Alecia Moore first entered the Australian consciousness a decade ago, with an R&B by-numbers single called “There you go”, in whose video she rode around on a motorbike and gave bad girl attitude to an X-boyfriend. The bogan liked this, and propelled it to #2 on the Australian singles charts. It was just the beginning. Since then, Pink has had an additional TWELVE solo singles chart in the Australian top 7, but only three in her native USA. So what’s she been doing that gets the antipodean bogan so damn enthused? Shitloads.
Pink met her husband (a motocross racer) at the 2001 X Games, and has since acquired the ability to ride motorbikes. She used this skill to woo prime bogan love-object Rove McManus, allowing a national TV audience to witness her teaching Rove how to be x-treme. Rove reciprocated by fawning shamelessly, and exhorting his audience to supply Pink with their bogan bucks. You see, Pink speaks the bogans’ language. She rebelled against conventional literacy and social norms by titling her second album “M!sundaztood”, and regularly spells her stage name “P!nk”. The bogan appreciates the gesture, as it considers itself m!sundaztood also, LMAO.
Primarily, Pink’s marketing strategists targeted teenaged female bogans, with a defiant message of how unique and uncontrollable she is. The teenaged female bogan empathises with this message, and is controlled by the marketers into buying yet another concert ticket, and buying yet another album to be unique, just like the other individuals in Pink’s target demographic who have sent the thing 10x platinum. P!nk (lol) undertakes stadium tours of Australia every seven minutes, allowing the fans to always have something new to purchase. This is always accompanied by another spruiking visit to her favourite little buddy on Channel 10. Then, as the adult femme-bogan wants nothing more than to be a teenage femme-bogan again, they embraced P!ink with a similarly slavish enthusiasm, waxing lyrical over how ‘cool’ and ‘empowering’ she is, effectively demonstrating how tenuous their grasp of those words was.
In the same way that the bogan trusts Pink with its money, it also trusts her as a source of both domestic and foreign political knowledge. The bogan’s knowledge of international relations was augmented by her track “Dear Mr. President”, which commandeered populist anti-Bush sentiments. She also (on behalf of PETA) lectured the Australian wool industry on the practice of mulesing. She later admitted that her position was “bullshit”, saying “”I probably could have done a lot more (research)”. The bogan forgave her public misinformation campaign, because she was “so real”.
Five albums in, she toured Australia again in 2009, selling over 650,000 tickets, mainly to bogans. Her ability to fleece the bogan had become unsurpassed – topping John Farnham’s Whispering Jack tour for the most Australian shows in a tour, including a record 17 shows at Melbourne’s Rod Laver Arena. What could possibly be left for greedy Alecia’s bogan cash vacuum? Her management pondered this, and eventually found the answer. She has recently signed a three year contract to be the face of V8 Supercars (the trans-generational bogan institution), including a special effects-laden TV commercial. A commercial that features her baring her midriff, chomping down on an entirely non-phallic sausage, falling into the arms of a big, strong V8-man, readjusting her breasts and a midget. The very embodiment of female bogan empowerment. That’s right, not content to surpass Farnsey in ticket sales, she’s decided to go after his rusted-on baby boomer audience, and cannibalise him completely. He’ll be tickled pink.
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I notice alot of bogans wearing p!nk attire since attending her concert((s) – TBL).
I think you may have brought up the chicken and the egg paradox.
Did she choose her name to appeal to bogan types or do they find an appeal through association to her?
google why p!nk called herself p!nk.. you will be amused.
Yes, a cheap, desperate for attention tart with little talent making money off the hairy chequebook
Ha, Hairy Chequebook
I’m waiting for the usual suspects (Fiona et al) to get this party started.
LOL. A particularly well chosen subject and expressed a little better than usual too. Also, “ticketsl” needs to be fixed. :-)
Thank you, Fiona. TBL
LOL. You know it would have been remiss of your beloved Fiona to have not pointed it out.
meh! got nothing against her, rather her than some over synthesized plastic bimbo who mimes her concert, or some reality tv winner…lift your game TBL.
I think the boganity of Pink lies in how she constantly sells out. She’s not just trying to sell femme bogues some songs and some idealism: she’s selling them everything from mobile phones to V8 Supercar racing.
She’s basically a modern day, less skanky version of Madonna – only rather than selling sex, she’s selling everything else but.
I’d still prefer any of my future children to look up to her as opposed to Lady f**king Gaga…
That’s not to say I want them looking up to pop stars. I’d much prefer them to idolise someone of substance if they are going to idolise any one other than myself :)
As opposed to a classical music graduate? You’d prefer they emulate the girl with the body tatts and motorbike? Where are you from, Bayswater or Croydon?
where are you from Andrea?
Yeah, this strain of the thread is misled. Lady Gaga is, indeed, a better role model than P!nk and as for “synthesized plastic bimbo who mimes her concert, or some reality tv winner”: they’re all artless, highly marketed product — you just can’t see it because you fall so squarely into P!nk’s demographic :) but not the others’.
The word ‘synthesised’ does not contain a z. American spelling is one the of know signs of a bogan.
come now any sise fitx all ??
yes me too. Sure bogans love her I sure prefer my daughter listens to Pink than many of the other porn star esque bimbos that pass for ‘singers’…
did she really do 17 shows at rod laver arena, LOL
Yes. According to unconfirmed reports, she verbally and physically threatened arena staff if they booked her for a lesser number of shows.
It’s also a symbolic number, because that’s the average IQ of a P!nk fan.
you’d believe anything if you think Pink was talking to Laver staff herself
Good lord – 17 shows! Had no idea she was so popular. Been away from the big, brown land for too long. This may be incentive to stay away a bit longer.
gee you global citizen please stay away (tosser)
The bogans are coming. The bogans are coming.
I’m not really a fan as such, but I can’t really say anything bad about Pink.
I was taken to one of her shows by my ex (not a bogan, just evil incarnate) and I have to admit she puts on a hell of a good show. With, like, real singin’ and that.
It probably bears pointing out that we carry no cross regarding her talent and performance skills. Indeed, we admire her authenticity in that regard, to some degree. However, her ability to appeal to the lowest common bogominator requires pointing out. Bogans like her, hence we must discuss. TBL
I can see the phrase “lowest common bogominator” really taking off TBL, one of your best!
lcb, ha!
Yeah, I get that.
I just had some crap to say on the subject.
P!nk – I worship at the alter of your bogan fleecing abilities.
The popularity of “Funhouse” confirms that bogans are cloth-eared. I had the misfortune to hear this clipped-to-death piece of rubbish on a proper stereo system which plays cds. Bogans are so used to listening to their compressed, squashed downloads that in generations to come young people will wonder what the music REALLY sounded like.
wow!!! it the whole vinal vs cd’s, version 2.0
See Greg Milner “Perfecting Sound Forever”, in which he discusses the loudness wars.
Grrrrrrrr!! Don’t get me started on modern records being ‘brick-walled’. Because then the name ‘Metallica’ will come up and then things will start to get broken.
She’s definitely one of the ‘clippiest’.
Look out, like disliking TV, they’ll brand you Elitist for prefering Vinyl, showing their ignorance of a direct reproduction of a soundwave (analogue) vs a sampled (ie. heavily reduced) reproduction of soundwave (digital). No straight waveforms existing in nature but all over compressed CDs? Yeah, that sounds perfectly normal.
I love it when people who have absolutley no idea about mixing and mastering start talking about vinyls superior sound.
Vinyl doesn’t support stereo bass or low-mid phase shifting, has limited stereo expansion, has lower top end and doesn’t allow hard compression (I’m not talking about digital compression I’m talking about gain compression).
Take that vinyl snobs!
That ad is fucking badass though. The truck transformation bit at the end is neat
P!nk = Epic Bogan
Despite the fact she is from overseas (Canadian I believe) she has embraced the bogan psyche better than anyone else previously…
Her concerts are certainly action packed, and she is one fit little girl… I didn’t have the pleasure of seeing one of the 78.000 concerts here in Melbourne, but my wife did, and she said she was incredible…
The face of V8 supercars is a curious and interesting decision… Both from P!nk and V8Supercar corp. She’s a chick… She’s into a guy who rides dirtbikes, and she’s a chick…
Maybe their trying to use the flow of the bogan river o’ cash to head over to the V8Supercars… and maybe its to entice petrolheads (like myself) to drag their Mrs and Kids along to the races to share the glorious experience of ‘that sound’ that only a pack of V8 race cars can give…
I believe that P!nk should be worthy of worship by all those who strive to tear the lining from bogan’s wallets (or dole cheques)… She certainly has grabbed the throat of boganinity with both hands and continues to cash in…
Bravo Alecia (correct BOGAN style spellling)… Bravo…
LOL. You’re married? What are you, the Tiger Woods of TBL?
No – I don’t like golf… ;)
LOL. You seem to like swinging your club around though.
Agreed… but it isn’t a golf club… ;)
LOL. A putter then? :-|
His Wood?
I thought we were going to go down the track of ‘Neanderthal’ and clubbing… caveman style… ;)
But either way is fine…
so long as you’ve got ‘a grip’ on things Fiona – I’m certainly happy either way…
loftie,
you been reading fiona and my personal emails ?
Shame on you
Loftie,
I was thinking of the American usage (ie got wood). A club will be hard to carry up into your tree.
come on Fi’ , what’s Tiger Woods done to you ??
Fiona of Toorak… another of Tiger’s ‘Mystery Women’
“She’s a chick… She’s into a guy who rides dirtbikes, and she’s a chick…”
and she’s FOREIGN… ha
Not only is p!nk the ultimate in canadian boganism, she can’t sing either. How do people with such small musical talent make it to the top of the charts? It has to be bogan power. If only we could bottle it we’d be able to forget carbon dioxide pollution…
She’s not Canadian, but they do have bogans in the Great White North…
I believe the Canadian equivalent of a bogan is a called a ‘hoser’…
I’ve watched every episode of TRAILER PARK BOYS (What? It’s a funny show…) and I don’t think they used ‘hoser’ more than about once or twice.
I can’t remember the term ‘hoser’ ever being used in Trailer Park Boys. The show itself was my first thought when seeing pinks name. Unlike her, It is worth watching.
What an odd commercial – so many seemingly unrelated events within the ad make me think perhaps its loaded with metaphors/allegories that I simply don’t get because I don’t follow V8 supercars.
That commercial is to advertising as Boost Juice is to drinks.
that pink V8 ad is scary; it’s like 5 or 6 bogan wet dreams rolled into one. only thing she didn’t do was work in the mines, glass some kvnt and sing ‘khe sahn’…
Or wear Ed Hardy…or eat La Porchetta and wash it down with some Vitamin Water…
Or wash it down with a big can of Mother – although let’s not forget that Ed Hardy has a line of ‘Celebrity Energy Drinks’…
There are 2 classes of bogan in this world.
1) Your run-of-the-mill bogan that only knows the chorus part of khe san ie “the last train out of sydney’s almost gone”.
2) Then you have your true-blue, uber bogan who actually knows the lyrics.
Extra credit if they actually know where in the world khe san is.
It can’t be to far from Sydney if you can’t get there by train, I think it’s near Woy Woy.
too*
can*
Should make sense now, apology without excuse.
The laughable thing, as I’m sure I’ve pointed out before, is that Khe Sanh was a battle fought by Americans! The only Aussies directly involved were flying air-support.
Try telling that to the bogues though.
Careful Sten, some bogan will glass you for being an unpatriotic cunt!
“effectively demonstrating how tenuous their grasp of those words was”
should be “were” instead of “was”
Um, no. Grasp = singular. TBL
could be “is their grasp of words” ??
Seems ‘E’ got an ‘F’ in English
words (plural). Grasp is the verb.
It is like this:
“…effectively demonstrating how tenuous their grasp of those words was”
“their grasp of those words were” (correct plural sentence); and
“their grasp of that word was” (correct singular sentence).
The word ‘grasp’ is the verb and does not actually affect the sentence as a plural or singular.
Look- you folks write very well- usually flawless! Just wanted to point it out, that was all.
“P!nk (lol) undertakes stadium tours of Australia every seven minutes.”
LOL. So true. Imagine a P!nk ‘Last Time’ tour. She would need to retire for at least 5 years beforehand to give it any credibility.
Pink is so hardcore, bad and real. She reminds me of Avril Lavigne.
Great call!
I have watched with no amazement the bogan teenage girls I teach fall mindlessly under Pink’s spell.
And why not – with great lyrics like ‘I don’t play your rules (probably spelt rulz) , I make my own’ and ‘nah, nah, nah I’m gonna start a fight’ that the junior femme bogan can identify with it’s a surefire hit! These, by the way, are usually the dumbest girls in the class – and it appeals to them because, well, making your own rules is the way to go when you are incredibly braindead. Sort of like ‘what is 7 plus 5?’ – response – ‘fuck you I make my own rules!’ (read: stuffed if I know).
In addition, starting fights is something the dramatic teenage bogan loves (if I don’t understand it, I will break it).
Then you get the real thing the bogan girl can identify with – saying things like ‘I can fit your whole house in my swimming pool’ – while it dreams of the day they too will be like Pink…rich, famous…skanky.
Ah yes… “nana nana nana-na, nananana nana” is wedged into my brain because this is the disc that my sister had on repeat for SEVEN F_CKING HOURS while she got ready for her (2nd) wedding.
Yes, she’s a minor bogan. Married to a major one. She and I are adopted, from separate families.
There was a story on ACA/TT not too long ago where a woman had been outboganising her neighbours by singing a particular Pink song towards them.
The song featured a line “Ah’m gonna start a fight” which the level seven bogan seemed to shriek a bit louder than the rest while walking up and down the street.
It seemed the journalist was confused to which bogans to side with, on one side was a street full of people in agreeance that the Pink singer was at fault and on the other side there was a Pink fan.
classy – i know many people state that we need a TT/ACA entry, but upon some pontification i realise that it needs a whole site dedicated to it..i.e “shit i learnded off’ve (sic) TT/ACA”.
That’s probably why an ACA/TT hasn’t been written yet. Where do you start, where do you end.
It deserves its own sub-category.
Perhaps TBL or another talented individual/team could publish a weekly summary on the weekends.
That’s not a bad idea actually, I’m sure it could be quite successful.
I have to admit that ACA/TT are guilty pleasures of mine, I see it as great release.
ACA/TT needs to be #100!
I saw part of that story, as well as a promo for it…the promo made it look like the council was banning P!nk altogether
Just like ACA’s advertising for their “Chow Mein Meow” story that they aired last night purposefully alluded to the restaurant serving cat, which was actually not correct at all.
But why start being correct now?
Much the same FauxFacts Unlimited headlines, they try to grab your attention with unbelievable headlines and follow it up with unbearable ‘journalism’.
I missed the cat story, do you know what it was about?
a Chinese restaurant backing on to an alley that is popular with stray cats, mainly due to the scraps they leave out – strangely enough! Footage showed 6 cats eating food scraps.
There was also a government health report that stated they had sighted a cat in their food prep area (that is open to alley) during an inspection. Shame the cat was alive, that part got in the way of a juicy story.
Not at all sanitary, but not at all what their advertising alleged either…
Being an international relations scholar, that bit about bogans learning about world politics from Pink songs is very scary. All the more so, because it is most likely true.
Terrifying stuff.
The scary part is when they “get a schooner or 6 into them down at the local” and decide that they’re educated at a worldly level to the point where they’ll engage in serious debate about global issues. You know at this point it’s time to go as some c*nt is about to get glassed!
Thanks Mezz. I just got an image of a drunk bogan screaming, “What the fuck do you mean John Mearsheimer’s concept of off-shore balancers has no relevance to the shifting power balance in the Asia-Pacific region!”
pink is vulgar and absolutely repulsive. good entry
Err, doesn’t Pink normally “bare” her midriff?
I thought that “bearing” one’s midriff was very much an obese fem-bogue condition.
Valid. TBL
What you mean Sten?
I bare my midriff, and on stage, and I’m NOT fem/
boag and I think that secretely Fiona’s a bit keen on me ??
LOL. Who are you?
Fiona,
I’m sure I’v seen you in the front row at several of my shows. Pretty sure it was you ’cause you had your hands over your eyes.??
Have a private party(gigg) in Newcastle mid March
If your mum will allow you then we will put your name on the door. !
LOL. What’s your show? “The Wino Monologues”?
Fie on you Fi for not following these bloggs closley enough.
but to cut to the chase:
goto http://www.circusbizarre.com.au
and yep I’m the one with the concrete block on my head.! dont worry it does come off !
ps. parental supervission id recommended when watching and do not try what you see: serious injury or sudden death could result.
enjoy
LOL. Sadly, I believe you.
oh fi, sorry to come back to this ;but;;
I have always had the enfrontery to use my own name, not having any reason to be ashamed of it.?
She is, she always replies to you ;) Come on Fiona, admit it ;)
LOL. Ugh! As IF!
I’m honoured to have Fi on my team!
I am sure she will enjoy the show and who knows ,afterwards?
You know what they say though.”what happens on tour, stays on tour”
Come on Fi,
Time for the last round and it’s your shout
Two of her songs stand out to me.The first is Dear Mr President.Have you listened to the words?
The second is Stupid Girls, a very clever put down of the ultimate boganettes from Hollywood that grace the trashy magazines ie Paris and Lindsay.The film clip was very funny.
I think P!nk is X-tremely clever.
Having just read the lyrics (I would make a comment on her music, but being a Dylan tragic, I have forfeited all rights to do so), I would say that her conceptual understanding of international and US politics is somewhat lacking. While her critique of the Bush-era executive governance may hit several popular notes, I would say she has a little work to do yet.
Bush has been a great resource for the entertainment industry, I don’t think anyone can deny that.
Totally – Bush was comedy gold! How much material did he provide to comedians all over the world without even trying?
You shouldn’t misunderestimate Bush. After all, fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice… and, uh… well you’re not gonna fool me again.
If bush was so good for source material for the comedy circuit , why do we not have loads of material from the Joh era ??
don’t you worry about that!
Mark
did you realy get the disambiguity ?
I would be so disapointed if i were understood
A few local comedians did a really good job of moching Joh. Back onto the American scene, I think a lot of comedians were really hoping that Palin stuck around. The Tina Fey stand up material that was generated was priceless.
They must have been pleased when she landed that spot at Fox News as a “contributor”. What her contribution will be to news is beyond me, but I am sure she has made a massive contribution to the fortunes of comedians all over the world.
Well, if Chuck Norris can become a reporter for Fox News…
Al Jourgensen from Ministry (the industrial metal band not the ‘of sound’) once thanked the Bushes, both senior and junior, for inspiring his music. He noted that Ministry albums released during the clinton years were not as good as those released during Bushes’s presidencies.
It’s not much but maybe it counts as a redeeming feature of sorts?
Yes, those songs are very cool and empowering.
I am in complete agreement Jenni. Sure he lyrics might lack depth and articulation but she IS trying to appeal to larely illiterate consumers of popular music after all. ‘Stupid Girls’ is on the best pieces of popular culture feminist pontificatingand rebellion since Helen Redding’s ‘I am Woman’ .
“What happened to the dreams of a girl president
She’s dancing in the video next to 50 Cent
They travel in packs of two or three
With their itsy bitsy doggies and their teeny-weeny tees
Where, oh where, have the smart people gone?
Oh where, oh where could they be?
Maybe if I act like that, that guy will call me back
Porno Paparazzi girl, I don’t wanna be a stupid girl
Baby if I act like that, flipping my blond hair back
Push up my bra like that, I don’t wanna be a stupid girl”
We could have a real revolution on our hands of this kind of message gets through to the bogan mindset
We direct your attention back to her V8 Supercar ad. Lyrical pontification may feed her ego, but when it’s time to hook in some cash, she’ll clutch at a random V8 driver, run around adjusting her breasts, and attempt to lure the bogan to one of the least unstupiding events in the nation. The bogan does not acknowledge any hypocrisy in this. TBL
apologies for the spelling errors there folks.. *blush*
ok must watch the V8 ad. point taken re hypocrisy.
Sorry to all I have horrified.Have lived in Boganville(Toowoomba) for the past 5 years,and although I try hard not to mix with the natives,osmosis must be occurring(at work).Point taken.Will go and educate myself reading Helen Reddy and Bob Dylan lyrics.
Or is that reverse osmosis?
Boganmosis.
Whistling Nixie is in the country and in Joh speak country at that so maybe it is Myxamotosis
You will get no education from Bob Dylan’s lyrics, I am afraid. Confused, certainly, especially with gems like “I was so much older then, I’m younger than that now,” or “Buy me some rings and a gun that sings, a flute that toots and a bee that stings, a sky that cries and a bird that flies, a fish that walks and a dog that talks”.
And do not worry about the Toowoomba thing. I lived there for a long time, and pour scorn on bogans as much as anyone else. My partner even comes from mega-bogan heritage (Kingsthorpe), and yet in seven short years has overcome this to be a normally functioning member of society.
What I’ve found funny now is that Pink has become exactly what she was bagging in “Stupid Girls”. She may have some brain and hasn’t got exercise balls on her chest, but she’s become the bogan, sell-out, white trash that she was so against.
“P!nk (lol) undertakes stadium tours of Australia every seven minutes.”
??? I had the feeling that she hadn’t actually ever stopped.
Aaah Pink, the full boron moron.
She is a vegetarian which is also a non-bogan thing… so I’m waiting for the bogues to try and head into the vegetarian life to be like p!nk and “do it for the animals” – or their pet cat “sooty” and their dogs “spot” and “bazza”.
Never. Bogans love their meat. Their diet consists mainly of meat, and carbs. No vegetables.
Australian has always seem to embrace pop music the world rejects. If it weren’t for Molly and countdown the world would have not been stuck with ABBA and Madonna..and now P!nk (lol)
Both Abba and Madonna were widely rejected and laughed at but no stupid australians with a thirst for bad pop embraced them all. Never forget the classic footage of Madonna singing at Live Aid and drowned out in boooos.
We owe the world a big apology for consistently embracing bad pop.
ABBA is awesome!
Like Ben Harper and Jack Johnson who are much more popular here than in their native countries. Do surfies count as bogans or is the appropriation of surf culture by people who live inland a post in the works?
The beaches these days are filled with NABs.
Don’t get me started on what happened to Cronulla. When I was a kid in the late-90s and early part of this decade, it was actually a nice place to hang out – mostly a surfie crowd, with some families and people who were going to the beach for the right reasons – to hang out with mates, have a bit of a laugh and just relax. Sure it was overwhelmingly white, but there was very little racial tension. I learnt most of what I know from the white surfers.
Round the turn of the century, however, you get an influx of the roid monkeys who go to the beach just to look at chicks and get in fights (this is of all races, not just Anglo bogans). The fact that a good portion of said roid monkeys are racist led to the riots.
Once again we can blame the marketers.
I’d have to agree, I remember hearing a hard luck story and how she couldn’t conform into society when she was younger.
Apparently she didn’t want to play by the rules of record labels…. marketing genius.
Benny Hill, I thought you were dead? But you WERE awsome
My genius ‘nose no boundries’.
Re #26
Off topic, but win!
Agreed.
I see some people have argued that “at least shes not a plastic bimbo like Paris Hilton” but its the fact that she pretends to be hard/alternative/rock that annoys me the most. As some one who actually listens to rock/punk/alternative music and lives and socializes in what I guess is a “alternative music scene” it really grinds my gears when these bubblegum pop stars try to flog the badass rock image, at least the Paris Hilton types embrace their bubblegum pop image.
I’m actually a little surprised that P!nk gets an entry before Britney Spears, Christina Aguilera and the V8 Supertaxis.
Definate future posts
Ah p!nk – from p!ssy modern R&B to chart-pop to Avronicas-style pop-punk to p!ssy pol!t!cal awareness, and back. Is there anything she hasn’t done? Perhaps a bit of a str!pped back (musically speaking) tour doing seXed-up acoust!c covers of F!ve Bl!nd Boys of M!ss!ss!pp! gospel ditties is next on the agenda. Fingers crossed (Or f!ngers X-ed).
You mean F!ve Bl!nd Boys of A!abama
The two are oft-confused. You might be m!zundaztood, T-Mac. The 5!ve Bl!nd Boyz of M!zz!zz!pp! aren’t the old dudes that hang out with Ben Harper. Now if you’ll excuze me, all these z’s and !s are making my want to sleep loudly.
Big props for Avronicas. Intend to steal that.
It’s all part of the package. Marketing has dictated that you can be what ever you want when ever you want. Like you know, totally, like this weekend i am soooo going for the rock chick look..last week, like, you know i was rocking hard with my, like, you know 80s ray bans and stripey black and white top, but totally rock like this week you know totally.
Like yeah nah whatever..btw i might like totally like get a like tat too. LOL
The sad thing is..i have heard at 30 year old speak like that and not just on one occasion.
yeah fakers suck
you bastards. now i’ve got pink’s get this party started stuck in my head.
Always thought that song should’ve been satirised under the name “Get This Barbie Started” by that quintessential old-school VB-swilling bogue, Chris Franklin; who covered that ’90s Alanis Morrissette-esque song “Bitch” as “Bloke”.
Now I’ve gone and got a worse song stuck in your head, pb.
I’ve given myself many minutes of mindless entertainment by singing ‘Get This Party Started’ to myself, only substituting some of the first letters with ‘F’. ‘Getting this farty farted on a Faturday fight’ never fails to amuse.
The only reason I know any of Pink’s work is because I’m married to someone that spent her formative years growing up in the same bogan colony I did, only she appears to have a few more vestiges of bogan heritage remaining than I.
I stumbled on a Shirley Bassey cover of “Get This Party Started” while aimlessly browsing Youtube a while back. I have to say, it was comedy gold.
the replacing the first letter idea reminded me of a similar suggestion i heard to make hoobastank’s ‘the reason’ almost bearable (or at least funny): every time the word reason is in the song, replace it with the word penguin. so you end up with ‘i found a penguin for me, to change who i used to be, a penguin to start over new, and the penguin is you’. much more entertaining.
The things that really shat me about that “Dear Mr. Preziden'” song was that by the time she released it slating GWB had become so passe.
That song came out, IIRC, in about 2006 close to the time that the Dems cleaned up in the mid-terms (or shortly thereafter) and left GWB a “lame duck” President. By the time her song came out most other Hollywood liberals had moved on from being anti-Bush to being pro-Obama or -Clinton. I guess this fits in with the whole “bogans are always late to the scene of the crime” thing.
Though the song gave the bogan an appearance of being learned and political, there was one moment when the bogan thought that “P!nque” was saying that “it’s ok to be gay” – then it realised that, actually, “P!nque” was talking about Dick Cheney’s lesbian daughter. Lesbians rule (apparently).
Absolutely. One of the funniest songs in that song is when she accuses Bush of “not knowing what a hard days’ work feels like”. Let’s think about that one for a moment: P!nk is a pop-star, flying around the world doing shows in front of thousands of screaming fans. The worst mistake she can make is bringing out a record that bombs in the charts. W was the President, trying to manage America and its’ interests for 8 years straight, despite protestors and extremists who wanted him dead. The worst mistake he could make would be a decision that cost countless lives…
Yeah, P!nk really knows what a days’ hard work feels like!
Another great post.
As a UK person I read all posts as though they are written about our chavs (or neds in Scotland). They pretty much all fit – all you’ve got to do is change some of the brand names or ‘local’ celebrities.
PS. There is some debate over the origins of the term ‘chav’. I am with those that believe it is an anacronym for Council House And Violent.
I find the bogan and chav similarities are like the Galapagos and Madagascar giant tortoises. They’re oceans apart but seem so alike.
Not having had any personal experience with chavs, I tend to like them more, mainly because they have funnier sounding slang like ‘murkle’.
Stupid pink. That song Mr president was the most annoying thing I have ever heard. Do your research before you start slandering something. I am definetely not pro bush but that song nearly swayed me (luckily it didn’t).
Jo, I completely agree. I listen to the same sort of music as you and pink trying to come accross as “edgy” is beyond a joke.
Perhaps Pink could write a song for Xiapelle Corby ala Dylan’s ‘Hurricane’.
A little piece of me just died.
I’m sorry James.
I hope my joke didn’t murder any of your sense of humour, it wouldn’t be the first time. One day I’ll get charged for atrocities to comedy.
Also I think I posted that reply to the wrong person, it should’ve been to you because you like Bob Dylan. While his singing divided many, he is arguably the greatest song writer of last century.
Me too.
*Was meant to follow James’ but too late, I guess.
I dislike Pink. She’s common, obvious and unashamedly crass. If I’d known of her before she became Pink, I’m certain I’d have disliked her then too.
James Hunter you cad.
Peter It is so loverly to be appreciated by someone of taste and circumstance
To everyone who says ‘oh she’s not really that bad…’ or expresses any like sentiments, you have missed the point of this entire blog. Stop reading.
no. I havent missed the point of the blog- I get that she’s an entry because of the way bogan culture has embraced her. I was responding to some of the other posters who had denigrated her.
But she needs denigrating. Her fake rebel, look at me I’m cool because I have tattoos and pretend not to care shtick is almost as horrible as her bland safe music masquerading as edgy. Her real genius is she also appeals to the male bogue in a Robbie Williams kind of way.
I don’t think anyone ever said she was edgy. I don’t think she even claims to be edgy. Her music sux and she’s a sell out. But she IS a pop star and its all about the performance of a particular archetype. In this case rebel rocker (even is she does it badly ). I’d prefer fake ‘rebel rocker’ to real bimbo slut. Although after having watched the ad for V8 supercars, I have to rethink whether given the right economical incentive, she might very well do the bimbo slut act quite well too….
Mistress, why do we have to choose between a fake rebel rocker and a bimbo slut? Do you prefer cocaine or heroin. The point is she sucks and should be ignored not seen as the better of two evils. Bad is bad and there is plenty of good stuff out there.
point taken Simon! shouldnt have to chose between cocaine and heroin
Cool. Did I mention Pink Sucks?
I don’t think you did. Please elaborate.
James,
Happy to oblige. Pinks sucks dried donkey dicks.
Excellent point sir. I concur wholeheartedly.
You are a man of taste and class James.
There’s nothing to admire about this hack. Her apparent “performance skills” are just another ploy. Tomorrow she may just as well be told to sing like Britney Spears, and she’ll do it. Clearly she has no talent, or she wouldn’t be writing, recording and then releasing a song about subjects she admits she knows little about, but only did so because her record label knew the topical opinions of celebrities sell just as much as sex.
lots of people write and sing about love, dispare, longing and disgust without necessarily having experienced the event and/or emotion in question.
Should all writers and performers have to pass some sort of resume audit before going public?
I figure not. Otherwise we may become bereft of books?
Imagine if everyone who write on war had to go to war?
Imagine if everyone who write on economics had to actually understand their topic?
Now maybe that would be a good idea?
P!nk is female??!
Nice job CatKicker!
give whole new meaning to “showing the pink”
Is that supposed to be an insult- are you male or female? What a purely Bogue statement.
Are you insulting her because she sometimes appears androgynous?
Tim Armstrong from Rancid wrote/produced some of her songs for her…Tim Armstrong is dead to me now (as is Lars “White Power” Fredrickson)
Damn. Hoping that was just a rumour. Ignored it… or denied it, if you rather. Dismissed it as ill-informed hearsay and heresy. “…And Out Come the Bogues”.
In his defense though, Armstrong may have still been smarting from young Aussie Brody’s cheatin’ ways – so he decided to go for a nasty, nasty, knock-off. Classic knee-jerk reaction from a hurtin’ Jealous Guy. Maybe he’ll reclaim his street cred and start over… with a Veronica or two. Buy Australian, Tim.
Joe Strummer is dead to me.
There was also one collaborative effort from this bogan queen which was heavily influenced and produced by Beck Hansen (which needless to say sounded very different to anything she has ever recorded before or since). Beck is a musical icon to me and it saddened me somewhet when this happened..
Is Scientology a bogan thing?
rancid are/were pish. they claimed MULTIPLE times they hated corporations, and yet they were regular guests on that talk show on nbc…protoype good charlotte/blink 182 band. mohawk: check. dumb tattoos: check. facial piercings: check. trying to sound like the clash: check. london’s calling, and they’re calling rancid f*ckin’ shite…
My sister bought me a pink ticket and I went along. Kudos for all the live singing.
What surprised me was the crowd. Social outcasts, weirdos, and ugly lesbians. I thought the clientelle would have been much cooler.
Please explain?
pink is pretty much the patron saint of lesbians, they love her. i only know one lesbian who doesn’t like her, and that’s me. and when you say that, they look at you like you’ve just kicked a puppy. ugh.
I went to a Pink concert many years ago, long before the Funhouse Tour and long before she became the bogan icon she is today…and my impression of the crowd was also similar….lots and lots of lesbians and teenagers wearing black! I thought all of the lesibans would have scared the bogan women away! So I am a little surprised she has been embraced the way she has been. Having said all that…the woman can really sing! That has got to give her some points over and above the other naff female pop stars marketeers like to sell to tweens and teenagers with disposable income.
there’s a popular public conception that any marginalised/ostracised community (gay/lesbian/transgender) are some awesomely open-minded and amazingly perceptive people. quite often, they are JUST as bogue/yob/skeg as your aussie-flag-as-cape wearing CUB. in fact, some of the biggest bogans i’ve ever come across as the effeminate, inner-north liberal gay types…
Hindustan, seem that most people on this blogg are just as stereotypical just as marginalised and just as full as shite as the regular boag ??
Myself and Fiona excluded …of course !
for sure! it’s not as if boganity is exclusive to the white, cashed up suburbanite. i just wanted to say that in my experiences with gay people (both men and women), goths, freaks, junkies etc, they were JUST as enthralled by biggest loser/big brother type of ‘entertainment’. the ones that voted on idol and were celebrity chefs all of a sudden. in fact, one of the biggest bogans i’ve ever come across was a firetwirling goth guy with stretched-earlobe plugs and guyliner. seriously, change the get-up, and he could blend in with the bogan set!
Hindustan,
zacerly; I have been mixing with the Gay,trany,goth and most other “name” groups for younks because with my show we draw all those looking for something a bit left field and I agree they are all as boag as all get out in fact more so then some of the “biker” types who at least have the balls to realy be their own men/women.(to another stereotype I hear)
No more stereotypical then those driving Too rack tractors with kids in private,three mortaguges and no money for groceries.
‘nuf to make you feel sorry while puking.
??
My mind wonders to Monday 8th March and what topic TBL will have in store for us. It will have to be something of monumental proportions.
Any predictions?
It will probably be something a little self-indulgent to TBL, such as ‘Outrage at anti-bogan hate sites’, with snippets of some of TBL’s more amusing hate mail. Not to mention the various pro-bogan/anti-TBL diatribes on the TBL Facebook page.
#100 – Giving cool people the shits
Is Rove grinning because he has just spotted Pinks boob or because he has just told himself his favourite joke?
maybe because he has just realised what a joke he is ??
sorry, Rove… Simon started this !!
You have to admit, P!nk has almost single-handedly given transexuals the empowerment to go out there and give it a red hot go. Good on him I say.
Ugh. Pink (P!nk for the bogan society), has brought the Jewish society down.
are nickelback going to get an entry too? either way, i suggest people take themselves over to ninemsn’s site, and on their ‘music fix’ entertainment section (i know, reading celebrity trash news is pretty bogan, but the reader comments are gold) and have a read of the nickelback story there. and, more importantly, read the reader comments below. you will unearth a treasure trove of bogan madness.
Nickelback = Housewife rock.
My favourite comment on the ninemsn article (http://music.ninemsn.com.au/blog.aspx?blogentryid=605130&showcomments=true#ugc_comments):
“A PICKLE IS NOTHING… NICKELBACK IS EVERYTHING!!!
Posted by: Tori, Canberra ACT, on 26/02/2010 09:58:32
Seriously…. how many times has a pickle got somebody through the day without going insaine … it hasnt… but how about you count and see how many times listening to Nickelback ( THE MOST AMAZING BAND WHO EVER LIVED ) can just help somebody when nothing else can. I know that Nickelback has probs stop me from just wanting to jump off a bridge so yeah a pickle is nothing on Chad Kroeger this pickle may have thousands of fans but out of face book Nickelback has millions!!!! it is a world rennound band for crying out loud…….. i love the song Hero so…. i hoope that chad looks at this and sees that there are huuuuuuuuggggggeeeee fans out there that care about him and his music more than anybody cares about a stupid green pickle!!! I LOVE YOU NICKELBACK!!!”
those were great comments, but i think my favourite was the use by one person of the word ‘picklewhore’.
This is my favorite post of all. I believe that “pink” is up there with one of the most trashy, over hyped people this planet has ever produced.
While their “Music Fix” page is Prima Facie evidence of ‘bogan madness’, their “Celebrity Fix” page remains the definitive anthropological study. I submit the following reader comments:
CF’s shocking scoop that “Johnny Depp and Vanessa Paradis stink” had Colleen of Queensland rather riled:
“you should get a life and stop all this lies and not cause all this stuff for those who make it possible for us to go and see the movies be a responsable whatever it is you are people or groups like you give all the same a bad name. get a life please”
And, while lover-not-hater of Wagga agrees with Joan Rivers, who recently declared Victoria “Posh” Beckham, “rude, short and too vulgar to be a celebrity”:
“well i always thought that posh would be like that. i am not shocked she is a B****. it funny that joan rivers thinks so…”
The limit to the amount of altruism a bit egalitarian guilt can induce eventually became manifestly clear in the summation:
“but i am not here to judge… just giggle”.
I rest my case.
When ‘Stupid Girl’ came out, I thought, “Oh yeah, this is cool, a good message that girls don’t have to try to be sexual objects in order to be seen as valuable.”
But then I see something like the Supercars ad, or virtually any of her video clips, and realise that it was possibly just populist bollocks.
I like the girl.
I like the girl.
Yeah-nah…
This blog should be changed to “things tradies like” because in the reality of it all most of these entries are tradie behavioural traits and that of their equally ignorant female partners.
Has anyone noticed the rise of CUB coincides with the celebration of all things tradie? They are a desired species for women these days and are a dream for both the government and marketing agencies. Most ad campaigns these days pamper to the tradie through this blokey stereotype and through really stupid humour that tradies seem to like. I have sat in production meetings and most of the clever thought out ideas are always dismissed as too hard for the target demographic – which is the tradesman with a lot of money.
A tradie in australia has more respect than an intellect or scientist or a forward thinker these days and hence why most of these ignorant walk around with an obnoxious attitude and expecting or demanding respect or else they’ll glass you.
LOL. *ding ding ding*, we have a winner! <3
Fi,
You are alive and well?
I had been so concerned for you in your absence.
the soprano trills of your shrills so set the standard against which the bassoon note of the buffoons ,should be judged as i’m sure you understand.
I hope you were in awe of me and mine??
don’t forget the offer for the 3rd and or 13th ??
love you and love your work
James Hunter
a.k.a. baby hanibal.
LOL. Hmmm. The use of “hence why” has lessened the impact of your missive.
Well with all due respect cunnelife,
I can understand what i think you are trying to say BUT
I would rather have a Tradie that knowswhats what wiring my house then you OR someone with the skills set of a school teacher that cannot engender respect for others in your brats?
I would rather have a civil engineer building my roads then someone with the extensive skills set of an economist trying to look after the economy???
I couls go on but I’m sure with your short attention span you would loose interest and as for focus?? it’s more then just a little Ford.
LOL. And I would rather read something from a man capable of rational thought.
Who is that vacuous bint that prefaces all her posts with “LOL” ?
Now hear , here, I must object !
Fi and I go back aways you see , and I will have you know that Fi is “Trim Taut and Terrific”
and her tendency to use the LOL signature is to be understood if you realise that for Fi it means “Lots Of Love”.
So any of you cads or bounders object it will be dry martinis at dawn
Eh !!
I will add that Pink proved how stupid she was when she did her “statement” song to protest against pop bimbo’s and performed it with more leg spreading than happens in a brothel on any given night.I couldnt believe how many people praised her for “sticking it up the pop slappers” when she was acting more crass than any of them to make her “point”
About the brothel bit oh bint,
I yield to a man of greater experience.??
LOL. So you went to the concert then…???
Fiona,
going to a brothel is on thing , to a pink concert? Now that is definately a different thing!
I don’t mind pink, I like her music, and I like her – not for the reasons bogans do… I think she is a good performer and the shows she puts on are worth the money and thats about it… but her arrogance is annoying, I’ll give you that.
You sir/madam are a bogan.
This article was brilliant! The video is the funniest part!
I had no idea this talentless attention whore was so popular in Oz, now that I think of it she seemed to be on every fourth episode of Rove.My brother in law and I were discussing the various things we loathed about her after one of those supercars ads came on tv and I mentioned that she appears to be getting a bit chunky these days.My sister interjected and pointed out that the poor girl has no discernable waist, I checked and she is right.
I did have a chuckle about the hypocrisy of stupid girls being performed by the same girl who was on the cover of FHM [the spread was heavily airbrushed to add in some semblance of a waist].
P!nk for president
1385 members.
hahaha
I don’t entirely agree with this article, obviously she is loved and idolised by bogans throughout Australia in regards to her devoted interests in cars (Veey ‘ates moite) and motorbikes. But when it comes to misspelling her stage name and her album I think she was just being artistic by releasing out a statement and giving it more emphasis. A lot of music artists faff around with the English language with their band names and titles of their albums even smart well read artists such as Frank Zappa (Shut and up and play yer guitar comes to mind) who is one of the brainiest rock stars of all time.
Not a fan of Pink’s music but I do give Pink credit for a few things:
1. She puts most of the barbie doll pop singers throughout the music industry today when it comes to talent and brains.
2. She isn’t a fad follower like most of the other today’s female popstars.
3. She slams bimbo role models like Paris Hilton, Heidi Montag, Jessica Simpson, etc who are having bad influence on female adolescent teens by influencing them to have silicone tits, fake tans, other sorts of plastic surgery and being slutty in her song “Stupid Girl”.
4. Her heart is in the right place when it comes to animals she refused to play at Prince Harry’s birthday because of his devotion to fox hunting.
5. She doesn’t influence female teenage adolescents to do twisted antics like that severely mentally twisted popstar Ladette Gaga is doing right now by wearing clothes and make up hookers wear and getting eye contact lenses to get them to look like a japanese cartoon character.
Also George W Bush who has a brain of a monkey and the worst President the USA has ever had actually deserves to ridiculed by Pink.
In my final conclusion I am actually surprised that she is loved by bogans because I thought they would be more apperist and not tolerate her unconventional look but that I mean not looking like a barbie doll pop singer like Sophie Monk and mostly would slam her for being “too dikey”.
let me rephrase 1. she puts most of the popstars today to shame when it comes to her talent and brains
I think she is great and shouldn’t be on this list. She has ethics and spunk and is down to earth. Good on her for speaking out against Bush and mulesing. She is a strong woman who has talent and doesn’t use sex to sell her songs. With so many talentless bimbos making music I don’t know how people can knock her.
[…] television screens. The authors have seen the light, and now realise that it’s actually all P!nk’s […]
TBL Gold:
http://www.theage.com.au/lifestyle/people/pinks-nobrainer-name-for-son-20101130-18ecd.html
she’s ok.Most of us don’t know this but Pink outsold Susan Boyle on the Australian Market in 2010 AND who other than Mum’s Dad’s and Grandparent’s buys the latter
Amen.
This muppett P!nk is totally loved in Bogan city. Give me Pink Floyd on Vinyl!
Was it P!nk (sic) who empowered the Boguettes to poke out their tongues in photos?