce the bogan to drunk rum. The Bundy Bear is depicted as being on-site at all crucial moments of the bogan’s life, providing advice or assistance to enable the bogan to be acutely bogan. These crucial moments include buying rum, and observing other bogans attempting to get laid. As the first polar bear to have spent sufficient time around bogans to acquire a drawling Australian accent, the bear has been informally elevated by bogans to national emblem status, frequently adorning boganic residences and/or vehicles.

But there’s more, because Bundaberg Distilling Company really understands the bogan. Ten times in the past 15 years, the bogan has been presented with a golden opportunity. No, it’s not the chance to get 483 months interest-free from Harvey Norman, it’s even better. Yep, as most recently happened in December 2010, “Bundaberg Black” rum was offered in LIMITED EDITION 10 year old vintage. With only 12,000 bottles available, a boganic panic reverberated around the nation. Not even the $150 price tag was enough to deter bogans from swooping – bogans began queuing at the distillery door at lunchtime on Saturday for the Monday launch – rivalling even the most dismal George Lucas and Steve Jobs tragics.

Fresh from this success, Bundaberg plans to take things even further, to even more maxesque bogan heights. Super limited edition, super premium Queensland rum is in the pipeline, which will require thousands of the bogan’s dollars. Even bogan families need heirlooms.


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170 responses

20 06 2011
JimC

Nothing fuels a good cunt-glassing like a few litres of Bundy and Coke in the guts.

20 06 2011
Mick

Funnily enough, Bundy and Diet Coke evokes the same response.

20 06 2011
Robbie

LOL!! Bundy and diet coke…for the weight conscious bogue-ette

20 06 2011
Mick

It’s not just the femmebogues…

20 06 2011
AlyssaKT

When I was a bartender I served a lot of Bundy and Diet Cokes. It was 50/50 male to female ratio; Mick is right.

Often the men would explain their choice (unpromted) was because they were diabetic. Oh, of course!

20 06 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms, Constant source of Randomness

As a younger man living in Northern WA I consumed shedloads of Bundy. I am one of the most passive people you would meet but even I occasionally felt the need to punch on when fuelled by Bundy.

Also the sophisticates drink it with Dry Ginger. Or rool coke, never post mix.

20 06 2011
lolplates

In my school and Uni days I would just skull it out of the bottle…then refere to the guys mixing it with soft drink as ‘pooftas and shoft cwockssh’.

15 02 2012
Lord Boofhead

I like it with ginger beer. Its called a dark and stormy.

20 06 2011
Stephen

Excellent!

20 06 2011
moar caek

bogans like sweet things.
I ran a bar in FNQ in the deep dark past. Top seller was a Bundy & Coke. Second top seller was a Double Bundy and Coke.
“If you don’t fight on rum, you’re a coward.”
Bogan

20 06 2011
Mick

“Make a chicken fight an emu.”

20 06 2011
James Hunter

Interesting sideline about Bundy.
The leftover yeast/sedament from the fermentation is what the original vegemite was and presumably still is,made from.
So every time a bogan swills Bundy he is also supporting the American Kraft company make profits from industrial waste !!!

20 06 2011
Mick

If you ask me, Bundy is industrial waste. I’ve been called a softcock for the last 30 years because I won’t drink the swill.

$150 bucks for a bottle of Bundy? Bugger me…I wonder if I piss in a bottle and put a bear on it whether I could sell it for a lazy $100?

20 06 2011
p'bee

as long as that piss is aged a couple of years.

20 06 2011
AlyssaKT

That’s beer, JH (that Vegemite was originally made from)

20 06 2011
James Hunter

AlyssaKT
Sorry you are right ,however the black concentrate has filled may semi loads from Bundaberg heading south to Kraft since way back in the 50/60 at least.. Did not look or smell like vegemite, more looked like road tar and smelt a bit like molassas. I was not game to taste it though !

20 06 2011
Vviv2

It smelt like molasses James because bundy is made from it & they transport the concentrate this way. (I’ve done the tour…. What can I say,I like the stuff!)

According to the tour guide, bundy black was withdrawn from sale anywhere except the factory itself because unscrupulous retail outlets were upping the price well beyond the recommended retail, once they realised how popular it was….

20 06 2011
Vviv2

Incidentaly, there’s no sugar left in bundy, the distillation process uses it all….. mixed with zero calorie cola, so even diabetics can be bogans! :=P

20 06 2011
.. reformed beauganne ..

Vegemite is indeed made from brewers yeast, but brewers yeast is used in the manufacturing process of beer, not rum ..

20 06 2011
Peter Thornton

Oh, James Hunter, I assumed even you could not be so obviously misinformed enough to roll out that old chestnut, but no…You are. I also assume you’ve been drinking the sediment from the bottom of the seement pond aka the Lower Dogpatch water supply.

20 06 2011
John Band

And like all true Aussie icons, it’s owned by an overseas company…

20 06 2011
Gage Rossiter

A succession of marketing spin doctors has fooled you all. Bundaberg Rum was first released as a branded product in the 1960’s. This was when the Polar Bear logo, designed by Billy McMahon’s Brother, was first used. Rum produced from the Bundaberg distillery prior to this was exclusively sold to distributors, who often blended it with other ingredients, who bottled and sold it under their own label. Of the 83 rums I have tasted_ Bundaberg is the worst.

20 06 2011
lolplates

I quite like rum, but this song sums bundy up!

Seems as Americans daemon seemen too!

20 06 2011
uleh

not a word of a lie — i once saw a ‘southern cross’ tattoo with the bundy rum logo in the middle. granted, it was on an uber-butch, security-wench type of sheila, but the boganic maxtremity was too much for me to ‘bear’…

20 06 2011
Paddy

Affectionately known as rapejuice round these parts. Pissed on Rum is a catchall legal defense for the livlier bogan. It is a cunt of a drink.

20 06 2011
Ash - Glassin' Carnts Who Touch Me Bundy

I don’t mind Bundy (although I prefer straight Bacardi when we’re talking rum), but oh boy. Is it a bogan drink.

I’ve been away all weekend at best mate’s wedding. Unfortunately, due to financial reasons it wasn’t as excessively bogan as one would have hoped. But everyone still got pissed afterwards and there was plenty of boot-knocking.

20 06 2011
Ash - Glassin' Carnts Who Touch Me Bundy

And yes, there was Bundy at the reception. But since they also had plenty of my other favoured poisons (specifically, Messers Smirnoff and Jameson) I didn’t have any.

20 06 2011
urbanreverie

Hi Ash, can you please e-mail me? My email address is my TBL nickname AT rocketmail DOT com. There’s just something I need to ask permission for … Thanks heaps!

21 06 2011
AlyssaKT

intriguing!

20 06 2011
Jim

I toured the distillery in 2006 and questioned them as to why they have a Polar Bear as a mascot for a North Queensland rum. Doesn’t make sense to me. They claimed that it is aimed at the colder parts of Australia to drive the cold chill away. What a wank!
How many bogan’s know that Bundy is owned by Diageo, an English company?

20 06 2011
AFR

I knew it was only a matter of time before you covered my favourite drink… bugger.

20 06 2011
Mick

Don’t be upset, we all have our dirty little secrets.

20 06 2011
Jason

Plus the distillery stinks like shit. I spent my teen years in Bundaberg (a bogan shithole if ever there was one) and there’s a whole of town that shares the unique bogue-roma of the Bundy distillery.

20 06 2011
shakPower

agreed, its does taste like overpriced stale piss but i quite like the bundy adverts , a refreshing change from the usual adverts which involve an old dude yelling his lungs out (or just a loud voice in some cases) about how he’s gone insane and selling everything at crazy prices!

20 06 2011
Blueballs

With every passing week Im becoming to realise that perhaps I really am a bogan…. Today was the final nail in the coffin.

20 06 2011
the beef

back in my on-campus days at uni a mate of mine – usually a nice passive bloke – used to take on the persona of “bogan fury” as a piss-take after downing the angry juice. His nemesis was anyone drinking beam cans, or those whose views were generally in contrast to his. Needless to say, he was much-loved.
Nb; His views were generally in agreement with the previous 231 TBL posts.

20 06 2011
Shirley M.

Ahhh the FNQ cocktail.

23 06 2011
Pete Bondurant

As a proud son of Cairns (now living in the homo enclave of Melbourne) – Bundaberg is most deffo not FNQ. Not even NQ. Jeez that fucken boils my piss – I wanna glass some cunt now.

23 06 2011
Mick

No such thing as a proud son of Cairns.

Unless you were born at Cairns Base…then I will excuse you.

20 06 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms, Constant source of Randomness

Can you still get OP Bundy? That sh*t would get Ghandi glassin carnts.

20 06 2011
Vviv2

You sure can….just add bogan for instant arsehole! 😛

20 06 2011
lolplates

New drink…. Bundy and Redbull or Mother. Taste like arse… but doesn’t bundy anyway?

20 06 2011
James Hunter

Personally I will defer to your greater knowledge on that. !!

20 06 2011
Peter Thornton

Oh, James Hunter, in that case you need to defer to the knowledge of anyone!

21 06 2011
Vviv2

Speaking of arses….

20 06 2011
Tally

20 standard fights in every bottle.

I honestly believe I’ve witnessed THE MOST BOGAN WEDDING OF ALL TIME. I used to work in one of Adelaide’s ritzier wedding venues. We typically catered to very upscale clients and VIPs, which made said Bogue wedding all the more memorable.

The dashing gentlemen of the bridal party wore Bundy caps with their tuxes. For the entire evening. The groom didn’t even remove his cap for the bridal waltz. (Danced to some Bogue classic like ‘Endless Love’, I can’t remember specifically…)

We did an alternate-drop menu of chicken breast and fillet steak that evening, but, concerned that the menu was ‘too fancy’, the bridal table opted for… Wait for it…. Schnitty and chips. The same schnitzels we used to cut into strips and serve as a kids meal.

Sigh.

20 06 2011
Ash - Glassin' Carnts Who Touch Me Bundy

Jesus. Best mate’s wedding over the weekend was at a relatively low-key venue up the coast (booked mostly because of its connection to a mate through the Bogue Telegraph allowed them to get it cheap), yrs truly’s old band brought together to perform just for fun, the only cap was mine because you’ll pry it off my head when I’m cold and dead (or in the shower) and Italian for dinner (best mate’s wifey has an Italian uncle who hooked us all up). And I thought it was bogue just from the crowd.

Of course the bride-to-be had to attempt a Pippa Middleton dress – only it doesn’t work so well when yr still carrying some of yr baby weight. Speaking of the baby, he was dressed in a tux and I carried him during the ceremony as he was supposed to “give the ring” to his daddy (that is, me hold him as he placed the ring on Daddy’s finger, which isn’t an easy process when yr a seven month old baby).

Then, of course, we all got pissed and I hooked up with three bridesmaids. But that’s another story for another day and place.

23 06 2011
moar caek

beautiful.
I bet they kept the receipts for the wedding album.

20 06 2011
20 06 2011
Bag O'Turnips

Doesn’t excessive consumption of Bundaberg Rum cause blackened sweat, lr is that just some maxtreme über-bogan urban myth?

Even that trooly old-school 70s Aussie bogan boogie band—no, not Bon Scott-era Acca Dacca, but their Alberts label mates Ted Mulry Gang—had the good sense to sing a song about Jamaica Rum, as opposed to the good ol’ Bundy…even they knew the consequences would be even more dire on that latter cat’s wee, than those they listed within the lyrics about the former.

And as TISM suggest their “victims” to do, I indeed observe The Ted Commandments, Ted Mulry being one of them.

20 06 2011
James Hunter

BOT,
Dunno bout black sweat but word is a bottle in half a tank of petrol will clean the tank and fuel lines. Hmmmmm Wonder if it does the same thing for kidneys ?

15 02 2012
Lord Boofhead

Maybe it’s ’cause no one outside of Australia had heard of Bundy. Also rum was invented in Jamaica and that might have something to do with it.

The 80’s Aussie band Mental As Anything also sang about Jamaican Rum.

The only song I know about Bundy goes like this.

Bundaberg, Bundaberg,
Bundaberg Rum
It’ll tan your insides
And grow hair on your bum

20 06 2011
Ted Bundy and Coke

Does the thought of an anthropomorphised Arctic mammal glassing ice-shelved cunts (walruses, seals and so forth) disturb anyone else? As if global warming isn’t awful enough for these wretched beasts and prole-fuel mascots.

20 06 2011
Ash - Glassin' Carnts Who Touch Me Bundy

May as well glass themselves before global warming wipes them out.

22 06 2011
Bag O'Turnips

One kinda perversely hopes that with the advent of possible extinction of polar bears due to anthropogenic global warming, that the said logo on the bottle becomes something of a bogan talisman to aim for, i.e. cease to exist altogether and hope to become some mythical legend on the label of a bottle of dodgy boot polish syrup…one can only be so malevolent, I suppose.

23 06 2011
Ash - Glassin' Carnts Who Touch Me Bundy

The thought of polar bears glassing each other for the last bit of ice still amuses me.

21 06 2011
moar caek

😀

20 06 2011
gramnazi

As an experimenting teenager (in about 1987) I tried a bottle of OP bundy with a couple of mates. Can’t remember a single thing beyond the second glass.

Cunnova drink.

20 06 2011
.. reformed beauganne ..

Bundy rum is the most evil, vile revolting stinking thing I have ever had the mis fortune of indulging in as a wayward youth .. I vaguely remember pulling a burning plank from a 44 gallon drum and waving it menacingly in the direction of someone that had dared to do something completely irrelivant at the moment the full throttle bundy fueled idiocy kicked in .. I no longer drink and no one was hurt .. Thank God .. If you must drink spirits I do however recommend Beenleigh white rum .. An all together much nicer experience ..

15 02 2012
Lord Boofhead

You recommend white rum? So you are a sheila or a poofter then?

😉

20 06 2011
glass-o-rama

the irish pub @ knox shopping centre was the epicentre of bundy fuelled glassing shenanagins in the eastern suburbs…$5 bundy and coke pints…more dangerous than the Korangal valley!

21 06 2011
moar caek

as a young ‘un growing up in the wild untamed backwoods of Kawana Waters my introduction to alcohol poisoning was via Bundaberg Rum. From memory it was circa 12-15 bucks for a 750ml circa 1982-85. I got sick as a dog on it three times perhaps at different teen beach blanket schemozzles before I discovered cannabis. I couldn’t bear the smell rum for years.
Surprised no-one has mentioned the “Dark & Stormy” – Bundy and Ginger Beer. Maybe it’s ok. If I had to drink rum I’d go that way. I tried to start a habit of drinking bundy at State of Origin time, but it didn’t take. The last bottle I bought sat unfinished in the cupboard for nearly two years. I may have even actually just ditched it in the end.
Bundy is one of those solid bridges between the old and new school bogan. ay.

21 06 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms, Constant source of Randomness

Caek, I have consumed numerous Dark and Stormies but the ginger beer gets a bit much around the time you hit the dozen mark, just before you start trying to punch Emus

23 06 2011
moar caek

aaahh…
makes sense.
I bet that ginger burns on the way back up too.

are yr tanks full Si?
I’m considering changing my Stretch Denim Speed-Suit for something less hydroscopic. I’m running a prototype I knocked up with Gar Bags and insulation tape this afternoon. Just to get the sizing…

oh geez. I just had a mental vision of Womp trying to sneak into the terrorist headquarters in his tape suit….

Does anyone here remember “Double the Fist?” prolly the best show ever made.
Before “Go Back to Where You Came From” of course.

Steve Foxx is a god.
might go see my pirate mate….

23 06 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms, Constant source of Randomness

I’ve been working on my tank Moar. Heading to French Alps in August to do the 3 alps stage of the Tour de France as part of a bike tour. Their hills are a bit higher than Lofty, highest point we cycle to is 2700m! But my tank is good so I will be good. Watch stages 17 – 19 and that is what we are doing, very cool. Want to bring the Shogun?

24 06 2011
moar caek

Mais Oui!
Le Shogon sont tres bon pour les monts.
Il a un “Bag Rack” pour La Thermos du Cafe Chaud!
(et une autre jumper! 😉 )
mais, desole, ma chien “nutty” ne parlent pas bien le Dogue Francais. merde! Elle sont trop drole pour les Grenouilles!
Je reste ici.
la boulangerie tirer sont par ce que malheureusement dejuner. la bien tot!

24 06 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms, Constant source of Randomness

But Yes! The Shogon are tres good for the mounts. It has a “Bag Rack” for The Thermos of the Hot Cafe! (And another jumper!) But, desole, my dog “nutty” speak not well the Dogue Francais. fuck! She are too drole for the Frogs! I remain here. the bakery to pull are by what unfortunately dejuner. the good tot

*google translation*

Shame Nuts can’t parlevou francais, ah well.

24 06 2011
James Hunter

Simon,
Reminds me of MrsH telling a coach driver in Brazil that her Husband “is a toilet” so very droll.

21 06 2011
21 06 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms, Constant source of Randomness

For f*cks sake. Just when you think we can’t get any lamer……………

22 06 2011
Edward

The Simpsons were right. There is an episode in which Grandpa Simpson is recounting an anecdote, and in setting the scene, says that he was wearing an onion hanging from his belt, that being the fashion of the time. I guess there will always be something people do, though it makes no object sense, but is nevertheless fashionable.

I’m just waiting for the day to come when someone is showing their as yet unborn grandchild old pictures of themselves, and will have to explain bumster jeans with a midriff top. Or worse yet, jeggings. Word to the wise, never wear jeggings anywhere there may be a camera (which is pretty much everywhere in an urban environment). There is no valid explanation.

22 06 2011
James Hunter

Edward,
Jeggings, Hmmmmm That word has a realy bad sound to it.
BTW
If you wear an onion round your neck it keeps tree snakes away.
Haven you noticed how few tree snakes there are ? must work.

22 06 2011
Peter Thornton

Oh, James Hunter, Lower Dogpatch is tolerably full of tree snakes. Learn about you locale before you make any more fatuous pronouncements!

23 06 2011
moar caek

I will have to explain the pale yellow pants and the pastel pink mesh polo I am wearing in my army enlistment phot0 from 1985.
’tis the great wheel of life Mr Edward.

21 06 2011
Benny Hill

Love the stuff, even the marketing genius that is Bundy Red. I love cheap shit, that’s why I read this blog.

21 06 2011
Mick

Speaking of bogan drinks, yesterday I had to take my car to the panel shop to get a quote for repairs. Got the bloke to do a quick hammer job so tyres wouldn’t rub. Offered him a bottle of something nice for his troubles. What did he ask for?

Yep, Bundy. Or a slab of coronas or crownies. I laughed all fo the way home.

21 06 2011
martin

Liking Crown is unforgivable. It’s like liking Nickelback. The other two I can tolerate.

21 06 2011
Mick

And you think I’m a bigger bogan than you. Pfft!

21 06 2011
martin

Yeah well you’re a tradie or something so you lot are guilty until proven innocent.

I don’t know about Bundy but I still say Corona has a place in the seasoned beer drinker’s collection.

21 06 2011
Mick

Pour the Corona down the sink and try one of the many delights that Dos Equis can give you. Still not the greatest but if you must drink Mexican, don’t drink the worst.

21 06 2011
James Hunter

Coopers green lable or if you like a real chewy bear the red lable “Pale Ale” Now that is a beer

23 06 2011
moar caek

green label is Pale. it’s mother’s milk. and I am not a native croweater. the red label is Sparkling. apparently more palatable to the neophyte than Pale? it’s more common over east.

21 06 2011
martin

I’ve been trying lots of beers lately. Sassy Red and Big Helga have been the winners. Coopers I consider dross.

And some Indian Elephant Beer which I can’t remember the name of.

I even had a Sheaf Stout, it has a fairly strong licorice aftertaste to it but I don’t like licorice.

15 07 2011
Ash - I Don't Want To Glass Carnts But The Guvmint Controls My Mind

I drank far too much Dos Equis in Dallas.

21 06 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms, Constant source of Randomness

Corona is the Kings of Leon of beer. Pale, tasteless dross loved by wankers.

21 06 2011
martin

Yeah right. Wine is the Coldplay of alchohol. Loved by faux intelligent people who were too gutless to like U2 and see through the grey areas.

Beer and spirits are where the real nuances are discovered and the englightenment of the human condition occurs.

21 06 2011
Vviv2

That’s way better than being cowardly & obnoxious…..

21 06 2011
martin

Your boyfriend was better. He’d at least provide a bit more context.

21 06 2011
Vviv2

Sorry Martin, I posted that in the wrong place! It was supposed to be a reply to Oh Peter….
Boyfriend? I’d rather glass myself! :-p

22 06 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms, Constant source of Randomness

U2 is like the Woodies of music. Large, expensive, popular with a horrible fore and aftertaste.

21 06 2011
Peter Thornton

‘Corona has a place in the seasoned beer drinker’s collection’? you bloody prole, Corona is a bog standard beer from Mexico – a country not highly regarded for the quality of even its best quality beers – that’s about as collectable as Fosters Lager. Good Lord, martin, you’re dumb!

21 06 2011
Vviv2

I’ll try getting my comment in the right place now… 😛

21 06 2011
martin

Rejecting things based on their working class image or roots is so bogan.

10 11 2011
Bogan Observer correspondent

Cooper’s Sparkling (Red Label) is the rocket-fuel of Australian beers. For something foreign that’s better than corona, go north, for Singapore’s Tiger, or Philippines San Mig, Pilsener is delish,. and the Red Horse of the archipelago has a kick badder’n a mule…

For continued discussion of beers of Merit, we should look at various boutique lines…

As for Bundy, in various guises, we dont all suffer from ‘Fight in a Bottle’ syndrome, even the OP finds me merry and friendly…

Lervvvvvvvvvvvvvvve that Royal Liqueur Though

21 06 2011
AshR- the second youngest's called Melaena

Up here in the rarified surrounds of K-Town Heights, we sophists much prefer the beveragic splendour of…..Bundy Liqueur.

Bear Branded duelling juice made from 65% Bundy Rum, 34% Chocolate topping, 0.8% Liquid Hate and 0.2% Tears of Bronwyn Bishop.

21 06 2011
James Hunter

AshR,
You are a brave man letting any ,even small, percentage of Bronwyn Hiccup near your lips !

23 06 2011
AshR- the second youngest's called Melaena

My mouth wouldn’t be my first choice to let old Bronny touch. Something about strict old men really does it for me…

21 06 2011
urbanreverie

And, due to popular demand, I am now able to present to you, for the first time ever, in the latest 3D Dolby 5.1 surround sound 1080p high definition quad-band 62-inch TV technology, something that I know you’ve all been waiting for …

THE BOGUE & BOGUETTE SHOW BLOG!!!

That’s right, folks! All 22 episodes of your favourite documentary series exploring the whacky lives of your favourite outer-suburban bogoids … IN THE ONE PLACE!!!

Check it out here:

http://bogueandboguetteshow.wordpress.com/

Don’t worry … you’ll still be able to watch your favourite show every week here on Things Bogans Like .. but now you won’t have to stuff about with Google to find your favourite past episode!

21 06 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms, Constant source of Randomness

That’s very cool Urban.

21 06 2011
James Hunter

Simon,
Yes but ,no but yes ,um but no but yes that is excellent BUT,what I’m waiting for with baited breath is the publishing of the collected wise thoughts of Peter.

21 06 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms, Constant source of Randomness

James, here they are

The End.

21 06 2011
James Hunter

Simon,
Couldn’t you have been a bit more succinct ?

21 06 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms, Constant source of Randomness

.

21 06 2011
James Hunter

10,10,10,10,10, Gold.

21 06 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms, Constant source of Randomness

Oh James Hunter. A brace of 10’s. Thanks dude.

21 06 2011
Vviv2

/ \O/ / \O/ / \O/ / \O/ / \O/
And the crowd goes wild……

21 06 2011
Vviv2

Thanx Urban, now I can read them all from the start…. very clever.

23 06 2011
moar caek

and I can go and trash someone else’s blog too…
and you never tweet.

23 06 2011
Vviv2

Eeerr….. tweet tweet, chirp chirp? 😛

24 06 2011
moar caek

now.
isn’t that better?

24 06 2011
Vviv2

I can die happy & fulfilled….

21 06 2011
James

Ah, nice to see an article that’s actually about bogans again for a change. It’s been a while!

21 06 2011
martin

I’ve only ever had bundy once. I hooked up with a young bogan girl and she wanted it so I bought it for her, she also wanted anal later that night but anal grossed me out at the time so I didn’t go through with it. I missed out on quite a desirable bogan combo there.

I think one of the reasons why I’ve never had an inkling for rum is because of those famous bogan delicacies from the 80s, rum balls. How f#cken gross were they.

The bogan just has rum with coke anyway so what’s the point. I’ll just stick to beer for now, I might even try to become a wine p00f like Simon.

21 06 2011
Ash - Glassin' 2 Carnts For Every VB Drunk

Martin, ya carnt. If yr going to go the spirit route, at least have yrself some decent liquor.

21 06 2011
martin

Nah. Most of you spirits drinkers are pussies who just mix it with something like orange juice or lemonade and I’m not tough enough to drink straight scotch.

21 06 2011
Ash - Glassin' 2 Carnts For Every VB Drunk

What’d ya take me for, some kind of p00fta? Orange juice…farkin’ hell. I drink me vodka and me whisky straight from the bottle.

23 06 2011
moar caek

Introduce youself to wine by adding a measure of Gin to a nice Moscato this summer.
Moscato is an excellent breakfast wine. good with Cornflakes.
I like mixing some spirits with dry. also you can then fake it (play safe on GHB and just don’t drink at all kids) by just getting a small glass of dry ginger.
my beer palate is heeaps better than my wine palate, but wine is infinite…
and it’s about geography. I’m surrounded by premium wine.

21 06 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms, Constant source of Randomness

That’s the go Martin. Wine is for true drinkers like Caek and myself. Or you could hardline with Metho like JH.

21 06 2011
James Hunter

Simon,
You realy need to let it age a bit to mellow. Like 15 to 20 minutes should be fine. Mind you some fine old examples that may be stumbled upon (sic) in the backs of mens sheds are many years and are real collectors vintages best consummed straight and realy well chilled like a good vodka.

23 06 2011
moar caek

agreed.
chilling is essential.
which is handy if you’re sleeping rough in the winter.
😉

23 06 2011
James Hunter

MC,
MC,
Too true. Mind you for people like myself conserving the last of our neurons and synapses here at Lower Dogpatch on a cold night is not an ambition to compete with the infusion of warmth that a gullet full of “The Right Stuff” provides
Unfortunately down the road just about 5 clicks at Thornton where psudointellectualism is supplanting genius at an alarming rate the only thing the unhappy multitudes have to warm their souls is the glow of perfection from recollections of past glories. So sad.Sniff sob.
If you know what I mean !

23 06 2011
Peter Thornton

Oh, James Hunter, you have to ask if we know what you mean?

21 06 2011
James Hunter

Martin,
If you are going to become a wine pOOf then you may have to get used to anal ?

21 06 2011
martin

Ha ha you’re funny.

Nah I can’t do it. Wine is gay. I might try this metho thing. Maybe kerosene. When I used to mow lawns I always liked the sniff of the petrol. It’s about the only good thing about mowing the lawn.

21 06 2011
Max

And it’s not even Australian, being wholly owned by Diageo, the UK conglomerate that owns just about all the world’s booze!

22 06 2011
Bag O'Turnips

Nah, you’re wrong! Being a Rool Aussie is all about deifying all those supposedly dinky-di, true-blue, she’ll-be-roight Strayan icons, despite the fact that they’re either no longer locally owned (but generally still made on these shores, so it still must be Strayan!) like Bundaberg Rum, or never even were locally owned, such as Holden cars, which has been owned by General Motors of the US of A long before the 48-215 (a.k.a. the first FX model) debuted in 1948.

There’s nothing more Aussie! Aussie! Aussie! Oi! Oi! Oi! (itself appropriated from an English football chant) than having your arse owned by some overseas conglomerate, all for a handful of token feel-good nationalism.

23 06 2011
whistlingnixie

Even worse is “Aussie Pr(o)ide” slogans tattooed in American gangsta-style blackletter.

22 06 2011
Davo

Rum, chocolate and nuts, in a fine ammo box. Thats some classy sh!t.

22 06 2011
Pedantic

A couple of points of order here….

“The bogan’s grandfather’s sexual and pugilistic conquests were fuelled by Bundaberg’s eponymous liquor, as were the bogan’s father’s, and now it is the turn of the modern bogan to do much the same.”

It’s not just the grandpapa of the bogan who were in on this one TBL! Most conveniently forget (or perhaps they weren’t aware) that the colony of NSW was run on rum, circa the time of Governor Macquarie, who was hugely reformist precisely because he took on the Rum Corp. Explains a thing or two dunnit?

I also think you might have missed a little bit of something-something, here….

“In addition to sponsoring bogan-approved things as the Wallabies, the Waratahs (aka the ‘Tahs for all those north of the Murray)”

In which lifetime has Ra-Ra been the province of the bogans??? TBL you’ve completely misclassified your stereotype here! Anyone who has had even a passing glimpse of the support base for Union in Australia knows that it is the province of the plum-in-mouth squatocracy and inner-city private schoolboys and their upper echelon parentage. Whilst this may eventually make way for the bogan after what the Howard government did to public education, it hasn’t had long enough yet to be the case.

Do the wonders of Bundy assist in the regression of said RaRa’s INTO boganics… ?

23 06 2011
martin

What’s Ra-Ra?

I remember there was a time when bogans used to say “ra ra ra” in place of “and so on” or “etcetera”. Thoroughly repulsive and annoying it was.

But I agree Rugby Union is the domain of yuppy bogans. Yes, very well put, the squatocracy or oligarchy. Making it one of the most if not the most ugliest sports in the world.

23 06 2011
urbanreverie

Martin, the “Ra-Ra” crowd … Go to Sydney Uni or New South, you’ll see them swaggering around campus like they own the place. They typically wear “Greater” “Public” Schools rugby jerseys, wear boat shoes without socks, (in winter) have a Ralph Lauren jumper slung over their shoulder, often live in colleges because six or thirteen years of GPS schooling has left them thoroughly institutionalised and completely unable to cope with independent living, walk around in groups talking at the top of their lungs exuding a particularly virulent type of hyper-masculinity, espouse reactionary views on politics and society even more loathsome and ignorant than anything you’d find in any working-class tavern in the western suburbs, and start Facebook groups which are supportive of rape.

I don’t know where the term “Ra-Ra” comes from. Probably because when they get drunk at the student union bars, which is very often and also oten quite early in the day, their collective jabbering does sound a little bit like “ra-ra-ra-ra-ra-ra-ra”.

I used to nickname them “organ pipes” because, regardless of their height, they all looked the same – the same crew cuts, the same fat red faces, the same jerseys and dress shorts and boat shoes.

After they graduate, they then become captains of industry and the leading lights of the legal fraternity. Some even become Liberal Party politicians. They still never lose the “Ra-Ra” spirit though; they just become a bit better at hiding it when the cameras or microphones are around.

24 06 2011
Peter Thornton

You forgot to mention many a ra-ra has married a steroid-chomping female weight lifter. Something about this practise alone make it very suspect. You want (or need) evidence? Just look at the Sydney legal fraternity.

As a side note: Oh, James Hunter, don’t even think about interjecting here. You’re not from Sydney and therefore not qualified to weigh-in with any opinion (although you certainly have the weight to ‘weigh-in’…)

24 06 2011
James Hunter

Pete Babe,
I probably know the Forrest Lodge a lot better then you

23 06 2011
Edward

Naturally rum was used as a defacto currency in colonial New South Wales. Rum was one of the most abundant spirits in the British economy at that time. A glutted market applied downwards pressure on price, and it travelled well.

In other news (completely unrelated to the above) Kevin Rudd has been referring to the Gillard occupied Lodge (and presumably by extension Kirribilli House) as “Boganville”, apparently.

23 06 2011
moar caek

Bundy has moved on from Rugger.
and back in the day Bundy spoke more of the B&S culture of the Country Boarders who played Rugby.
I always thought.
I’d venture this was a (small) foundation stone in the rise of modern boganity.

well done on the Rum Corps reference.
full marks.
I wonder at the quality of the day? and wonder also if it was not akin to the “Gin” of the mother country.
ie pretty much made of anything fermentable and distillable

23 06 2011
Edward

It was reputedly. The mass market intoxicant of choice among the demi-monde was generally the cheapest, most potent product on the market. Brandy from France and Italy in the 17th century, rum from the Caribbean and Africa in the 18th and gin from Switzerland in the 19th all got their start in Britain that way. So did port (from Portugal) and sherry (from Spain). Foreign or external producers had more stock than they could sell on the domestic market, so they cut their losses by reducing the price and shipping it England. It happened with anything which could arrive in a more or less drinkable condition after sloshing around in the barrel, being alternately warmed during the day and chilled during the night. Beers and wines generally don’t, Fortified wines and spirits generally do.

23 06 2011
Mick

Oi, TBL…you lot had better get young Raquel from that Go Back show on SBS up on your banner. She’s gonna be a star.

I can see Zoo Weekly in her future.

23 06 2011
moar caek

..and then dancing with the stars.
what a waste of skin.
next time I’m overseas I’m gonna pretend to be a Kiwi.

23 06 2011
p'bee

i kinda think she’s beneath even zoo weekly’s standards. one of the worst human beings i’ve ever had the misfortune to hear.

23 06 2011
Mick

It takes a village to raise a child.

I feel sorry for her. The village that has raised her is News Ltd. ACA. Today Tonight. Andrew Bolt. Allan Jones and Co. Pauline Hanson. John Howard. The true scum of this country.

She had no chance.

24 06 2011
moar caek

bravo.
hope your truffles are fresh Rupert’

23 06 2011
Ash - Glassin' Carnts Who Touch Me Bundy

I refused to watch that show, but I heard about her on Twitter.

I suspect I’m better off.

23 06 2011
p'bee

actually, having just finished watching the last episode, she did change her opinions pretty dramatically, and i have to say i’m really impressed because i seriously didn’t expect anything from her. i’m glad she proved me wrong.
you should also be proud of the shire lifeguard – he became really compassionate and open really quickly; the south australian woman raye too.
get on sbs and watch it all. it is confronting, and you do want to punch a number of the participants quite a few times, but it is worth seeing.

23 06 2011
Ash - Glassin' Carnts Who Touch Me Bundy

I actually know Adam (the lifeguard) – not that well, but when you’ve surfed Wanda and Elouera for so many years you tend to know many of the lifeguards on a first name basis. I don’t get on with most of them (farkin aggro carnts) but the few times I ran in with him he seemed like an OK and fair bloke. It doesn’t surprise me that he would have been a bit more open-minded.

23 06 2011
Edward

I haven’t watched this television show, but I have see advertisements. I did some checking on YouTube to obtain the name of one of the other participants.

The blonde lady referred to as Raye has been featured heavily. Speaking of last years Christmas Island shipwreck she said “My first thought was, ‘serves the bastard right”. She seems lacking in elementary human compassion. She was, after all, speaking of the greatest loss of life in a maritime disaster in Australian waters since the Second World War; when a hospital ship was torpedoed off the northern New South Wales coast.

I don’t like her, I think.

23 06 2011
p'bee

despite that and a couple of other really vile things she says at the beginning, she’s pretty awesome.

24 06 2011
Edward

See, peoples first, most spontaneous response to novel stimulus is most indicative a base traits. She may have resiled from her previous position on this subject, but in others she would be working from the the same basal ideation. She came to the attention of the shows producers when they saw her at a town hall meeting. She offered the opinion that asylum seekers should be made to suffer on that occasion.

Formula reality television casting applies. The producers have a narrative in mind and will choose the audition tapes of those who will serve that end. From the outset, I was certain that the set-up would include a bunch of people who would be willing to assert a suitably controversial position, and then achieve a public redemption by having a change of heart. In the theatre of public entertainment (in the age of fifteen minutes of fame reality television), this is the equivalent of deathbed confession.

There was also a token lib-tard, I don’t know whether they did what I expected with her. Perhaps someone who watched could confirm my suspicion that while the others redeemed, she fell by expression of the opinion that the countries people have come from are awful, and people get the governments they deserve. Or just that the food is bad, it’s dirty and smells.

25 06 2011
moar caek

sbs should get some credit for making the whole thing with an old transit van, a polaroid camera, a ball of string and a commodore Amiga.
which they borrowed from the ABC no doubt.
actually, that may be why there’s so little on News 24; theyre waiting for SBS to give their production facilities back.
either that or Joe O’Brien has some compromising photos of someone.

25 06 2011
moar caek

I don;t completely buy it yet either PB.
Raye has had a turn around, but from what I saw on the Drum, it’s only for “the ones I met” (who are christians and can’t afford a leaky boat ride) so whilst she might no longer wish death on them, she’s still not keen on (rich muslims who won’t queue) boat people.
kudos to her thus far, credit where it’s due.
You can take the girl out of Inverbrachie, but can you take Inverbrachie out of the (old) girl?
either way, I doubt it’s got the legs for the Kraken.
I personally got subjected to two “anti” rants from people who hadn’t even watched the show. People are pre-polarised on this stuff and it akes a peak experience like Raye had to shift. I bet rackelle was telling all and sundry about all the filthy |\|1663R5
and 600|<5 in their filthy camp. as soon as she got off the plane. No redemption there.
The most common sentiment on twitter seemed to be that anyone who might benefit from watching it just wouldn't watch it. unless they was draggeg by brutal tolchocking chassos and handed over to Doctor bratchnies and made to viddy it with their glazzies all pinned open and their nasty rookers tied down.
so
yeah.
and that never works.
and so it will itty on to like the end of the world.

25 06 2011
Edward

Hee, hee, hee, “brutal tolchocking”. Now, I would watch an SBS serial in which reactionary bigots were kicked the the yarbles, if they have any yarbles. That would be horror-show.

23 06 2011
AK

Hey TBL, don’t forget the ute bogans, who love to have big head shot stickers of the Bundy Bear on their back windows.

23 06 2011
Davo

The ultimate bogan ute has a bundy sticker on the hood.

24 06 2011
AshR- the second youngest's called Melaena

And a “Rum fueled circle jerk machine” sticker on the tailgate. Oh and mudflaps made from 40 inch wide conveyor belt rubber with B&S Bandit handwrit large across them….

23 06 2011
Loftie

Bundy is Shit………

That is all.

25 06 2011
Steve

28 06 2011
Rob Innes

I’ll give Bundy some credit, the people in charge of marketing are very smart, they know exactly how to appeal to their target market.

28 06 2011
Brad

Can I just point out that the ‘tahs and the Wallabies are not bogan-approved?

The bogan (quite notably some members of my family with which I no longer have contact), is disapproving of all things Rugby Union, especially affiliations with “education”, “career success” and “team values”.

No, Rugby Union is upper-echelon, high-income, moderate view approved.

Rugby league on the other hand…

28 06 2011
Brad

My apologies, I of course meant, with whom…

7 07 2011
Jimbo

You’re right. Get on the Daily Telegraph website, and every match report about a union match will have plenty of comments from bogans whinging about how much worse union is than league.

20 08 2011
Chris

In Mount Isa Bundy and Cola sold in the can is known as a ‘black rat’.

“Lets sink a few black rats n’ go down to tha Buffalo Club n’ see if theres any sluts out tonight. Fuck yeah!”

23 09 2011
bundy

u know after reading all of the reply about the bogan drink and how half think it make’s you fight what a load of crap. i’ve been rum and coke for well over 15 year’s of my life and 10 year’s of that was going though the bns’s. i have never wanted to punch on with anyone ever and it has been making ugly girl’s good looking since 1888. i just think half of you people are shit scared to have a good go at drinking it and yes i’ve known for a long time it is not australian own anymore and to tip it off 96% of rum sold is in australia,2% in new zealand and 2% in canada…

28 04 2015
Bundy

Mate, I agree with Bundy. I have had numerous bottles in one night & have never wanted to punch on. I have been drinking it for over 20 years & it keeps getting better. You people are just weak & drink girls drinks. I bet you haven’t even smelt the new Bundy’s. Oh that’s right, it’s bogan shit.

10 11 2011
Bogan Observer correspondent

And then there’s The Hoochery, but Shhhhhhhh!!! Rum for the really knowledgeable unbogan

19 12 2011
Adrian

I drink Bundy all the time, and I’m not a bogan. I’m sick of getting insulted by people all the time just because I like a certain drink.

This is always coming from someone with a VB or some other stereotypical bogan drink in their hand too.

6 02 2012
Ian

Hahahaha
Yep 40 years on Bundy and coke when the ‘boys’ drank beer and now people are offering me $1500 for a 20 bottle. LOL Still the most beautiful drink on the planet for a man. But of course girls and peddle pushers drink all sorts of pure white spirits like true refined posers they are. LOL
When you grow up guys you’ll be able to handle a true drink and never been even remotely tempted to punch people until the drinkers of keg bear. I;ve watched make gosses of themselves. Love the debate though.

15 02 2012
Lord Boofhead

Anyone seen the add for Bundy clear. Its scary its like a snapshot of what bogans think is classy…

15 02 2012
James Hunter

Yeh, but no, but yeh but no …..but no,
you can’t run your Maloo ute on bundy
but you can run it on “Pure polish spirit”
140 Proof
man if the Germans had thought of it the V2s would have reached New York !!

5 11 2012
sutton barcelona

Generally I do not read article on blogs, however I would like to say that this write-up very pressured me to check out and do it! Your writing taste has been surprised me. Thanks, quite nice post.

8 11 2012
James Hunter

Sutton,
Are you from Barcelona ? Your syntax has a “romance language” touch to it. ?
If you are, make sure you go see the World Ralley Championship. !Citroen to win !

18 04 2015
Logan from Bogan

Limited edition Bundy rum was part of my mate’s divorce settlement. Split 50:50!

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