Despite having a lifelong, unfulfilled ambition to have sick chops on the guitar, the bogan is generally a novice when it comes to musical instruments. Often, a bogan will consider purchasing a new electric guitar, but guitars cost at least $250, and the fully sick ones can cost as much as a ginormous plasma screen. Besides, in the past the bogan’s attempts at this sort of thing have been strangely unrewarding. It’s relieving, perhaps, that it instead picks up a $100 Guitar Hero guitar to play Guitar Hero: Metallica on its $350 Xbox.
The bogan likes playing Guitar Hero because the bogan is on an inexorable quest for maxtreme awesomeness. And in the age of bogan-friendly shredgaming, the inability to play guitar is no obstacle to a bogan proclaiming itself a massive axe god, and talking about melting bulk face on the weekend. With key influences including Wayne, Garth, Bill and Ted, the bogan is ready to enter the halls of rock guitar Excellence. And no rock guitar has more bogan cachet than a Fender Stratocaster.
The Fender Stratocaster (or ‘strat’ as the bogan will call it, the nickname perhaps implying a bond between the bogan and its instrument,) is the world’s best known guitar. It is the one guitar the bogan needs to know, which is lucky because the bogan mistakes the names of all the other guitars for Cars or strange foreign food (link). The bogan also likes the Fender Stratocaster because it’s what Slash played, out in front of that church in the desert, wailing out massive chops in November Rain.
The bogan loves to hold the exact Strat that Slash is famous for playing, except maxximised for shredgaming, and nail sophisticated fingering and picking techniques after a few goes. Then after the outro is done, it’s straight back with another soaring classic, with the bogan centre stage, playing more Epic Leads. Even when the game throws up some wierd poofy music, the bogan still likes playing its Strat. It can just focus on nailing the timing of objects coming down a 3D-looking fretboard, all the time watching an animated muso in tight jeans rock out for maximum crowd points. It is fair to say the bogan doesn’t realise the animated muso-hipster probably drinks soy lattes and reads Henry Miller, and idolises its proto-bogan forefather rockers, who actually knew their way around a genuine Fender Stratocaster. That doesn’t matter, because when it comes to Fender Stratocasters, the bogan has no complaints. The bogan likes Fender Stratocasters.
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To be fair, I think Slash is playing a Les Paul.
Um, for your answer Michael, place cursor over the picture.
Or look at the tags.
#1
If the author knows it’s a Les Paul (sorry – they were much more precise than that: “a Gibson”), why make it seem otherwise? I posit that they couldn’t correctly identify possibly the most ubiquitous guitar on earth, and needed it pointed out to them after the fact.
Strats are indeed for posers. But real bogans – even the imaginary straw-man cashed-up variety – start out with a Squire or a Samick, and dream of upgrading to an Ibanez, Charvel, or Jackson. Which guitars the author probably hasn’t heard of, given that – as it seems – he doesn’t even know the difference between a Strat and a Les Paul, for fuck’s sake.
Aw, my first was a Samick and now I have an Ibanez. Please don’t judge me.
People like me who know about Leo Fender’s best inventions know that G & L guitars are better than Fender teles and Fender strats and are not bogan at all.
I do think Gibsons are over rated though.
Fender Stratocasters sound like tinny shit. Of this the bogan is completely unaware.
Jimi Hendrix might beg to differ. If he wasn’t too busy, with, you know, being dead and all…
True, if you want a real bogan guitar, I’d look at a Dean Razorback, that, my friend is maxtreme ..
Maybe. But for the bogan to achieve maxxxtreme beefiness with their fully-sick guitar skillz, like their heroes Nickleback, they need a thicker sound than what a Strat can give.
I have no comeback to that. I am too busy hanging my head and weeping for the future of humanity.
when the bogan wants to think he/she is a political activist through music, he/she may point towards ownership of Greenday’s “American Idiot” cd. Billy Joe plays a strat.
@Michael: Strat’s are supposed to sound trebly. It enables them to be heard over the din of the rest of the band. Let us not bag the stratocaster. It has more than proven itself. Note; I play a maton mastersound, because I don’t like the tinny strat sound.
Sound so thin it’s barely there
Like a bitchy girl that Just Don’t Care
Fender Stratocaster
there’s just something about that sound
-Jonathan Richman
Yep. They sound like utter shit. Ritchie Blackmore and the guys from Iron Maiden can attest to this statement.
At least Adrian Smith has the sense to play a Les Paul quite a lot. No surprise he’s the best musician in Maiden.
Tinny is good. It allows the bass player to get some attention. Youse are bogans because you’re probably the type to want to drown out the bass.
Strats are awesome and aren’t the slightest bit bogan. They’ve got a good amount of space between the strings and are comfortable to play. Les Pauls are stupid and pointless (except for playing Led Zeppelin) and cost $3k or some shit. Complete poseurs guitar.
This bass player (the bogan always wants to be the centre of attention, ergo aspiring to lead guitarist, or likes thumping the stuffing out of sh¡t, thus otherwise plumping for drums, therefore bassists are usually the fat dork who craves not being in the spotlight and actually knows stuff!) brandishes a Rickenbacker 4001V63, which is about as anti-bogan as it gets: these accurate vintage reissue neck-through-body construction axes weigh a tonne (actually, about 4.5 kg), hewn from solid rock maple with a Hong Kong rosewood fretboard, have a distinct sound, which is not to the bogan’s liking, i.e. excellent treble cut-through on the high notes captured by the “Horseshoe” pickup (that design closely tracing its origins to the very first electric guitar, Rickenbacker’s own “Frying Pan”), with a very solid low-end resonance to counter that, due to the one-piece construction and the vintage “Toaster” pickups, the same type that have an inherently compressed sound that give their six- and twelve-strings that trademark chiming jangle (another sound the bogan dislikes) that can only emanate from a Rick.
Coupled to that, mine also wears a set of Tomastik Infeld “Jazz” strings, which combine flatwounds on D and G, with groundwounds (semi-flats) on the E and A, you have a bass that has a swirling, creamy fat bottom-end with some trademark Rick growl around the mid to treble range. All of which renders my 4001 as a surprisingly versatile instrument, able to cover jazz, pop from the classic AM era, rock, pop-rock, folk-rock, psychedelia, jazz-rock, soul, blues (I know the purists out there would insist on a Fender Precision for that sound, but the fat low end with the mutes on works a treat), early funk, indie, new wave (which this instrument was a mainstay of) and early heavy metal (again, almost all bassists of those bands played them, because of their presence in their sound). Basically any genre that calls for distinctive, insistent, clear and almost-melodic basslines, all of which confound the bogan “listener” (I think they just “hear” music, rather than intently “listen”, such is the drivel they subject their ears to.
One may be forgiven for think that I work in Rickenbacker’s marketing department for my plaudits I’ve lauded upon my instrument, but ultimately, any Rickenbacker is of little-to-no consequence to them, as there’s no entry-level budget brand or quality tiering system, unlike Fender, which have “Mexicans”, “Japanese” or “American” Fenders, as well as their el-cheapo Squier models, or Gibson, which have Epiphone, thus their guitars are quite exclusive, still 100% handcrafted in Santa Ana, California, by a family company that remains fiercely independent, maintaining a relatively small line of products that have changed very little in their timeless designs, thus the quality of their instruments has remained consistent, unlike other makes that have suffered when ownership had changed. Combine that with the fact that one can seldom simply buy one straight away—there’s a waiting list of over a year for most models and there’s currently no Australian distributor, so one has to order overseas for it—you have something that cannot cannot even satisfy their desire for instant gratification, even if they could get over the distinct sounds of their guitars and basses just to have something that they could call a status symbol, of which would be lost on their mates.
“Wot, it’s not a Strat? Or a Les Paul? Nah, don’t care!”. I kind of like fine that way.
Too true Bag O. I used to play with a couple of drummers and whenever I started slapping and popping they’d just sit there and do nothing and refused to play. They just wanted to bash the drums and cared nothing for any interesting beats. It’s no wonder musicianship is basically non existent in today’s music unless one wants to go out of their way.
I was only mucking around when putting shit on the Les Paul, the bogan in me got jealous. Although I don’t really see the point in them unless one is striving for a very particular sound or simply likes the look for them and has the money.
Believe or not, a Rickenbacker 330/360/370 actually costs quite a bit less than a high-end Gibson Les Paul, despite the fact that the supply side doesn’t meet the demand end of the former and that the LP, even in that guise, is still quite ubiquitous.
Rickenbacker did the smart thing years ago and patented all of their designs from the word go, which means finding a Rick copy is next to impossible, given that they jealously guard their intellectual property and squash copyists straight away, whereas Gibson and Fender weren’t so clever, thus copies of many of their designs are allowed to proliferate without impunity to this day. And the few Rickenfakers that exist miss out on various traits that are integral to their design, such as twin truss rods, neck-thru-body construction, high-gloss epoxy finish and select-grade timbers.
Hats off to you Bag O’, that’s a beautiful instrument. Play it often! Love the sound of Rick basses and guitars – and they look amazing too. Not that I dislike the looks of the Stratocaster. Imagine when it just came out; it must have seemed like a guitar from another planet…
Aww, thanks! And I do play it often, for these are built to be played.
When it débuted in 1957, the Stratocaster was futuristic: slim, ergonomic, multiple sounds from the three pickups…a guitarist’s delight, and Buddy Holly was one of its earliest exponents. The “cresting wave” design of the 4000 series Rickenbacker basses also appeared that year, also being a carefully designed instrument that pursued the Modernist ethos of form following function—while being primarily a product of the latter, the former aspect can still be appreciated in its own right and like great Modernist architecture, still remains gracefully timeless in its purposeful minimalism.
if a drummer stops when you slap and pop, it’s time to get a new drummer (The Beef nom de plume being a nod to Primus’ “shake hands with beef”, and an early 80’s US TV ad).
I just bought a new ibanez btb700 which slaps like you cant imagine. Oh, and per an earlier post i have a mastersound too because I play the guitar a bit for kicks. I like Josh Homme and my kids like Murray from the Wiggles, so the mastersound is perfect.
A Ric is the most un bogue guitar. Stunning.
Maybe a Gretsch- I remember the early 90’s & they were quite cheap,compared to now.
Google Deke Dickerson & check out his custom Joe Maphis twin neck. Wild .
Or Junior Browns Guit-Steel.
Most Bogue are the cheap Gibson copies with bolt on necks.
Or new SGs. No quality control. Maybe not bogue, just crap.
Anyone remember the fender elec acoustics cut in the shape of a strat? Bon Jovi fans only.
I found an Explorer copy in a cashies with James Hetfield Man to Wolf evolution stickers plastered over the fret board. Well played & must have caused much angst to hock. It was next to a Dimebag Dean with a flame paint job. Hideous.
Heh, I play a mapleglo 4003. They’re pretty cool, except for the fact that you absolutely cannot play a Rick bass live without some sort of preamplification. Maybe it’s because I’ve always played active basses before, but I remember being really annoyed at the low gain. Plus, it’s not the most finger friendly bass around. Then again, it makes up for it with that sweet sweet tone.
The bass is the best part…. you can FEEL it! 😀
The bass is the goopy glue that holds the sound together; the bassist really is the bridge between the melodic instruments and the rhythm section, as they have to understand both disciplines quite well to form a cohesive and interesting bassline that melds the two sections.
One can get by without a lead guitarist (q.v. Ben Folds Five), or one can forgo a drummer on the rare occasion (at least in popular music anyway). Unless one is playing solo accompanied by their own (usually) melodic instrument (bass sounds pretty tedious on its own too often), without some bass instrument—most commonly a stringed instrument, but also either wind, vocal and/or percussion, almost any music sounds anaemic and thin.
It is what gives music some body, so like you said V2, you can feel it…when I played last night, I could feel my instrument driving the songs along with the drummer: nothing beats that feeling, when you know that you’re the one along with the drummer that makes up the engine room for the band.
BOT,
The first time I really appreciated the bass was when I heard Kyass (Now Queens of the Stoneage) live, many moons ago.
They started the set with ‘One Inch Man’ & converted me instantly…..
A lot of my music taste is probably ‘low brow’, but nothing gets me into the painting ‘zone’ faster or more completely.
I avoid art societies etc mainly because I don’t see the benefit of dissecting the works of others. (plus the bitchiness & backstabbing!) I paint the way I paint because that’s what I like, though admittedly, I would one day love to have a few lessons just to get some pointers….
I certainly couldn’t stand there & listen to some ponce dribble on about somebody’s “blue period”, or their cerulian fantasies,
That’s not art, that’s fleecing the gullible!
No, give me the music with tons of bass & a few sticks of chalk & I’m in heaven….
Where does one go to view painting so pure? I oft imagine a world where people can be free to create without feeling the need to conform. A world devoid of herds of pseudo hipsters in thick rimmed glasses or cheesecloth layered art fraternity grandmothers standing around spewing forth pseudo intellectual bullshit- mostly about ‘inspiration’, ‘movement’ or ‘period’. When someone utters the words ‘transitional piece’ I feel this rage move through me, and it takes all my strength to not approach to them and scream “listen fuckwit, sometimes people just create because they have a drive to express ‘themselves’, not because they have a drive to impress quasi intellectual wankers”.
Have a go at using a bit of Primus or Tools’ Gay Rodeo as foreground music and see what your brush puts down.
I couldn’t agree more AshR, click on my avatar pic to see some of my work….
Tool is VERY good for Frogs!
I’ve never claimed to be ‘normal’ 😀
When we play at exhibitions, we are not averse to playing seriously loud…we’ll often open with a very raucous version of Uncle Bob’s “Maggie’s Farm”, crank out the slide for “Dear Doctor” and do a mean boogie with CSNY’s “Woodstock”, so yeah, no pretentious “gallery” music here to speak of. And our crowd love it, often hanging around long after they’ve had their fix of visual art, plus no one’s yet complained.
Maybe it’s the set we hang around with or perhaps its a refreshing change from all the usual Japanese drum troupes and synth monsters based on Brian Eno’s ambient albums that are typically accustomed to in these settings, but they all seem to like what we do, even if we play a little rough around the edges at times.
BOT, That sounds MUCH more fun than the usual dreary “see how out there I am” music that’s often at art shows. Or that infernal Muzak forest sounds crap.
I like rough around the edges, it’s often better than perfect just because it’s achievable to more listeners. I regard art the same way, I’d rather humour & life in a painting than perfection.
I’ve a long way to go, but one day I’ll have lessons & hopefully be able to hold my own with the “real” artists”.
Like Uncle Bob infamously instructed to The Hawks at the Manchester Free Trade Hall in 1966, in response to the “Judas!” comment: “Play it fückin’ LOUD!”, skewering those who thought that he should forever stay in the Folk ghetto.
I think I’ve solved my problem BOT!
I found a site that generates the artist’s statements…
Arty Bollocks Generator
Do you hate having to write your artist statement?
Generate your own here for free, and if you don’t like it, generate another one.
For use with funding applications, exhibitions, curriculum vitae, websites …
Thanks for the tipoff, V2…not that I’d even worry about such nonsense. We just play for the pure love of playing, and if we score gigs—not that we’re actively searching for them—that’s just icing on the cake and just another excuse to kick out the jams and maybe have a few others simply enjoy the bit of music that we play, so they can join in our fun too.
Jimmy Page used a Telecaster quite a bit live and in the studio with Led Zeppelin. Page used a strat. quite a bit on Presence and In through the out door . Page has talent. He has proved it.
But of course no strat setup would be complete without the bogan’s Boss DS-1 Distortion Pedal and a Marshall Double-stack. The stack of course would have to meet the criteria of being WAY too big for said bogue’s bedroom, meaning he would have it CRANKED all the way up to…..1!
What do you think the distortion pedal is for????? Stick to Kumbay-bloody-ah on your nylon string. Pooftah.
Slash was playing a Gibson Les Paul though, like it is shown on the picture 🙂 Clapton plays a Strat …
#2
I believe Slash is holding, and always used a Gibson.
#3
Gold, as always TBL!
I can think of only one other instrument that the bog an has a closer bond with, but it”s certainly not polite to comment on that particular pastime…..
Strangely enough many bogans are loathe to “embarrass” themselves by playing air guitar, but give them a plastic replica “strat” , & they wiil happily demonstrate their musical prowess for the err… “enjoyment” of everyone.
@Michael I think that’s the point (read the Tags)
233, so good they had it twice!
Nice work, TBL, but a pendantic quibble: this entry should be #234 (Schadenfreude was #233). 🙂
Haha, thanks! As we say at the top, bogans like more things than we initially suspected. TBL
your way off base on this one !!!
Slash has always used a Gibson Les Paul…unless TBL is saying that bogans can’t differentiate, and think every famous guitar is a Strat. If that is the case, my apologies TBL.
Oops, sorry, my bad, just realised what you did…feel very stupid.
Yes indeed, Slash has a distinct preference for the Gibson Les Paul. In regard to the Stratocaster sounding thin, it depends upon the pickups that it is equipped with. I have one with a Seymour Duncan JB humbucker in the bridge position and it sounds far from thin. The tonality of any “strat” also depends upon the amplifier used and the signal processing that is utilised.
You do know that you’re only allowed to replace stock pickups with EMG Actives, right?
I actually don’t think a strat is a bogan guitar at all. This post is a fail… sorry guys.
I agree. Mark Knopfler is a subtle guitarist and made his name playing a strat.
TBL has lost the plot on this one.
Sorry, this went straight over my head. What was the joke?
And in this week’s episode of …
THE BOGUE & BOGUETTE SHOW!!!
Bogue, Boguette, Aiden, Braiden, Jaiden and Kaiden pay a visit to their Member of Parliament – and, as is always the case with Bogue, things go horribly wrong!
Check it out here:
http://bogueandboguetteshow.wordpress.com/2011/07/01/episode-24-the-tethers-end-part-1/
N.B.: I’m not posting the episode here because I couldn’t be bothered fart-arsing about with HTML coding any more. It’s tedious!
The only thing missing is the Bogue screaming about “Moi constitutional rights under the fiff amendment n’ that!!”
ooh, a cliffhanger…
Not sure about that one Urban. I have a sneaking suspicion Bogue showed some powers of reasoning. That can’t be right!
Very nice. I especially appreciate the Bogue’s choice in outfit and his surprise that he might still be cold…
When the hostage situation is shown on the news, I have no doubt the clip from TT/ACA showing Bogue threatening his missus will get another run.
Bogue. Our very own Cory Worthington
This is the world’s greatest guitar.
Nothing wrong with Les Pauls, especially when they’re in the hands of a genius like Neil Young. Nice Bigsby too, though many LP players actively dislike them; Bigsbys work best with something like a Gretsch Country Gent or Duo Jet, where the twang of those guitars meld nicely with those tremolo bridges.
It’s all about what you do with it, not what guitar you play…put any decent guitar into his hands and something worthwhile will spring forth. Put a ’57 Goldtop, Martin D-45 or a ’65 Rickenbacker 360 (jangle city, here we come!)in the hands of some dufus bogan, you’ll be lucky if they can put the chords of A, D and E together, managing to make even the 12-bar blues (if they could even do that) sound bloody awful!
Too right Bag’O. In the hands of a genius anything can sound good. Put the same guitar in the hands of say Mark Knoffler and it will just bore the cr*p out of you.
: )
Or Eric Clapton once he got off the horse.
Oh yeah, Tears in Heaven anyone. He has been boring for about 40 years now though.
Yeah, makes you kinda wish that he kept that apartment window shut (howls of “boo” for poor taste).
That also equates with when he gave up the smack in ’74, to hook up with Patti Harrison (Beatle George’s ex-wife; he still remained close friends with Eric, referring to him as his “husband-in-law”) and recording his “comeback” album (well, more entry into AOR for the masses) 461 Ocean Boulevard), which set the pace for much of Clapton’s subsequent output since, only stepping back into his bluesman mode when reverently paying homage to some great before him.
In castigating him for his sins since the 70s, Clapton WAS God back in The Yardbirds, Cream and Derek and the Dominoes. Or at least damned good anyway.
There’s one guy one would also have wished not to give up the drugs.
I’ve just read Clapton’s autobiography. They say that you should never meet your heroes – because you’ll always be dissapointed. Maybe biographies are the same. He came across as boring and nasty.
BTW, he does say that when Conor died, he wasn’t in the room at the time. He was actually out on the street, and got a call from Lori saying, “Conor’s dead”.
Reminds me of a verse from TISM’s “Geniuses Are Turds (Extract)”:
Heroes seem so from afar
But if you meet ’em, you’ll think twice!
Genius is different from the rest of us—
Most of us are nice!
Didn’t realise the semantics that it wasn’t Clapton per se who left the window ajar. But still makes one wish that that hadn’t happened to him, aside from his personal loss, insomuch as that that tragedy was grist for the “Tears In Heaven” mill.
He was still doing something right artistically when he recorded the score for “Edge of Darkness”. He had however blotted his copybook by this time, by expressing support for the National Front around the time of and following the Brixton race-riots. He pointedly declined to recant those statements. and so far as I know, never has. I don’t know about boring, but I would agree that there was some nastiness there.
if i could go the rest of my life without hearing dire straits again i would be a very happy camper.
Amen P’bee.
My dad had the Brothers in Arms album. I still start convulsing when the opening of Money for Nothing comes on. And then f*cking Sting pipes up.
I KNEW you had good sense P’bee!
Add AC/DC to that list please, & anything by Jimmy ‘I can scream’ Barnes…..
Cmon, most of what they have done since Bon Scott departed has been awesome. Hells Bells f*cking rocks!
Perhaps….I’ve simply heard them to death Simon.
So many friends, when they find out I’m a metal-head, play the stuff non-stop so I’ll feel at home.
If only they knew the stuff I DO like! 😀
It’d give them nightmares…..
Maybe – but the vocals – jesus! Here’s a trick: next time you play AC/DC, stick yr head up close to the speaker and listen carefully to Brian’s singing – he has this spot in the middle of his throat that he holds onto and just SQUEAKS – i kid you not, it ain’t singing, it’s squeaking. Bon really could sing – listen to the Valentines doing “Peculiar Hole in the Sky”.. or Ride On, off DDDDC.
What a load of crap.
Not a Fender, not a even Stratocaster.
You’re talking about a Les Paul.
Definitely unfollowing you now!
You aren’t funny anyway…
You wil be missed……..
#4
For those people who slag the Stratocaster I have three words for you.
Stevie. Ray. Vaughan.
But I prefer the Gibsons meself.
Midnight Oil, Pink Flloyd, RHCP. Or was Pink Flloyd a telecaster? Probably both.
Now there’s a gay guitar, The Telecaster.
Nicer sound than a Stratocaster, in my opinion. Thinline Telecasters are even better still.
I don’t know what Bruce Springsteen or Dave Faulkner (now there’s a guitar with serious road wear on it) would have to say about that, martin…
Agree with Min though: SRV made his Strat wail and howl in the sweetest possible way, perhaps the best axeman to wield the Strat ever.
I think they look dorky. But yeah they give a much fuller and solid sound than the strat.
One of my bandmates plays a tele, as well as cheap-but-effective hollow-body archtop jazz guitar and yes, a Strat, amongst other oddities, like a tenor guitar, an oud (a Middle Eastern lute) and a dobro. The other has a Les Paul with PAF pickups and a Fender Jazzmaster, which has some tasty tones plucked from it, as well as a lap steel for some smokin’ blues. We also had someone who plays an mbira (a West African thumb piano), blues harps and a jaw harp. The drummer has a Gretsch kit, along with assorted percussive instruments and a Handsonic electronic drum.
My compliment, besides the Rick, consists of a cheap double bass, a Hiwatt combo amp and a Sigma (Martin’s short-lived cheap brand) 12-string acoustic, as well as Big Muff Pi distortion and Bass Balls synth-wah effects pedals.
With all these instruments and more, we play a rather wide cross-section of songs, mostly covers with a few originals thrown in. We do it mostly for sh¡ts ‘n’ giggles, as well as a weekly opportunity to let our hair down, chat, have a few spliffs and kick out the jams, but we do get asked to do the odd gig for a laugh, of which I’ll be doing tonight—we are all artsy types, having such disciplines as painting (acrylics, oils, watercolours, pastels), intaglio printing, jewellery making, sculpture, woodcarving, poetry and photography amongst us all, so when one of us or any of our colleagues and acquaintances hold an exhibition, they’ll call upon us to provide music for their opening nights, which is a great chance for us all to revel in such convivial surrounds with other
libtard fellow travellerslike-minded artistic folk, where nary a bogan and their attendant glassings are to be seen.Please BOT, don’t terrify me & say you know how to ‘talk’ art?
You seem so normal….. 😀
I can and do, but I keep my feet firmly planted on the ground and keep my head out of my arse.
Nothing wrong with being able to discuss art, given its entirely subjective nature, but I don’t get lost in its pretentiousness, or the precious nature of some of those for whom they stake their living on it (of which I don’t; you need to be very levelheaded when you work in disabilities!).
This is the primary reason why I chose not to become a professional photographer: Perth is such a small scene, that work can be hard to come by, therefore most of the photographers I knew were jealously guarded about their little patch of turf they held, thus they came across as such petty and pretentious arseholes and I really wished not to be a part of that, for I’m far more collegiate than competitive, which I find much of the former in a most positive manner amongst other musos. Besides, I couldn’t handle being having to subsist on shooting weddings full of bridezillas and drunken groomsmen and naff corporate functions. Shove that.
Agreed BOT, just do photography as a hobby, that way you’ll keep enjoying it.
Mind you, just THINK of the wealth of TBL pics you could get…. O. second thoughts, no….. You’d have to endure hell to get them! 😀
I’m… a little biased, because I play a Tele, but I think they look BRILLIANT. A bit boxy, perhaps. Nothing that can’t be jazzed up with a few circular mirrors, a la Syd Barrett. I prefer the finishes, too. (That Joe Strummer signature Tele that’s been ‘pre-distressed’ notwithstanding. It’s as bogan as acid-washed jeans. And, you can’t keep the f*cker in tune!)
They’re certainly brighter* (*see ‘twangier’) and more dynamic than Strats.
Teles are great , strats have their place. I spent 20 years on a strat with a brief affair with an Explorer.
you toucha my tele I breaka you face ;-P. Telecasters are amazing guitars. I have two !
I own a Strat, and love it to bits. I think the bogan is more likely to buy one of those black axe like stringboxes so that they can pretend they are the lead guitarist from Slipknot? Either that or they learn to play the intro from Metallica’s One and then shelve it after realising they might need to study a modicum of music theory.
‘Fuck learnin’ chords and arpeggios and that shit, I just wanna rip it up.’
+1. The bogan is more likely to buy a $300 piece of shit, try and learn to play for a few months then give up. $1k for a decent strat is way more than the bogan wants to pay. You can get a good plasma for that or a holiday in Bali.
So, what does my Ibanez Gibson SG copy say about me? I bought it in a pawnbrokers in about 1985…
It says you like ACDC and or Black Sabbath and have really small hands to be able to play it.
Now thats’ funny…I truly have the biggest hands of anyone I know!
I know that Angus Young plays an SG with an especially small neck, but they’re not all like that.
To be honest, I hardly play anymore, but when I did it was mainly Hendrix, Cream, Led Zep and so on. I got into Black Sabbath a bit later – top stuff!
Are Gibsons smaller? I have small hands and was given a Les Paul knock off that I find far too heavy to enjoy playing. I was probably also turned off it by a bogan-in-law saying “Slash plays one of those”. I had to keep saying to myself “I’ve seen Andy Partridge play one” but I’m wary and suspcious of the guitary wankery suckatude possible with it, and keep ending up using the acoustic instead.
So are SG’s smaller / lighter? There’s that whole ‘Hey Bulldog’ video that makes them look fun. Of course I’d rather have a Rickenbacker, but operating on a tight budget here, and my stuff is chamber pop most of the time anyway.
Ibanez copies of Gibsons from the 70s and 80s are somewhat sought after, believe it or not…I once had had a mid-70s copy of an ES-345 copy, which had quite a mean sound, but I sold it in 2002 after realising that my allegiances were better served to those of the bass clef persuasion…the phones ran hot, selling it for more than I initially asked in the classifieds ad.
That was the first guitar I ever played! … in about 1974 or something, jesus christ, how did I get so OLD??? – and I’m only 44! PS. I have no opinion as to whether that particular guitar was “good” or not – but all this technical yak yak on this particular post is 90% wank – as long as you’ve got a decent set of strings and a decent amp, a good guitarist can make ANYTHING sound good, vis. the “guitar” Jack white makes in “It Might Get Loud”.
That’s precisely what I said here about the guitars in relation to its player, to wit Neil Young: mind you, most cheap (≤$600) guitars are a bitch to play, with poorly shaped necks and ridiculously high action. But anything semi-decent—heck, even a really good, yet affordable copy—will sound great in the right, or least, sincere hands, whereas if you have some ignoramus whose sole aim is to cut fully sick shredding will manage even to render a nearly-magical vintage instrument to sound like rubbish.
Maybe some of us who are musical might rabbit on a bit about various permutations of various classic guitars, but do not confuse our esoteric ecstasies for wanking, for some of us can tell the nuanced differences, having immersed ourselves into the music to that extent…I think you’ll find that most of us are sincere and in spite of our individual preferences, we respect completely what other musos play. That is the kindred spirit of musicianship that keeps the kinship strong amongst our fraternity.
Unfortunately, many bogans (notably excluding those who’ve also taken the time and effort to learn and play, but just happen to have lowbrow tastes) don’t “get” that sense of camaraderie that one fosters when you regularly jam and gig with others, the sharing of experiences and ideas and the ability to read each other’s cues when extemporising.
This, is a n exquisite example how it’s done: the ability to both sing and play delicately together is the true measure of musicians…look at the subtle cues David Crosby and Graham Nash use when playing “Guinnevere”: it’s very clearly evident that both are totally immersed in the performance, as well as being proof conclusive of the deep friendship of these two men, which endures to this day.
I once bought a squire strat, I was going overseas for a while and just wanted something to play that wouldn’t be noisy like an acoustic guitar so as not to annoy my flatmates and neighbours. Id sit at home and play it and think, its not so bad, then Id pick up my RG which goes for close to 3 grand and the difference was immediate, all you had to do is pick it up and you could tell that compared to a good guitar a cheep one is nothing. In the end, after having it overseas, in Jordan, I decided I couldn’t be bothered lugging the piece of shit all the way back to Australia. I gave it away through a friend living in Jordan to a young Jordanian rocker, apparently he just about came in his pants when he was told it was his for nothing. Id like to imagine he is using it to shred out sick solos even now. I bet he gets it sounding alight
See, the comments both here and on facebook are the reason I don’t hang out here much anymore.
I could take this as an opportunity to show off my awesome guitar knowledge and offer some wankerish opinions, but instead I will just say ‘nice post dudes’.
Finally – some sense. Are the car-related posts as contentious/wank-festy? I doubt it… Why do men have to turn everything into a technical showdown. I’ve been playing guitar for 35 years (jesus…) and I neither know nor care what a “neck-thru-body construction” is – yuck.
You must have played all the big stadiums!?
Is there a bag limit applicable here?
TBL, do you tag & release or despatch with the oar?
Ye, that’s a Gibson Les Paul in the pic alright; and it, with Angus Young’s Gibson SG , would surely be the bogan axe of choice, and the shape you see in GuitarTosser/Hero, or whatever it is.
Not your best work TBL, but one mistake is allowed in a very good cause.
#5
And heres me thinking the bogan just synced to covers and never could actually play.
Oh, James Hunter, and heres (sic) me thinking you were going to weigh-in with a detailed account of your first year of guitar lessons at Tighes Hill, Newcastle Campus (where you made the strings of your Aldi semi-accoustic cry no less!)
Every 10 out of 10 Australian bogans are found to be severely deficient in their absorption of irony and miss out on their daily dose…
That’s some pretty concise schadenfreude there, Glasser Simon.
Think we’ll hit the magical double figures before the comments peter out?
Here’s one more to kickstart the second half:
Hey, wait a minute guys, isn’t that a Les Paul? Really dropped the ball on this one guys. I much prefer your earlier stuff.
Now be honest Kwanzaa, you’re sitting there snickering, waiting to see what Simon will do when he runs out of fingers….. 😀
KKK,
Para 2 : Is that ” before the comments peter out ”
Or did you mean ” before Peter comments out ”
Sorry guys, couldn’t help myself. !
Oh, James Hunter, crank-up your axe and rock-on, dude! Good Lord, you wear blue eye-shadow (in a very non-ironic way) and belong to one of the country’s most unspeakably boring carny shows and yet expect to be taken as a serious artiste. Sorry to hear about it!
#6
Just for you KKK.
Interesting to see what does happen when we get past 8 V2.
They can perhaps feel the nasty splinters of some cheap copy guitar wedged into their foreheads, then not care whether its a Les Paul or a Stratocaster.
A cheaparsed guitar is as good as a jagged glass, Simon…time to expand your repertoire to wood!
Bit of Pete Townshend action Bag’O?
And why is anyone who displays knowledge and passion for a subject called a wanker? Smacks of anti-intellectualism to me.
I think in this case Simon there are many who have missed the entire point of the post and simply taken the opportunity to show off their mad guitar knowledge. Turnips is not included. (I love Turnips).
Bogans love Strats because they know the name Strat. The end. It’s got nothing to do with the quality of the guitar, the people who use them etc. etc.
Hey Shirl, good to hear from you. It seems many simply read the subject, glance at the photo and blast out a comment that completely misses the point, love it.
Did you miss me? I missed you, and a few others that frequent here. Have I missed anything notable?
I really wish people weren’t so dim and falsely arrogant.
Of course I missed you Shirl. You are a missed contributor. Viv put in a cameo a while ago as did Pinky. Whether you missed anything depends what else you have been up to but like anything there are some very funny threads and some flat ones.
Human nature being what it is it’s usually the dim that are most arrogant. I point and laugh. The alternative is not worth it. Stay cool Shirl.
If I’m not cool, I’m nothing. 😉
Shirl,
I find some of them to be dim and supreamly arrogant.
The realisation of ones fallibility is one of the first signs of maturity. others seam to believe that a conviction of ones infallibility is the sign of a real man. pity there are so many of the later.
You Shirl are truely cool as and we have missed you.
Aww shucks. Thanks JH.
Shirl,
I’d send you a big MWAH except because of my averodupoise it may arrive as a FATWAH !!!
Boom tish!
Hello Shirl! Me Loves ya too…nice to see you ’round these parts.
Thanks for making an exception for me in regards to those who wax lyrical about their axes: I’m quite passionate about what I play, but I completely respect the sincere choice and sound of others, horses for courses I say. I know what I like, but I wouldn’t expect others to follow me: if they like it, brilliant, if they don’t, oh well.
At least you know how to get good mojo out of your guitar: I was especially fond of your cover of TISM’s “Professor Derrida Deconstructs” 🙂
It’s funny Bag’O, never picked you as a TISM fan!
Tokin’ Blackman (R.I.P., you amazing axeman) was a very versatile guitarist, being trained in classical guitar in The Netherlands as well as being proficient in myriad styles; he knew his skills were somewhat overkill for TISM’s requirements, but he didn’t mind playing in their style, as he loved being in their bandito band of brothers and being a part all the grand fun they had together. Besides their anonymity allowed him to pursue in manifold musical activities out of the band, such as being in a blues outfit, of which was his first love.
He too was not averse to the chiming charms of the Rick twelve-string, which he used to great effect in “The Men’s Room”, in the warped campfire chorus of “I’ve gone and pissed 30 years up against a wall”.
Yep, but not with a Rickenbacker, as he was wont to do back in their raucous mid-60s heyday! Must have cost them a fortune and would’ve frustrated Francis C. Hall (then-CEO) no end, after all the effort that was invested in crafting each instrument.
A cheap Magnum or other no-name brand found at any Cashies will nicely suffice…just don’t forget to do a windmill action prior to ramming said axe into the bloodied sensibilities of their neck or forehead.
And Pete Townshend is something of an intellectual type too, giving away rock stardom for a couple of years to work as a literary editor for Simon & Schuster in the mid-80s. But the bogan intent on slamming an instrument in anger will not remember or even know this tidbit when trying to emulate their latest maxtreme rawk idol.
Anti-intellectualism is one of the defining hallmarks of all bogans…speaking of matters pertaining to understanding bogans, here’s one intellectual, Prof David Nichols, who set about to author a book called The Bogan Delusion, but really ought to know better about this topic. His complete misses the point of what defines a bogan and thus questions the existence of such a subset of society, dismissing it as some classist tag to hang on the lowbrow masses.
He might live in Broady, but this doesn’t qualify him to speak about them…well, he certainly never had to step out of being condemned to boganism in his youth, thus he reeks of the inner-suburban prat he originally was, making the inchoate insights of the commenters of this blog more coherent. His observations appear to be based on the classic OSB traits; in both the ABC Radio interviews he’s been on, both the Life Matters one and the one on Thursday on Conversations With Richard Fidler on ABC Local Radio, never once has he referenced TBL, which I believe is at the bleeding edge of understanding the metamorphosis of the bogan from the OSB of yore, to the exponentially-more obnoxious NaB and CUBs of today, who have little-to-none of the humility and fundamental decency of their forebears, but share their ignorance and narrow views, but now feel compelled to impose their views as the “truth”, as verified by their latter-day “success”, turning now wilfully ignorant. The philistinism is no longer merely an accident of circumstance, it is now actively fostered. He does state that the bogan appellation is a nebulous one—to that, I can agree—but the core negative behavioural traits, of which are all-the-more proudly displayed these days, are what defines one as a bogan in this day and age. So many journalists, commentators and academics do not realise the subtleties, thus getting bogged down into the visible markers of what gets one lumped as a bogan, ergo they get lost in the smoke-and-mirrors of a phoney class war, instead of perhaps seeing boganism as deleterious philosophy of life that left unchallenged could even harm humankind’s very existence (Lord Monckton is someone I’d call a bogan despite his peerage, given his hostility to reasoned debate re climate change).
This is what Prof. Nichols sadly does not recognise…these interviews and the book that he’s promoting would’ve been estimable in 1997, but now they just look dated, not accounting for their mutations into even-more virulent strains.
(To the editors of TBL: has this author ever approached you in his research upon the bogan phenomenon? If not, he’s seriously in the dark.)
I heard a snippet of him Bag’O. He seemed to miss the point I thought and, as you said, was viewing it as a class thing. The problem with these libtards is they look to see divisions and ‘isms in all things and miss the core point.
I heard that episode of Life Matters too – very frustrating to hear Nichols miss the point entirely. Host RIchard Aedy and those who called in weren’t much help either. I left a comment or two on their website mentioning TBL, but by then it was too late.
Lord Monckton sees all. Tell me those bulbous eyeballs don’t give him 360 vision…
A fundamental trait of the politically conscious bogan is comparing everything you don’t like to Nazism…
Another bogan trait is discrediting a person’s opinion on account of said person’s grotesque appearance…
So it looks like we’re even, Monckton. But the war is far from over…
In fact, the jury’s out.
If you are in Perth, you can currently see that guitar (or one of them) displayed in the Temporary Exhibitions gallery at the Museum of Western Australia. In the gift-shop area outside they are selling all kinds of dubious merchandising, including PaperJams guitar-simulants (and the accompanying plastic amplifier-shaped objects).
Posts between the original thing I was replying to (RobertL at 14.41.30 hours on the 1st of July, relating to Angus Young’s possession of a Gibson SG guitar) have made this post from yesterday something of a non-sequitor. It is this guitar, however, to which I was referring, currently viewable at the West Australian Museum, as part of an AC/DC exhibition. Judging from the size of stage costumes also on display, particularly the Superman costume, Angus Young is a surprisingly small man, and his hands must be proportionally small. The narrow neck therefore seems well suited.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n5NlEdyQoVs – Jonathan Richman is a bogan? His tribute to the Fender Stratocaster is awesome, but I thought he was an indie rock/post punk icon from New England?
-Brimstone
Nuh, bogans love Gibsons, for the following reasons. They believe all the hype about is being ‘American = automatically good’, the set neck is better than a bolt on, you don’t get coronary heart disease from Maccas, and that the earth is flat. If you go to America you will hear all this redneck (yank for bogan) nonsense, promulgated by superannuated hippies with bandannas. The reality is that Nashville and Memphis are dangerous dumps; Route 66 is a bunch of decrepit towns with $2 shop Chinese oven mits, fridge magnets and assorted ephemera of ‘the good old days’. Graceland should be renamed ‘DisGraceland’, avec $2 shops, and they have only just barely managed to not fuck up Grand Canyon by banning the fast food outlets from advertising within 2 miles of it. Imagine ‘KFC’ sprayed on the walls of it……hmmmm, they came close.
Bogans believe all this crap about Gibsons being ‘superior’ because they are made in the ‘good ole US of A’. You should see all the homes, mostly trailers, that have flagpoles with ‘USA Love it or Leave It’ or ‘God Bless Our Troops’. That’s what bogans love; insular parochialism and no facts (explains Today Tonight and ACA). The Gibson Les Paul was discontinued in 1962, and only commenced to be reissued from 1968 onwards. It was never all that popular in terms of actual sales. Until Slash.
Bogans hate ‘strats’ because they have bolt-on necks and are therefore ‘for poofters’, and lots are made by Mexican ‘wogs’. USA Fender strats are made in Corona, California (a spit away from the Mexican plant over the border), Japan since 1984 (they are actually the best ones), Korea, and Indonesia, India, and now China. BTW, Gibson USA is in Nashville Tennessee for electrics like the Les Paul, Montana for acoustics, to correct an above post.
Bogans love Gibsons for the ‘big fat humbucker tone’, not those sissy single coil Fender strats’. Bogans love Slash because he wore dirty jeans, looked like he needed a bath (appeals to biker-style bogans) and a top hat like the outlaw they’d like to be, or one of Vinnie Barbarino’s mates (Guido Bogans, even though Slash’s name is Hudson). The funny thing is Slash used a relatively cheap copy of a Gibson Les Paul, made by a luthier, on the awful first album that shot G&R to success. It wasn’t a Gibson at all.
And by the way, to the guy talking about Rickenbackers above , they are now made in China in amongst other countries. Yep, the expensive USA ones are available, but all major brands manufacture off USA shores now too.
Some research needed for topics is advised TBL, I guess guitar nuts are as staunch as Bogans! But with facts.
Ahem, no, Ricks aren’t made in China. All the electric guitars, basses and mandolins are made in Santa Ana, where they have always been made, whereas their built-to-order acoustics are crafted by a luthier in San Francisco under exclusive licence since 2006…that is the full extent of their outsourcing of manufacturing. They even create their own custom machinery and make much of their own electronics in-house.
Besides, I think John C. Hall (RIC’s CEO and co-owner) would not dare cheapen the tradition of this institution through tampering with both the cachet and the strict quality control that keeping the manufacturing in California and having one (very high at that) tier of products confers to this brand. He even regularly participates in the company blog, offering useful advice to Rick players around the world. And as much as the allure of being able to clear a massive production backlog by offshoring to China may seem appealing at first, the buyer backlash would completely negate all the credibility of the brand when things go wrong, which would ultimately sink the brand (some only-recently resurrected brands suffered this fate back in the 70s and 80s when that temptation became too strong)…say what you will about Rickenbackers,—whether or not the combined aesthetics are to your taste is not the question—but one constant has been the consistent high quality of their product, meaning you can buy any vintage in very good condition with complete confidence, meaning that there are no lemony years to avoid, unlike many the Fenders of much of the 1970s that suffered under CBS’s corporate beancounter whims.
Get your facts straight before you even consider taking on a self-confessed hardcore Rickenbacker nut like me. We are a very passionate yet respectful and reasonable bunch I think you’ll find, before you feel so inclined to slag us off any further. Anyway, well-executed style delivered with good taste (both sonically and visually) remains forever classic, which is the antithesis of the bogan’s desire to be transiently thrilled by catching the latest wave, only to be beached once the tide ebbs away.
Methinks you are mistaken sir. No matter. But the posts/topic is about bogans isn’t it? You may have time to digress and use the blog as social mechanism and that’s fine, but I was trying to link to the general topic, and to the premise of the website. cheers Graeme
It must be hard being so bitter. Enjoy playing your toilet seat with a cricket bat nailed to it.
“on the awful first album that shot G&R to success” ?? Appetite for Destruction was and still is the highest selling debut album of all time so I’m guessing the rest of the world thought it was awful aswell?
People didn’t love Slash because he was dirty they loved him because in a time full of make-up and glam rock, although there were some great bands coming out of this like motley crue or cheap trick or even def leppard just to name a couple, this was a band making good rock and roll without relying on teased hair, lipstick and repetitve harmonies in every song.
.
I can play guitar a little, but have never learned to play properly. I have a couple of acoustics lying around that I plunk on from time to time.
I was once offered one of those Guitar Hero plastic things at a friend’s house and was completely hopeless. When I figured out what one was supposed to do with it I was appalled. I’d assumed the game tested basic guitar skills! Not so. Guitar Hero is to actual guitar playing as Dance Dance Revolution is to actual dancing. The whole scene was very depressing. I mean these guys were spending hours on this crap when they could have been learning to play a few chords on a real instrument. Surely that would be more fulfilling?
Nah, yer miss out on all the cool maxtreme graphics and points when you play a rool guitar.
And besides, you can’t plug a rool guitar into a PS3 or Xbox.
I don’t play Guitar Hero because i already waste my life playing videogames. I don’t want to be reminded that I could be learning how to do something like play guitar with that time.
I agree, you can’t even use the drums properly. Like how you sort of cross your arms over a bit so you hit the high hat with your right hand and the snare with your left. I can hold a basic beat on the drums but I suck at guitar hero drums.
I only recently went down the shops to get a hotdog for lunch but ended up acting on long suppressed urge to buy a guitar…. Early onset of mid-life crisis kicking in I think.
Anyhow, the music store guy was very patient and helpful and showed me a Fender acoustic. Even though the only thing I know about music is how to turn on an Ipod, I had an inkling that Fender equalled Bogan and brought a Yamaha instead out of principle.
Aside from that, I really suck at guitar and despite practising 45 minutes everyday for the last three weeks and getting complimentary lessons, I fear that my repressed bogan gene from my mothers side of the family will kick in and the guitar will soon end up in the wardrobe next to the ‘ Farsi for beginners’ books
Well, you made a good purchasing decision there…Yamaha make decent entry and mid-level acoustic gutars, whereas the ones from Fender aren’t really that much chop. And their basses aren’t too bad either in the segments they occupy; a top-shelf five-string Yamaha would be a good compliment to my Rick.
There are some things Fender indeed do make well currently available, such as Strats and Teles (if you can’t afford an American Standard, the Japanese ones are pretty darn good), Jazz basses (some of the reissue models are almost lustworthy) and more-faithfull of the reissue guitar amplifiers. But their acoustics are ho-hum at the price and their modern bass amps are dreadful (with the latter, it’s really best to find a pre-1983 valve-powered Bassman…now they sound the bizzo!).
That’s a nice story Blue, how was the hotdog?
I never got around to getting the hotdog. On the upside, music has already saved me from possible high blood pressure!
Still not sure why I brought it, I just saw the shop and before I could stop myself, I was walking out of the shop…
I gave up on footy this year, so instead of training, I don’t mind the idea of strumming a few tunes while winding down after work, but fear I’ll have long being pensioned off before I can get some tunes down pat.
One thing I’ve noticed, I’m listening to music more carefully now, I set myself the challenge of playing the 13 second intro for Bughouse’s ‘Hell for Leather’ in three months.
Yea, Blueballs,
Just play the guitar for the pleasure of playing the guitar, it’s great therapy. I play for a living and I get the most fun with “widdling” away…not necessarily playing a song, just playing the guitar and listening to it. Yamaha are very good at the entry level stuff…good buy.
Music isn’t a sport. If it was bands would play songs with every member going as fast as they can. The first muso to finish the song…WINS a trophy and moves onto the next heat. World champion might be the one who finished “Stairway to Heaven” in 2 minutes flat!!!
Duelling guitars with taps.
Oh James Hunter, just because you live among the rude’n’rural rednecks of Lower Dogpatch, don’t go getting all nostalgic for a deliverance-style rogering!
I’m the same Balls except I have never acted on that whim. I love the idea but I know in my heart I have zero musical talent and lack the patience to get anywhere near competent.
If I could not mimic Joey Santiago’s squalls on Vamos within a month I would quit in disgust.
Sometimes I’ll lust over a Fender Jazz bass on the internet when I’m drunk, but I can’t be arsed with music anymore. I much prefer peace and quiet when I’m sober.
Yamahas get a lot of respect but the Fender would have been cooler imo.
It probably took me about a year to be reasonably competent.
Martin, I have a Jazz Bass and it’s just beeyootiful. Dark sunburst with a tortoiseshell scratch plate. And cheap! Got it off ebay, and Aussie guy selling from Japan – $750 with everything but a hard case. Needed a set-up – but what new guitar doesn’t?
BTW, surely the ultimate boguitar is anything by BC Rich? They’re revoltingly ugly but have lots of exciting pointy bits which, for the bogan, signify HARD. Especially when the hideous thing’s named “Warlock Metal Master Tribal Fire” for fuck’s sake – you get the picture.
I’ve has three strats and guys, they are fantastic, it’s a brilliant, unpretentious shape, look and set up – plus they cost about a third or less what you’d pay for a Les Paul of any stripe… though someone’s prob already said this…
I agree. The bogans back in my day all liked Metallica and Sepultra and all that thrash and death metal shit. So they liked guitars like Washburn and anything garish and tacky.
crap post. no lol’s… and slash doesn’t play a fender stratocaster, numbnuts. he plays a Gibson les paul which sell for as much as 50,000… way beyond the price of a plasma screen.
#7
Keep ’em comin’ folks!
James those who can, do
Those who can’t comment!
solid gold
I think I might own the least bogan instrument of all: a 1984 Rhodes Mark V
Beautiful…I love the unique sound the Rhodes produces. To me, like the Wurlitzer electric piano, ARP String Ensemble or the Mellotron, it’s the amongst the ultimate “raspberry cordial” instruments, insomuch that they’re imitations of an original, but have their own flavour that can be enjoyed in their own right.
The bogue would hate the Rhodes, given that it can’t replicate all sorts of other instruments, doesn’t have a demo mode, has no illuminated keys to show it the way and can’t play one-finger chords.
Yep. Examples of what I hear when I put it out on display:
“Nice synth”
“Can you get it to make an organ sound for this track?”
A nice video showing what the rhodes is all about for those who are interested
There is some maxtreme playing towards the end
Love the way they can sound delicately chiming when played gently, but have the trademark snarl when given more attack.
Even tastier with some judicious use of either reverb or distortion through an amp.
Rhodes has been resurrected as the Mk 7, which means no one has to fork out big money for a vintage one with lots of potential issues, unless of course that is what one so desires. True to the original, but with some modern touches that make it even more user-friendly, such as better reliability and optional active sound, self-powered speaker stands and MIDI.
Great to see that they’ve returned, as many keyboardists have craved to have one, but had difficulty getting their hands on one or have had to put up with a synth with reasonable emulation, but still missing the feel and ultimately, its purity of its unique sound that can only come about with the physical action of the hammers striking aluminium tines.
Chamberlin FTW! The mellotron is an inferior knockoff. I’m startled by how realistic a chamberlin can sound, when played creatively.
I’m fascinated by the limitations of the Mellotrons and Chamberlins. Even when using an emulator, you’re forced to think creatively because of the clunky action of the notes and the restricted range of the keyboard. Any kind of pad sound swamps a mix, so it becomes about passsing tones with the left hand and melodicism with the right.
I’ve always wished I was in the Zombies or the Left Banke, so it’s keyboard heaven for me. And i just know one of these bastards is sitting somewhere in some Vinnies Op Shop out whoop whoop with people having no idea what they’re sitting on. Argh!
OK, nerd fit off.
The Chamberlin is also magnificent (sorry I forgot to mention it in my “raspberry cordial instrument hall of fame”, where an honourable citation also goes to the Clavinet too…think Stevie Wonder’s “Superstition”): “Nights In White Satin” by The Moody Blues features the flute section of one, of which the selfsame machine was used by Crowded House in “Into Temptation” for its haunting flute melody.
Close. The flutes on ‘Nights In White Satin’ are Mike Pinder playing an M400 Mellotron.
The ‘flutes’ on ‘Into Temptation’ are producer Mitchell Froom playing an M1 Chamberlin. The difference is more readily-apparent in the highly realistic ‘string arrangement’ – the 3 violins and cello all played on the same instrument – that would probably fool most listeners.
It’s weird to think it was designed in the 1940’s, since digital samplers have only recently come close to that kind of realism.
I stand corrected…thanks for the details, Bosch. Both are sterling examples of what can be done from a tape replay keyboard.
Would you, perchance, be a habitué of Planet Mellotron? Loads of detailed info as to where one can find the haunting sounds of said instrument.
If you haven’t checked it out, I strongly suggest you do!
Yeah, the site’s awesome. From reading I’ve figured out they’ve been in just about every song I loved since childhood, even songs where it wasn’t readily clear, such as the saxes in ‘Coming Up’, the strings in ‘Space Oddity’, or the flutes and strings in ‘Life Is What You Make It’, all the Michael Penn album etc.
I’m almost scared to ask BOT…. What do you think of the Theremen?
It’s one of my favourite instruments, though many haven’t heard of it.
It’s so versatile & unique, with a sound all it’s own. Quite addictive!
Used by Marilyn Manson through to the (shudder) Spice Girls, it can’t compare to the bass for importance, but for atmosphere it can’t be beaten…..
“Good Vibrations”, anyone? One of the best uses of this sound, methinks, as well as being one of the all-time great groundbreaking singles, which only exists in mono, as some of the multitrack stems that were used in this multi-piece sound collage had gone missing (pity, as that’s one song that’d sound great in 5.1). I love the sound of both the Theremin and the Tannerin (which is what was actually used by The Beach Boys, played by its inventor, Paul Tanner)
Really, but its used there’s no action left in that keyboard
I don’t know nuffint about geetars. Can any of youse caarnts tell me wot sort of bass is used to back up Bootsy Collins. That shit is raw…
Bootsy plays a “Star Bass” – custom made for him alone I believe. Nothing else can handle Bootsy’s level of funk.
I like your idea of Chevy badges on the SAAB. 🙂
I thought of doing the same on my Vespa. Not that it’s a GM product of course. But the thought of being targeted by bogan road rage put me off a bit.
Surely with a Vespa you would be a fair bogan target in any case ?
Pretty much! My other idea was to put the long horned cow head sticker across the back. That seems to be another bogan favourite. (Is it the R M Williams logo?)
Maybe a set of dead steer horns mounted above the head light ?
AND a Kenworth mud flap at the back with a chrome reclining nude on it ??
I toyed with.the idea of putting Chev badges on my bicycle and wearing a jersey that said “I don’t pay rego on my bike” but was advised by the good folk here that it would be suicidal. I offer you the same advice.
I’m on the bicyclists side, for the most part. Because I used to like riding and because I hate it how a lot of motorists hate bicycle people. Usually because they’re so disgusting and unfit that they’d die if they ever had to ride more than 50 metres.
Except for the other day when this libtard woman with a feminazi attitude expected me to let her ride in front of me so she could get a good run to get up the hill that was approaching. She was a libtard with a bogan attitude. I think she expected me to hang behind her going 20km an hour but I went around her.
Martin,
Other problem is so many bicyclers either do not know the road rules or feel no compulsion to obey them. They deserve getting underwheeled !
Oh, James Hunter, after that pearl of wisdom I’m surprised it wasn’t you who said, “We will decide who comes to this country and the circumstances in which they come” – JH aka James Hunter.
Adrian Belew has done interesting things with a Stratocaster. But I think he prefers a Parker Fly these days.
Adrian Belew???
I didn’t know he was a guitarist.
I thought Fripp was the guitarist.
in moments I’ll know even more….
well far fuc&ing out.
I didn’t know none of that.
King Crimson’s best – Discipline & Three of a Perfect Pair.
The guitar on Discipline changed music for me forever.
and this is probably the best song ever written…
until this song.
Isaac Brock uses Wicks Guitars.
http://www.wicksguitars.com/
You just can’t beat the bass….
Agreed!
did you like modest mouse too?
outstanding tune.
it’s everything which ever went before it and then some more.
the pinnacle of pop music.
graet band.
I do indeed!
Sad Sappy Sucker was my first taste of them, but by no means the last…. Great band! 😛
I reckon BC Rich is a way more bogan brand; they sound like shit but they appeal to the 14 year old boy in us all: http://the-guitar-store.net/wp-content/uploads/2009/02/bc-rich-warlock-tribe.jpg
So this is why all these meatheads get paid so much? Because people play pokies?
http://www.smh.com.au/national/nrl-weighs-into-pokies-brawl-20110703-1gwxg.html
I’m not surprised.
It’s the same here in the local league. The clubs with pokies have the cash to run a good team, the others struggle. This is where my inner libtard comes out. Ban the f*ckers. All they do is cause misery for the morons playing them..
Simon,
Any society that encourages the means for the weak willed to lose their entire wages in an evening is sick The state Governments are the most guilty continually expanding the number of gaming machines and the number of venues in their tax addicted frenzy.
If extra taxes are needed then they should have the balls to say so and to apply the taxes in a socially equitable way.
Sorry, I know, too sensible.
Maybe we should all frequent the clubs much more and sabotage a macvhine each per night ?
It’s a good sentiment JH except I would rather gouge out my eyeball than go within 100 m of one of those places. Let’s just nuke em.
The WA State Government, under the somewhat draconian will of Colin “Barney Rubble” Barnett, seems to model itself upon the police state antics of the dark days of Bjelke-Peteresen or fellow “WestERN Australian” Wiberwal Charlie Court, having become the first State to ban Kronic, not to mention coming down hard on regular cannabis users reintroducing laws that were in the statute in 1981 (when Charlie was Premier, incidentally).
One thing I suppose I should be grateful for is that it’d be very unlikely that he’d let pokies become legal beyond
Packer Palace WestBurswood Casino, of which has bipartisan support, having seen the damage it has caused other States, all in spite of the thirty silver pieces they have sold out for in a revenue stream. I feel that WA has got it right there, insomuch as not completely outlawing poker machines, distasteful and pernicious as they are, but by keeping a short leash on their availability and being tightly regulated in being legal, which permits a strategy of harm minimisation, which is exactly what I advocate for any activity that could be considered a vice (i.e. alcohol, tobacco, drugs, prostitution, gambling and fast food).I am firmly of the “no advertising, regulation, taxation and harm minimisation” in making available all those aforementioned activities, that they all be available, but in a well-regulated manner that while discouraging anyone to take these up (thus banning any advertising or sponsorship by these concerns), allowing the safest use of these without needless criminal repercussions and if those habits get out control, be afforded rehabilitation and recovery funded by the “idiot taxes” from revenue garnered by their consumption.
Oh James Hunter, is Lower Dogpatch the last word in civilised society? Based on the fact that you reside there I very much doubt it. And further to your theory as to what constitutes a healthy society: a thousand carnies voicing a thousand ill-informed opinions should, in fact, be met with a thousand raised truncheons.
Every thing James stated makes perfect sense to me Peter. You disagree just for the sake of trying to score points, not realising that you sound like a complete turkey!
You have better suggestions? Please share them….solve this country’s revenue problems, without sacrificing the weak & we’ll all be grateful.
V2, Pete has been cyber stalking JH for well over a year and no amount of abuse or pleading will distract him from his self alloted task. Good luck!
Thanks Simon,
At times he sounds almost intelligent, but I guess it’s just an illusion…. & he hangs it on James for ‘carnie’ tricks?
He obviously has a real thing for James! I wonder that he can’t see how much he appears the spurned, adoring acolyte….
When I like someone I tend to jump to their defence, as do most of us, but I can see there’s no use appealing to Peter’s good sense, he has none!
I shall try to bite my tongue, because my reaction possibly fuels his sick obsession….
There….didn’t that sound sensible? 😀
Vviv2,
For me the circus (carney as some would have it) is and has been a hobby. Mind you if I were younger I would be tempted to do it full time although that means the people that are available for cast and crewing have to come from a different group. Our genre is caberet more the “Salon Kitty” style then the Lisa Minelli thing.Being a definitely adults only show we hardly would call ourselves “carney” which has a much more family friendly connotation. Go to http://www.circusbizarre.com.au if you have not previously done.
As for Pete Babe’s problems, manifest though they are,I realy try to avoid engaging with him as it always make me feel I’m taking a gun to a knife fight.
Still everyone in life needs some useful persuit and if haunting the blogasphere bemusing people is his then at least it keeps him amused and so has served a usefull public service.
I have seen your site James, & it looks like a great show!
Petey always reminds me of Frankie Howard playing one of the woe-begone muses on ‘Up Pompeii’….”Oh The pain, THE PAIN!!”
You take it all in a much nicer way than I think I could, which in turn shows that you are a better person all round than Petey, who can only see the negative….
Every time I read one of Peter Thornton’s posts, I hear the voice of Doctor Smith from Lost in Space.
Oh, James Hunter, I believe Bertrand Russell made quite the compelling argument that our intellect allows moral decision and, hence, the ability to make decisions based upon reason. As usual you will probably have a little think about what you’re posting and later adopt the same line of reasoning I usually present. Only without poise and wit. Although with your ever present and appalling butchering of the English language. I concede that it’s possible – though hilariously unlikely based on probability that you’d never turn up – that you’d ever need to take anything at all to a fight, by which I mean you’d probably run like a scared rabbit instead of standing your ground, but when you start posting the truth as opposed to your bog-standard delusions of just who, and more specifically, just what you think you are, get back to me. Until then, sit down.
Don’t take it so hard, oh, mental colossus, while you don’t make much of an advocate for intelligent design, specious reasoning seems to be your strong suit.
With pre-selected spending limits, clubs and clubs will have to review their business plans, I think. They found a way to operate as profitable enterprises before fruit machines and one armed bandits proliferated in such numbers.
There must be a way to continue to be worthwhile business with a different balance of income streams (a ban is not what is being discussed at present, the effect of current moves will only decrease revenue from gambling, not choke it off entirely).
The smart operators will be considering how to do this, as I speak.
From what I can garner, the gambler can select how much they want to lose – therefore someone rolling in money can select as much as they want, or even someone less affluent can chose the same action. I think the pre selected limits are to stop someone who aims to spend a set amount from ‘chasing their loses’ and ending up withdrawing money they don’t have.
I find it amusing for Gallop to say it will “severely damage rugby league” not to have people do this, but not worry that it will severely damage people and their families who have become addicted and end up owing far more than they can afford.
Bah Fenders,
My metal flake electric blue RG Ibanez is the way to go, flat neck for shredding action.. although it isn’t as nice as my mahogany Warlock 🙂
Mate it with a tube screamer and a messa stack then drop C it then you have a wicked Hardcore combo. mmm Takes me back to my highschool days playing in hardcore and thrash bands.
You can take your popular crew and shove it, when girls find out you play in a hardcore band, that’s when the party starts.
It’s tragic that I know this, but one of the selling points of 2007’s ‘Guitar Hero 3’ was that Slash was playable in it, and that it came bundled with a Les Paul style controller for maximum wannabe wank value. I guess Bogues can tell them apart.
really running thin on ideas lately, this blog has jumped the bogan
Bogans like the strat because you can smoke the pick-up- it’s made from cheap plastic!!!!!
Me and My Band have sold our guitars and bought turntables.
No clam bakes for you philistines.
TBL: Nice work on being in a bogan montage on last nights “the worm” on channel 10…
The herpes-ridden nuffbag who wrote this piece of shit clearly doesn’t know their arse from their elbow. Seriously cunteyes, you might wanna consider getting checked for Down Syndrome if you think Slash plays a Strat. A fucking retarded mountain goat could’ve done the two seconds of required research on Google. I use to get the occasional giggle out of this site until I read this fucken douche-nozzle rubbish. Thanks for wrecking my week period-stain, I am wishing un-cureable ball cancer on you and your extended nuffbag family as I type this. Cunt.
Normally this wouldn’t get through moderation, but I think the mid-bending stupidity of this (and the profane eloquence – kudos) deserve an audience. TBL
TBL
Thanks for leaving it in, good for a giggle,
Maybe it is yet another name for Peter Thornton ?
Hmmmmm The stupidity quotient is right but the eloquence is too out there.
#8
#8 and probably the best.
My only criticism is the use of the term ’nuffbag’ twice. Very lazy.
Fark you, TBL carnts. You bastards had to put the one post I could really, truly have spent hours posting on while I was away, didn’t you – carnts.
strats are played by the best guitarists in the world for a reason. if you think they sound shit, it’s your playing, not the guitar. malmsteen thinks you’re all fuckwits. also, slash played les paul. knowledge fail. perhaps it’s time to get at least a mildly intelligent person to do these?
#9
agreed. Hendrix was not a bogan , in fact he was too cool for school and he was a Stratocaster king.
I love this site, but I can’t believe they actually posted this article when a key part of it is so clearly made up, even many bogans would know slash played a les Paul…
#10
Bag-o-turnips you are a massive douchebag, as much as any Bogan.
“Modernist ethos of form following function—while being primarily a product of the latter, the former aspect can still be appreciated in its own right and like great Modernist architecture, still remains gracefully timeless in its purposeful minimalism.”
You said that. You’re such an enormous douchebag. Get the fuck over yourself, soul patch. Also you are pretentious and boring and fat. I bet when you play all a person can hear who isn’t YOU is “jesus this is pedantic crap”.
I mean seriously Bag-o-Turnips you disgust me with your bloated, utterly unfounded ego that’s been set to stew in a bowl of rancid pee, which is a metaphor for your self-obsessed pedantry. You are so ridiculous you’re outside of the realm of definition.
TBL,
Sorry to be a pain and add to the general disquite with Peter Thornton,
But is this “Chilly Willy ” yet another iteration of the aformentioned abomination ?
Oh, James Hunter, there’s an easy way to trace the ip address you Luddite. Sorry you’re so challenged when it comes to even the most basic technology. Also sorry you’re a flabby dole recipient desensitised to reality by a lifetime of washing down (read, abusing) psychiatric drugs with rotgut wine.
Yep , the ‘ monger’ in the spinal tap type picture is holding a Les Paul.
I have real 1991 USA Fender stratocaster in my growing guitar collection and I am the last person on earth to be a bogan a since I don’t eat meat , drink booze, I like John Coltrane and I am know 3 languages and counting.
In fact Hendrix played a Strat and he was a trippy bad ass motherfuc*er on the guitar , Not a Bogan , Chav or sub neanderthal monger at all.
#11 – They just keep coming, amazing.
I wouldn’t have believed it Simon, but I think you’re going to get your dozen! 😀
I’m getting there. Where ya bin Viv2. Can you please watch the new 2 1/2 men for us and report back?
There are an awful lot of stupid people about, great huh.
Simon,
We need them. Well at least big business needs them to work at mindless jobs and to consume everincreasing loads of crap.
I’ve been in SA, photographing the Flinders Ranges…BEAUTIFUL! Took a flight over Lake Ayre (2 days before the ABC chopper crashed). Back home for a week or two then going to Lightning Ridge to pick up some paintings.
When is 2.5 men on? Have they started a new series?
Simon,
I doubt that they are comming off the boats so there must be someone breading them ? Maybe in a cage farm someplace.
Or Queensland?
Simon, Good call. Feeding them on the discharge from the Bundy factory so would not cost much. They realy woul;d be “Happy Little Vegamites “
Do you know…I really think you’ve hit the nail on the head James!
That explains so much about our northern state….the driving, the outback towns, the incredible crime rates….
Got passed by a bogan in Mitchell Qld once who had Dwight Yokum playing full bore through 2 HUGE sub woofers. They sure are ‘special’ up there
As pointed out in nearly every post above, Slash plays a Gibson Les Paul, not a Fender Stratocaster. The one he is playing in the image is his signature model and retails for around $5K+. As the Les Paul’s were originally designed for playing jazz, they have a thick broad tone that is entirely awesome when played through a Marshall JCM 2555 amp and it’s matching quadbox (or any good 2×12 or 4×12 with V30 or G12M celestions) as Slash does.
Fender Stratocasters are an awesome guitar and are so versatile that they can be used for just about any musical genre from country to blues to hard rock. Some of the greatest guitarists in the world play them.
Vintage Les Pauls and Strats such as a pre-CBS 1954 Fender Strat can fetch well over $100K and are in a class of their own.
The cheapest new Fender Stratocaster is a ‘Made in Mexico’ and retails in Australia for around the $800 mark. They are still a good guitar, but they don’t have the value of a ‘Made in USA’. You can find some cheaper every now and then but mostly, it’s all up from there.
Maybe the article should stick with the Guitar Hero idea and not delve into things that are clearly misunderstood by the author. Although the concept is good, there are some glaring errors that should be rectified. Simply put, these glaring mistakes and assumptions make this site look like it’s been put together by a bunch of corn fed Grade-A export quality knob jockeys.
best post ever TBL. The fun never stops.
Good God #12
Who would have believed it!
Do people actually READ things anymore…or skip every other word? Wanna try for a baker’s dozen by November? ^_^
ShirleyM,
Hasvent seen you for a while !
What’s the fuss about an odd squawk box or two ?
USA made fender strats are not a patch on G and L axes.
Thanks , I’ve recently been looking for info about this subject for ages and yours is the best I’ve found out till now. But, what in regards to the bottom line? Are you certain in regards to the supply?|What i don’t realize is in reality how you’re not really a lot more smartly-liked than you might be right now. You are so intelligent.
What on earth are you talking about ? Only thing that make sense is that you find others to be so intelligent !
G and L guitars = bogan free zone
🙂
It’s a Les Paul dickhead!
#13
It’s the gift that keeps on giving.
Speaking of Stratocasters I don’t understand why bogans like Dire Straits. They seem to go for the ” Brothers in Arms” LP and the “Alchemy” Live set. The clever and literate lyrics and quiet, reflective moods on the early first 2-3 records must go over their heads.
Makes no sense. A strat is about the one guitar a bogan wouldn’t own. They are much more likely to have a jackson, ibanez or washburn. Maybe a Gibson.
You guys never cease to amaze me. You knock it out the park (do bogans like sports analogies ? Been a while since I looked the full list over) time and time again. Then you come out with some shit like this or your FIFA or Broncos post.
Quality over quantity guys, just cos a bogan can be laughed at doesn’t make a joke funny