#253 – Fifty Shades of Grey
#252 – Tom Waterhouse
#251 – Gates
#250 – Donald Trump
#249 – Pauline Hanson
#248 – Bashing Hippie Skulls
#247 – Gig Photography
#246 – Tax Refunds
#245 – The Makers of ‘The Hangover’
#244 – Low Interest Rates
#243 – Perspective-Based Photography at Famous Landmarks
#242 – Playing The Markets
#241 – Theatre Restaurants
#240 – Cruise Ships
#239 – Talking About Joining the Army
#238 – The Australian Dollar
#237 – Conspiracy Theories
#236 – Sex Addiction
#235 – WAGs
#234 – Fender Stratocasters
#233 – Schadenfreude
#232 – Bundaberg Rum
#231 – Shock Jocks
#230 – Cross-Promotions
#229 – Your Favourite Bar
#228 – Doing it Wrong
#227 – Banks
#226 – Cougars
#225 – Massive Prams
#224 – Zara
#223 – Meat Lovers’ Pizzas
#222 – Walking Between Train Carriages
#221 – Baptisms
#220 – Richard Mercer
#219 – Online Binary Polls
#218 – Mexican Beer
#217 – Driving Like a Fucking Idiot
#216 – The Real World
#215 – Franchises
#214 – Complaining About Facebook
#213 – Other People’s Backyards
#212 – Buying Australian Made
#211 – Foxtel
#210 – Manly Diet Cola
#209 – Tiffany & Co.
#208 – Platinum
#207 – Cheap Petrol
#206 – New Year’s Resolution
#205 – Dickileaks
#204 – Curtis Stone
#203 – Being Smart
#202 – Gerry Harvey
#201 – Palazzo Versace Australia
#200 – Shane Warne
#199 – Decrying Corrupt FIFA Executives
#198 – Losing Weight for Summer
#197 – Toolies
#196 – Farewell Tours
#195 – Impersonating someone who impersonated someone who impersonated Mark Read
#194 – Bandwagons
#193 – Bootcamp
#192 – Theoretical Cunnilingus (V-lick)
#190 – Movember
#189 – Jersey Shore
#188 – Our Ava Sydney Hewitt
#187 – Fascinators
#186 – Sporting Memorabilia
#185 – History
#184 – Ducks
#183 – Catholicism
#182 – Lance Armstrong
#181 – Sarcasm
#180 – Footy Trips
#179 – Tradies
#178 – Certainty
#177 – Carbon Offsets
#176 – Zumba
#175 – Car Parks
#174 – Pyramids
#173 – Police Procedurals
#172 – Unsolicited Music Requests
#171 – Being a Pro Photographer
#170 – Michael Bublé
#169 – Mild Curries
#168 – Brazil
#167 – DFO
#166 – Morning Television
#165 – Sequels
#164 – Full-Body Rigidity
#163 – Executive Consultant Account Coordination Management
#161 – The Brisbane Broncos
#160 – EmotionDrums™
#159 – Australia’s First Female Prime Minister
#158 – Party Buses
#157 – Paintball
#156 – All Things Fast and/or Furious
#155 – Krispy Kreme
#154 – Coloured Ribbons
#153 – The Casino
#152 – Nutri Grain
#151 – Clashing With Reporters
#150 – Ned Kelly
#149 – Homophobia
#148 – Wii Fit
#147 – Wine Tours
#146 – Our Sam Stosur
#145 – Hot Asian Chicks
#144 – Home Fitness Equipment
#143 – David Guetta
#142 – Buying a Snowboard
#141 – Suiting Up
#140 – Ill-Informed Analysis of the Qu’ran
#139 – Bear Grylls
#138 – The Third Dimension!
#137 – Their Taxpayer Dollars
#136 – Foreign Tattoos
#135 – The Logies
#134 – Pre-Mixed Drinks
#133 – Celebrities’ Opinions
#132 – Aussie Hip Hop
#131 – Short Courses
#130 – Celebrity Fragrances
#129 – Power Balance Bands
#128 – Scapegoats
#127 – Slater and Gordon
#126 – Hey, Hey It’s Saturday
#125 – IKEA
#124 – Anal
#123 – Indie Rock Choruses
#122 – Ernie Dingo
#121 – The Lynx Effect
#120 – Forgiving Celebrities
#119 – April Fool’s Day
#118 – Vampires
#117 – Pandora Bracelets
#116 – Doing their back in
#115 – Moët Hennessy Louis Vuitton
#114 – Delta Goodrem
#113 – Shaolin Warrior Monks
#112 – Mobs
#111 – Zoo Weekly
#110 – ADHD
#109 – ‘Rock the Ballet’
#108 – Two and a Half Men
#107 – St Patrick’s Day
#106 – Mixed Martial Arts
#105 – Plus-Size Models
#104 – Road Rage
#103 – Max Markson
#102 – Red Carpet Specials
#101 – A Current Affair
#100 – Brendan Fevola
#99 – Today/Tonight
#98 – Doing as Simon Says
#97 – Anti-intellectualism
#96 – Late Night Logistics
#95 – Freedom of Speech
#94 – P!nk
#93 – Spurious Allergies
#92 – News Limited
#91 – Reality TV
#90 – Baby (brand)
#89 – Their Children on Facebook
#88 – Premium SMS Services
#87 – La Porchetta’s
#86 – Melanin
#85 – Residential Property Investment
#84 – SMS Speak
#83 – Twenty/Twenty Cricket
#82 – Nike Shoxmax
#81 – Ministry of Sound
#80 – Fashion Statements
#79 – Big Things
#78 – André Rieu
#77 – Poker Nights
#76 – McMansions
#75 – Velvet Ropes
#74 – Border Security: Australia’s Front Line
#73 – Paper Planes
#72 – X
#71 – Overseas Day
#70 – Tennis
#69 – Megachurches
#68 – Functional Water
#67 – Southern Cross Tattoos
#66 – Glassing Cunts
#65 – Frangipani Stickers
#64 – Guitar Hero
#63 – Formal Living Areas
#62 – Sarah Jessica Parker
#61 – (Even More) Ed Hardy
#60 – Going to Work in the Mines
#59 – Joining Moronic Facebook Groups
#58 – Hugh Hefner
#57 – New Year’s Eve
#56 – Post-Christmas Sales
#55 – Chrisco
#54 – Thailand
#53 – Their Pre-baby Weight
#52 – Telethons
#51 – Tribal Tattoos
#50 – Discount Airlines
#49 – Faux Lesbianism
#48 – The Corbys
#47 – “Fuck Off, We’re Full” Stickers
#46 – Weddings: Photos
#45 – Weddings: Her Big Day
#44 – Weddings: The Buck’s/The Hen’s
#43 – Weddings: The Preparations
#42 – Weddings: The Courtship
#41 – Kings of Leon
#40 – Commercial Radio
#39 – “Political Correctness Gone Mad”
#38 – Finding God
#37 – The Secret
#36 – Self Help Books
#35 – Puppetry of the Penis
#34 – Sexpo
#33 – The Australian Victory at Gallipoli
#32 – Glamour Photography
#31 – Couture
#30 – Fad Diets
#29 – 3-Park Superpass!
#28 – “Holdens”
#27 – Rove
#26 – Malapropisms
#25 – Voting
#24 – Underbelly
#23 – Locally Produced, Foreign Label Beer
#22 – Cover Bands
#21 – Massive Cans
#20 – Painting
#19 – Killing Things
#18 – Petrol Consumption as Recreation
#17 – The Melbourne Cup
#16 – Uninformed Gambling
#15 – Personalised Numberplates
#14 – Sexualising Their Children
#13 – Misspelling Their Kids’ Names
#12 – Christian Audigier
#11 – Ruining Music Festivals
#10 – Last Year’s Designer Drug
#9 – Getting Huge
#8 – Contiki Tours
#7 – Books; After the Film Release
#6 – Prefacing Racist Statements With “I’m not racist but…’
#5 – Boost Juice
#4 – No Deposit, No Interest, No Repayments for 18 Months!
#3 – Tramp Stamps
#2 – Buddhist Iconography as Home Furnishings
#1 – Arbitrary Thievery
our own Oss bogans in Government House !!!
Crown Princess Mary of Denmark meets pretty much all the criteria!
Anything from Tasmania is a bogan.
That is so true. in Tassie the cops are bogans, the politicians are bogans, everyones mum and dad is a bogan, school teachers – its true, everything in Tassie is a bogan
How about cheap beer? They’re loving the new Maxx Blonde and also now Maxx Dry with a free Baggy Green Ashes cap….
Bogans love watching gameshows that require absolutely no skill.
They believe that games like ‘Deal or No Deal’ do in fact require a great deal of skill, such as knowing whether or nor to trust in your ‘instinct’. They also put great faith in what complete strangers ‘feel’ are in their cases. They believe they can master the game in much the same way they can master Poker Machines.
Bogans also love this show for its use of the sound ‘Booyah!’ which many have appropriated to express joy in their daily lives.
Oh my god, yes! Deal or No Deal is the single most ridiculous spectacle on television. All the contestants preface their answers with ‘I think I have…’. NO. You don’t THINK, you GUESS! You cannot think, that requires logical reasoning which cannot be done in this game beyond not saying the numbers that have already been chosen. There is no thinking, and therefore no skill involved!
YES this is amazing
Area blogger demands a post about bogan’s over-reliant love of the exclamation mark and or speaking verbally in text speak.
Wait – I just saw that you did text speak as SMS speak.
So, basically, in one way or another, everyone is a bogan… Except people who waste their lives playing video games, and homosexuals who waste their lives playing video games…
Whoever wrote this, well done on being too supressed to function on any level. Clearly, you are anti-exercise, anti-alcohol, anti-going outdoors, anti-travel, anti-contribution, anti-sex, anti-sports, etc. Or maybe these are just things you have discovered you are no good at, and therefore, in a lame, nerdy, and complete fail effort to substantiate yourself as superior in some way, shape or form, you spent hours writing this massive piece of fail.
I couldn’t help but notice, World of Warcraft isn’t in the list. Ironic really.
And what pray tell does “World of Warcraft ” have to do with the realities of life?
I agree with Matty. It also seems that you’re a bogan if you like anything or dislike people who dislike anything. So what country is this ‘creator of bogan identification’ from? My thoughts on this website is Epic Fail!
God, I agree! To be honest, I’ve looked through this site’s criteria for boganism and I have to say that Australian citizenship is sufficient to guarantee it. If you are an Australian then you are certainly a bogan….
Matty, don’t try and sound as un-bogan as you can with your big words and complex thoughts. It’s just a joke. Have a laugh and move on.
Get. A. Life.
Well said Matty. I just went through the list and yep, I totally agree with your comment. Im a surfer that lives at Narrabeen and I love Ed Hardy.
Yes. Because you’re a bogan.
well stated argument, however, if this is a list of your entire life, or the only things you think actually happen on Earth… ehhh sorry, it’s obviously not your fault, but you are a bogan :(
Tom, Matty is a bogan from way back and preforms his duty of entertaining the troups to perfection
You should re-title the list to “things that people who I am intimidated by, and feel inferior to, like”.
Is that how you measure greatness Matty? By being able to impress people with your awesomeness? That could well be another definition of a bogan.
No, it’s not about being intimidated…it’s about pointing and laughing at the mediocrity that so many out there confuse as success.
I think I smell a bogan……
who’d be intimidated by people who struggle with stringing together full sentences? who’d be intimidated by bedazzled ed hardy shirts? and who would be intimidated by someone with the numberplate ‘drlovn’?
You’re right I am often intimidated by deranged meatheads. Certainly don’t feel inferior though, very, very, very superior.
So I see it’s the bogans who react in defence to this list, the rest of us laugh ;-)
Kayaks …. bogans go crazy for a bit of Kayaking …. or anything else you can buy from BCF
A Fair Go.
Bogans love the concept of “A Fair Go”. The rough translation to intellectual english language is “the government owes me a living”.
The Fair Go, of course, being restricted to white Ozzie bogans.
The idea that immigants or homos or reffos or that should get a fair go? Nah.
“From each according to his capacity and to each according to his need ” (Karl Marx)
“Do unto others as you would have them do unto you ” (The Golden rule as found in the Christian Bible and as is found in various religions back to antiquity.)
Just think if we all followed this advice the Bogan alnong with the rest of us would have nothing to complain about.
Instead we live in a rampantly capitalist society where the rule appears to be ” Screw everyone before they can screw you” No wonder we are all a lot of sick puppies.
I think Bogans assassinated JFK, James.
As soon as the Bogan heard “ask not what your Country can do for you, but what you can do for your Country..” the Bogans hired Lee Harvey Oswald and the rest is history.
My point is that a Bogan has an innate pespective that the world, the government and “the system” owes them a living. The catch-cry is “a fair go”.
Please discuss your anti-capitalist sentiments elsewhere.
In the spirit of your “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you ” ideaology, I will offer you the following suggestion : Read some Nietzsche rather than Marx. Life will make more sense.
My first look at the list… Where are the subwoofers?
Umm Australian VICTORY at Gallipoli?? Maybe you arbiters of boaganism better get your history books out.
A very poised use of the term ‘arbiter’. You’re at the cutting edge of what it is to be a modern fuckwit. TBL
reading the entries is above anyone who uses any ‘azza’ nickname.
Geez that was a witty and clever response.
mazza, you were the one who directed the complaint to the producers of Animal House, weren’t you? You know, the historical mishap in the scene where Bluto was banging on about the Germans bombing Pearl Harbour.
I would have thought Fake Ray-Ban Wayfarers would have been pretty high on the list.
someone who can spell ‘arbiter’ while mis-spelling ‘boagan'(sic) ? – Its a setup!
I’ve never before read a post like this. The poster is cool, classy, intellectual and the site administrater is a dumb tool.
excellent page. And if you go by the list of things bogans like then that would make every person in australia a bogan in some way.
Huh! I thought bogans liked things like Cold Chisel, Bon Jovi, AC/DC, Jim Beam (white label), Wild Turkey, Jack Daniels, VB Beer, Draught tinnies, Stubbies, Thongs (sometimes with socks), ugg boots (especially the lace up ones), BBQ’s, Bon fires, V8 cars (especially the older ones) and usually go by the name of Shazza, Dazza, Kazza, Wazza. The list above describes people who are insucure and feel the need to follow trends. (which is basicly everyone).
read the what is a bogan today? page, emma.
(facepalm) ’bout time for a FAQ page, methinks.
you know there’ll still be people who make comments like this one even if there were an faq section at the top of every page.
I am a Bogan and are deply effended
You have to write one about Schoolies. See: http://www.dailytelegraph.com.au/news/schoolies-lovers-to-wed/story-e6freuy9-1225959965858
It combines many bogan loves… Schoolies, fake tans and weddings!
After just hearing your interview on abc 702 I could’nt wait to visit your website. It’s sooo funny! I love it I love it I love it!! Incidentally, I have just been invited to a ‘Bogan Theme’ party ( surely ‘Themed’ parties are worthy of this list? ) and the overuse of exclamation marks!!!!!!!!!!!
F’in awesome. Picked up your book a few weeks ago. Mackay is full of nouveau riche 21st century bogans, and the online quick list of “what bogans like” reads like a description of the “likes” of the people I’m surrounded by here. One by one I went through the list and thought, “check”, “yeah, mate,” “there’s another one,” “got that”, and so on. I’m going to bring it with me to the Sydney north shore area when I go back for Chrissie, and show it to my friends to illustrate the shockingly foreign land I’m now living in. The sad thing is, this bogan thang appears to be contagious. I’ve been here less than 5 months and already I, a 38 year old who doesn’t have Kylie’s arms, am going out in public in studded singlets, drinking XXXX, expanding my knowledge of Pink’s song catalog, admiring large flat screen TV’s at Harvey Norman, and the other day I actually purchased an Ed Hardy purse.
But about “bogans like fascinators”…. most Aussies who are on-trend and don’t have $2000 to drop on a couple new race hats for the season like fascinators because $500 goes a lot further in the fascinator world than it does in the hat world.
Oh, and regarding Brendan Fevola, most bogans around here (QLD) would say, “We like who?”. QLD is a League state.
Also missing is the obvious association between our convict past and bogan(ism).
Since moving to hillbilly Queensland two years ago (from WA) it has become apparent that the east coast is a hot bed for convict descendents.
Look up Mary Wade and her progeny…all bogans, all in NSW and Queensland. They have particular phenotypes – the skinny, thin lipped, ranga, Pauline Hanson type is one of them. Another is the thick neck, thick kneed, cowboy hat & flannelette wearing, rugby devotee…often bogan mixed with rural.
There’s thousands of them over here and they all came from Mary.
Didn’t know Gwen’s kid was also a bogan…
Deep Fryers…It’s like we can all make fast food at home. What could possibly be better for a bogan christmas present?
Bogan’s would be anyone who uses the foul word C*&T or K*&T with every second word. Plebs are everywhere but the few that stand out are the ferals that sit on their fat bums and whinge “centrelink cut me off the c*&t’s, I was gonna tell em about bazza livin here, but I’m also seeing gazza, you know keeping my options open, my six kids are with Docs, but you know I love em, and it’s all Doc’s fault that they are in foster care.. fucking centrelink blah blah blah”
This is funny stuff. I like it. GO THE BOGUNS
Hides, your sterotyping of the bogan as ‘poor’ is wrong. If you read the ‘What is a bogan today?’ page, you’ll find bogans nowadays are cashed up wankers, rather than your somewhat snobbish sterotype of a walfare recipient.
How can you guys not have put Fitness First on the list? It is the perfect amalgam of pimple-backed muscle bogans on ‘roids, fat bogans, inappropriate lycra, bogan music (aka Ministry of Sound and that Fergie person), standing around between sets discussing bogan topics etc etc …. join up now and get the full experience! I’m sure I’m not the first to think of it.
#428 Telling people bigger than themselves “Don’t make me angry. Don’t make me get up”. Who do they think they are? Bruce Banner?
It’s bogan-speak for “Leave me alone, I’m frightened”.
I was just wondering why ‘Jackass’ is not on the list of things bogans like. Thanks.
Valid point. TBL
#191 – Angus Beef and #162 – Footpaths Outside Nightclubs are in tags while the rest are in tags. This concerns me greatly. Love Pendant
Damn WordPress… the odd ones out are in h2 tags whereas the rest are p.
I know weddings were extensively covered, but was the wedding party dancing down the aisle in a choreographed routine a part of it? I hope so.
speaking of weddings: http://womansday.ninemsn.com.au/lifestyle/truelifestories/8170680/were-stuck-in-the-fifties
note i don’t actually read woman’s day website, but it was at the top of the
FFS, and if I wanted a tasteful, small ceremony to clebrate the love of my partner of 11 years, I would be de-valueing the sacred institution of marriage!! You could be certain there wouldn’t be anyone dressed as a farking oompah loompah…
“When we stumbled across a website where we could hire ‘small men’, we thought, ‘What a coincidence – let’s buy some Oompa-Loompas!’
top of the ninemsn page when i logged out of my email.
don’t know why half my comment disappeared there.
I found this rather belatedly. All I can say is that I trust all of you have seen family photographs, of the sort which depict your grandparents or even great grand-parents looking dignified on their wedding day. I have compiled a collection of just this sort of thing.
How would you go about explaining this sort of thing ? And in your absence, what are your descendants to think ?
Genealogy is the most bogan thing in existence.
Nick – totally support the Jackass as a top bogan thing however it is also our silent friend slowly killing and injuring our fine bogans specimens.
I would like to question one of the rankings and feel that Hey Hey it’s Sat should be number 1, to me has and will always be as bogan as a southern cross tattoo on a white paisley freckled back… it feeds, breeds and educates the bogan masses!
Very funny website. Thought of a couple to throw in there, Steve Irwin ( he’s fukkin’ choice mate!) and Throwing your ciggie butts out of the car window “’cause the assy’s for change.”
……and, posting dumbass comments on stupid websites at 1.30 in the morning whilst watching old war movies. Doh!
…..and quoting the Simpsons.
Panicking about Paedophile rings on their facebook with status warnings like this:
“Hey guys if you recently changed your profile picture to a cartoon character change it back now, Paedophiles want you to do this so they can lure in your children, pass on this important message” – FFS, how does a paedophile possibly benefit from this??
and another thing they like
Slactivism – http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Slacktivism
shortly followed by panicking about paedophiles on facebook
More hilariously, the comments for the first update were “that’s so cute!” followed by “people are so evil” for the second one.
Shortly after this I deleted my account. The moronicity on FB is such that I can only borrow from Lord Charos and say *sigh*.
What is it with CuBs and their obsession with paedophilia? Suddenly, there’s one lurking behind every rock, shrub and grassy knoll?
The research indicates peadophilic activity is no more prevalent now than 50yrs ago, and probably slightly less so. It’s just that we hear about it more.
My Beloved is a professional news photographer, and you should see the death stares he gets if he happens to be walking to a job, several large cameras slung over his shoulder, within 300 yards of JaXXXson or Maddyhsynnnn. He’s been confronted by morons demanding to see his Blue Card – as he’s WALKING to a job, not actually shooting. Of course, this would no doubt be how a paedophile would surrepticiously blend in – by wearing a vest with PHOTOGRAPHER plastered across it, and lugging $40k worth of camera gear.
Interestingly, this neurotic reaction is almost exclusively confined to the “aspirational” suburbs comprised solely of new estates – the ticky-tack McMansions, the overfinanced cars, the Juicy Couture mums, the kids with stupid names. Never has he encountered this in the inner city.
…and yet, they continue to dress their children in clothing more appropriate for prostitutes.
I can see that your living virtually at Kings Cross has given you a lot of experience to fall back on. Adds verisimilitude.
They look yummy too ! The girls at the cross i.e. Real Kentucky Fried girls. “Finger Licking Good” !!
Maybe, just one on “face book campaigns”?
What about giving their children stupidly spelled common names? Or made up combination names?
see ‘a bogue by any other name’.
Surely time for Tiesto – or was that covered in #143 David Guetta?
Bogans relly love Christmas time, and pimping up their cars. Either with those reindeer horns, and cute little red noses……..or even better, by decorating their cars with tinsel, beads, etc. I saw one the other day with a Xmas trees lining the back of a bogans car.
Or maybe the person who decorates their car for Christmas loves the season and want so spread goodwill to mankind?
Occasionally I get on a bus that’s decked out with mad Christmas decorations and I think its pretty cool!
Life experience. Whatever it IS supposed to be, it is definitely not education.
Why don’t they just say “It took a lot of television to get this old” or something.
I have a fully fledged Bogan sister-in-law, and I have some classics that must make the list:
Arriving to your wedding in a Mack truck or on a Harley, or in either a Ford or Holden Sports edition.
KFC on a Thursday night.
Buying your kids 237 Christmas presents, but failing to feed properly them or buy them shoes throughout the year.
Anything bought from Jay Jays.
And my personal favourite, buying a lawn mower from Big W.
i’ll defend jay jays – they’re great for cheap jeans when you’re a student with no money to pay brand name prices.
The use of the acronym “R.I.P” seems a glaring omission from this list.
a few that u may want to consider for the next book….pitbulls, hanging boxing bags in the carport, 4-wheel motor bikes, Animal Stak suppliments, bog laps, Prada sunglasses, financing $70k Maloo utes whilst still living in and renting dilapidated housing units in fringe suburbs….
They usually buy the maloo or XR8 ute whilst still in trade school(earning fuck all) and don’t need a ute, and prang it before they they are qualified, then start their career in dept. I’m a plumber and i drive my mums old car.
Spending $10,000 trying to get off a charge of DUI after “I wrote it off, mate” because “if I don’t don’t the fucking insurance won’t pay, mate.” Also, paying a “mate” to say he was driving when you went through that speed camera, so you can keep your last point.’
I’m pretty sure that a NSW High Court Judge is the exemplar
Here’s one for the list: The Wiggles. Bogans can’t seem to get enough of dragging their spawn to The Wiggles live shows and dropping a month’s smokes money on merchandise to commemorate the occasion. Totally worth every cent it costs so that two month old Branchelle can see her favourite, Murray, in person… from the back of a crowded auditorium.
I think it’s pretty cool that a great childrens’ entertainment act like The Wiggles exists! Why would you begrudge children the enjoyment of a live music gig??
The Wiggles are annoying and bogan. I go mental if it’s on TV, but I can handle say Sesame Street or Playschool, kids Tv has become way bogan.
Cop Bashing- not the actual physical kind but more the behind their back verbal kind. All bogans love a rebel, and while most people can appreciate the honest rebel (Nelson Mandela, Mahatma Gandhi or even Guy Fawkes), the Bogan chooses the less honest rebel, especially those who shoot at cops. Ned Kelly is the most popular of these less honest rebels. While not alot is known about the circumstances surrounding the Kelly’s and possible police and government corruption at the time (being the 19th century and before Wikileaks). The bogan will automaticly identify with Ned, even to the point of getting his final words inked on their body. They know that Ned is good and cops are cunts. Even today cops across Australia are being punished because of what they did to Ned. If the bogan drinks too much and drives and get caught, the cops are cunts. If they drive a piece of shit car with a loud stereo/exhaust and alcohol stickers on the back, the cops are cunts for pulling them over. Anytime they fuck up it’s the “pigs” fault. They don’t know that the cops are looking for anything that stands out, and if your rude to them expect more shit. The mere site of a cop will stop the bogan mid sentence to abuse the cops, usually out of audible range for that cop. And it’s not just cops, as a defence member i have put up with abuse from bogans(on ANZAC day) while in uniform(the same ones that get pissed and talk about joining the army), upon seeing someone wearing a uniform issued by the authority the bogan explodes. They haven’t got it that the same authority protects their bigass plasma, a rarely used tinny, the new ute they use to get to their sales job and their fuckugly fake concrete bunker of a house, from being turned into worthless shit should society fail. Most people know that without police or army, nothing would stop the ferals from taking over, it would be like Mad Max 2. But to the bogan who feels it’s ok to glass cunts, do burnouts during christmas at highpoint or start a fight at 11:30pm in the food court, the cop’arrhh is a mortal enemy. With respect for recent events in Melbourne involving a teenager being shot, i have heard many bogans claim “that they could have handled it better and wouldn’t have had to shoot him”. While there are sure to be bogans in the police force(shitload in defence), they are at least doing what many bogans are too scared to do, which brings them to a respectable level of bogan.
Also dialing 000 to contact their local police station and cracking the shits when they acually have to go down there to make a complaint.
cop “what time was the bike stolen?”
bogan “i don’t fucking know, just find it”
cop “could you give a description of the bike?”
bogan “it’s silver”
cop “bmx, moutain bike?”
bogan “stop asking fucking questions and find the fucking bike, i don’t pay you to sit around, now get out there and find the fucking bike”
Arrested and without little Blaykes bike, the bogan will go to the pub and brag about how it took 5 cops to hold him down. True story.
Why do bogans build their McMansion complete with the Alfresco option then park their tradie ute and lancer on the drive way so that they can turn their double garage into their indoor/outdoor living area complete with couches, ping pong table and unflued bbq?
so you wouldn’t want a indoor/outdoor area with couches, ping pong and a bbq? sounds pretty ace to me!
Boguns love doing the Kakoda trail, going to Gallipoli on ANZAC day, on line betting, going to Antarctica, placing teddy bears and baloons at the scene of a mates fatal accident, cheap ‘n’ nasty suites for a court appearance.
Or leaving Australian flags and empty Jim Beam cans at the crash scenes…
I’d love to be a bogan then because I’ve never visited the Kokoda Track, Antarctica or Gallipoli.
This list is too big. Even the most sophisticated people I know have some things in common with this list. chop it down please editors (bunch of retards).
It’s “Things Bogans Like”, not “If You Do This You’re A Bogan”.
I’m guilty of about 80 out of 205 on the list myself, but I don’t consider myself a bogan because:
a) I’m aware of my bogan tendencies
b) I enjoy intellectual pursuits
c) I refuse to make important decisions with a “me first” mentality.
Ash, you will be wasting your time reasoning with Jack, he is a bogan you see.
Also he thinks Teh Editors can’t hear him if he uses parentheses.
Teh editors can always hear me. I am a bogan God! :) well not really. sorry for using the term retards, thought they would cut that out. Ash, I agree with u now… after some additonal reading :) ….BUT… some people are making comments on this website, unfairly targeting low income families, like “Chris” below 22:12:11 re. the Ikea comment. Its not like everybody can afford a $4,000 couch. Geezuz.
Please add to list, Bogans love being a victim – they have a victim mentality . ROFLMFAO
Don’t you think IKEA should be added to the TBL list?
Bogan families swarm there on weekends so they can purchase mass produced ‘designer’ furniture and other household items, then move through to the cafeteria where they can all enjoy a $2 hotdog and coke or serving of swedish meatballs.
Pretty sure you’ll find it here…TBL
Nah, Fantastic Furniture. Something about them just seems so bogan. :P
I don’t know what, but they just are.
In other words, they like a bit of #125.
Dangling your sunnies under your chin like some sort of weird prosthetic Abe Lincoln beard. Almost tolerable if you are skippering a maxi yacht; utterly stupid if you are swanning around a Westfield.
Or worse still, spinning the sunnies around altogether so they are resting on the back of the neck..
Pink polo shirt(and i mean a polo shirt with a number on the back) with the collar up and sunnies the size of fist worn like a golden DG crown.
You are the only people in Australia who don’t like at least one thing on that list!
I’m sipping on a massive can as I type this. TBL
Please add to the list those bogans that ride those stupid mountain bikes with engines. In one machine they convey both their unwillingness to do what is required of them in a given situation, and their belief they can cheat the system by thinking they are riding a motorbike.
What about the current fashion trend amongst young Gen Y boguettes of wearing those strappy open toe roman sandle type shoes combined with cut-off denim shorts which would put Daisy Duke to shame. It was crap fashion in the 70’s/80’s and its still crap recycled this time around!
Crappy, pappy eulogies.
New to your website. Having been living in the US (bogan free as there is no reciprocal 2 yr work visa program) for the last 7 years, I am enjoying the list of bogan cultural crimes.
Not sure if you have covered it but you might want to collate a list of bogan wedding songs. I attended a wedding back in 97 where the lovely couple danced to Pearl Jam’s (“can’t find a”) Better Man. That’s bogan gold!
I would have that played at my wedding as a joke.
Usa bogan free ? Hmmmm pleanty of redknecks though and pleanty of arseholes. Pleanty of nice people too but I suspect the best leave and go live in Canada or Australia or anywhere without Republicans.
No bogans in the US? Get a grip. They are there in droves, but they don’t go by the name “bogans”. I don’t know what the generic term is but you can find plenty of them via google in “walmart people”. Take you ten seconds. Why has everyone here seen emails of these creatures but you haven’t? That’s puzzling. I first got one maybe 5 years ago…
Your suggestion of wedding songs is a classic, the the way.
Why doesn’t the US have a name for bogans? They created the whole bogan culture, we just classed it up a bit and gave it a name.
Davo, I think either “Rednecks” or “trailer trash” would go close.
Rednecks and trailer trash arent bogans, they’re just like our ferals. I was talking about the real bogan culture the USA created. Fast food, megamalls, megachurches, multistorey carparks, wiggers, SUVs, hollywood, the mid west, megafreeways, kings of leon, las vegas and all celebrities. Just about everything on the TBL list can be tracked back to the US. Their bogans set the trend for ours.
It is amplified in Australia because we are so small-time compared to the USA. The Aussie bogan aspires to be what the US bogan is. P!nk, for instance, is not nearly as popular over there as here because there’s just so much more going on over there, culturally.
Yeah actually there is a name for that crap.
May I suggest Jet Skis as something beloved by the bogan with money to burn.
We could make a list of things which attract nouveau riche bogans
e.g. the top of the line HSV.
There doesn’t seem to be a mention of Natalie Bassinghtwaite! She’s one of Australia’s bogan queens! I’ve heard drag queens refer to her as Narelle Boganwaste!
(Sob, sniff)…. God bless those drag queens.
it must be lovely to be so superior to everyone else
not superior to everyone else. just superior to bogans.
1;Watching mass murderers being philosophical before execution.
2; Notify me of follow-up comments via email.
3;Notify me of new posts via email.
Things Bogans Like.
This is the biggest TRY-HARD list written by bogan’s who wish to be middle/upper middle class. Some of the things on here are ridiculous i.e., NYE, carparks, ducks, history?????? Why don’t you just add ‘breathing and eating’ too?
It’s bogans. Apostrophe crime. TBL
Oh dear, we don’t get it do we White. Go have a lie down.
we didn’t read past the titles, did we?
I fear not.
They didn’t even do that. They had someone read it to them because reading is for pooftah’s!!!!!!
*deliberate apostrophe and exclamation crime*
Well it’s not necessary in the Herald Sun, so why should he be expected to do more reading here??
To quote a delicious slice of irony, TISM style, with their song “Opposite Day”:
“Just imagine an opposite world, though it is hard to do
Newspapers for illiterates, leaders say untruths,
The best people in this world ignored, while the brats it mollycoddles,
Rock stars are seen as serious, also supermodels,
And the actors would all treated as if they were like kings,
And normal folk would be just like…anonymous nothings!
The young girl put down her book and laid her sleepy head,
‘But that world could never exist. Thank you, Satan’, she said.”
I’m certain that they were referring to the Herald-Scum and The Daily Terrorgraph there as the said newspapers for illiterates, all pictures and bold headlines.
White, I agree with you. This site is trying too hard. When people try that hard, they are always…compensating
What was that?
ummm…why is “history” on this list?
Ummm… because it’s a hyperlink, and you can click on it to read an article with that title. What was your theory? TBL
Discovering your Sony tv is a genuine ‘Made in Japan’ sticker.
Two bogan havens:
1) Sushi Trains
2) High Tea venues
and your list was so nearly complete…
Well I’m a pure bogan because I love both and am unapologetic
I am immune deficient and would not be game to go near a sushi train a gadzillion mixed germs to the cc no wonder the japanese have funny eyes
What about energy drinks? One of my bogan employees drinks them like water. And he has a desk job. And then can’t work out why he is so fat.
…sorry, just spotted #21. My bad.
Leaving the shops today I was given reason to think about this very issue as I spotted a sight that caused me considerable confusion. It wasn’t the tardy and despicable act of littering, unfortunately I’ve come to see this as somewhat of a given, nope it was the actual item of bogan jetsam.
MOTHER – LOW CARB
I’m no dietitian, but from my knowledge carbohydrates are energy and as Mother is an energy drink that promotes itself as being in the maxtreme league what we have here is, at the very least, a contradiction, possibly even an oxymoron but definitely a brilliant piece of bogan trapping on the part of CCA.
Why isn’t the Southern 80 Boat race on this list! If you’ve ever been, you’ll know there’s more Bogans there than the Deni Ute Muster… Speaking of which, it is also omitted!
They’re more yobbo events. Yobs are harmless. Bogans only talk of going to Southern 80, Deni ute muster and Bathurst. They may have gone once and they’ll talk about it like they go every year.
I’m thinking Fantastic Furniture
Pro bull riding.
Watching endless repeats of The Simpson’s and still not getting it.
Apostrophe crime. TBL
Thinking The Simpsons is a kids show.
Why do bogans feel the need to share their pathetic taste in music with everyone in a 1 mile radius. I now have Indian students across the road copying bogans by getting loud stereos.
best response i’ve ever seen to too loud music – someone on the train with their ipod at maximum volume – was when someone else started singing along. it freaked the guy out a bit, but got the message across and he did turn the volume down.
New digital channel Eleven for broadcasting repeats of Roseanne.
Expensive cast wine.
Is it made in a mould? I can only imagine that food grade silicone would be the only way to go.
Repeats off early Neighbours. That would be nice.
Bogans love hating on other bogans :)
What about Picture magazine??? It’s Australia’s best selling men’s magazine,with regular informative columns as ‘my best fuck’ ‘my worse fuck’ ‘my public fuck’ and ‘my lezzo fuck’ and what Bogan girl doesn’t want to be a homegirl? They used to have homeblokes for the pleasure of the Bogan girl, yet they done away with that since it was bordering too much on the homoerotic and the editors said ‘it was a men’s magazine first and foremost!’ even though they had a homeblokes annual!
To get a job there as a writer all you need to know is how to spell FWORR!!
As a previously avid reader of these periodicals, i think you mean FWOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAR.
I’ve failed the spelling test for a job at Picture? For some reason I find that a bit depressing.
It’s okay, you can be the guy who makes up new words for genitals. Spadge, Spadger, Quim, Tocko, Gutstick etc.
What about those Nail places in shopping centres?
Bogans are not merely an underclass, they are quintesential Australians. Quote from my long dead maternal grandfather “the upper class can kiss my royal Australian arse”. To my fellow Bogans, stay strong, continue our proud heritage, iconoclastic, sacred-cow bashing, establishment rocking
FNQ you are clearly not a bogan. There are too many long words in your post, and most of them are spelled correctly.
What, no Footy Show? Did I miss it in there somewhere?
Ooh ooh CRUISES! (Holidays on a boat, not the family of Tom. Maybe them too.)
Matthew Mitcham is the new ‘face’ of Hot Tuna! The oldest fav of bogan mums everywhere, what bogan didn’t wear Hot Tuna as an adolescent!
This just proves that being a bogan transcends gender, belief, race and sexuality!
I was just about to upload this film. I love her, i want her to come slap my balls one night.
Bogans like Byron Bay….
they have ruined it forever….
What about people that are so insecure about themselves they feel compelled to make a website denigrating people different to them? Really do you people have nothing better to do with your time? And to think some of you would have children that you pass this ideology onto, very scary.
I can see your point the Nood and to support you there have been a number of commentators in the U.K. citing the denegration of ‘Chav’ culture as a form of racism, so the same can be said about the predjudice against ‘Bogans’.
At the same time those who ascribe to Bogan culture (knowingly or not) have a lot of influence in the socio-political activities and development of our country and therefore a critical commentary of their culture is required.
Bogans attack many other cultures and minority groups in our society and in a much harsher and uninformed way and are far more hateful than the people behind this blog ever will be!
If there were such thing as bogans or bogan culture, you might have a point. As things stand, my money’s with The Nood
Noddy, Actually old chap this site is for people who are so comfortably with their own self immage that they can poke fun at anything.
Have a locksmith ,or a Psychiatrist check your own security levels though.Just to be sure to be sure.
I don’t think so. I think this site attracts people who are insecure and need to shore up their own self image by inventing a scapegoat called the bogan and pouring all their vitriol onto this phantasm.
Jesse, did you know the bogan is responsible for the Earth being round. They are a dangerous breed and need watching.
Simon, They are especially dangerous when breeding.
Yeh, we don’t want that race of people known as The Bogan expanding do we JH. Sterilise the f#ckers.
a small nutron bomb at Sailsbury ?
Phantasm, I am soooo impressed. That is at least a $1.75 word.
I suggest you rent and watch the Movie “Idiocracy”. This is where main stream Australia and the Bogan are headed. I like people who are different from me, alot. But the Bogan isn’t just different, it is insidious. It needs to be denigrated, scorned, belittled, humiliated and exposed for what it truly is…. a social, physical, moral, ethical and mental cretin.
Two problems with ‘Idiocracy':
1. Why is it set 500 years in the future, when it’ll only take 20 years (if that)?
2. Why waste all that money on set construction, when they could’ve just shot it on location in Sowff East Queensland?
I always love the cliched criticism of “nothing better to do with your time” when the critic has clearly spent their time in the same way… and then taken the time to post a criticism – just to compound their own hypocrisy.
There’s one missing! The most bogan thing ever … scrapbooking. It’s pure marketing genius – selling worthless crap to the unimaginative to make them feel fulfiled and creative. Self realisation through scrapbooking.
Let’s sell little packets of scrap paper for $10. While we’re at it, let’s make the pages a new format (30cm square) so they have to go out and buy more paper, folders etc. Oooh – lets sell teensy packets of diamantes, letters and cutouts. I know a new word! Brads. Do you like it? And even though we sell them all the preprinted bits and magazines with layouts to follow, they can show how creative they really are.
I’m sure it has nothing to do with people keeping their photos in digital format and the entire photo printing industry taking a nosedive. That would be cynical.
Oh sweet baby jaysus on a unicycle. Scrapbooking…. making piles of shyte out of other piles of shyte. The awful CUB hambeast across the road from us holds scrapbooking evenings at least once a week, and the boguettes who show up are referred to as “the brides of satan” by all in my house. The street is clogged with shitty KIA people movers and chevrodores until late when they all depart in a fashion resembling the stampeding bison in “Dances with Wolves”. Her indoors got an invitation once and responded with a polite “thanks but no thanks”; since then, the hambeast has either ignored her or responded with mild-to medium hostility. God I hate scrapbooking.
What’s even scarier is a woman I know owns a scrapbpooking business where she teaches people how to scrapbook and sells little packets of crap . It is very successful and growing!
Enterprise is annoying, huh? There’s nothing worse than a bogan who doesn’t know her place. Bogans belong on the dole, yeah?
Just for clarification: does this website argue that bogans are dole bludgers or enterprising business people? Just want to clarify because one stereotype is okay but two stereotypes that blur together, that’s called prejudice right?
What are your thoughts on pole dancing for fitness?
My thoughts are that fitness tones the body, burns calories and elevates people’s mood. There should be ore fitness in the world, not less!
for pole dancing an oar would be better ?
How about “Packed to the Rafters”. Literally a show about nothing.
And Tony Roma’s restaurants. Surely just an a la carte version of Sizzler.
How about the misuse of the word literally?
The Gold Coast is long overdue for the TBL treatment. It combines so many TBL classics in one handy location: Footpaths outside nightclubs, Ed Hardy, glassing cunts, last year’s designer drug, franchises, Tiffany & Co, the casino, massive cans, tramp stamps, 3-park superpass and of course, weddings (barefoot on the beach, obviously).
Not on the list, but also essential elements of the Gold Coast experience are: stretch Hummer limousines, canal estates and faded 80s “luxury” hotels.
But where would you start? Mabe TBL just don’t have the energy or manpower to tackle such a huge issue. Maybe they’re worried about the stress related illnesses resulting from total immersion in QLD ‘culture’.
do the people that write these articles actually believe them? or is it just a joke.
I think what you ment to say was that you should not be reading these blogs; with out parental supervision at, least !!
How about a little story on the Bradford Exchange? It’s got to be the best Bogan Memorabilia mail order site around. Where else can you get a Sons of the Southern Cross Ring, An Elvis Chopper or a Don Bradman Mini Bat.
This stuff is worthy of spot on any Bogues mantlepiece. No in fact it’s just plain cringe worthy. C’mon TBL, you know you want it!
Thanks for nothing, Dux. Now I have to clean the coffee-spray of the screen (not to mention deleting my browser history; like I want people to see I’ve been looking at this sh!t.) I can’t remember the last time I saw such a pile of crap in the one place; this site makes kitch look good. Seriously: a “Baby Obama” doll next to a figurine of Robert E. Lee.. WTF. And a Sons of the Southern Cross Ring… should come in handy at the next Cronulla riot.
*off* the screen. D’oh.
OMFG Peter Brock cukkoo clock.
Ummm, I am speechless, I have no speech.
In a way, it’s a shame TBL exists as a website. If it didn’t Bradford Exchange could change their name to Things Bogans Like.
Best not look at “Baby Umi” the life size baby orangutang, with a free ‘pacifier’
There is no God. I’m going to put this as simply as I can: What kind of freaking pond-scum buys this crap?
What do you think they were thinking when they put the bow on the head without any evidence of a clip or band? http://www.ashtondrake.com/products/301156001_so-truly-real-vinyl-doll.html
“Nah mate. They’ll never notice. Nail it. Glue it. It’s only a f*****g monkey.”
I agree that it is unattractive, but at least some proceeds go to preserving the rainforest.
That is the nastiest shit I have ever seen.
Bogan Panic du Jour on ACA last night: The Killer Plasma tellies. Apparently little rugrats are crawling up said big screen TVs and pulling them on top of themselves. A story no parent can afford to miss.
Fembogue pops out sprog, collects Bogan Bucks, buys the big screen TV, TV falls on sprog. Kind of a neat little circle of life thing going on there.
If a child was really hurt by being crushed in this way, why are you crowing about it??
And why do you watch ACA?
Shocking, TV could have been damaged !
You gotta love those people who keep filing the creators of this Blog nerds…
So sad. :P
This doesn’t make any sense. Get Wyatt McCoach to do it for you next time, he’s worth the Wesley school fees. TBL
Can I suggest you do one about collectible figurines. You know those lovely ones with medieveal ladies, knights, dragons and unicorns? They usually feature those stalwarts of bogan culture … crystal, glitter and a hint of porn. http://www.ashtondrake.com/mcategory/fantasy-dolls.html
I haven’t even had a thorough look through this website, but i can say this already just by looking at the names of these posts, how many of you from melbourne have personalised plates and foxtel? My guess a fair bit. People are people, who gives a damn if their tradies or not. Just because they have the guts to say stuff that you say behind closed doors does not mean that they are bogan.
I love the way that everyone must be a closet racist, everyone who lacks personalised plates must secretly covet them etc. etc.
And it must be asked, what are the tradies doing (or not)?
No article for over a week (and the last one was more of a pious rant than thought-provoking). Is this the end of TBL? Rest in Peace. We had some good times.
We’re still trucking – we’ve churned out a 90,000 word book manuscript in the first two months of 2011, which has knackered us a bit. Also, we drafted 90% of a boganomics article for last Friday for MacroBusiness, but it got knocked back due to a bit of unexpected editorial sensitivity relating to Australia’s richest person. TBL
I find the boganomics book ultra cringeworthy. I was at the Sydney Opera House when Chas McSween spoke. The audience booed him.
everyone in Australia would tick a few of these..
I’m finding that bogans LOVE dubstep… But there is no post on this? *hint*
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