The bogan hates tax. It will go to remarkable lengths to concoct a system of cash jobs, shifty accountants, and bald-faced lies in order to minimise the amount of money that it contributes to sustain the nation of which it is so proud. However, when political correctness goes mad, the nanny state will often catch the bogan out and make it pay something approximating a fair amount of tax. After briefly considering getting Slater & Gordon to take their case to the Maxtreme Court, the bogan realises that cooperating with the intellectual at the Australian Taxation Office is not as horrifying as initially thought.
Now that the bogan has paid some tax, it is entitled to demand (via its trusted news sources) that the entire Federal budget is dedicated solely to supporting and magnifying its boganity. The bogan is not racist, but a government plan to spend millions of the bogan’s taxpayer dollars on getting Aboriginal life expectancy to within 10 years of the rest of Australia is unacceptable to the non-aboriginal bogan. This stance is confirmed later that night, when the bogan sees a cheerful Ernie Dingo in perfect health on its plasma screen. At this point, the bogan will announce to the others in the room that the government does indeed need to be sacked.
But it’s not just that bogans want the federal budget to be entirely geared towards bogans, each bogan wants the budget to be all about its own agenda for the coming months. This can range from demands to inexplicably double the baby bonus (despite its bumper sticker vowing that Australia is full), crank up the first homeowner’s grant to exacerbate an asset bubble, or reward a moronic facebook group that wants another one-off $900 just because. They’re the bogan’s taxpayer dollars, dammit, and the bogan wants them returned to its bank account in exponential quantities.
While the bogan has no concept of the administrative and other costs of running a first world democracy, it has a intuitive sense of when it is being ripped off. The stamp duty on its McMansion is absurdly high, and it’s definitely not related to the enormous infrastructure expense of yet another sprawling and inefficient housing estate on the urban fringe, subsidised by non-bogans. The bogan’s taxpayer dollars demand a train station, a free school, and Krispy Kreme within a 3 minute drive of wherever it chooses to construct its 40 square glass cube. And the first homeowner’s grant should be extended to all homeowners to instantly make homes cheaper. And now that there’s no remaining agricultural land within 70km of a capital city, food is too expensive. The bogan’s taxpayer dollars require that the government “does something” that allows the bogan to continue existing entirely separate from the consequences of its actions.