My dad and I used to joke that given bogan’s obsession with getting darker and Indian/Asian people’s obsession with lighter skin, there must be some kind of ideal skin tone in between. I reckon it’s mine.

On their 2009 album, Surface Paradise, there’s a wonderful track called “Orange People”: not referring to the cult from the 1980s, with Ma Sheela (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ma_Anand_Sheela) of ‘tough titties” fame, but to those people who utilise solariums or fake tans.

Here’s some extracts of the lyrics for your consideration:

“They’re sizzling in solariums like bratwurst on a grill
Yellowcake complexion from Club Med Chernobyl”

and:

“Orange people in the corporate world climbing up the ladder
Doing coke but looking more like Fanta”

Listen here:

I turned on the television about a week ago and it landed on an episode of Dr Phil. It was about people “getting real” with themselves.
Suddenly it shot to a couple on a couch getting coached by this woman who I sh*t you not, was orange.
Not just your run of the mill Navel or Washington coloured orange. No, it was like a deep crimson orange.
A head shot of this woman who looked like she was going for the pumpkin look at Halloween was telling these poor schmucks to “get real” with themselves!
So ridiculous that I seriously thought it was MAD TV!