#211 – Foxtel

31 01 2011

For some time now, the bogan has been convinced that it has deserved more. More more-ishness, to the point of immense maxocity. As the size of its television screen expanded during the 1990s, it realised that it not only wanted more screen, but more things on its screen. On Australia Day 1995, Australia’s first pay television service was launched. While Galaxy initially only had two channels, it contained the letter X, and bogans began to sign up. Soon Galaxy was joined by Optus Vision, which had a bigger budget, but fewer Xs. But in October 1995, the key player entered the fray. Foxtel had an even bigger budget, 20 channels, AND the letter X. From this point onwards, the story of pay television in Australia effectively became the story of the bogan’s love for Foxtel.

Foxtel was bound to succeed. It was initially a 50:50 joint venture between Telstra and bogan svengali News Corporation, but 25% was subsequently transferred to PBL, then owner of such bogan treasures as Crown Casino, Burswood Casino and Richard Wilkins. Like numerous other truly clever bogan cash harvesting undertakings, Foxtel has never really given the bogan something it didn’t already have. Instead, Foxtel has mainly just offered more of the same, reinforcing to the bogan that more is better, and therefore worth paying more for.  Or, in this case, worth paying something for, instead of nothing. Indeed, pay television can be seen as the bottled water of home entertainment.

This is not to say that the bogan doesn’t derive an enormous amount of value from having Foxtel. The mere act signing up for channels such as National Geographic and Discovery Channel serves as a big boost to the bogan’s estimation of itself as a sophisticate, even if its occasional encounters with those two channels are largely confined to watching large animals killing things, and seeing tribal boobs, respectively. A recently watched documentary allows the bogan to proudly recite a couple of obscure factual details from the program, before they permanently exit its memory 48 hours later.

The other channels in the package allow the bogan to view movies it would never have paid money for at a video store, or spend hours per week watching obscure sports that it has little actual interest in. Foxtel has recently lifted its average revenue per user to $92 per month, a shining tribute to the company’s ability to sell the bogan ever more add-on packages that it didn’t know it wanted.

The recent advent of digital television in Australia has allowed the free to air networks to finally strike back, offering the bogan more. More things that were too dismal to screen when each network only had one channel. Now the bogan is torn between watching the thrills of a Bhutan v Senegal test match on Fox Sports 3, or another exciting rerun of Murder She Wrote, on Gem. While this choice can be confusing, one thing that does not confuse the bogan is its ongoing need to be a Foxtel subscriber. Because television would be shit otherwise.


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432 responses

31 01 2011
Tone

Channel BT is officially THE schiz. What I want, when I want for $0 per month. WIN!

31 01 2011
martin

So true. I used to watch the History channel a lot. My knowledge of history isn’t much better than a high school kid’s after they’ve done year 10 history. I looked up Oliver Cromwell last night on wikipedia but there were too many words to read.

I watched Seinfeld a lot partially because I wanted to get some value but that’s just too old now.

Channel BT ftw.

31 01 2011
Gorey

I used to watch the History Channel too. Then it became the History of World War Two Channel. I haven’t had Pay TV for a long time now.

31 01 2011
Nelson Esq

Otherwise known as The Hitler Channel. I know a couple of bogans who were hooked on the WW2 doco’s continuously shown on the Hitler Channel. They like it because of all the violence and killing and exposions and shit.

31 01 2011
James Hunter

Seinfeld, value , in the same sentence ? Hmmmmmm

31 01 2011
Legless on Thalidomide

Surely a demonstration on juxtaposition James? Thanks for the English lesson Martin.

31 01 2011
martin

Wot? Did I do some rong inglish? Terribly sorry.

31 01 2011
Brimstone

wait… you think Seinfield has no value?
it’s awesome

31 01 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms

Don’t listen to JH, he’s from Newcastle region.

31 01 2011
martin

Must be civilisation envy.

31 01 2011
James Hunter

Martin
Civilisation is relative. My relatives are civilised.!

31 01 2011
Brimstone

How many channels does Foxtel actually have? ’cause it seems like it’s American cable from, what, the 80s?
but of course anything other than ABC and SBS is too much for your sensative little minds. the Aussie attitude is LESS. LESS art, LESS entertainment, LESS everything
enjoy your small lives
i just want a feed of the American Sci-Fi Channel, Adult Swim, Cartoon Network…

Adult Swim makes some good stuff. I’m a big fan of Aqua Teen Hunger Force, and it’s all thanks to Channel BT. TBL

31 01 2011
Shirley

Less art? Less entertainment? Sorry Brimstone, you’re wrong again. Just less bullshit.

31 01 2011
Brimstone

how many of you attacking cable own DVD sets of The Wire? The Sopranos? True Blood? Dexter? Mad Men? Stargate? Venture Brothers? South Park?

you know that’s all developed for cable, right?
the quality TV you get here comes from cable networks. Australia needs to get them and make their own Sopranos. and no, Underbelly dosen’t count

31 01 2011
Dgusten

Brimstone – the title of today’s blog is “Foxtel”.
Not “US cable TV”.
You can watch The Wire, etc on free-to-air Australian TV.
There is no need to pay for Foxtel. It is bogan to pay for Foxtel.
The end.

31 01 2011
AlyssaKT

Exactly. While Australian free-to-air is still showing reasonable shows now and then, I can see no need to pay to watch them. Irritatingly though, the networks have a habit of playing half seasons and/or moving them to midnight time slots and not advising the TV guides of changes – so you miss them. Sopranos’ last season would be a good example of exactly that.

I’ve always thought I watch too much TV as it is – “investing” in TV would only make me want to get “my money’s worth”.

31 01 2011
Brimstone

“Irritatingly though, the networks have a habit of playing half seasons and/or moving them to midnight time slots and not advising the TV guides of changes – so you miss them.”

this makes me physically angry

31 01 2011
urbanreverie

Oh Shirley, I can almost feel my long-repressed inner bogan being unleashed. I feel this piercing urge to shout “Well if you DON’T like it here ….” But I won’t.

Sure, knock this country, knock its people. God knows many of us do that right here all the time.

But leave the ABC and SBS alone! It’s one of the few refuges we libtard anti-bogans have, and it beats the living daylights out of PBS, the “Perpetually Boring System”, which is America’s pathetic excuse for a national broadcaster. Honestly, Jim Lehrer is a more effective sedative than valium.

8 02 2011
Lola

American PBS is a distressing bell-weather. If that’s what counts for public ie. non-commercial broadcasting over there, it says something frightening about that last layer of hope I held out for the world: the ‘intelligent American’.

31 01 2011
martin

Sci Fi channel? Nogan.

31 01 2011
EsDee

I think I want a sensative mind – it sounds good.

31 01 2011
Dgusten

Stuck in the past?
Is that a bit like how US network television is stuck in the days when you can’t swear? (one of my favourite activities while living there was to look out for the re-dubbing of swearing in movies – my favourite was when Bruce Willis’s Die Hard’s catchphrase became “Yippee kai yay, Mister Falcon!”)
And where there’s national outrage when a network accidentally flashes a jewel covered nipple at the Superbowl?
Yep, we’re the one with the “sensitive little minds”…

31 01 2011
Brimstone

that’s network. everyone has basic cable and most poeple have premium cable

31 01 2011
AlyssaKT

yes, and we don’t have to…

31 01 2011
p'bee

oh i love it when they do that! the voices are never even close to matching, either.

31 01 2011
AlyssaKT

when I was in France I saw a dubbed John Wayne film – we found it hilarious when he pushed open the saloon doors and announced “Bonsoir” to everyone in the bar. Hahaha

31 01 2011
Pandabater

In ‘Heartbreak Ridge’ Clint says
“Maggot Farmer” instead of you know.
I still use it instead of the other.

31 01 2011
p'bee

the best i saw was when i was in germany and they had heartbreak high (apparently it was a huge hit there) and because the line was shorter in german than english, one character turned around to answer a question before it was asked.

3 02 2011
laurenbee

In India they cut anything they deem too “racy” from International movies, even on HBO which is available in most hotels (unlike clean sheets & towels)

Sex & they City went for 45 minutes

3 02 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms, Constant source of Randomness

So it was still 45 mins too long?

3 02 2011
James Hunter

Simon,
Sex and the City with out the sex? what would you call it ?
PS love the addendum to moniker. a little randomness is only bettered by a lot of randomness.?

31 01 2011
EsDee

I just want US television networks to stop the plundering of British TV – most of all leave Being Human alone!

31 01 2011
Pendant

It seems there’s even a US Shameless now. Even morbid curiosity hasn’t brought me to have a look.

31 01 2011
p'bee

and a us skins.

31 01 2011
p'bee

i spent a year in north america with the hundreds of tv channels. there still wasn’t much to watch – the only thing i really liked was bbc world news. the discovery channel did have one great documentary on tugboats, though. more tv channels doesn’t really mean more quality tv.

31 01 2011
Brimstone

ATHF came out about 10 years ago

Yes. TBL

31 01 2011
Brimstone

and this ‘screw TV. go to the beach’ attitude is bogan

31 01 2011
p'bee

i’d have thought sitting inside to watch hours of tv and living through a box sitting in the corner was more bogan.

31 01 2011
Brimstone

TV is just another modern art form. the ‘go outside’ bullshit seems worse

31 01 2011
p'bee

describing not having cable as like losing a limb suggests too much of an attachment to the idiot box.
there’s some great stuff on tv, but there’s great stuff outside, in books, in music, in doing so many things. tv is just one little aspect of life.

31 01 2011
Brimstone

it’s the whole ‘less, less, less’ attitude i don’t get

31 01 2011
Shirley

I don’t understand what you mean when you talk of this ‘less, less, less’ attitude.

31 01 2011
Brimstone

small population
less development
less loud music
less TV

31 01 2011
Shirley

Well Brimstone, on the other side of every ‘less’ there is an opposing ‘more’. Less development = more trees, for example.

Less loud music?

8 02 2011
Lola

Noice one Shirl!

31 01 2011
Mick

No, taking your tv to the beach is bogan. As is taking a tv when you go camping.

There’s nothing like sitting in a beautiful spot, sipping on a coldie and watching the sunset. To have the silence ruined by the theme music for whatever quiz show Eddie is fronting at the moment is wrong. So very, very wrong.

31 01 2011
Shirley

What do they call people with the attitude ‘I like it and if you don’t you are small minded’ in The States, Brimstone?

31 01 2011
Brimstone

it’s called ‘not being a pretentious douche’

31 01 2011
AlyssaKT

run along then. I’m sure some Mash reruns can be found somewhere for you to watch.

31 01 2011
Brimstone

yes, because M.A.S.H has no artistic value

wait, what?
of all the shows you pick to make fun of me you pick MASH?

31 01 2011
James Hunter

Brim,
One would think that if the Aussies are into less,less art, less entertainment then the American shows that we get should be right up their ally ?

SBS and ABC (Australian Broadcasting Commission not that other mob) are world class services and thus do pitch a bit high. Certainly lots of Overseas Visitors find their offerings a bit above them. This figures though they come from the same places the bogans ancestors do. !!

31 01 2011
Brimstone

and digital TV is okay, but it’s only 15 channels
love Eleven and Go and 7Mate but it still feels like being stuck in the past

31 01 2011
Davo

I don’t get why the people on the ads for Eleven are always laughing. Love boat, Sabrina, Macgyver. These shows arn’t funny.

31 01 2011
AlyssaKT

or Neighbours!

31 01 2011
Son of Duane

Neighbours is unintentional comedy. Laugh at its hammy acting, stupid storylines etc.

31 01 2011
Robbie

“Indeed, pay television can be seen as the bottled water of home entertainment.”

Perfect.

Just, perfect.

31 01 2011
Dgusten

Thank you TBL – I’ve been waiting for this since becoming a fan of the site a year or so ago.
Foxtel is one of the biggest bogan money black holes going around – it was before, and now that there is free-to-air multi-channelling (and TV shows and movies are easily downloadable), it is more so than ever.
You want a movie? Go to the cinema, the video store, or download one. You want sport? Most of it’s on free to air, but if like me you’re team’s game is occasionally on Foxtel, go to the pub to watch it, and use the $92 a month you’ve saved to buy a beer or two.
I’ve heard of bogans who, when moving house, proudly tell you that they’ve organised the Foxtel connection for move in day, even though they haven’t sorted the gas, water or electricity connection yet (notwithstanding the fact that the Foxtel’s not much use without the electricity…).
My parents have Foxtel: 100+ channels, and yet they still seem to spend most of their time watching the free to air channels…
Meanwhile, “Foxtel has never really given the bogan something it didn’t already have” and “the bottled water of home entertainment” are pure gold.
Again, thank you.

31 01 2011
Brimstone

being without cable feels like losing a limb

31 01 2011
Tone

Only a bogan would say that, Brimstone. 😛

31 01 2011
Legless on Thalidomide

I resent that statement.

31 01 2011
James Hunter

Yep they had to cut of your leg to save your life. !

31 01 2011
Brimstone

i’m cut off from Sci-Fi, Adult Swim, and heaps of geek and pop culture

2 02 2011
$hruglife

Your life kicks arse! Wait, what?

23 01 2013
Todd

You do realise that watching sport while sitting in a pub and buying overpriced tap beer is a bogan pass time don’t you? For a Bogan sport and alcohol go hand in hand, a bogan cannot enjoy sport unless they have a glass of alcohol in their hand.

31 01 2011
Shirley

Paying for telly is crazy. Having to endure the Foxtel EOFYS ads was almost enough to convince me all telly is crazy.

31 01 2011
Dgusten

How bout “Foxmas time, Foxmas time, blah blah fucking blah”?
Foxtel has only slightly less ads than commercial tv, although presumably you don’t get these shittiest of shitty ads cos you’re already a subscriber?

31 01 2011
martin

Seeing one of those conceited, pretentious, sanctimonious, smug, rusted on liberal voting yuppy couples with quite strong germanic facial features, a daughter going through a whiny libtard/emo phase and all singing “EOFYS” nearly gave me a nervous breakdown too.

31 01 2011
Tone

31 01 2011
Kimba

Foxtel is a bit of a necessary evil in my household. We are all pretty passionate about Football (A League, EPL, Socceroos etc), none of which are televised on free to air. The day that this changes, goodbye Foxtel.

31 01 2011
Legless on Thalidomide

As an avid fan of Football, domestic Rugby Union & Rugby League I have the sports package. That is about all I watch however as I have other activities that are more fulfilling to occupy myself than to watch repeats of The Nanny, That 70’s Show and The Simpsons ad nauseam.

I pray for free-to-air television to pick up the A-League rights… They couldn’t command all that much with the quality of some of the games at the moment.

31 01 2011
Kimba

I also pray that the A League goes to FTA, if only for the fact that it might get a few more people interested in the comp and a few more people along to home games. As for the quality of the games, I think the quality has really been improving and while it will never match EPL standards, it’s definately worth watching.

1 02 2011
Bag O'Turnips

I just happened to be boning up one my knowledge of cricket (cue Richie Benaud jokes) and casting a gaze over the minor cricketing nations and note that Bhutan is merely an affiliate member of the ICC, therefore not qualified to play Test matches, though they may be invited to play one-day internationals. As for Senegal, they’re not even an ICC member at all!

Unless they’re both nations in some weirdburger rebel Test league, then it’d help for you otherwise fine folk at TBL to do some rudimentary research before you come up with a scenario that has a cricket match of such an esoteric nature, that it has to be relegated Fox Sports 3 at 3 AM, due to lack of ratings interest…try perhaps a Bhutan vs. Zambia ODI match? I can hardly wait, I may just subscribe to Foxtel for that alone 🙂

2 02 2011
Legless on Thalidomide

Sounds like an enthralling match.

31 01 2011
v'visexxx!on

We decided a few years back that with Mr Viv’s staff discount at JB Hi Fi – we would be better off buying every tv series and movie we wanted and it would still be cheaper than foxtel. And we could decide when we wanted to watch them. I didn’t figure out that at some point I would need to spend $1400 to get a custom built cabinet made to house 700 dvds…. At least now we can download things and that takes up less space. And Foxtel never saw a dime.

31 01 2011
clipper

“the bottled water of home entertainment” – so true! While a lot of the digital channels have “More things that were too dismal to screen”, it has allowed for regular programming of such gems as The Wire, Dexter etc instead of just sticking them on any old time – you’ve just got to find them amongst the dross and endless repeats (how many more times can they repeat 2 1/2 men, big bang theory or the simpsons?)

31 01 2011
Brimstone

you forget that The Wire, Dexter etc were filmed for cable

31 01 2011
p'bee

but some of that also comes down to the american networks’ fear of anything that might have a naughty word in it. if the networks didn’t constrain themselves so much with their ‘family values’ malarkey they could make similarly challenging and complex shows.

31 01 2011
Brimstone

so why haven’t the Aussie networks? its because network TV (a concept that’s mostly dead in America) has to entertain the widest possible audience. and Australia has very few people, so you end up with middle of the road crap
can you point me to one good Aussie drama that stands up with the HBo stuff? hell even something on the level of Smallville

31 01 2011
EsDee

I find 90% of the American stuff including Dexter incredibly boring and manufactured – it has surface polish but little else. The Wire and Mad Men are exceptions.

Brit TV is way better, as for Oz TV hell I would even watch Rafters than anything American.

31 01 2011
Kimba

“Rake” on ABC. Check it out.

31 01 2011
p'bee

also much of what sbs produces is absolutely brilliant.

31 01 2011
Brimstone

saw a bit, but not my style
prefer genre entertainment

31 01 2011
Dgusten

Mostly the population thing – it’s also why our movies tend to be ordinary as well.
However, The Secret Life of Us wasn’t bad, at least for the first season.
Love My Way is good – ironically, it was produced by Foxtel (although presumably mostly using government money meaning it could just as easily have been made by the ABC, and if so it would likely have been enjoyed by a much larger audience.
We Can Be Heroes and Summer Heights High are brilliant comedies.

31 01 2011
EsDee

The TV production of Cloudstreet also seems to be on cable. Sad.

31 01 2011
James Hunter

East coast west ? also the Canadian TV shows are way better then the yanky dribble.

31 01 2011
Nelson Esq

‘Rake’ which was on the ABC last year, starring Richard Roxburgh, is the best Australian show on TV. Better than Sopprano’s or any other HBO thing that has come out!

31 01 2011
Brimstone

you mean Boston Legal minus Shatner and Spader?

2 02 2011
Nelson Esq

Yes, Boston Legal minus Shatner and Spader, and also minus ‘quirky’ over the top, syrupy characters with aspergers and/or multiple personality disorders and are clones of one another and other characters which were just ripped off David e Kelley’s other legal show, Ally McBeal.

Then add brilliant and witty original script writing to create intelligent dialogue and complex and flawed characters with real human vices and more than one dimention to their personality (i.e not manufacturered for the lowest common denominator idiot audience) and then add some great acting and you’ve got ‘Rake’. Thank God for the ABC.

Don’t worry about watching it Brim, I don’t think you’d like/get it.

2 02 2011
AlyssaKT

*adds Rake to must-see list*

31 01 2011
Insider

As someone who worked for that corporation of spivvery, I can tell you Foxtel double dips in that you pay to wacth it AND the ads it runs on practically every channel. Foxtel only profited about $6/month from people who had the minimum package so someone sarcastically suggested we pass a collection plate around the office to get Foxtel back on its feet.
My favourites would be hearing stories from sales/customer service of people who have had Foxtel “since youse were called Galaxy” and want free stuff (free extra channels for a year, free extra boxes in their house, etc etc etc).
PS only a fool would be taken in by EOFYS/Foxmas. The bogan is therefore as good as signed up by default.

31 01 2011
bellastarkey

I’d probably neck myself if i couldn’t watch eastenders (but that makes me a chave not a bogan)

31 01 2011
Sheriff Struggle

I got rid of Foxtel when I moved house a year ago. Mrs Sheriff was devastated that she couldn’t watch Eastenders. I was as happy as a Chav in Burberry. I never have to see Peggy Mitchell or Cat Slater ever again.

31 01 2011
CoffeeSnob

I worked for Optus Vision many moons ago.

I can testify that pay-tv is the burning candle that the bogan hordes gather round nightly (and most of the day too).

Should that candle flicker or go out then the wrath of said hordes descend upon hapless call centre employees and shall not cease until the beautiful mind-numbing light of a repeat of the WWE match has been restored.

Never-mind religion, tv is the opiate of the masses.

Yes there is such a thing as “good” tv, but the DVD is a far better way to see it.

31 01 2011
TheBattlersPrince

I thought opium was the opiate of the masses…

3 02 2011
Nelson Esq

I have a mate who used to run his own TV antenna installation business. He used to get a fair bit of work in poorer areas and doing commission housing jobs, as he was cheaper than the franchises of Jim’s and Mr Antenna etc.

One day I was with him in the car and we drove past the Fitzroy Housing Commission flats and he commented that he’d done quite a few TV points in the flats. He pointed out the number of Pay TV satellite dishes stuck to the side of the building; I couldn’t count them all, there were so many! He commented that nearly every flat had Foxtel and that he was a hero in that place, because he brought the residents TV reception; they lived for watching TV, did nothing else and had nothing else in their lives. He said that he had refused to take payment for some of the jobs in there as the people were so poor they couldn’t even afford food; they’d rather sacrifice food than their TV access. He’d feel so sorry for them that instead of taking a cash payment as he normally would, he’d tell them that he’d send them the bill, but never would. Quite sad really.

31 01 2011
Pendant

I know your average bogan isn’t the most tech savvy on the block, but I’m still amazed that someone could cough up $92 for TV when an unmetered 24Mbps line goes for $60/month.

Relatedly, I put all the media I’d acquired in over the years on a 1.5TB external drive and installed a portable copy of XBMC, results were quite awesome. Anyone else have a similar setup (or even a proper HTPC)?

22 05 2015
Powerlounge

My ex housemate and I had a full Plex server setup 😀

We had a media PC, 8 TB NAS and an unmetered ADSL connection. It was brilliant, just set up an RSS feed in uTorrent, specify what to download and where to put it and Plex would detect it and download the file info. Once it was running it was bliss, all your favourite shows waiting ready to go as soon as you get home from work.

I need to get around to setting it all up again…

31 01 2011
chubbybloodfart

we had foxtel. after the first year One swiftly realises One has already seen every thing on foxtel. One may let the subscription run for another year just to watch everything once more and then One puts One’s wallet away. The In-Laws still have foxtel so I can confirm that they are still showing the same shows.
I was dismally disappointed with my pay TV experience. It was just all so beige and MOR. Nothing approaches the quality of doco’s on SBS/ABC and I just couldn’t be bothered watching anything else. (except archer and frisky dingo. yay channel BT).
Otherwise I have no idea what Brimstone is on about. How old are you? Not old enough to be able to afford to fly yourself “home” apparently.
You need to understand three things:
1. australians hate being told anywhere else in the world is in any way better at anything than them. it is the only cultural faux pas One can commit in this country, roughly equivalent to punching a cow in Varanassi by way of allegory.
2 Everyone else in the world hates being told America is good at anything. this is because every one else in the world knows americans are, by and large, ill informed, insular, jingoistic morons and bullies. the only people who don’t unerstand this are americans. (that’s the insular part).
3. “You are a tool and a douchebag.” This is a quote from season one of Top Chef which originally aired on foxtel in australia about five years ago and in the United States on classical hand tooled televisions in the late eighteenth century.no doubt.
See if you can spot the “irony” hipster.

31 01 2011
Muz

FOF!

You are a rude cock mate, no 2 ways about it. Bloke has a different opinion to you and you tee off on him. Nice one.

Flame away with your little group think buddies. Shirley et al…

FOF!

31 01 2011
Shirley

Ahhh Muz. Way to hold a grudge there tiger.

31 01 2011
James Hunter

Muz,
Having read Chubbys disertation carefully and yours the same I can report on my findings thus:

Without being “blue pencil ” strict about syntax,grammer and usage,I find Chubbys article to be thought provoking, truthful, accurate and worty of accolade.

Without being patronising , careful study of your comments revels nothing worty of comment regarding todays topic. It does rasie serious questions about your own maturity and predeliction to jealousy.

So the score board reads
Chubby: 8,9,7,9,9. Degree of dificulty 7.5
Muz : 2,1,3,2,1, Degree of dificulty 0

31 01 2011
Muz

FOF!

Many apologies James for sticking up for another poster. Must have lost control of the jealousy/maturity part of my brain there for a minute.

Apparently this….

“How old are you? Not old enough to be able to afford to fly yourself “home” apparently.”

…..is mature comment and my questioning of the need to be so rude isn’t?!

The bloke (Brimstone) comes on here and has the temerity to slag off Aussie TV, much the same as many of the other posters BUT shock/horror, he’s a dirty foreigner!!! (Do you see the irony?)

I mean, how dare he?! (Especially seeing 90% of people here would probably agree with him here that Aussie TV is rubbish notwithstanding the occasional gem.)

What does he get for his trouble? A gobful from one of the self-appointed high priests of the TBL comments board. It’s rude, patronising, condescending and high-handed. Disagree on the facts all you want but the rant above is over-the-top.

I read the comments from time to time and the thing that sticks out like the proverbial dog’s balls is that if there’s a diversion from the core posters and their group think it’s sure as eggs that person will be driven from the site.

And it’s “grammar” James.

FOF!

31 01 2011
James Hunter

Muz before we get to my age how old are you ? 18 I would guess.

31 01 2011
Brimstone

Thanks Muz!
It gives me a really bad impression of this country and this site
but if another Aussie said what i said they’d agree

31 01 2011
Muz

Brim,

No worries. (There’s a group think happening here and woe is anyone that deviates from the norm unless you’re one of the annointed few.)

James,

Old enough to know not to flirt with men masquerading as women.

Chub,

It’s ancient history and a spin on the LOL Fiona of Toorak used to write preceding every post of his/hers. FOF means Fuck Off Fiona. (A tad droll I’ll admit and as he/she doesn’t frequent these pages any more it might be time to drop it.)

31 01 2011
chubbybloodfart

yes
I remember.
you didn’t like fiona
and you used to tell her to f*ck off
now that’s irony. dickhead.

31 01 2011
chubbybloodfart

*slap*
that was fun.
wish I could put it on a timeline.

seriously kids,
it’s the internet. it’s all vitriol and lies.

31 01 2011
chubbybloodfart

again, Muz, I am indebted.
in addition to my explanation and apology below I will quickly point out I sought not to malign Brim for attacking australia but promoting america.
your comment does serve to point out one of the limitations of internet communication. without context and inflection I am nothing. apparently. I sought never to be an High Priest. I only ever wished to offer POV from a Naive, Romantic, Punk Humanist Hedonist Zen Fatalist perspective. A perspective sadly under represented in our Cultural Milieu in my humble opinion. If I have interfered with your quiet enjoyment of the blog comments I sincerely apologise. I certainly never sought to exclude anybody deliberately and only saw your perceived “group think” as a natural extension of common group dynamics. Nonetheless, your point is taken. Out of respect for the blog authors, so as to no further sully their great work or impinge on the comfort and sensibilities of people like yourself I shall refrain from commenting.

31 01 2011
v'visexxx!on

I find it fascinating how in the eyes of some readers, anyone with the confidence to regularly comment here is designated a self appointed high priest of the site and therefore any opinion they might hold is considered either invalid because the other people they banter with hold similar opinions. Usually the person who points this out rarely, if ever comments themselves and contributes next to nothing, yet feels a duty to point out how poorly entertained they are by the people they feel duty bound to critique. Fascinating stuff. For the record Chubby, I enjoy your opinions, whether I agree or disagree – at least you share them and think about them.

31 01 2011
EsDee

Furthermore, Brim has been commenting here for yonkers and can more than hold his own!

31 01 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms

SD, noice I just got it. Monday huh.

31 01 2011
EsDee

🙂

Brim likes to stir things up.

31 01 2011
Brimstone

Nope. i like to express my opinions. I thought i’d be part of the anti-bogan demographic but I find it facinating how i differ from the Australian norm. American pop culture and even high culture blogs reguraly praise the great shows coming out of cable TV. Hell even the SMH constantly references Mad Men and even Deadwood

31 01 2011
EsDee

But aren’t Mad Men and the like a very small part of cable TV? And had lots of critical acclaim but less viewership? If Mad Men is good, it doesn’t mean all of cable is good.

What I don’t get is why you perceive comments as an attack on America. Or use it to fit into your notions of Australia(unambitious and the like). Maybe Australian non-bogans like quality shows – local and from everywhere, not just the US?

3 02 2011
hel

at the risk of being bogan, I have returned from a brief hiatus to this…. fiasco? May I remind you “Fighting on the internet is like running in the special olypmics. Even if you win, you’re still retarded”. Where did all the love go people??

3 02 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms, Constant source of Randomness

See what happens when you leave Hel. This post went a bit batsh*t there for some reason.

31 01 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms

Sh*t I will probably get in trouble for agreeing with ya Viv but good call. And Brim seems very able to accept a bit of robust discussion re his views on America. Guess he is pretty used to defending his position.

Anyway comment away all, for god or bad.

9 02 2011
Lola

Muz you’ve left out the group of people who come here and think BOTH American and Australian modern TV culture are f*cked. It’s not an either/or situation. Brimstone makes good points about crappy Australian TV/Cable, but implying there’s something superior about America in this regard is the point that’s getting people worked up. For most Australians ‘caring’ about TV is weird: we just don’t get that sentiment (which seems really prevalent in the US.)

31 01 2011
chubbybloodfart

sorry Muz. You’re correct. The tool/douchebag comment may have come off as invective and I did intend the comment to be a little more humourous and jibing. I sought merely to point out that Brim does tend to confine his comments to a sort of misty eyed reminiscence for his homeland and to express that I found this sweet in a sort of “naivety of youth” way. I did intend the piece to be a little self deprecating (and hopefully humourous) with the comment about not insulting aussies and then following on to insult americans. My spin on wry irony. Obvious Irony Fail eh? The Ad Hominem attack is the last refuge of the feeble minded. So whilst it was perhaps fair game to imply america sucks as a concept, it was not fair to malign Brim as an individual. Point taken.

just finally, what is FOF?
I thought it may be “eff off fool” but it just doesn’t fit.
I do love to stay “hip” with the acronyms.

lots of love
thanks again
Drew.

31 01 2011
Brimstone

the only thing i miss about America is the TV

31 01 2011
Dgusten

But what do you miss about it?
Most of the dramas and sitcoms are available to buy on DVD or downloadable (Channel BT).
Most of the good quality shows you refer to are on free-to-air in Australia. Increasingly, they’re fast-tracked.
But meanwhile there are the piles and piles of turds that are produced that we are fortunately never forced to even see ads for – for every Two and a Half Men is another 5 sitcoms which are even worse.
I note you think network tv is “dead” in America, yet the most watched show in America last week (non-football) out-rated the top cable show by 3.
And the most popular show on cable TV in America last week? Was Jersey Shore. It was number 2 as well (pun intended).

31 01 2011
Dgusten

Ha, outrated by 3 times. Not 3 people.

31 01 2011
Pandabater

Due to the size difference of our markets you cannot compare US & Australian TV. If a show in the US gets a 2% share it’s a success. If a show in Australia gets a 20% share it gets axed. In the US even if you shovel crap into the trough someone will lap it up. Here the networks will drop anything that doesn’t blitz the ratings in its first few weeks.

31 01 2011
Brimstone

i don’t just miss the high quality stuff. i also miss the good but not great stuff that won’t make it over here. the middling Adult Swim shoes. superhero cartoons. shows like Terriers and Justified that get online buzz but don’t rise to Mad Men levels of fame. bad Sci-Fi telemovies. plus, i’m a geek, and before 7mate and Eleven it seemed like there wasn’t much genre stuff on TV here

31 01 2011
p'bee

if you want bad sci-fi movies you need tvs community television channel. they have dodgy sci-fis on friday nights, and they’re absolutely hilarious.

1 02 2011
Brimstone

i do watch them

1 02 2011
James Hunter

Brim,
Make sure you catch Dick Dales “Trasharama” when in Sydney next.
Dick shows Trash movies from alover including local ones. Fantastic stuff.

1 02 2011
johnnydrama

I thought it was Frown On Face, the opposite of LOL?

31 01 2011
Son of Duane

Good to see another Archer fan here!

31 01 2011
chubbybloodfart

Oh My God!
Does Archer not just completely effing ROCK!!!! or what?
did you dig frisky dingo? and sealab?
matt and adam are the new matt and tre.
the best thing on telly.

31 01 2011
Son of Duane

Haven’t seen Frisky Dingo yet, but Sealab 2021 was also great.

31 01 2011
Brimstone

“Everyone else in the world hates being told America is good at anything. this is because every one else in the world knows americans are, by and large, ill informed, insular, jingoistic morons and bullies. the only people who don’t unerstand this are americans. (that’s the insular part).”

but we are best at TV. seriously
i bet every poster on this thread has a DVD set of at least one American TV show

31 01 2011
p'bee

we do better kids tv than the usa, though, with the exception of a few cartoons.

31 01 2011
Brimstone

what shows?
’cause i love the DC animated stuff
and Avatar: The Last Airbender

31 01 2011
p'bee

round the twist, spellbinder, mr squiggle, play school, bananas in pyjamas, ocean girl, the girl from tomorrow, ship to shore, were all fantastic. i don’t know the more recent ones so well, but the american kids’ shows always seem too concerned with teaching a big important lesson, and thye (at least to my mind) talk down to kids more than the australian kids’ tv shows ever have. the canadians also did fantastic kids’ tv – you can’t do that on television is one of the greatest things ever.
my personal favourite american animated shows were daria and pinky and the brain, haven’t seen as much in more recent years.

31 01 2011
TheBattlersPrince

Hermes Endakis was my hero…

31 01 2011
AlyssaKT

great shows!
Sings – “Have you ever read a book like this? Strange things happening and you’re going Round the Twist!”

31 01 2011
Brimstone

and thye (at least to my mind) talk down to kids more than the australian kids’ tv shows ever have

seems like so many Aussie and UK shows are amoral

Skins, Shameless, etc

31 01 2011
p'bee

i was thinking of things aimed at a slightly younger audience than skins. the american ones always seem to end with the nice little disney lessons, and everyone’s all happy ever after at the end of the little self-contained episode. australian kids’ shows give the audience more credit. have a look at spellbinder – aimed at kids from about 8 years up, it has an involved storyline, can be quite dark, but is incredibly good. the american kids series aimed at similar ages don’t hold up.
the effects do look a bit dodgy though.

31 01 2011
Shirley

The Americans did make Alex Mack for the same age group which was a fantastic show.

31 01 2011
TheBattlersPrince

I had a massive crush on Alex Mack…I think it was the whole transforming into primordial slime sans clothes…and the hat…

1 02 2011
Brimstone

same

1 02 2011
p'bee

was that the one with the girl who was in ten things i hate about you and then seemed to disappear without a trace? that was a good show.

1 02 2011
Shirley

That’s her.

10 02 2013
franz chong

I was Nineteen at the time Alex Mack was showing on the ABC and used to watch it when I got home from work on weekdays It was around Early 1997 and It was fantastic.

31 01 2011
Sheriff struggle

Dirt girl world rocks. On the other hand Yo Gabba Gabba and Wa Wa Wubzy are great. WWW seems to have a Devo obsession. Devo with a capital D, not the other kind.

1 02 2011
Pendant

Good to see some Daria love still exists. It’s a shame to think a similar show is unlikely to be produced any time in the near future

1 02 2011
p'bee

is it particularly pathetic to admit to have had a huge crush on trent from daria?

1 02 2011
Shirley

Perhaps it is, but if so then label me pathetic. I STILL have a crush on him. Mystic Spiral 4 eva.

2 02 2011
Pendant

I can only say that Mrs. Pendant still has a certain infatuation with Trent, so hopefully not.

3 02 2011
Tombarina

Adventure Island.

I drove my parents mad doing the jungle call. But they had it coming…

31 01 2011
Bag O'Turnips

I stand guilty of having the complete series of The Sopranos, the Solvol of soapies (i.e. it’s a gritty man soap).

As for other American shows, I wouldn’t mind buying and duly working my way through watching the West Wing, The Wire and Oz; these shows are proof that not all of US TV is unmitigated crapulence.

Outside of those few select series, there’s really little outside of the series typically produced by BBC, Channel 4, ABC and SBS I’d deign to watch.

31 01 2011
chubbybloodfart

I mean, Smallville ???
isn’t that about superman’s high school days?
Quality Stuff.
Quality.

31 01 2011
Brimstone

it’s crap
but it’s still better then most Aussie TV
hell are there any Australian sci-fi/fantasy shows?
i guess Farscape kinda counts. love that

31 01 2011
martin

Don’t forget we done “Tomorrow, when the war began”. Home & Away meets Red Dawn.

I look forward to the real Red Dawn remake.

31 01 2011
Benny Hill

ABC’s iView FTW. I knew I built a HTPC for a reason.

Oh and BTW we have Austar, no X in that either douche’s.

31 01 2011
Bag O'Turnips

As for electronic entertainment, I prefer to spend time online engaging, interacting and broadening my knowledge than watching television and when I do watch, I’m strictly an ABC and SBS man.

Regarding Fuxtel, they can go hang a salami for all I care…my old man had Galaxy back around 1996-97, just for the year, so he could watch the Italian channel and World Movies. But after putting up with incessant repeats week after week, he did not renew his subscription with those pay TV spivs: he just remained content to watch SBS and hire movies from the local Italian video store.

Again, one can rely on the wit and wisdom of TISM for a comment on just about anything in Australian culture, in this case about pay TV in the raucous “BFW” (Big Fücking Whoopee), which comes with a towering Ron Hitler-Barassi rant afterwards, but this line in the main song sums up this topic succinctly and perfectly:

Gilligan’s Island, rugby, Gilligan’s Island again…B-F-W!”

31 01 2011
Brimstone

HBO used to get made fun of constantly
until Oz and The Sopranos

31 01 2011
AlyssaKT

Oz and Sopranos – tick

31 01 2011
Bag O'Turnips

“Weird Al” Yankovic had a dig at all forms of televisual entertainment back in ’92 with “Can’t Watch This”, a parody that far surpassed its donor tune by MC Hammer, “U Can’t Touch This”; he namechecks Showtime, Playboy, MTV and of course HBO.

Admittedly, HBO has put together some of the finest TV to come out of America the last decade or so, thus making a mockery of the idea that everything American is rubbish, which of course it isn’t. Same could be applied to many other things they produce. However, for every amazing gem they uncover, there’s a dozen that are dross, turned out by painting-by-numbers formulas that seem to “entertain” a large, undifferentiated and small-minded demographic, to which bogans could easily fit into (and this is concomitant to TV “programs”, as it is to other goods Made In The US of A).

There’s not enough hours in the day for me watch telly, as I tend to be an “active” viewer, i.e. I need have my thoughts engaged when viewing; I don’t veg out on the couch and eventually fall asleep to the TV. And besides, I really don’t think Rupert needs my money…if there’s something I badly want to watch beyond FTA, I can find that I can get it on DVD, or on the Net, without much hassle.

Also agree with those who mentioned Aunty’s iView…excellent!

31 01 2011
martin

It’ll be nice to have Q&A back on again so I can have a laugh at all the pissed off libtards in the audience. I’m enjoying the new Grumpy series on ABC at the moment, The Office Season 7 is still good. That’s one thing the US did better than the UK imo. 🙂 Curb Your Enthusiasm and Entourage are a must see for me. Entourage being bogan I suppose but I don’t care.

Four corners and Foreign Correspondent are top quality but I find their content to be mostly too libtardish.

Has anyone been watching George Negus on channel 10 at 6pm? Any good?

31 01 2011
chubbybloodfart

I did see Negus. briefly
I love Negus.
it was ok, I mean I only saw a tiny bit…
but it looked credible-ish.
better soundtracck than 7:30. Surely George Negus is incorruptible…
I still couldn’t watch though. I can’t bear ad’s.
I like “the drum” on 24 thats my take on “getting perspective”
…I’m pretty seriously libtard.

31 01 2011
Tone

I’ve devised a series of One Question Bogan Tests , one of which being “Which version of ‘The Office’ is better: UK or US?”. If you answered “US”, you’re a bogan. Despite complaining about Americans, the typical bogan wishes they were a Yank. That, and they have this unwavering (and incorrect) belief that the US produces the best TV in the world.

31 01 2011
clairebbbear

I prefer the US version, and I’m definitely not a bogan. The UK version is too close to realism for me – I feel uncomfortable watching it, in the same way I feel uncomfortable watching Fawlty Towers. I like the warmth the US version has, and venture that Steve Carrell is an even bigger genius that Ricky Gervais (unless you’re talking Golden Globes hosting).

It is the only time I’ve ever thought the Americans did something better than the Brits. It will never happen again, don’t worry.

31 01 2011
p'bee

see, that awkward realism is why i think the uk version is absolute genius.

1 02 2011
Cherry

I think there’s a difference between “depressing” and “real”. Sure, the Americans sugar-coat their version of The Office…the way Michael can still be boss of branch after everything he’s put his staff through would be beyond astonishing. But The UK office seems to expend energy on a “glass half empty” perspective of work…Some people need to see what they do as positive and contributing, to get through the day, even if it isn’t. Some people don’t give a rats and can go through the motions and can hold an entirely negative perspective on their work and be fine with it.

I am the first sort of person, and I think this is why I much prefer the Americans’ The Office.

1 02 2011
martin

I actually find that Scranton’s performance being good even with having to put up with Michael Scott to be believable. I’ve worked in at least a couple of places where the culture was so bullying, so nepotistic and dictatorial that morale was in the gutter and people could not wait to leave. If a manager appears to be a good manager does not mean that they’re a good manager.

I like the US office because they do know that their work is shit, but that’s the way the world is, they can’t do anything about it, so why not have a laugh and a bit of fun. Just because a person is a ‘loser’ doesn’t mean they have to have a bad time and be depressed.

I think it challenges the the so called values and propaganda that are constantly rammed down our throat by the business world and gives a good and much deserved “go f#ck yourself” to it.

1 02 2011
James Hunter

Martin,
My personal experiences are that working for any american company is like being in a gulag. oppressive management, lack of respect for staff and a dollar driven approach to anything and everything that often cannot recognise long term benifits at the ecpense of short term gain. They generally have american managers unfamiliar with ways in other countries who have an absolute conviction that the american way is the only way and the best way. They are mostly a product of insular american universities insular MBAs .
My advise to any job seaker is if the place has an american CEO or if your superior is to be an american then go some other place . It wont be worth itYou will be expected to put the company ahead of yourself and your familyand to behave like a preprogramed dummy.

1 02 2011
martin

Even the theme song in the UK office and was used again in Extras was f$cking depressing. The lyrics basically went like ‘oh your dad had to work all week for a can of beans and now you’re a sad c$nt because you get a can of beans a day and for crying out loud you have the damned hide to want to buy a t-shirt’. I mean f$ck off man. Seriously. It was sort of pro the machine at the end of the day. The machine is a piece of f$cking shit, and I’m not even a libtard.

2 02 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms

You should be a libtard Martin. You’d be good at it and it would stop you getting bored.

2 02 2011
Davo

“libtard”? Sounds like something a bogan would say. Liberal & retard joined together to offend retarded people.

2 02 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms, Constant source of Randomness

Good guess Davo.

As repetitive as it sounds, it stands for “liberal retard.”

A libtard wants to live in a fantasy world (in which life is the way that they WISH IT WAS) as opposed to dealing with life the way it actually is.

(This explains the religious fervor that many of them demonstrate when it comes to smoking pot).

The most idealistic libtard envisions a time when science/technology and Socialism will eliminate all poverty, hunger, war, disease, injustice, unemployment and prejudice. (It is a nice pipe dream but human nature will forever stand in the way of that goal).

Most libtards subscribe to the notion that “people are basically good”, and build their foundation for activism and “improving the human condition” on that faulty premise. Because they deny the facts about human nature, their “reasoning” is diametrically opposite to common sense (blue states vs. red states).

The reality that people have different initiative levels, are basically selfish, and often work for their own interests before helping others, puts a libtard’s panties in a wad. So, when citizens will not voluntarily comply with various libtard prescriptions for “the common good”, then laws must be passed, or force used, to MAKE them comply. (It is the gradual path to totalitarianism).

2 02 2011
James Hunter

Davo, careful there .all Liberals are retarded, how else can they understand what Carnival Joyce, Christopher Pain, Foney Rabbit and Joe Hicky says ? Mind you all retarded people are not Liberals and thus the need for caution. To be a Liberal one needs money or aspirations or at least the hope of either.

2 02 2011
Urban Reverie, Libtard Extraordinnaire

I’d be careful with that whole “human nature” argument, Simon.

Two hundred years ago, slavery and serfdom were seen as a necessary and inevitable part of “human nature”.

One hundred years ago, women were denied the vote in most countries because they were, according to the prevailing view of “human nature”, so mentally fragile that they couldn’t possibly be trusted with the franchise.

Even in more recent times, the disabled were sterilised, the mentally ill were routinely locked up in abusive institutions and young unmarried mothers had their babies forcefully taken from them, all because the strong trampling on the rights and interests of the weak was seen as part and parcel of “human nature”.

All the progress we’ve seen in society over the past two or so centuries – the abolition of slavery, universal education, representative democracy, the welfare state, the extension of civil rights to Aborigines, the disabled and other minorities, laws to protect the environment – has come about because generations of libtards have had the courage and fortitude to stand up for what’s right and bring forth these changes.

Can injustice be ever eliminated entirely? Not entirely. Individual human beings aren’t perfect, so it stands to reason that societies aren’t either. There will always be a minority who turn bad, who are clinical psychopaths, or who have a propensity to violate the laws and norms, however reasonable, of whichever society they are in. But that’s not to say injustice can be lessened.

The moment that we start excusing injustice, oppression and other social evils as being a result of this supposedly immutable concept called “human nature”, the moment we raise the white flag and say that we shouldn’t do anything to eliminate evil because, hey, that’s just how the world is, deal with it – that, my friend, is when we start undoing all the progress we’ve achieved so far and start going down the gradual path of totalitarianism.

BTW I’m a libtard and I don’t touch weed at all! 🙂 Nor do any of the other libtards or libtardish people I know.

3 02 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms

Urban, good work, I can’t claim credit for mine, I copped it from the Urban Dictionary and chose that one because it included “panties in a wad” which appealed to me. I generally agree with you but temper my libtard leanings with a healthy dose of cynicism.

2 02 2011
martin

Yeah I seem to feel something of an affinity with libtard people. I guess it’s the lack of greed. I’m not a greedy person. Or at least I like to think so. And I hate materialism, or at least when people turn into wankers because of it. It just makes me want to smoke bongs.

Sometimes I like going to the library and I like it when the ( I assume they’re libtards ) librarians are nice to me. It makes me feel like I’m living in a society.

2 02 2011
Edward

My difficulty with U.K. Office is a strong conviction that Ricky Gervais is either a sociopath or has Narcissistic personality disorder. The show works because of it’s verisimilitude, but it isn’t comfortable viewing. The cast of the U.S. spin-off are acting. At least one of the British cast isn’t. There’s something which is just not right with Mister Gervais. He is clearly brilliant, but that is in itself symptomatic

2 02 2011
Tombarina

I think you’ve successfully diagnosed him on both counts, Dr Edward.

I remember the first time I saw an interview with him – for the first 5 minutes, I thought he was doing the interview in character, a la Chris Lilley or Dame Edna. Then it dawned on me that RG is, horrifyingly, only one polyester shirt removed from DB.

11 02 2011
Natlee

A friend of mine worked with Ricky Gervais in an office in the UK before he was on TV, and she said he is exactly like David Brent.

1 02 2011
Shirley

The UK and US versions are different beasts. The problem I see with the US version is that it’s been running for so long now the documentary angle isn’t believable. The Americans have always had a problem with ending things in a timely manner. I don’t believe the US characters are real people and never did. That some of them were well known actors in the first place didn’t help. The execution of the UK version is far superior. The way I see it, any show that can actually make me squirm with discomfort is genius. Furthermore, David Brent has far more depth to him that Carrell’s character.

2 02 2011
Tone

Bogans need to be told when to laugh. That’s why they don’t get many British and Australian (ABC) sitcoms that don’t have a laugh track. The only reason The Office (US) has slipped into the bogan consciousness is because the jokes are so blatant.

That, and Steve Carell is the new Rob Schneider.

2 02 2011
Tone

Shirl also made an excellent point about the US TV industry’s tendency to not only flog a dead horse, but to bury the horse, exhume it, commence flogging it again until it ends up being little more than a powder made of erstwhile equine, and then burying it again. For about 10 years … when Hollywood comes along, tries to sticky tape together what very few remnants of it remain, and then attaches a hackneyed feature-lengthed vehicle for a D-Grade stand up comedian that happened to give enough blowjobs to enough movie studio execs to get a movie deal out of them.

This, my friends, is why The Office (US) – and virtually every other UK to US transfer of a TV show – has been fecking awful.

2 02 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms, Constant source of Randomness

True dat. I have never watched US Office, why would I? The UK version was perfect.

2 02 2011
AlyssaKT

did anyone see ‘$#*! My Dad Says’ the other night? Disgraceful. Shit is right.

2 02 2011
Pandabater

Three fcking months they flogged that ad
& it was as shit as I new it would be.

*retrieves remote & reassembles*

2 02 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms, Constant source of Randomness

We also like to resurect. This is your life is coming back for the fourtyeleventh time.

Sh*t my dad says? You watched it, fools.

And whats the new one from 2 1/2 f*cksticks creator about fat people. One guess where the humor will be based.

2 02 2011
Pandabater

I want that 3 minutes back you bastards.
If the Today show was hit by a crashing
asteroid my grievance would be placated.
Please ensure this happens soon.

31 01 2011
martin

People who think the UK version is better are libtards who have an unbreakable aversion to ever saying that anything US could be better than anything UK.

Dwight is great. Steve Carrell is great. Kelly Kapoor. Kevin has made me laugh quite a few times. Even though I hated BJ Novak at the start he’s actually pretty talented too. The new people are all good so I hope it goes on for quite a few years yet because Steve is leaving soon.

I am flat out in love with Jenna Fischer. She is the most beautiful and lovely woman in Hollywood at the moment.

31 01 2011
Mick

Back off martin! Jenna is mine.

But I’ll agree on the US version. It took a while to grow on me but now I’m a big fan.

4 02 2011
v'visexxx!on

Hey , there is a newish comedy series on BBC at the moment which is based on the idea of a hit british comedy about a erudite private school headmaster and his students being picked up by an american network and being remade with Mat Le Blanc as the lead actor ( they change teh part from erudite, wordy headmaster to school coach for teh american version!) It’s called Episodes. I’ve seen two episodes and it’s warming up to being ok.

4 02 2011
AlyssaKT

Viv, I could swear you just said a show with Mat Le Blanc as the lead is actually okay??

4 02 2011
v'visexxx!on

Only because he plays a heightened version of himself in a role where he is aware that he is completely wrong as the lead in a series. Is that irony?? His wrongness of him being in it is the reason the show is funny. He plays up to it well.

4 02 2011
AlyssaKT

haha – sounds alright!

4 02 2011
v'visexxx!on

here is the trailer for it :

31 01 2011
Son of Duane

I’m one step closer to bogandom. I’ll admit I have an active connection to Fuxxxtel in my household, but only for the sport.

But I’m still going to cancel my subscription as more crap fills the channels, and use the money on a good Internet connection and some Usenet.

31 01 2011
barkeep @ ye olde glassing barn

We have Foxtel and any quality it had is declining. Lucky someone else pays for it 🙂 . As if I had to fork out for it, it probably would not be on. I used to love Discovery channel, now it is “We are building the biggest most maxtreme thing” with the U.S. voice over. Always over dramatising the story because who would would be interested in how a big building was created without a “PEARL HARBOUR” type introduction to every scene?
The short attention span is very clear as well with the, “as we said earlier” repeating every fact 5 times before moving on to the next, before coming back again to “recap”
Outside of that I like my AFL and do not always get the chance to be down at the pub.
To be clear I don’t watch free to air apart from ABC & SBS for the reason to me that they are more bogan than anything foxtel can offer. I really dislike having to watch any sporting event on FTA, as the Fast Food, Banks, Insurance & (insert name of coolest most talked about tv show) ads attempt to penetrate your brain and make a mindless zombie who has to purchase all of the above.

31 01 2011
Legless on Thalidomide

Come on ‘bra, Channel Noooiiiine is fuckin’ shithot. A Current Affair keeps us all safe from those bloody immigrants, shitty neighbours and dodgy TV repairmen.

1 02 2011
barkeep @ ye olde glassing barn

How could I forget?
I still think channel nooiine needs more Warnie. Between him commentating every session of the test matches (it seemed) and his face on Maccas ads (tv & sideboards) with also the lovely Advanced Hair adverts. I just could not get enough of him. That is all without having seen his new tv show where they think he will be the next Parky.
There appears to be no greater fear to the new male bogue than losing their hair if the ads are anything to go by. I love that Doogie Howser looking guy with the dubbed voice demanding that I give it a go. Or the one with that buff surfy looking guy who practically threatens you to “enjoy the confidence or i’ll glass ya carnt”. I guess what would they use all their hair product for if they lost it?

2 02 2011
Legless on Thalidomide

I’m new to TBL, if this hasn’t already been done may I suggest “the Bogue and consumeristic fear.”

31 01 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms

Ok, I have Foxtel. As a self confessed cycling nut I get all the Euro races etc. I also get Seinfeld, Are you being Served and Yes Minister not to forget Baywatch. It is pricey though and if I could figure out the interweb that would probably be the way to go.

Re quality programming we have much to thank the americans for with shows like Deadwood, Madmen, Sopranos, Seinfeld etc and like us they also produce plenty of crap but it all finds an audience. Any country that produces Neighbours, Hey Hey, ACA etc can’t afford to get too high and mighty.

11 02 2011
Natlee

Simon, I’m not too savvy on the interwebs, but I use a site called blinkx.com (unfortunate bogan X in there), where you can watch streamed shows of pretty much every series you can think of (well, that I can think of). Just recently I’ve watched Peep Show, 30 Rock, Dexter and Mad Men, all for free, whenever I want to.

11 02 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms, Constant source of Randomness

Cheers Nat, I just need to figure out my wireless thingy and then how to hook the computer up to the TV.

And this gigabyte thing, will I run out? How much do you need to stream TV shows. Every computer nerd I ask avoids the question as I don’t think they really know either.

11 02 2011
chubbybloodfart

this would be my suggestion
http://www.google.com.au/search?aq=1&oq=microtorrent&sourceid=chrome&ie=UTF-8&q=micro+torrent+software
top link should get you on the right path. but I’m a luddite so maybe the kids have something better these days.

11 02 2011
chubbybloodfart

crap. forgot to add this bit.
by way of download shows seem to be between 170-500mb. one hour show shouldn’t be more than 500, more likely about 350mb

11 02 2011
chubbybloodfart

still doesn’t answer yr question does it?

11 02 2011
Pendant

Nerds don’t want to answer because it completely depends on the source you stream from. You could probably watch about about 5hrs of low-res youtube for about 1GB, or about 1hr of 720p from an ‘official’ TV streaming site at the same cost. Obviously you should divide your GB allowance by one of the above rates to see how much TV you can stream. The better option though is to torrent the video files so you can watch them at your leisure. For that, follow this simple procedure.

Step 1. Download and install µTorrent from here.
Step 2. Head to eztv, the front page shows recent releases, or you can go to the show list and find what you’re after if it has aired in the last two years.
Step 3. Click one of the “down arrows” next to the episode you want, and choose to open the file (rather than save it), which should launch µTorrent.
Step 4. Choose where to save the downloaded file to in the dialog that appears. Probably a good idea to note the file size so you can count your downloads for the month.
Step 5. Upon completion, right click the download entry in µTorrent and choose ‘remove and delete torrent’ (DON’T delete the file). Now you can go find the file and watch it.

If you have trouble viewing the file, head here to grab a media player that can handle anything you can throw at it.

Bonus step: If you’re a Firefox user you should head here to grab an addon that can keep you up to date with how much bandwidth you have remaining on your internet plan.

Good luck, have fun!

11 02 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms, Constant source of Randomness

Thanks Pendant, makes sense I think. I will have a go.

And also thanks Chubs,

11 02 2011
Natlee

Simon, I have absolutely no idea about that sorry. All I know is when I click on the button, a TV show comes on.

31 01 2011
Blueballs

Foxtel only thrives because the FTA stations are run by old school fuckwits who think that since they cornered the market in 1956, they can get away with lazy programming for eternity. Evidence? Who brought back Hey Hey???

31 01 2011
Brimstone

and why is every good show at a stupid timeslot?
i used to be loyal to whoever showed Dexter but they kept moving it around
even ABC2 programs it’s best shows on Thursday or Friday, when i’m out

31 01 2011
chubbybloodfart

I get ya.
If foxtel gave us anything it is Time Shift.
you need a twin tuner HD recorder or somesuch to watch telly now.
so you can record when you’re out and skip the ads if yr not.

31 01 2011
Brimstone

everyone in America has TIVO
you barely need it here

1 02 2011
Cherry

They’re owned by none of those who started out in ’56…The Packers have nothing to do with Nine these days and Ansett Airlines pulled out of Seven decades ago. And Ten didn’t exist until 1960.

If you saw what Frank Packer had on in 1957, THEN you’d know what poor TV was…Historically we’ve been swamped by the yanks, because the tightwads in Australian TV are determined to make big money out of what is at heart part of the Arts.

American TV has the luxury of not making nearly the % of returns, thus they have a wider freedom to experiment and make cutting edge TV. And the UK has public majority control over the content (we almost got that too, no thanks to Menzies) so there’s an imperative to turn out at least some good TV.

31 01 2011
TheBattlersPrince

The post today has inspired me to pen a haiku. I think it’s half bogan, half existentialist spin really:

Foxtel on the blink
The pub is shut so no drink
My life is over

31 01 2011
Brimstone

Haikus don’t rhyme

31 01 2011
chubbybloodfart

that one did

31 01 2011
TheBattlersPrince

Haikus don’t HAVE to rhyme…there’s no hard or fast rule….I know I’ve probably lost all hope of achieving Zen by rhyming in a haiku, but hey, it’s 5-7-5, it’s a haiku:

Haikus do not rhyme
If they do they will disrupt
All space and all time

31 01 2011
Pandabater

Electricity
Lines are down so no TV
Battery shrinking

31 01 2011
Nelson Esq

Don’t have Foxtel and don’t think I ever will. By the sounds of it, Foxtel has repeats of Seinfeld, The Nanny, and old 1970’s British stuff. Cripes, if I want to watch that shit I’ll just turn to the new free Digital Channels like GO, GEM and 7MAAAAAAAAATE!

31 01 2011
chubbybloodfart

…and all the “new” content is old crap from foxtel

10 02 2013
franz chong

That’s true.THE New digital Channels is where the old shows go to die or get recycled.

31 01 2011
EsDee

I ventured back into Facebook territory today.

And voila, crimes against spelling.

Some 30 odd people belong to “Affecionados of Things Bogans Like”. Is this a spelling I am not aware of?

“Ironically”, the admin belongs to “Its pronounced “You” not “Youse”, get it right you bogan”

31 01 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms

When I have ventured across to faceplant all I see are crimes against humanity. Who are these people and how DO you follow the threads with all the likes and some such. I have solemly vowed never to visit again so help me baby jeebus.

2 02 2011
Tone

Yep, the TBL Facebook page is – for the most part – bloody awful these days. I remember when it was quite decent, but that was back when less than 1,000 people liked it.

31 01 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms

You know what’s wrong with all TV. No f#cking Monkee. Everything else gets rerun except Monkee.

*Born from an egg on a mountain top*

Can someone call me Douche, I feel left out today.

31 01 2011
TheBattlersPrince

31 01 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms

Thanks Prince!

31 01 2011
TheBattlersPrince

Always here as a constant source of randomness Simon…

31 01 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms

My mind just works that way, sometimes for good, sometimes….

But everyone loves Monkey!

31 01 2011
Pandabater

Ya giant douche.

31 01 2011
Pandabater

Oops, forgot the 😉
😉

31 01 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms

OOOH, thanks dude.

31 01 2011
Bag O'Turnips

That reminds me: I should get out the Monkey series and watch it from start to end. Forgotten a lot of it now, but would love to reacquainted.

Been a very long time since I watched it, back when ABC1 was known simply as “Channel 2”.

31 01 2011
Davo

I miss old time violent kids shows.

31 01 2011
p'bee

i love both of you.

31 01 2011
Brimstone

i miss Monkees reruns on VH1

31 01 2011
Mick

Catweazle.

Where the hell is Catweazle?

31 01 2011
martin

I always thought Tripitaka was a girl.

1 02 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms

Yeh, go Catweazel, and I want secret squirrel back too!

1 02 2011
martin

I want “Now you see it” back. Also “Wombat” and “Simon Townshend’s Wonderworld”. Kids of today have bad taste and the old stuff is way better than the new stuff.

1 02 2011
Mick

The Curiosity Show with Dean and Rob.

Maybe I was a nerdy kid after all.

1 02 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms

Roger Ramjet! Anyone who says Young Talent Time gets glassed.

1 02 2011
martin

Nice one. Cartoon Connection with Alex Wileman.

Big hair. I prefer big hair to all these faux hawks and stuff.

1 02 2011
p'bee

double dare.
i’ll still say physical challenge if someone says double dare. sadly not many people say double dare around me anymore.
oh, and dangermouse and bananaman.

1 02 2011
martin

Nah, double dare was what started the downfall, like Nickelback and all those types of bands.

1 02 2011
p'bee

but physical challenge! how can you compare any show that had physical challenge to nickelback?

1 02 2011
v'visexxx!on

Best show of the 80’s was Now You See It with Mike Meade and Marvin the robot. I searched op shops for about 6 years before i found one of the tshirts that were given away as a prize!

1 02 2011
v'visexxx!on

Melvin the robot , not marvin…..

1 02 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms

Marvin was in Hitchhickers guide, more 80’s gold.

Who was the robot in Perfect Match? I am sure you will know V’v.

1 02 2011
Shirley

Dexter!

1 02 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms

That’s it. There have been so many cr*p TV robots it is hard to remember.

Bert Newton, Kate Richie, Georgie Parker. They just all meld into one.

1 02 2011
martin

I saw on TT or ACA that Greg Evans got married to his co host Debbie. Bronzed old skool Aussie bliss.

1 02 2011
v'visexxx!on

Debbie Newsom? was that her name?? I had a friend call her rottweiler Delvine after Delvine Delaney (Sale of the century) – perfect name for a dog! An does anyone remember Edith Bliss form Simon Townsend’s Wonder World. In case you forget, here she is with her first hit single….

1 02 2011
v'visexxx!on

She looks like a permed, stunned mullet.

1 02 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms

Delvine is a name ripe for a reboot

Do the honours please V’v.

Also if I may make a shameful admission. I have never really heard of someone called L-a or ABCDE……..

1 02 2011
v'visexxx!on

Dellveene

D’lvean

Dulvehne

Dalvihnne

It’s such a pretty name, I’m surprised it hasn’t had a comeback yet.

1 02 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms

Nice work. I’m surprised you are talking to me after my confession. Seems I may be the only person in aust if the Names page is anything to go by!

1 02 2011
v'visexxx!on

I assumed you were joking. Everybody knows an L-Da….

1 02 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms

I was also thinking a silent g could work

Gduhlveeene?

1 02 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms

I have carried that shameful secret too long. It was becoming an impediment in my life.

1 02 2011
v'visexxx!on

don’t stop at one silent g – try Gduhlveigne before you fill out the birth certificate…

1 02 2011
p'bee

d’elleveiygnhe

1 02 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms

That’s it. One g is rarely enough.

1 02 2011
martin

Yeah that’s it Debbie Newsom. I’m glad I’ve never had to call anyone Debbie.

1 02 2011
martin

I want it! Leave it to me in your will Vivisection.

1 02 2011
v'visexxx!on

Sure, and then you’ll kill me…. I know how that scam works.

1 02 2011
martin

Nah I’ll just pay a bogan to do it like in Underbelly.

1 02 2011
martin

It’s just the vibe man. Too American, too cheesy.

10 02 2013
franz chong

I agree Martin.What would Simon Townsend assuming he is still alive think of Ten putting the Bold and the Beautiful on Today where his show existed from 1979 to 1987.

12 02 2013
martin

I was on STWW, I wonder if that makes me bogan, he was a conscientious objector and went to jail so no.

I won a hacky sack.

2 02 2011
Edward

It’s a comparable thing to the tradition of casting an actress in the role of Peter Pan in stage productions. She doesn’t have the problems which would attend the onset of puberty in (juvenile) male actor. Thus, unlike much of Chinese opera which have male actors playing all roles, and female impersonation is an integral skill for performers, the role of the boy-priest is played by a woman. Language trivia, Tripitaka means “sacred book” in China (Mandarin) and in Chinese Korean.

4 02 2011
EsDee

Borrowing Pendant’s hat.

Tripitaka is Sanskrit, not Chinese. It means three baskets. But full marks for knowing all about it.

I am in Perth and am yet to encounter boganity. How is this possible?

And how did a bar in Northbridge get called Ezra Pound who I dimly recollect being an anti-semite.

4 02 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms, Constant source of Randomness

Are you sure you are in Perth EsDee?

4 02 2011
Bag O'Turnips

Here’s a tip: if you want to encounter bogans, easy: go to either the Harbour Town factory outlets in West Perth, Centro Galleria in Morley, Westfield Carousel in Cannington, Westfield Whitfords City in Hillarys or if you’re up for the train ride, to dead heart of CUB/NaB-dom, Lakeside Joondalup.

All these locations will guarantee you an opportunity to spot the West Aussie variant of the modern bogan in their natural habit, doing what they do best, like spending money that isn’t really theirs on crap they don’t need and those with loinfruit scrooming out at their ridiculously named spawn with explicit threats of violence for their noncompliant behaviour.

After this experience however, be sure to wash yourself down and then head off to a Beaufort Street bar or café to mitigate the negative effects of what you’ve just seen!

4 02 2011
EsDee

Simon, I pinched myself and checked, it is Perth. Though it does seem to have a lot of Poms so who knows.

BoT thanks for all the tips, so much to explore so little time! Beaufort St sounds good!

7 02 2011
Edward

You may be thinking of his contemporary, Enoch Powell (who was a sophisticated anti-immigration figure and when approached by the National Front sent them off with an articulate bee in their ear).

Ezra Pound was considerably more liberal figure. I don’t recall him having been associated with anti-semitism or any other form of bigotry. He was decidedly antithetical to such things, I think.

31 01 2011
duxlux

Ok I’ll admit it. I have it. After watching Murdoch decimate rugby league it suddenly stung me there might be something more than just sport. My other half was interested in the girly stuff, so in the end I relented.

Apart from watching the hilarious bouffant antics of ‘Jerseyliscious’ or the IVF paranoia of ‘Guliana and Bill’ (you are way too skinny to have kids gal, just face it!) there ain’t too much doin’ on Foxtel.

Reruns of Nigella Bites (from 10 years ago when she looked hot!), The 20/20 Big Bash. I could live without out it – but then there is Jersey Shore isn’t there (no I really can’t stomach these people, they are appalling).

I almost forced myself into watching ‘Keeping up with the Kardashians’, but apart from the eye candy and plastic surgery, it’s about as exciting as being beaten mindlessly with a piece of 4×2. Go away people I hate your lives!

The only joy I’ve had in the last few months was watching ‘North and South’ Part 2 in it’s entirety, with Pat Swayze and Lesley Anne Down. Love a bit of killing and war, plus it’s the only piece of history that doesn’t involve WW2 on Fox.

Speaking of which, is the History Channel merely trying to reinforce the victors (ie Murdoch/US) view of history. FOr example, I bet you don’t see a program called “The Super League Wars 1995-1997” on The History Channel any time soon. Murdoch actually lost ($$$) on that one big time…

Wanna play Xbox anyone?

31 01 2011
Brimstone

yeah, but i can’t get it connected to my mobile broadband

31 01 2011
Löuie

That’s why LCD HD WTF TVs now have USB slots and ISPs feature 500GB accounts. Entertainment via another acronym the bogan doesn’t know about.

TPB.org.

31 01 2011
Ash -Glasser of C*nts, Kicker of Hipsters and Massive Can Connossieur

My flatmates wanted to get Foxtel – I didn’t mind as long as I didn’t have to pay for it.

Now I get ESPN and my fill of basketball and American football, along with every league game and plenty of extra coverage – so I think I got a good deal.

31 01 2011
The Bogan from 'Berra

I have two foxtel boxes in the house, one IQ, one normal. Thinking about ditching my existing account and upgrading my internet package instead so i can use Foxtel over Xbox360. Sick of paying $130-ish/month when i don’t even watch most of the channels.

31 01 2011
chubbybloodfart

demonoid.de
yeah I wanna play XBox. and I’ll email Frisky Dingo to anyone who can afford the bandwidth. just in the last set of twelve we start seeing TB plug and play devices go under $100, speeds miraculosly tripled and finally the idea of charging for data is becoming gauche. Looks like there are plenty catching on.
personally I look forward to not having to be a fûcking leech. my overall ratio for about the last three years is like .32. it’s rude and embarrassing.
My Bogan sister told me last year that secret agent men were tracking folk on TPB and busting them so she wouldn’t go there. she goes to isohunt. whatever. She’s obviously a Moron but hand up who thinks BTTV is doomed? who wins: sony or vodaphone?.

1 02 2011
Pendant

isohunt simply indexes other trackers these days, one of which is tpb, so there’s still pretty good odds of ending up on a tpb torrent via isohunt. The extent to which people are ‘tracked’ by copyright holders is that your ISP might receive a nasty letter on your behalf. TPG I know doesn’t give out your personal details in response to these letters, but it wouldn’t surprise me if the likes of Telstra did.

1 02 2011
Cherry

This might help a little bit for your BTTV:

http://phoenixlabs.org/pg2/

I have received an email forwarded from the Business Software Alliance about sharing ye old Super Nintendo Roms over Gnutella2, and my ISP is TPG. But only one from memory.

(don’t these sad f***s have anything better to do with their time than “protect” 20 year old bytes?)

26 03 2011
chubbybloodfart

never did say thanks for that.
thanks for that.

1 02 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms

http://www.heraldsun.com.au/entertainment/confidential/charlie-sheen-toothless/story-e6frf96o-1225998000125

One of Charlies lovely girlfriends is spilling the beans on him. Will there now be a run on dentists by the bogans trying to emulate their hero?

1 02 2011
Mick

TBl #485. Toilet Paper.

Up here in FNQ we are preparing for a rather nasty looking cyclone. Folk are a bit on edge so I understand the panic buying. However, I do not understand the panic buying of toilet paper. The shelves were bereft of bread, milk, tinned goods and toilet paper. We’ll lose power for three or four days, maybe more, but unless these people have electric bum-wipers at home, it is just odd.

I will get Simon and Ash to glass the first person who makes a joke about people so scared that they shit themselves.

1 02 2011
AlyssaKT

You can get through a whole 9 pack of toilet paper during a weekend house party – perhaps they figure they’ll make an event of it?!

I don’t doubt they’re also buying trolley loads of cartons of beer at the bottle shop…

1 02 2011
Mick

The grog is already flowing, yes. But, for the FNQ bogan, panic buying of alcohol happens every other day. A natural occurance.

1 02 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms

Seriously Mick. Good luck with this one, it is a big sucker. I have been through a couple when in North WA and they are not fun.

People also buy candles but won’t they just get blown out?

1 02 2011
Mick

This is the first one in 20 years up here that has me worried. Mate has an old place and he was just making plans on how to get to my place if his goes. And anyone with kids we’ve told to go.

We’ve never talked like that before.

1 02 2011
1 02 2011
AlyssaKT

a coworker’s brother who works for Energex just told him he’s being flown into Mackay on Thursday morning to help with the fallout.
That doesn’t make sense to me!
Either fly now before it, or Friday after it? In between the winds will be too strong to fly into?
I imagine he’ll be waiting at the airport a long while…

1 02 2011
Mick

Mackay will be missed by this maggot farmer apparently. it’ll be the closest big centre not affected so that’ll be why.

1 02 2011
AlyssaKT

still windy – still bad conditions… I wouldn’t fly through it – would you?

1 02 2011
v'visexxx!on

Pity – if anywhere should be blown off the map it’s that sh!thole Mackay – and I say that as a former resident.

1 02 2011
Shirley

Same thing happened here in Brisbane during the floods. Apparently during a natural disaster, a huge portion of society plans to shit and eat sandwiches until it’s all over.

Keep yourself and your loved ones safe Mick.

1 02 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms

Some things just don’t stop for natural disarsters and poo is one of them it seems.

1 02 2011
AlyssaKT

I was about to say you could just go and wash your bum in the water in the backyard and the water wouldn’t look any different. Then thought better of it.

1 02 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms

Or use XXXX without noticable change to the flavour.

1 02 2011
James Hunter

one way to get a head

1 02 2011
v'visexxx!on

Maybe the bread’s for wiping when the toilet paper’s run out? Not quite wonder white anymore…

1 02 2011
James Hunter

saves on vegamite

1 02 2011
AlyssaKT

it mightn’t be as silly as it sounds – I heard some joker near Mackay was selling 4 packs of toilet rolls for $25 during the floods…

2 02 2011
1 02 2011
martin

That sucks Mick. I think Sydney is more deserving of a cyclone. I wish we’d get one, I’m bored. A lot of these bogan bitches down here deserve a good hammering.

1 02 2011
Mick

Don’t worry martin, most of them here deserve it as well.

I’ve been doing the rounds and everybody seems to be cleaned up and ready. Except for the bogans. They buy a shitload of toilet paper(see what I did there?), but won’t clean up there yards. Just talking to a mate about a star picket that speared through a light post in Innisfail five years ago. That’s scary.

2 02 2011
big mad boat man

hysterical hearing the lady mayoress of cairns having to tell people not to put their bins out

1 02 2011
Bag O'Turnips

The cyclone that was supposed to hit Perth on Sunday didn’t—heck, it was worse on Saturday, when some suburbs (including mine) had a brief deluge: thank goodness I’d cleaned my gutters beforehand! However, some other towns in the South West and Central South, particularly York, copped some moderate damage caused by gale force winds.

1 02 2011
Mick

I only just avoided that one in Hedland. We were the last flight out that day. Closed the airport soon after.

1 02 2011
p'bee

you know what that means, don’t you mick? the weather gods have it in for you. cyclones are going to keep following you around.
stay safe.

2 02 2011
Pandabater

I see that the cyclone has been uprated
from Steve Jacobs to Karl Stefonovic.
Keep your head down everybody. 😉

2 02 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms, Constant source of Randomness

If it gets to a Laurie Oakes then we are all screwed.

2 02 2011
v'visexxx!on

Suicide is the only choice if it gets to Kerri-Anne

2 02 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms

*whispers “Warnie”*

1 02 2011
Chocolate Frog

What have the Romericans ever done for us?
Besides………

2 02 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms, Constant source of Randomness

The bogan and trashmedia are disappointed to learn our cyclone is not as strong as Katrina yet.

2 02 2011
Mick

Bloody fucking trashmedia go to hell and die. Why can’t they just report the situation and be happy with that. Like the ABC does. We’re all prepared. We don’t need the worst case scenario told every second. We already know what that can be. It’s just scaring people unnecessarily. I’ve lost count of the number of phone calls I’ve got from around the country today.

I had a young backpacker at my front door this morning in tears. She had no idea what to do but knew everything bad that could happen. I took her and her mate to the evacuation centre and gave them a rundown on what to do. And to listen to the ABC. They were much calmer. it was all they needed. And bonus points, if I still have a house tomorrow they’re coming for a bbq.

Trashmedia, please focus on what to do, not what can happen.

2 02 2011
Tombarina

Some of today’s hysteria-inducing media lowlights:

* Ipswich-something-or-other warning of a tsunami
* Some super-excited dickhead on Nein saying winds would “top 400km/hr”
* Online report (I think it was one of Uncle Rupert’s merry mastheads) tipping a “staggering” body count

I hope Yasi is a disappointment on all counts. People up there are genuinely frightened, and this sort of shit alleged ‘coverage’ isn’t for their benefit and enlightenment – it’s for the entertainment of the slavering hordes down south.

ABC, the BOM, Emergency Mgt Qld and, amazingly, some of the Facebook sites like Queensland Police Service and Ergon Energy are the only sources worth listening to.

2 02 2011
Mick

Two that had my hackles up.

The first on tv. Weather fella was being interviewed. He says Yasi crosses the coast a few hours after high tide. Interviewer goes to break, comes back and informs the world that Yasi is to cross the coast at high tide with horrific results.

Second was headline I just read. ‘Countdown to Catastrophe’. Arseholes.

2 02 2011
p'bee

was that on nein? interview an expert who gives serious, but measured, warnings, then compare yasi to an atomic bomb complete with a shockwave going out of their graphic?

2 02 2011
Tombarina

Oh, yeah – Mr 400km/hr, he of the Nagasaki Prophecy, was on Nein.

2 02 2011
Mick

no, channel 7. For some obscure reason I thought they would be better than that.

I’ll put it down to stress.

2 02 2011
Tombarina

A pox on both their houses.

2 02 2011
Tombarina

That first one prompted a panicked phone call from an elderly couple in Cardwell.

They’re well set-up and organised with a cyclone bunker, but hadn’t factored a wall of water drowning them or sweeping them away which, according to Cockhead Alleged Weatherman, was their certain destiny.

I pointed them to some reputable info which reassured them that they were above any predicted surge mark, but could have rammed Cockhead Alleged Weatherman’s mike up his no-doubt-bleached arse. Scaring the Christ out of two decent old people in their 80s, just for the sake of a bit of sensationalist shit….

2 02 2011
p'bee

the reporting’s been really poor. on the one hand there’s the almost apocalyptic language and references to atomic bombs and countdown clocks, and on the other they keep repeating the completely inaccurate line about yasi not being as strong as katrina. katrina was only a category three when it hit new orleans.

2 02 2011
urbanreverie

And p’bee, talking of sensationalist scaremongering, take a look at this:

http://www.news.com.au/breaking-news/floodrelief/how-cyclone-yasi-compares-around-the-world/story-fn7ik2te-1225998762870

The suggestion that Cyclone Yasi would result in 300km/h winds in an area stretching from Canada to Mexico, from Pennsylvania to Nevada, can only be made by some dimwit News Ltd tabloid hack who has all the meteorological knowledge of a turkey who had to repeat Year 3 five times.

3 02 2011
v'visexxx!on

That made me wonder what the hell was being called reporting in this day and age too?? More disaster porn…..

3 02 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms, Constant source of Randomness

Yeah, there was an article in the Scum yesterday where some dimwit was comparing how the cyclone would look on other countries. It showed the cyclone basically covering the entire USA. I thought that does not look right so got the satellite immage, printed it off, cut it out and placed it over QLD and it covered about 1/2 of QLD give or take a bit.

Now given the USA is 20% bigger than Aus there was some serious scale fudging going on there. I sent them a comment questioning their motivation behind this and suggesting some dire consequences for said journalist but again this remains unpublished by the Scum.

3 02 2011
TheBattlersPrince

Fairfax are discussing “Online community divided this morning as to whether media treatment of Yasi was OTT or On The Money.”

http://www.smh.com.au/environment/weather/cyclone-yasi-live-blog–thursday-20110203-1aea7.html

BTW, ;ike the new addition to the name Simon ;p

3 02 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms, Constant source of Randomness

Cheers Prince, I chose to see it as a compliment?!

3 02 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms, Constant source of Randomness

Urban, replied prior to clicking your link. Same story, how, the f*ck do they get away with this. It is not even close to realistic. My dog laughed at it.

2 02 2011
Sybil Ince

Surely only Australians and Americans would be dense enough to pay someone else to watch their own tv?

And Muz: There’s a definite herd mentality on this site. Although the lemming myth isn’t true, think lemmings and you’ll get the idea.

2 02 2011
big mad boat man

my many acquaintoids in FNQ sound more nervous than I’ve ever heard. and these are not cats disposed to anxiety.
last chance to wish youse all the best. hold on to your big arse BobKat hats.
all the best.
Sincerely.

2 02 2011
big mad boat man

hold tight queensland

2 02 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms, Constant source of Randomness

Is the Wednesday post on hold for the Cyclone? C’mon Harley Davidsons please for Mick. I think he needs something bright.

Good luck FNQers.

2 02 2011
martin

Yeah where’s my Wednesday post? I’m BOOOOORRED and feeling very ENTITLED to it. Julia Gillard should give us some middle class welfare to pay TBL for regular posts.

2 02 2011
martin

Fuck it’s hot. Fuck this shit. That’s another TBL, Hot Weather.

2 02 2011
Tone

Not quite. Bogans like complaining about weather. Too hot, too cold, too wet, not wet enough, too windy … and they also like to blame meteorologists for causing weather evens.

2 02 2011
AlyssaKT

And blame the Government for extreme weather causing flooding…

2 02 2011
James Hunter

Alyssa,
‘course the govmint caused the flooding. if they had dun sumfing about the cliamate change it would’n happened.

2 02 2011
Mick

yeah! harleys!

I’m bored with waiting. Entertain me.

2 02 2011
Pandabater

This is the guy you’re looking for.

http://www.goingfaster.com/angst/noharley2.html

He’s thorough.

2 02 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms, Constant source of Randomness

I haven’t time to read the whole thing just yet but the summation is perfect.

“Harley Davidson. It’s not a motorcycle company. It is a pagan cult religion for brain dead trend humping fashion lemmings.”

2 02 2011
James Hunter

He does ramble on a bit but he sure has the basics right. A Ducati Desmo goes like stink, handles , has suspension that works and sounds better as well.. The article did not mention that other great Italian vee. The Moto Guzzi , shaft drive engine that talks soooo sweet. Funny thing a fair few yanky police forces use Moto Guzzis.What does that say to Harley ??

2 02 2011
Pandabater

Where I live it is beach side as well as heavy industry & I live on a busy intersection that goes to both. So I have the pleasure of their 130db of shit 24/7. I FCKING HATE THEM.
Phew, sorry to shout there but the worst thing is because the police have done nothing to stop Harleys from having NO Catalytic converter & NO Muffler everybody who owns a twin cylinder bike does the same. Now its a free-for-all. I might take the exhaust off my car, see how long I last. Rant ends.

2 02 2011
Mick

Dont forget the Aprilla JH. Everyone forgets the Aprillas.

Excellent little rant you found Panda. The Harley added greatly to my drinking problem. Every pub we stopped at on ride days was able to serve me a couple of extra drinks while we waited for the harleys to show up. By the end of the day we would be legless and have to get a room. All because the harley rider was still looking in the bushes on the side of the ride for his carby.

2 02 2011
James Hunter

Mick,
It used to be you could drive down a street and tell who had either a Harley or a Triumph by the oil stains on the drive way. result of course machining and cheap gaskets that went hard.

2 02 2011
Pandabater

Do they sell Loctite at Harley shops?

Hey can that be a new “Is the pope etc”?

2 02 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms, Constant source of Randomness

You can be sure they sell KY jelly for the owners, so they can you know….

2 02 2011
Mick

I believe the Popemobile is a harley.

It fits perfectly. An elderly man on a slow-moving ride waving and thinking everyone is impressed with him.

2 02 2011
James Hunter

Mick, except the Harley riders always have black hats the popes are always white.

2 02 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms, Constant source of Randomness

Q-What does a Harley and a hemorrhoid have in common?

A-Sooner or later every asshole gets one.

http://www.goingfaster.com/angst/jokes.htm

A truckload of Harley jokes.

2 02 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms, Constant source of Randomness

Hey Mick, what’s happening up there?

2 02 2011
Mick

Simon, looks like Mission Beach to Cardwell is going to be hammered. I feel for them. it will be nasty. I think most of Cardwell has been evacuated because of a storm surge coming. Lucinda near Ingham as well. cardwell is going to be the big mess but.

I’ll be good…we’ll just get gales i hope. Supposed to start blowing here in an hour or two. Most of my suburb was evacuated but I’m high so things should be okay.

I’ll tell you, one thing this morning shook me up. The young English girl I helped this morning. That’s the first time in my life that I have seen someone breakdown because of fear for their life. That had me on edge for most of the day until i realised the worst would miss us.

2 02 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms, Constant source of Randomness

Good luck dude. Hope you can give us a thumbs up in the morrow.

2 02 2011
Mick

Ta. You won’t see me for a few days I reckon. Power will probably go in an hour or two. We’ll all be living caveman for a while. Next two days will be clean up what we can and then wait for the big guns to do the big jobs.

2 02 2011
Pandabater

Stay safe Mick,

Go easy on that dunny paper now.

🙂

2 02 2011
p'bee

we are expecting a full report on the state of toilet paper stocks in far north queensland after this.

2 02 2011
urbanreverie

All the best to you Mick, and hope things turn out OK. I hope you don’t get blown away, we need a TBL correspondent from the North! 😉

2 02 2011
Tone

Bold, fearless prediction: Yasi will become a popular name for young femmebogue spawn in the near future.

Another bold, fearless prediction: Westpac will raise their interest rates next week in response: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gzbBUC3XsPs

2 02 2011
Urban Reverie, Libtard Extraordinaire

I wonder whether there was a spike in the number of baby girls named Tracy in September 1975, Tone? 🙂

I can’t find any data for months. But I did find data for years, in Victoria ..

1974
Tracey = 231 births
Tracy = 110 births

1975
Tracey = 160 births
Tracy = 145 births

So, the total number of Tracey/Tracys in Victoria fell slightly. BUT .. the relative proportion of Tracys against Traceys rose significantly. Perhaps the name of Cyclone Tracy (without an E) influenced parent’s spelling decisions?

2 02 2011
Pandabater

I do not believe my eyes,
Today Tonight has a
cyclone countdown clock
“Rolling” on the screen.
The depth of my offence
can not be measured.
In 4:19:24 the death count
graphic comes up.

2 02 2011
Mick

When my new English friends return home, I’m going to get them to petition the Queen to have Today Tonight and all who sail in her executed.

Does Queenie still have that sort of clout?

2 02 2011
p'bee

if she does i may just become a monarchist out of gratitude.

2 02 2011
Pandabater

Not officially but, you know.

One sometimes must sacrifice
the few to save the many.

2 02 2011
Mick

Cool.

I wonder what type of flash uniform the members of Queenie’s black-ops wear. I’m sure it would be fabulous AND dignified.

2 02 2011
Pandabater

Supplied by Harrods

Official Royal Outfitters,

Since 1997

2 02 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms, Constant source of Randomness

Is there no low they will not stoop too?

2 02 2011
Pandabater

No Simon, they will bask in the sea of misery
until the story runs out of puff.
I hear there is a new wonder bra
coming out soon. Details Friday night.

2 02 2011
Mick

Yasi wears a wonder bra?

Whoever would have thought…

2 02 2011
p'bee

that’s how she gets that boost in size.

2 02 2011
Edward

Seen last night at the local watering hole: a white late model Holden Commodore with “My Family” stickers on the left rear passenger door window (first time I’ve seen them), Ed Hardy seat covers, five spoke alloy sports-wheel (showing off the brightly coloured brake discs) and low profile tyres. To the owners credit, he/she had the original badging and didn’t have vanity plates. It was still a rolling cliche.

3 02 2011
Mick

TBL# 942. Stupid Debates.

Bogans are ringing up radio stations and arguing the point over the use of hunker down or bunker down. There’s a few more important things to worry about today.

3 02 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms

Mick, good to see ya. Report please buddy.

You hunker in a bunker. Simple.

3 02 2011
Mick

Report when power comes back. I’m doing this on my phone and it’s bloody annoying.

3 02 2011
p'bee

take your time. let us know whether it is hunker or bunker, and tell us how the toilet paper stocks are going.
in all seriousness, though, good to hear that you’re fine and that everything seems to have gone as well as it could have.

4 02 2011
v'visexxx!on

MICK: DO YOU HAVE ENOUGH BREAD??? I”LL POST SOME FOR $30 A LOAF

3 02 2011
HappyFriend

The ‘Crisis Junkies’ on Channels 9,7,10 respectively were wrong about Cyclone Yasi wiping off half of Queensland. A shame, it would’ve improved the country.

3 02 2011
lolplates

i was going to get Foxtel when FTA didn’t get the rights to Indycar, but now Indycar streams live from their website. 🙂 No Foxtel for me yay!!!

3 02 2011
Discount Wetware!

I spent many years in the tully mission beach area. many was the time I prayed to baby jesus to blow it all away.
sorry about that.
I didn’t actually think he was real.
I promise to be much more careful in future.

3 02 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms, Constant source of Randomness

You and the baby jesus need to be more careful Discount. I believe you two also had a hand in judgeing SEQ with cricket ball sized hail stones!

3 02 2011
Discount Wetware!

right.
I am so so sorry.
I could never have imagined it would be like this.
When Prayers Come True tastes like FU#KED!!!
I was channel surfing watching the video coming in. Kochie gives Anna Bligh the thumbs up. She too must have been praying to Baby Jesus to resurrect her political career. Bogans will never remember why they hated her in the first place, only that she croiyed on telly,
so she’s rool.
oh wait…
I’m having a vision…
it’s Anna Bligh in soft focus on the cover of the ‘Weekly (available monthly).
180 years from now Anna Bligh will be canonised for some obscure and thinly attested miracles. web footed Catholic Queenslanders of the future will build a floating memorial to Saint Anna from empty plastic water bottles, ancient deck chairs, glitter and silt (these being Qld’s most abundant resources in the future)
Baby Jesus is a capricious and fickle c*nt

3 02 2011
Tombarina

Mission Beach is home to The Shrubbery, possibly the greatest and most ludicrously chilled bar/eatery/I-know-not-what in the known universe. Was even betterer when owned and operated by the stoner Germans. MB’s also super-gorgeous. A+

Tully, on the other hand is…well…is Little-Ipswich’O’The’North too strong? Sorry, Tully. I’m sorry you’ve copped a pizzling. But you really could pull your socks up. C-

3 02 2011
Discount Wetware!

I concur.
Tully was a bit of a bloodbath back in my day and apparently had been for quite some time. I worked in Tully’s only “nightclub”, attached to a backpackers corral. Thurs. Fri. Sat. all the locals and most of the backpackers (cashed up from a week in the banana paddocks) would get well charged at the Top Pub and roll down to ours at the pub close for a full noise R&B nightmare followed by some impromptu boxing and a leisurely stroll home up Butler Street to break some windows on the way home.
Mon. everyone went back to work and we would do the banking and wait for licensing to call. followed by the chamber of commerce and the cops. absurd. week in, week out. I would have closed the place to the locals and entertained in house guests only. If it cut the take it would have still improved the margin. It might have given the locals a lesson in civil decency too.
mission/wongaling/bingil was beautiful. just on the edge of total touristic despoil, some awesome secret beaches and views, phosphorescent night swimming, the skydiving boys used to put on the odd bush doof. For mine but the real gem is the Tully River. We used to get drunk and li-lo white water sections after the tourists had been down. The river would be pumping now.

3 02 2011
Pandabater

i think you can start to relax Queenslanders.
Due to the cessation of news worthy destruction
the cyclone is predicted to be downgraded from
Karl Stefanovic to Steve Jacobs Friday morning &
to Jaynie Seal (insert local weather girl) by
Friday evening.

3 02 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms, Constant source of Randomness

I noted that last night after the cricket it was already down to a Peter Overton. Karl was not staying out of the Sheratons bar that late for a piddly cyclone.

3 02 2011
Pandabater

All the QLDers have to do is stay away from home long enough to miss The Powderfinger.

3 02 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms, Constant source of Randomness

Yeah, they will need to do a second reunion concert now. F*ck you mother nature.

3 02 2011
hel

Real bogans don’t get foxtel, they just buy dodgy DVD copies of their favourite shows in Bali.

3 02 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms, Constant source of Randomness

Stocked up hey Hel! Do they stock Chilean or Gerbil porn yet?

4 02 2011
hel

Damn straight Simon! Alas no Chilean Porn, there is still a gaping hole in that market we are ripe to fill………

5 02 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms, Constant source of Randomness

My head almost exploded from the potential dodgy replies to you Hel. Welcome back.

4 02 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms, Constant source of Randomness

The Stefanovic Update

This morning he stood in the centre of Tully and boldly declared

“I can see 360 degree destruction, in every direction”

He also noted a broken ATM machine.

4 02 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms, Constant source of Randomness

I am just awaiting his use of the famous Hiroshima comparison. It can’t be far away now.

4 02 2011
hel

I heard one survivor say it was exactly like a nuclear bomb had been dropped. “Aside from the radioactive environment” was my first thought. Then I was just impressed that someone, from a place so bogan that even the hills have tattoos, was able to get it together enough to strategically survive a nuclear blast, as their statement had implied. Or are bogans like roaches and they too will survive a nuclear attack? Then I realised I was just a bitch.

4 02 2011
Pandabater

There has been a surprising absence
of “surreal” this week, what is this
weeks most badly used word?

4 02 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms, Constant source of Randomness

Survivours child called Mace. What?

4 02 2011
hel

we must add that to the list

4 02 2011
daniel green

GIVE US MORE TBL POSTS OR I AM GOING TO FUCKING GLASS SOMEBODY – 1 ALL WEEK? WTF OMG ROFL

4 02 2011
p'bee

come on tbl, i need something new. you’re not going to make me have to do some actual work today, are you?

4 02 2011
martin

Maybe they’ve got, you know, jobs. Not very libtard to be doing real work and having no time to post.

4 02 2011
Germane Riposte

what the hell?
Has anyone seen Hunter, Enron, Michael, Flash, Intravenus or E. ?
I’m starting to worry.
it’s not like I can write my own social satire..

I’m just a critic

fellas?..

4 02 2011
Germane Riposte

don’t seem to be able to get through to southern far north queensland either…

is it possible there’s a connection? TBL using their vast royalties to bring succour to the stricken? Fieldwork at loctions undisclosed? Called back to the bosom of Jehovah prior to the final judgement and destruction humanity? Just bagging off? There is tragedy afoot.
me hopes youse are above it.

4 02 2011
GoldCoaster

The thing that amuses me about Foxtel is that bogans will cry poor about how they can’t afford this or that for their medication or kids or other necessities, but they can always afford the $90 a month for their Foxtel. Anyone else met bogans like that? Sorry if this has already been posted. I’ve been off getting married and all that.

4 02 2011
AlyssaKT

I worked at a small “Foodstore” mini market in Currumbin when I was in highschool. A regular customer was a small gravelly-voiced woman and her 4 shoeless, grubby-faced children. She would ask for “Peter Jackson 30s red pack with white writing” and every time I would tell her what the actual name was (Super Mild or the like) but she never cared enough to learn the name.
The children would request typical things like lollies, but also bananas and apples from time to time. They were always told no – “I’ve got no fucking money! I told youse no!”
No money for shoes or washcloths or food for her kids – but always money for smokes…

4 02 2011
barkeep @ ye olde glassing barn

Similar story. I had a mate who worked at a service station, he regailed me with one story about how a customer had to make the decision between toilet paper and Winne Blues. Needless to say the decision is quite obvious in the eyes of the bogan.
I like the fact they also have no money but shop at a service station for the goods with a massive mark up for convenience.

4 02 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms, Constant source of Randomness

Congrats Goldy. Your point has been addressed, ditto smokes, booze V8 chevadores.

4 02 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms, Constant source of Randomness

I have now formulated a theory that TBL is also the board of St Kilda football club and they are presently hunkered down in their bunker trying to work out what to do after captain Reiwoldt make a prize clown of himself yesterday. Again

For those of you not footy orientated a quick summary.

St Kilda is a bogan football club with bogan players and feral supporters who have won 1 premiership in 100 years. For the last year or two their players have variously been involved in rape allegations, fathering sprogs with 16 year old girls, taking photos or each others todgers and getting drunk and high on sleeping pills at the same time. There is also talk of public urination.

So to counter this their captain came out yesterday and attacked the media and public in general for painting his fellow players in a bad light and trying to drag them down when they are all really good people. F*cking tool, no taking responsability, no apologies, no lift your socks up boys just more sulking and zero leadership from this arrogant deluded tosser.

Friday Bogan King.

4 02 2011
TheBattlersPrince

In summary, instead of being a professional football club, St Kilda is just a local footy club playing in a professional competition.

1 premiership in 138 years of competition? Check.

Meathead Aryan captain? Check.

Feral supporter base? Check.

Questionable misogynistic conduct on AND off the field? Check.

I rest my case people…

4 02 2011
barkeep @ ye olde glassing barn

“But they did nothing wrong, it’s all just the media beat up” (said while crying)

[sarcasm]Gee you would think they showed little respect for the female population by buying the girl out in the end, after denying there was a problem. They gave her money for her silence a simple transaction nothing wrong with that[/sarcasm]

4 02 2011
AlyssaKT

In further news, there is a video soon to be released of one of the high-ranking players enjoying fellatio from an up-and-coming (no pun intended) player. Unless the club can afford to stop its release…

4 02 2011
XXX

Really???????? How the hell did anyone get hold of that?

4 02 2011
Dgusten

In defence of my beloved St Kilda and St Nick, I think you’ve taken him a fair bit out of context there Simon. I know you’re not a bogan, but that’s something that the trash media and their bogan follewers like to do all too often.
Riewoldts comments were made at the AGM of the Club. He/they didn’t convene a press conference to announce this stuff to the world, he was talking to the supporters and players and told them what they want to hear – that it is a good club, that they’re staying focused, etc. Entirely appropriate things to be saying IMHO in the context of where he was speaking.
And i think he’s right about people trying to bring them down – the trash media and non St Kilda supporters are completely schadenfreude-ing in every little thing St Kilda does right now. Sometimes that’s been deserved, but a lot of it has not – how is the nude photo of Riewoldt in any way the public’s business, and how is it not a massive invasion of a privacy?
An analogy can be drawn to how every 5 minute delay in a Qantas flight gets reported on by the trash media at the moment, as if it means a plane’s going to drop out of the sky sometime soon…

4 02 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms, Constant source of Randomness

Fancy using West Coast as an example but I’m sure you get my drift. You don’t want to end up in the mess we got into!

4 02 2011
Dgusten

The Eagles were lucky enough to win a flag despite (or because of) Cousins. If we can do the same, I don’t care if we fall as spectacularly as you guys did in the years that followed…

So far, I haven’t seen anything too bad from St Kilda. I may be looking at it through rose tinted glasses, but Lovett wasn’t really part of the team and its pretty unfair to lump his behaviour in with us. Some guys shagged a girl who was young but legal (not very nice, but let’s face it, it happens all the time – the big mistake here was that she was apparently an unstable and narcissistic psycho), some guys took some silly photos and unfortunately the aforementioned unstable and narcissistic psycho got a hold of them, and a few younger players got drunk with some sleeping tablets in NZ or something like that.

Not yet hanging out with underworld figures or getting “Such is Life” wasatefully tattooed across their perfect abs, but I guess there’s always room to devolve…

4 02 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms, Constant source of Randomness

Wasn’t Milne in trouble for trying to pork someone who wasn’t keen?

Anyway you got my point dude and I would not trade our cup!

5 02 2011
Danny

I propose a headline for the back page of The Herald Scum: “Nick dick pic chick gets flick”.

4 02 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms, Constant source of Randomness

Dgusten,

I hear you but I think it was time he stood up and didn’t tell them what they want to hear but showed some honesty and leadership. As a West Coast supporter I have seen this and until some people were sacked, traded etc it was not going to be fixed. Importantly the club leadership and board apologised for the problems and vowed to do something about it. It took too long but it did happen and I see St Kilda going the same way, head in sand, no ownership etc.

4 02 2011
Germane Riposte

I’m just stoked the heat is off the NRL for a change.
(it won’t last)

4 02 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms, Constant source of Randomness

It won’t be long before one of them poo’s in public.

4 02 2011
p'bee

actually, i foresee a pooing in public competition from one of the clubs.

4 02 2011
James Hunter

shit of an idea

4 02 2011
Steponie Ragrem

Trials are underway
Games are about to be played
Who will start or stop

4 02 2011
Steponie Regram

Trials are underway
The games are starting as well
Who will start or stop

6 02 2011
jed

what if I have the basic package, watch al jazeera and am still bothered that they removed cnbc?

7 02 2011
afr

To the bogan, if you watch al jazeera, you must be a terrorist.

7 02 2011
Mick

Nah, the bogue thinks Al Jazeera plays for some wogball team.

7 02 2011
The Bogan from 'Berra

Pretty much the maxxtremity of maxxtreme home entertainment right here. http://www.domain.com.au/ore/Public/Gallery/Photo.aspx?adid=2008721182&pic=1&st=1

7 02 2011
The Bogan from 'Berra

Sorry, it’s pic 11.

14 02 2011
Linda

Foxtel – I could not think of anything that would be more of a waste of money. ick!

Just think – the amount of hours you would have to sit on your ass to watch programs to make up the $69 a month or whatever it is.

blergh.. this is the beginning of the “muffin top” boganista

20 09 2011
weallgotsomeboganinus.

Too simplistic. Both bogans and non-bogans love foxy. It’s just that the ‘bogans’ may more readily admit to it. Or at least admit to watching some of the less cerebral programming on offer. My bet is foxtel’s presence is highest in sydney’s glorious eastern suburbs …. and its sensible north shore.

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