This man is arguably Australian sport’s foremost bogan, and he has a history as lengthy as a glassing fight between two bogans brandishing plastic cups. The equation is simple. Bogans love sport, bogans love people who validate their own boganic behaviour, and therefore bogans REALLY love Brendan Fevola. 
The first signs appeared in 1998, when Fevola (then still playing junior football) appeared in “The Draft”, an ABC documentary following three 17 year old aspiring footballers. In it, baby Fev displayed x-treme disdain for the rules, and the ability to kick goals. It was the latter trait that compelled Carlton to recruit him at the end of the year, and he went on to build an imposing list of goalkicking feats during his years at the club. But Fev isn’t just a typical sportsman, he’s a lot more bogan than that. Just like the bogan loves for itself, Fevola capitalises on the good work of everyone else to take the glory, and when his teammates don’t give him the ball/attention he thinks he deserves, the tantrums are spectacular.
Fev wasn’t content to express himself with tribal tattooing, he had a thirst for more. The “thirst” bit was for vast amounts of liquor, and the “more” bit was for all of the stuff that happens after he slakes his aforementioned thirst. One of the side-effects of all of this thirst-slaking is the urgent need to urinate, which he resolved in true boganic fashion by pissing on the front wall of a bar in Prahran in 2008.
Of course, Fev’s on/off marriage to a busty bottle blonde has been most notably punctuated by a famed affair with prime bogan lust target Lara Bingle. Not content with adultery, Fev took the chance to display his photographic prowess in the bathroom. Bingle, now astride bogan hero Michael Clarke, has recently enlisted the agency services of famed scandal factory Max Markson, plonking Fev back in hot water. The Bingling mingling was singling out Fevola for defamation cash jingling, due to him revealing her breasts to the world, despite it being what she already did for a bogan-fuelled living.
A successful profession
al sports career has served to open the world up for Fev. When on tour with the Australian International Rules team in Ireland in 2006, he represented the mighty Southern Cross by belting a Galway barman half his size. Back home, he endeared himself to the bogan TV viewer by getting max-hammered at the Brownlow, and carrying on like a tiprat on national TV for bogan mirth institution The Footy Show. This proved the final straw for Carlton, who shipped him off to the state that brought us Barnaby Joyce and the 3 Park Superpass. While Queensland’s iconic beer is only a mid-strength, this should prove to be only a minor obstacle to a proven achiever like Fev.
A champion goalkicker/troublemaker like Fevola could be excused for resting on his laurels, but this would be to not comprehend what made him a champion in the first place. Fev has been studying Criminology by correspondence at Griffith University, presumably with the aim of better understanding just what he can piss on, glass, punch, and take photos of without getting sent to prison.
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Thank you sirs.
Congratulations on your 100th entry. Keep ’em coming!
ditto. congrats fellas on the ton; raise the V100 slazenger to the member’s pavillion and kiss the southern cross tattoo on your forearm…surely there’s a book deal in the works? the original “stuff white people like” is of lower quality…
Let’s Face it – the list could go on and on and on….All these things are embedded into the very fabric of Australian society and are quintessential.
ALL AUSTRALIANS ARE BOGANS…LET’S FACE THE BIGGEST PROBLEM THIS COUNTRY IS FACING!!…………There are a few expats (never to return to that arid, unsophisticated, hellhole) that are not. The problem is Australia is so entrenched in the cloak of boganism i.e. 95% of people are uncultured, ignorant and rough that living IN Australia and escaping it is virtually impossible – no matter the best intentions of parents to educate their children etc… The plastic culture is too enveloped, too powerful – only a social or cultural revolution can overturn it now…..The Australian accent is a classic example – it’s universally HORRIBLE and COMMON….I struggle to differentiate between my doctors and my plumbers anymore…Let’s face it folks, Australia is destined to be just as Mark Twai described it when he visited many moons ago, ‘inhabited by the lowest forms of anywhere on earth’…..I look forward to all the replies of expected denial…
Haze, you must be an uptight, ignorant pommie. I’m guessing you also have bad teeth. They all do.
Brilliant! I was kind of hoping 100 would be Lara Bingle, but this is top of field.
“The Bingling mingling was singling out Fevola for defamation cash jingling”… fantastic work, TBL. How about a post on “The Footy Trip”, since we haven’t seen UFC/MMA yet?
Pure XXXX Gold!
I wonder if the TBL Facebook group will hit 5,000 fans today? Would be a fitting way to celebrate TBL’s 100th entry.
Queer game for queer players. Nuff sed.
would it be boganistic of me to chime in with “GayFL”? haha
Well I mean queer as in peculiar, but your interpretation is good. All that scrabbling around on their knees on the ground is just begging for an illegal entry.
surely rugby scrums would fit that sort of interpretation better?
From what I’ve seen of GayFL they throw the ball in the air, everyone leaps over top of each other for it, misses, then ends up scrambling around the turf on hands and knees chasing it. Why not just stay home and play marbles? ;)
Ah perhaps PB, but Gay doesn’t rhyme so well with Rugby…
Fev has come to his true home. Darren Bradshaw was far too polite and considered for Brisbane. I predict a remarkable two year career for Fev at the Lions.
That would be Daniel Bradshaw… ;-P
‘………………Bingle, now astride bogan hero Michael Clarke………..”
LOL
Just imagine what he would’ve gotten away with 20 years ago under the reign of the bogans fave millionaire, Mr. J. Elliot
Pig’s arse!
which team is “Pig ” on ??
You forget that on the Ireland trip big Fev spat in the the vomit on the floor of the pub that his team-mate deposited there.
In fact good old google shall provide………..
Irish barman Paul Murray gives his account of what happened when Brendan Fevola and 14 other Australian footballers came into his bar after their game against Ireland: “They started to get rowdy, taking the piss out of the bar staff, cursing at the staff and calling them ‘little Irish poofs’ for 10 or 15 minutes. The guy beside [Fevola] started to get sick on the ground, and he [Fevola] was spitting into the man’s vomit. I could put up with the name-calling for a while, but that was disgusting.”
source: http://www.smh.com.au/news/sport/charmed-im-not-sure-these-days/2006/11/10/1162661897438.html?page=fullpage#contentSwap2
Thanks for enlightening me. I’d never heard of this bloke before the current bingle bungle (where there are enough headlines to get the picture, so to speak).
Frankly I am in awe of this bloke.
What he appears to have been up to boggles the mind. Is this for real? How much of this is exaggerated? This bloke is tolerated, or (gasp) revered?
Wow.
LOL. Those of us on Twitter should have realised this “back to the future” entry would be #100.
Fevola is a ‘Wogan’
Back in the bad old days, in less enlightened times, people used to make jokes about groups of people they felt superior to. People used to make generalisations about whole groups of people they felt were inferior, and they used to sneer and laugh at those people. They did this because it was a cheap and easy way of getting a laugh, and because many people have an unfortunate psychological need to look down on others, in order to make themselves feel better. This need is often the result of a deep-seated feeling of inferiority or insecurity within the person who mocks and sneers at other groups of people.
Back in the bad old days, this kind of behaviour was exhibited by sneering at, and making nasty jokes about, “Abos”, “Chinks”, “Slopes”, “Wogs”, “Fags”, ”Spastics” and other minority groups in society. These days, it’s not considered polite or acceptable to make nasty jokes about these groups of people. This kind of humour has largely died out, at least in “polite” circles.
But the mentality behind this kind of “joke” hasn’t died out. For example, it is – apparently – acceptable to look down upon, and sneer at, “Bogans”. People who probably consider themselves to be enlightened, educated and sophisticated – and who probably wouldn’t dream of making a joke about “Abos”, “Slopes” or “Fags” – are quite happy to make sneering generalisations about “Bogans”. Such people won’t make jokes about “Abos”, “Wogs” or “Spastics”, because this is no longer socially acceptable. However, they can get away with mocking “Bogans”, and so they do.
While the target of this kind of “humour” has changed over the years, the basic motivation behind these “jokes” hasn’t. Unfortunately, some people lack self esteem and are insecure, and they need to make themselves feel better by mocking people they consider to be inferior to themselves. They need to identify an “out group”, a group that is readily identifiable and is distinct from themselves, that they can feel superior to and mock, with impunity.
It’s worth noting that the people who do this are cowards. They will only sneer at and mock a group who can’t or won’t fight back, or a group that is socially acceptable to mock at the time. Hence they wouldn’t dream of sneering at an “Abo” , a “Rag Head” or a “Fag” these days, because this is not considered socially acceptable. However they will sneer at a “Bogan”, because they can do so without attracting social opprobrium.
So – to whoever is behind this blog, and to whoever finds it amusing – you are nothing more than a nasty, insecure bigot. And you’re a coward. You need to have a long, hard look at yourself. If you do, you may not like what you see. I know I don’t.
Too many “inverted commas”. TBL
You sir, are a bogan, oh and a wanker.
LOL – I point out all the reasons why you’re a total fuckwit for sneering at “bogans”, and your response it so call me a “bogan”. What a fucking idiot…you have no idea, do you…
Andrew, you’re feet are smelly.
how is andrew
*rain dances*
(then glasses cunt)
Oh. I thought Simon was wrong there for a second.
Nope, trust me his feet smell, all bogans have smelly feet. Comes from wearing synthetic shoes and socks.
Can we get a chant going?
“Annndrew’s a wanka… Andrews a…. “
Simon ,you are very suscinct today ?
Yes.
I’m not sure if you are trolling here, but I’ll take a bite. I hope someone who is more eloquent than I will pipe up at some point…
First up, you seem to be making the general argument that all satire is bad. That seems entirely unreasonable to me. Do you really believe that?
Is everyone that satirises a segment of the population (or in our case a collection of traits) a bigot and a coward? Where do you draw the line?
I don’t pick on Aboriginals, Asians or Homosexuals. I’m not going to pick/laugh at someone because of the colour of their skin, their disabilities, their culture, or their sexual orientations. I’m not going to pick on what a person is.
What I will pick on is what people *do to others*, and their effect on the rest of us. I’d like to think most of the people here feel similarly. I’m here because of things that have been done to me by “bogans”. I’m not sitting here on the sidelines pointing and laughing at people that I know nothing about.
Your examples all fall into the former category. at TBL, this satire is not based on blind fear or ignorance of what is different. Heck, many of us are likely to have gone through the bogan stage ourselves. I did. I took a hard look at myself and tried to improve.
“So – to whoever is behind this blog, and to whoever finds it amusing – you are nothing more than a nasty, insecure bigot. And you’re a coward. You need to have a long, hard look at yourself. If you do, you may not like what you see. I know I don’t.”
You have the right to say this, but I take some offence. That’s a sweeping generalisation by someone who doesn’t seem to understand the point of this site. Have a look at all the entries here, and the comments, and have another think. Take a look at yourself – don’t be so quick to judge.
Take another look at today’s entry. Is it a personal attack at Mr Fevola the person? Who he is?
Or instead is it some very well written satire venting about the kind of folk that mean that his terrible behaviour is tolerated, or even revered? Or the hurtful actions he has taken agains his peers and complete strangers? For me it is the latter two.
Who takes photos of their girlfriends in the shower and shows them too his mates? Really! I’d much rather chuckle about it than get more angry and bitter.
THAT, for me, is the mentality behind this site.
well done benjamin i swear andrew left his openmind in the bottom of his coffee cup this morning
I’m not sure why you’re all bothing with responding to this obvious troll…
nice writing Benj.
beautifully put.
I will add, for posterity (and while the coffee’s brewing) that I believe we are swimming hard against a great current of intolerance, ignorance, voyeurism, mindless consumption and self justification in our everyday lives. If I could contribute in any way to this society building something greater than a shopping mall. I would. but I’m lazy. and probably mentally ill. But If I can get just one person to stop saying “wog” and understand why…
well, it was worth the trip.
Andrew,
you totally miss point – the groups you highlighted are born that way, bogans every day make an effort to behave in ways that are contemptible. young fevola exhibits all the attributes of a drunken, brainless, racist, violent, anti-social, homophobic individual – the generic term for which is bogan.
Andrew, as far as I can tell the originators of this blog should be congratulated. It’s known in the comedy industry that the hardest laughs you’ll get from an audience are when you hold up a mirror for them, in which they can see themselves, or at least facets of themselves. It seems the originators of TBL have that craft down pat.
As soon as I read/hear “You need to have a long, hard look at yourself.”
I just know that it’s coming from a bogan……
Yes, not a badly constructed argument, Andrew and eloquently expressed.
Unfortunately, it all comes crashing down in your second paragraph:
“Back in the bad old days, this kind of behaviour was exhibited by sneering at, and making nasty jokes about, “Abos”, “Chinks”, “Slopes”, “Wogs”, “Fags”, ”Spastics” and other MINORITY groups in society.”
The accepted social law is that majority groups can be picked on with impunity (which is bad news if you’re a white, straight male). So – since when were bogans in the minority, anywhere, these days? If it’s where you live, pray give the address and we’ll all move there.
On an interesting side note, one of the only remaining groups that thinks it is okay to make fun of all the races listed by Andrew is the bogans.
Phelpsy, is that you? I’m surprised you haven’t passed out from lack of oxygen, you’ve taken the moral high ground to x-tremes!
Brendan is right!
We should uncritically accept everything. Hooray for everything!
Hooray for mc mansions, Brendan Fevola, and our glorious victory at Gallipoli……. Hillsong forbid we should ever criticize anything.
Yes Andrew, we are all just JELUS H8TERS 2 THE XTREME ZOMG!!!1
Get over yourself.
Clearly a case of “political correctness gone mad”
You’ve missed the point in relation to the criticism.
A minority of people are fed up living in a country with no style, no elegance, plastic food, cheap crass television, uneducated and ignorant hoardes of people, a lack of art and/or sophisticated artistic culture, a young generation lacking manners, social graces and the inability to act with respect and civility, embarrassing hoardes of tourists who are slowly destroying the good name past generations of Australians created (especially in Europe), politicians without articulation, vision, leadership qualities or civil manners, an accent that is becomimg more and more common and crass as the ages pass, a society bent on avoiding class differentiation and therefore elitism that may propogate some culture, innovation and style, people who think ANZAC is a drunk fest, people who don’t realise that the ANZAC myth is just that – a myth, alchoholism, binge drinking, unsavory behaviour emanating from alcoholic abuse, the treatment of women as objects, the treatment of immigrants as criminals……I could go on forever……People on this site are having a laugh, yes, but they’re also FED UP WITH THE WAY THIS COUNTRY IS HEADING….WE ARE AN INTERNATIONAL EMBARRASSMENT!!!
Australia’s King Bogan for the 100th TBL. Awesome stuff.
Well the Melbournites are on holiday today but I think we Sydney people have some fine bogan sporting examples. Their group sex scandals put yours to shame (well one of them was a Novocastrian playing for a team from The Shire).
Funny how Bingle hasn’t had a paid job in 16 months and then this pic and a $200,000 scoop from WD follows a signing with Max. Top stuff.
Fev won’t be worried about XXXX being weak. Qld is the home of Bundy Rum:
“It’ll tan yer insides and grow hair on ya bum”
That Bundy is a gold label drink for bogans, Hideous stuff that it is. The pub near my new home tends to fill up with traditional bogans (mullets, flanelette etc) on a weekend and they honour them by serving that shite on tap. Terrible.
I had to drive out to Toowoomba for work last week. I drove past a pub on the highway which had a Big Bundy Bottle out the front (ie as in Big Banana Big)! The ultimate stop on the Big Bogan Road Trip! Imagine the hijinx ‘the Fevolution’ (for that is what the local papers and radio commentators are referring to him as) will get up to with a few Bundy’s under his Ed Hardy Shirt!
BTW Congraulations on 100 posts! Well done and I look forward to many, many more!
and he’s a Narre Warren boy
Awfully convenient that within a week of getting the widely respected Max Markson on as her agent there are nude photos ‘leaked’ by big bad Fev.. Fortunately for poor innocent Lara a number of trashy womens mags were there fighting for the right to comfort her.. You can’t help but feel that maybe this time poor Fev may actually be the victim… what goes around comes around??
if anyone had the ‘pleasure’ to read the ninemsn article on this ‘issue’ this morning would’ve been flabbergasted at the simpsons-esque commentary. “bingle bears her soul to woman’s day (who last week posted the nude photo on their magazine) about the embarrassment of the situation…”
how bogan! last week the magazine SHAMES her, and this week she’s bearing her soul (and that…) to the magazine. class.
Should be a short article, then! (he he, “article” :P)
You can’t be a victim of anything ever if you have bagged a 19 year old model and get paid 6 figures to kick/hit a ball around a park
Nice post guys. This guy has earned the titile of “King of the Bogans” and it will take a remarkable effort from anybody over a good period of time to steal that title away from him. He should get an Aussie Swazie tattoo on his forehead. I think the one elaboration I would have included in the post would have been in reference to the lovely Lara and her new spokesperson/manager and his reputation as manager of choice for all true bogans. Isn’t he the guy who took on Corey Worthington and the Chk Chk Boom girl as clients?
Atleast Harry M Miller has some competition now.
Surely Warney is king of the bogans even if he is a bit of a wascaly scamp!
There’s plenty of contenders though. What about Ben Cousins just to throw a name out there?
warnie, for all his bogan cred, is a once-in-a-lifetime spin bowler. as a cricketer, he is an all-time legend. fevola’s just a bogan with a massive ego…
and Warne isn’t?
Warne surely is another bogan with an ego – and has a wife who when she gets going is also very “en bogue”. She appeared on Dancing with the Psuedo Stars and was a feature story on ACA/TT many times..
They’re all worthy contenders but as the bogan is so in tune with the social misfits in their current folly, Warney and Cousins have dropped out of the spotlight which is no fun for the humble bogan. Fevola teaming up with team Bingle in the latest episode is pure GOLD!
warney is a grade A pants man as evidenced by his long …pants…
surely this must put him in the bogan hall of fame or is it shame?
Max Markson is an absolute leech on society. He is the bogan pupeteer, as far as I’m concerned. Has anyone who has ever signed with him lasted more than 15 mins in the public spotlight?
He specialises in ex reality TV personalities and tries to milk the last dregs from their infamy after they have already had their 15 minutes of Psuedo-fame.. Even if it was a bad news story on ACA/TT.
Gavin, I agree. In this case Fevola may be the victim of a publicity stunt but fair is fair – He’s put himself well and truly in the firing line. I can’t think of a more deserving innocent victim than Fevola.
From http://www.smh.com.au/sport/naked-truth-is-fev-has-hit-a-new-low-20100305-posj.html
Brendan Fevola. The case builds that if ever they hold the World Dickhead Championships, he should be the Australian pick to go for gold.
And although this is from the herald sun, I thought it was a good article on what the Bungle has or has not done over the years
http://www.heraldsun.com.au/entertainment/confidential/where-the-bloody-hell-did-brand-bingle-go-wrong/story-e6frf96o-1225837508216
i was going to ask why an nrl player wasn’t chosen to have their own entry – but then thought about it and realised that they are all equally bogan, whereas fevola does stand out as some sort of perverse bogan shining light in the afl.
I do beleive a young fellow by the name of Todd Carney would have been one to rival Fevola a year or so ago. We all eagerly await the next Carney installment however he may have learnt something from his yr in exile. It would probably help Fevola to be ostrasised from the AFL community for a season too, then maybe he’d think twice before the next stunt.
As a proud Novocastrian I can’t wait to see what our fine selection of new age bogans (the Knights) get caught doing next.. Newcastle as a whole has to be edging closer to its own entry
excuse my southern ignorance, but is he the one who got “justify your existAnce’ tattooed on his chest, all “my brother’s keeper” style?
Nope.. Unfortunately there are many more where Fevola came from. The one you refer to is a NRL player for the Penrith (Prime Bogan Terrain) Panthers..
No. But he has adorned his body with multiple tattoos to celebrate his individualism.
Carney has a long and hilarious rap sheet
– Was involved in a mans buttocks being set alight during 2009 new years celebrations
– Banned from the southern NSW town of Goulborn.
– Had his 400k a year NRL contract torn up because he refused to give up alcohol.
– Urinated on a mans head in a Canberra club.
– Led Canberra police on a car chase through Canberra streets before alighting his vehicle and running back to his mum’s house.
– Multiple drink driving offenses including being arrested performing doughnuts in his car while under the influence.
He is the bogans bogan.
I remember the collective sigh of relief once he left Canberra.
Smell like cabbage. Small hands.
I swear Brendan Fevola and Willie Mason are one in the same
it’s no co-incidence they both now ply their trade in the same state, with Mason now at North Queensland Cowboys
I used to work on a helpdesk a few yrs ago and i kid you not, every time there was a caller on the line that seemed too stupid to be a legitimate caller, I would look at my screen and almost 100% of the time the number had a (07) prefix. Scary place Queensland.
Yup, most things you hear about Qlders are true. It’s not uncommon to find a Qlder in their early 20’s who has never been outside of the state. And if you read The Courier Mail it’s difficult to know whether to laugh out loud or cry in the name of common sense- especially around Origin time!
As for bogans in the AFL versus bogans in the NRL, it’s about the same, as much as the AFL types (Victorians) want to claim the moral high ground. A lot of stuff that happens off field in the AFL gets swept under the carpet, while if an NRL player farts it’s front page news in the News Ltd. press.
“Yup, most things you hear about Qlders are true. It’s not uncommon to find a Qlder in their early 20’s who has never been outside of the state.”
Funny you should say that – in my experience (on the Gold Coast) it’s not uncommon to find a “Queenslander” who is actually from NSW or Vic but who is doing a wonderful job assisting in the bad reputation of Queenslanders… Living here and being from here are definitely two different things.
I think a little told secret is that the great southerm migration to Queensland over the last 20 years has been among white-flight bogans looking for cheaper housing.
Often those who had little success in their home towns… The quality of people overall isn’t improving with this migration…
I lived on the Gold Coast for a year and I agree that there are a lot of NAB’s there. North of Beenleigh though is where you start to encounter some real bogan material though!
Mezz scary in lots of ways.
just out of high school(admit its a while ago) meand mate hitche round most of Australia and whereever we went we were treated fairly by police and on a number of occasions given helf including on at least three occasions in extrreeme inclement weather use of a cell for the night and a lift to a servo the next morning ,even something to eat on two occasions.
All except Queensland. “move on”,off the road”, ‘where you from”Show us ID”, ” parents phone number then wait while they check with home”.
We had our packs tossed three times going from one side of Townsville to the other.
Then years later Joh and the state of emergency about tje Springbock tour!!
Grrrrrrrrrrrr
Hahaha, JH! Are you sure your treatment there wasn’t more of a reflection on you? Certainly sounds like you appeared to be vagabonds!
Yeah, they don’t like folk from “outta town” in QLD.. Kind of matches a few descriptions of some southern states in the USA. It’s almost as if they want to avoid having any chlorine added to their local gene pool..
They call it “The Deep North” for a reason. As the old joke goes, what’s the difference between a Qlder and a tub of yoghurt?
The tub of yoghurt has got more culture!
And those from Southern States probably had a leg to stand on before the Cronulla Riots and the latest round of Indian Bashings.
and flourine, nasty stuff, stops your kids teeth rotting naturally,naturally
Correct, JH! We have it in the water now but there are plenty of angry parents who would prefer it wasn’t. “Have another cup of Coke with your McNuggets dinner, Shaniyah, safer than that nasty water!”
I was given fluoride tablets growing up and am yet to require a single filling or any other dental work at 30… I may get Alzheimer’s one day but my teeth are beautiful one day and perfect the next! ;)
Now, was I about to glass a cunt or did I already do it?
yep, me sixtythree and asside from wisdom teeth and one center bottom, all removed because of lack of room, have all my own teeth and only four(Ithink) fillings. we didnt have flouride in town water then but my parents had my teeth flouride painted regularly according to some schedule and then later when we lived out bush we all had flouride tablets to take.
I am gratefull for it ,thats for sure. and dispite my typos are still as sharp as Fiona!
Well , mostly.
heehee JH – I do enjoy reading your comments – even if they are contributing measurably to my wrinkled brow!
How old do you imagine Your Fiona to be?
Well AlyssaKT,
You know real ladies never tell and their age is one of the things they never tell about !
Even if I knew for sure as a gentleman ,though by Fi’s standards I am not of sufficient substance to qualify as “a gentleman and a man of substance”I am honour bound not to divulge.
F.Y.I.
Back when Fi and I were still kiddies at the knees of our nurses a man of substance had at least two thousand Pounds a year.
How quaint!
Beyond gold! How considerate of Mr. Fevola to bring us the Bingle Bungle just in time to add weight to this already momentous post. Impeccable timing! Are you guys in cahoots with Max Markson too?:D
I know – It’s as if all the stars aligned for TBL – I like it!
Now all we need is for him to announce his involvement in the next Dancing with the (Non) Stars or (not) Celebrity Big Brother via his new manager Max Markson for us to take things to the next level.. On that note, Shouldn’t he be spelling his surname MARXON to honour his roots?
Marx Bros more likely
ma-X marX-on. OK that is just ridiculous. Can I also say, Andrew, I like you, your lack of comprehension, understanding of satire and irony gives me hope for my own failings, those which I no doubt exacerbate during my condemnation and judgment of wogs, abos/coons, chinks (I am brave enough to not use “-“) and, of course, bogans. Your vitriolic response had me thinking you could possibly be the alter ego of the afore mentioned Mr. Fevola, but then I realised, cogent sentences and arguments are far from his capabilities and he hides this inadequacy by marking his territory in public spaces and wearing a strap on, maybe something you, or rather your partner, are also familiar with?
oh god I made a gay suggestion, how bogan
You should have asked Andrew if he likes rough trade. Methinks probably so.
It wasn’t really gay, per se, as you implied his partner would require a strap-on. But you definitely implied he was more than just an arse.
any one who has followed fev’s career closely will know of the following story. then coach, wayne britain, was on the verge of delisting fev (early 2000s, maybe around 2001 0r 2002) for his poor attitude and behaviour. anyway, as history will show, wayne britain was given the arse before he had the chance to formally axe fev. anyway, before britain was fired, he sat down with fev, and had a heart-to-heart, man-to-man with the then young forward. the story goes that britain was going to try and get fev a job — through a friend with connections — as a garbo. you know the type, 6 am, hanging off the back of a tip truck. wayne britain seriously thought this was the ONLY other thing fev could do as a career, from the guy who’d coached him over the last 4+ years…
why the fev,s get paid exhuberant wages will always confuse myself,But one day i will praise his fall from grace.i was hoping that #100 was going to include the cheap,inferior chinese products the bogan purchases eg;pitbikes/safety equiptment an alas bunnings products
because he can kick one hundred goals in a season,he may be a total goose but he knows his craft(goal-kicking),a skill very rare in todays AFL.Also he,s very media savvy ,hav’nt you heard him on triple m.
I was thinking UFC or Danoz Direct for #100 but who can argue the merit of the Fevola post as a monumental hundredth??
Danoz direct would be good but why not “Infomercials” gererally”
They are afterall a major source of technical information for bogans and a fabulous source of overpriced chinese junk which the bogans describe as “must have bargains” !
Watching thirty seconds of “The Morning Show” is like having a lobotomy.
Brought up because of the mention of infomercials. Those shows are basically extended infomercials.
Typical bogan “it’s only a bit of fun”. Don’t play along and you’re somehow the bad guy.
Everyone here has seen Trent from Punchy right? I only just found this website yesterday but there’s GOTTA’ be an entry on him, he’s the most hilarious examples of the fauna we so adore to laugh at in this country.
Those two links for those who haven’t seen it, this kid is just a-mazing.
I’d suggest it’s infinitely more bogan to be a fan of Trent from Punchy than to be Trent himself.
Any chance of doing a piece on fellow tiprats Willie Mason and Andrew Symonds? Every code/sport has their resident wanker.
Symonds is far less of a bogan than Lara Bungle’s current ride
Thanks TNL for 100 great posts and a lot of fun. Long weekend here in SA so have been out enjoying life and bogan spotting.
A week end at Elizabeth?
That would be for bogan v1.0.
Not NAB.
I guess futures + adelaide cup provided ample opportunity.
PS best bogan watching in Adelaide = eastern suburbs. CUBs. I should know, I am from there (however it is worth noting that I am one of the old school Burnside snobs and can’t stand my beautiful suburb being infiltrated by the nouveau riche)
haha, an Adelaide snob. You are too much.
Any Darwin snobs out there?
Funny you should mention that. The offspring of Darwin snobs can be found in Adelaidean boarding schools.
Dear Me,
I also live in Burnside and whole heartedly agree. I actually went to Glenelg for my bogan spotting.
If you want to do some bogan spotting in Adelaide and you can cope with the creepy Truman Show vibe, you need look no further than Mawson Lakes.
To dismiss what Fevola did to Lara Bingle as a ‘bungle’, a piece of frivolity, is to belittle the importance of the right to privacy. Sure, Lara makes her living as a model, but when she does SHE GIVES HER CONSENT. Don’t dismiss Fevola’s passing around of a photo he took without her consent, spread without her consent and in fact told her he had deleted it, as a mere bit of fun. Its a breach of her human rights. We should be condemning Fevola for his actions and lack of public apology.
Agreed.
But keep in mind this is a frivolous kind of site. Don’t take it too seriously.
Also, nobody here is blameless – including those of us who provide the audience for this trash.
By trash – I mean the gossip in the papers.
Not TBL :-)
Jodes, do you know anything? Once you send something by email or text, it’s in the hands of the gods. Maybe Fev passed it to one person only and then deleted it. Not that I’m defending him, he looks the type to forward it to everyone including his mum. But it was 4 years ago and suddenly (coincidentally just after LB gets a new gutter-rat manager) it’s front page news and she gets half an Aston Martin in wages for a half-page poor-me piece (no doubt with some classy glamour photo) from the very magazine that (re)broke the story of her affair with a married man (and she knew he was married).
LOL – you all laugh at “bogans” because they apparently like this Brendan Fevola person (whoever the fuck he is), but you all seem to have a lot to say about him.
So, if liking Brendan Fevola and following ever step in his career means you’re a “Bogan”, guess what – you’re all a bunch of “Bogans”!! And yet you don’t like “Bogans”!. Which makes you a bunch of idiots – well done!!
You fucking losers…
lighten up an learn how to use spellcheck,You nieve/angry obvious bogan.
I very cleverly picked up your intentional spelling error there, common man. well done ;)
Korubell
Love you,love your work
Mwah
I’m sorry I went to the trouble of a formalish response to your earlier post.
You’ve told others to take a hard look at themselves? Are you holding yourself up as an example of who you would have us emulate?
You’ve severely undermined whatever tenuous position you thought you had.
Seriously lame response dude, almost as bad “common man” whose idea of a good come back it to yell “Bogan” at someone when he’s feeling a bit confused / out of his depth…
Wow – for a bunch of superior types who think you’re better than “Bogans”, you people are seriously stupid….
Ahhh, I see. You’re a troll.
I’ll leave you be.
Wow, another good come back!! I’m speechless…
Andrew, It’s called SATIRE. Now go away and look it up.
so basically what you’re saying, andrew, is that because we are aware of who brendan fevola is and the moronic things he’s done that we’re idiots? how exactly does that make sense. there is a big difference between being aware of someone and liking them – i’m aware of miley cyrus and the jonas brothers (wish i wasn’t) but being aware of or having an opinion about someone is not the same thing as liking them. you seem to lack the knowledge of the differences.
Is there such a thing as a knuckle dragging tiprat? Oh hello Favola! I didn’t see you there spooooose your gunna glass me now? hahahah Or should I speak say you can understand…. spoze ya gunna glarse moy now to show youse a maaan….
Aaah The Tiprat.
Fevola was responsible for a bogan crime not mentioned. White-boy, bogan dreadlocks. Perfect for the bogan – no need to wash hair, look extreme and individuality by comformity. If your dreads stop you from being admitted to a golf course, nice restaurant or wedding photo, the bogan can proudly yell in their direction that “you dont get me because I am too real!! These dreads mean I am real!” Fev got his dreads about 5 years after surfing tragics ruined them forever.
James Hunter, your posts are very epigramatic today. Bit of a senior moment, pops?
So is Fiona.
Is it possible that these two are actually the same person?
No, I’m sure that ‘Fiona’ and ‘Andrew’ are the same person.
LOL.wrong fi has never been that crude, i believe andrew is aka darren j hodges a spokesman for the aap party who runs the fb group (fuck off were full vs6), Who still use,s the term “wtf” an claims the term bogan is a pejorative to all australians whilst oppresing an blocking anyone that does not agree with his nieve brainwashing ways.Trust me an 5 others that have been blocked that enjoyed the 3 mintues of aka poking his site hahaha
common man,
dont know what your on but can I have some?
LOL. You need LESS of what he’s on, not more!
Ah,Thank you Fi.
Maybe I should stick to the Meths?
Benjamin,
surely you are not infering that Our dear Fi and I are one and the same?
Oh shame on you. Just because Fi and I have more than a few things in common, fine wine and food and a love for the arts for starters in no way should it be taken as evidence that Fi and I share the same roof over our heads nor share our bodies.(the briefest of intimate interludes asside).
I doubt that Fi will grace you with a response to this monsterous assertion but if sh does I am sure she will refute it as vigerously as I.
LOL. I assure you, we are NOT the same person.
Thank you Fiona,
Your confidence in that simple statement inspires me.
MWAH
Fiona , such restraint, definetly a sign of good breeding
A very sad,but quite plausable scenario.
Peter, Being Epigrammatic or brusque by nature I would probably have said succinct ! If you excuse the tautology and get my disambiguation !! ?
Sorry Peter
sometimes my repartee gets in front of my mouth! or is it brain?
Truth is I have been in and out toing and froing to the John Hunter Hospita all day and have not devoted the time required to read all the bloggs.
Did notice, not much from Fi today ? of course Fi is also often short and to the point (as she sees it). Simon also has not had a lot to say today.
Do you think I have anything to worry about ??
You don’t think, Simon and Fi??
Nah ‘course not sorry to have mentioned it .
Still……..
Sorry to disappoint you James but it was a long weekend in SA and I was out and about.
Hope ypou were not out dinning Outdoors on the sidewalk cafe at Mosquito Lakes? Oops, Mawson Lakes ?
“This proved the final straw for Carlton, who shipped him off to the state that brought us Barnaby Joyce and the 3 Park Superpass.”
Let’s not forget the 25% of inhabitants who once voted for Pauline Hanson
Or the fact that 1000 Victorians move up there every week…..
FACT
this might be the only way that fev gets to a ton
probably only way he gets to 100 doing pushups ??
@ANDREW depth?did you not read about your coffee cup being half full/half empty, You seem to be very confused about many things including the hands people play eg;entrapment/comedy/stupidty all in the name of fun hence your epic failure in understanding an educated explanation and dumbing one,s self down to common swear words that labelled yourself a bogan an not worthy of proper responses. ps hook line an sinker im sure you,ll understand before satire obviously.
Very enjoyable article but I particularly loved the last para. Fevola stands annhilated.
Fantastic for #100 – this combines all the elements of boganality that is infecting the Australian landscape-
– idolised sports star revered for being able to kick a ball and drink their own body weight in beer, while cross dressing,
– aspiring model looking for fame and fortune with the least mental effort, the anti-intellectual way, thinking they deserve it due to the way they look,
– ex – boyfriend with misspelt tribal tattoo, about to move to that bogan nirvana Cronulla,
– the whole affair played out in the bogan bible of New Idea ,the lifestyle print version of TT.
Bogan Royality – won’t be long for the tell all story on ACA (with appearance fee of course)
Plus what were his team mates thinking, definitely not “put that phone away dickhead, we don’t want to see a degrading photo like that, think of her feelings”.
Q: How can you tell a spokesman for a football club is lying?
A: When they begin a sentence with ” we take allegations of the mistreatment of women seriously”.
You’re onto it, 86!
I’d call myself 99 but haven’t thought of her the same way since seeing Barbara Feldon in a dubbed film whilst in Germany – “nien! nien!” panicked, the characters shouted repeatedly at her character… as we chorused “nien! nien! Ninety-nine!” at the screen.
Also, I think No Idea magazine far surpasses T/T in the garbage stakes. Gasp!
wrong
you can tell when they are lying much more easily
whenever their mouth is moving…?
Wogans support carlton but bogans support collingwood.
Was away for the long weekend…
(another Thing that Bogans Like) wakeboarding and jetskiing up the murray river… so missed this one yesterday…
Epic 100th post TBL… great work…
I don’t have a boat, so I just poured a couple of tanks of oil and petrol into the river so that I get to have some fun too.
Midstrength my ass!!!! XXXX is 4.6%. You can still get VB here too but its bloody awful!!!
We were referring to XXXX Gold, which at 3.5% alcohol, is the highest selling Queensland beer. TBL
I wondered that too, Adrian. Apparently they think all there is to drink is XXXX Gold up here. NaBs drink Coronas anyway…
Locally brewed Coronas, of course.
do they still drink from those ponsey little beer glasses up there?
In QLD, you would have been glassed with a poncy little glass for that JH.
Quite right! Yes, we still have ‘poncy’ ‘Pot Glasses’ (because of the heat) but since the legalisation of poker machines in Qld most licensed venues can afford and have installed air conditioning – allowing us to upgrade to Schooners/ Shmiddies and even the grand Pint (you can really glass a cunt good with those beauties).
I had the misfortune to live in QLD for 2 years, Rockhampton in particular and ALL the Queensland jokes are true. Good god they are a backwards lot. And this coming from someone who lives in Adelaide.
ah yes, those are the ‘real Queenslanders” up there. Not many NaBs in that lot. God’s country. The land that time forgot.
Did you know that Rocky has the highest ratio of fast food outlets to head of population in Australia. And also the countries highest percentage of Obese people. You can smell the fat frying as you drive into town (that, also is very true).
ah yes, charming place. Drove through it whilst on the XXXX Qld Variety Bash in 2007. Ha
And Gladstone makes Rocky look cultured aye.
Try Toowoomba. Makes Gladstone look like Oxford.
My wife lived there for a while in school years and still shudders when it is mentioned. 2 hours up the road and 20 years back in time.
LOL. I thought it was 7 hours and 20 years. Of course, I’m talking about Adelaide.
Sadly, you thought wrong. And we were getting on so well.
except the pubs do not have the style or the pork pies
were you in the military?
only because that’s all we can be trusted with at the footy/cricket/tennis/bowls club/school these days. haha
Congrats on #100.
I reckon you could have had an entry for the entire AFL competition and all who attend matches on a regular basis.
Hmmm, good dig at the Fev – he is a champion bogue – but i still think the northern states take the cake with League boys. Fev may have urinated on a bar but as mentioned above Todd Carny urinated on a mans head.
A MANS HEAD!!!
Sam Newman is a dickhead, sure, but the entire NRL footy show panel are knuckle dragging mouth breathers. And didn’t Greg Bird actually glass his girlfriend? You guys should find a source north of the border to contribute to sporting boganity cataloging – Rugby League trumps AFL in that regard i believe.
One of the blog authors moved from Melbourne to Sydney last week. He has been tasked with gaining first-hand insight into the NSW bogan. TBL
I agree Faux. League does take the cake on the Bogan-o-meter and needs it’s own entry.
Jesus, you really don’t like him do you.
Aw bless, this one’s a classic: “boganic behaviour”. I hope it makes the Macquarie dictionary next year!
Fevola’s a classic case of the Boganic jawline – the bigger the jaw, the smaller the brain.
Anyone else thinking maybe Andrew is Eddie Maguire (I don’t even know how to spell his name!) Who ever Andrew is, let’s glass the c*nt.
I don’t wish to cast nasturtiums, but is Lara Bingle not an utter fembogue?
1. No matter how you dress her up, you can’t take her out
2. She’s adept at getting the kit off
3. I’ve a shiny penny that says she’s sporting a little ink somewhere
4. She appears to think others are not only interested in what she has to say, but willing to pay to hear her pearls of wisdom
5. She’s orange.
The prosecution rests…
Tombarina, for all intensive purposes, I believe you would be correct :)
Hel, what pacifically are you incinerating? Although, as an infernal optimist, I’m off to have a nice mug of depaticated coffee.
Not really sure, it is beyond my apprehension, I generally get channel vision on topics like this.
very enjoyable!
I wonder if Andrew liked it? Clearly he is a man of great statue.
he’s clearly under no allusions…
(that was tougher to come up with than you two made it look!)
You need to keep up with these things AlyssaKT! You know what they say, a rolling stone gathers no moths
True – and I believe we’ve only just scratched the surfers
AH! Toupe!
AlyssaKT
Remember ,” If you tell the truth you are bound sooner or later to be found out “!(Oscar Wilde)
best to never cut your nose off despite your face, JH
that’s a ten
The fake spray on tan yet another boganista determinator
I am waiting for the ultimate TBL post about…… Things Bogans Like! Give it a real Bunuelesque feel!
AlyssaKT,
That’s another ten !
yes, definately unparalyzed in TBL comment history
Don’t throw the baby out with the ditchwater.
Admiral qualities to some, yet leaving others fumigated.
Sorry AlyssaKT, I don’t quite reprehend what you’re on about there.
Guys, we are flogging a dead Porche here, very bogan……….
Where some finish other bogan.
HA! Bogan is as bogan does
*takes off Ed Hardy hat to Simon*
*glass*
A fitting end to a bicycle discussion
Hel,
we need a comment from Fi as she is our MelbourneStar
No, I am sure she has illiterated our bramblings from her field of view
Perhaps to all infants and porpises we are dead to her.
Without a debt Simon, without a debt.
I’m so very, very sorry for starting this.
I simply wished to propose La Bingle for immediate elevation to Boganhood on the basis of her kit-off tendencies, general inanity and fetching tangerine hue.
As Dog is my witless, that’s all I intrended. Instead, people are carrying on like headless chooks, behaving historically.
But now it’s all a bit repetitive and monogamous – getting dull, and no longer simulating.
So in other words, it is a brilliant analogy for the Lara Bingle situation? We are just social commoditators!
Malvernstar was a bike sorry it from outside your chronology
James, Malvern Stars are making a comeback currently. I had a dragster when young. It was very cool.
I too knew what they were… it just didn’t go with the rest of the lines, JH : )
as Ogre once said-“NERDS”
More nastershians Hel.
To reticulate one final time, bogans
i loves when you coo those big words hel
use r all awsum aye?
True story:
My friends mother was sent a letter regarding her mother in a nursing home and the fees going up. It was concluded with “Sorry for any incontinence caused.”
whose incontinence, though?
Well that’s the thing – it couldn’t have been a more inappropriate error – and yet entirely suitable…
“howls of derisive laughter Bruce.”
I know next to nothing about Bogan’s Ballet and the boganic ballerinas therein. As far as I can tell, though, this particular bogue, Fev, is about as boganic as they come.
And on the topic of Bogan’s Ballet, you guys really should do an article on Eddie Everywhere. CUB if e’er there was one, and it’s been my observation that bogans love him.
I concur.
Eddie, the lobotomised tools from The Footy Show, and anyone associated with the bogan’s soon-to-be must-watch TV program, The Matty Johns Show.
Oh, the humanity….
Hear, hear, Tombarina!
Oh, it has been reported in the meeja that Mr Fevola has a wee gambling problem, to the tune of a quarter of a mil.
Who knew, eh? Surely! Not a bogue with an inappropriate gaming addiction! Draws in sharp breath!
His embarrassing antics at the Brownlow were after numerous hours on the table at Crown with another AFL player/somebody.
For as long as they all earn what they do and think they are who they think they are, there will never be any shortage of sportsmen with “gambling addictions” et al…
And now he’s going to lose his McMansion, by the sounds of it.
Call it schadenfreude, but I get inestimable pleasure out of seeing bogan thugs like him get the world handed to them only to piss it all down the drain due to their own stupidity and arrogance.
he doesn’t play AFL, he plays Australian Rules (also known in you beaut aussie sland as Aussie Rules). Most bogans can’t tell the difference, because most bogans can’t remember last weekend, let alone the 80s. It’s like saying Messi plays La Liga, or FIFA instead of soccer/football/association football
Heh. Well considering the AFL is the ONLY australian football league in the world, you might as well say AFL…
True – he plays FOR the AFL, playing Aussie Rules.
for now, anyway.