Hello, there. E. Chas McSween here on behalf of Michael, Intravenus, Hunter, Flash and Enron, collectively known as the Things Bogans Like travelling troupe/freak show. As you are no doubt aware, our illustrious former Friday activity, Bogan Bribe Watch, was cruelly cut short (after being cruelly extended) last week when our parliament managed to cobble together some semblance of a government. Taken aback by the lightning-fast resolution to what we hoped would be an ongoing constitutional crisis that would result in months of bogan-baiting, and a verdant source of material for Bogan Bribe Watch, we hastily convened in our Bogan Cave, to pit our fiendish wits against one another and develop an incredible new addition to the TBL universe. The plan was that we could provide you, the reader, with the end-of-week intellectual and ego-stroking boost you no doubt require.
After about twenty minutes, several brief bouts of fisticuffs and half a slab, we decided to revert to our stock in trade, which is to pilfer from others’ good ideas. As such, we present for your weekly edification, the Friday Bachelor of Bogan (BBo). Forthwith, we will present you with a weekly quiz, to see how closely you have been paying attention to the bogan news stories, or general trends, at hand. Click on the correct answer and you will be fired through science to the source of our bogan mirth. Fail to click on the correct answer, and your face will melt like those Nazis in at least two Indiana Jones movies.
You have been warned.
1. Kyle Sandilands wants a new mega-mansion party house because:
2. Why did Miss Universally Bogan, Jesinta (sic) Campbell recently approach Eddie Maguire?
3. Sexy French newsreader Melissa Theuriau has convinced the bogan to fork over its hard earned for:
a) Acai berries
4. After watching channel nine’s new reality program, The Real Hustle, starring chk chk boom girl Clare Werbrloff and Gyton Grantley, bogans will:
5. Victorian jet ski drivers are:
6. This week, Ed Hardy stores: