Friday Poll – Australia Day

21 01 2011

Before we make with the voting, let’s take a quick look at our preferred elements of the trashmedia’s flood coverage. With nearly 2,000 votes, there were two clear frontrunners: the frog-riding snake and the inability of commentators to stop using their newest word, ‘inundated’, which scored 22% and 20% respectively.

We will now be inundated with patriotic pabulum. With the floods receding, and the trashmedia able to start reverting to its standard January nationalism, the bogan can now focus on its Overseas Day celebrations. There are many possible eventualities from Australia Day. Which do you think is most likely?

 


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198 responses

21 01 2011
Gorey

It was a snake-riding frog. Please ensure you get such trivia correct.

21 01 2011
Pandabater

My Chinese made Australian flag went up in my window this week. Oi Oi Oi.

21 01 2011
v'visexxx!on

Another new bogue trend for Aust. day is changing the profile picture on facebook to a map of Australia / Southern Cross and wearing swimsuits made with Australian flag designs.

21 01 2011
Gorey

That’s not a new trend. I know a bogue who changed his profile pic to an Australian-flag coloured icon of Australia to support the flood victims, because you know, he’d read a report about floods in Brazil and Sri Lanka and it upset him that someone thought that this could somehow be newsworthy when, like, Australia is being flooded.

21 01 2011
Will S

If someone could photoshop the ‘1’ to a ‘3’, one could use this as a profile picture to mess with people:

25 01 2011
bobr

Brilliant.
I`m sticking this to the back of my car.
Good thing i`ve got a fast car though or i could get my eye sockets inundated with blood,courtesy of Chevrolet drivers.

21 01 2011
Legless on Thalidomide

Let’s not forget the annual pilgrimage to Rooty Hill where the bogans arrive en masse with Jim Beam in hand and draped in the Australian flag ready to listen to hours of classics by Australian pub rock bands of yesteryear.

21 01 2011
The Bogan from 'Berra

Yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeew. Rooty hill here i come. I’ll be holding a rumbo though, bourbon is for girls. Ozzy Ozzy Ozzy.

21 01 2011
DuxLux

Can’t wait for this day of stupidity to erupt. I wanted to tick all the above.

PS Thanks to the idiot(s) who trashed my car 2 years ago, while I was volunteering. Cleaning up peoples puke, dealing with violence and trashed morons all night was a real hoot. Looking forward to it (and the increased Police presence) once again. Oi,Oi,Oi!

21 01 2011
p'bee

i want to vote for all options.

21 01 2011
Will S

Where is all of the above?

21 01 2011
Mumfy27

I had a bad dream last night….Cee lo Green’s- F%ck You was number one in the hottest 100 due to the Bogans love of the f word followed at number 2 by We Dont Speak Americaino- Yolanda Be Cool and D cup . I woke up in a cold sweat

21 01 2011
p'bee

those two will definitely be top five.

21 01 2011
chubbybloodfart

I don’t think it was a dream.
file under “prescience”.

I’d like to ask what TBLers would have voted for but tripleJ is officially thoroughly bogan. I’m beginning to suspect Guetta fans have more integrity than the tripleJ footprint.
(“You Wanted a Hit” by LCD Sounsystem, “Groove Me” – Maximum Balloon & “Jellylegs” – Children Collide get my vote, but I didn’t look at the full list)
Nonetheless I will prolly still listen in on the day. This may have been the worst year in history for music.

21 01 2011
p'bee

i voted, but can’t remember much of what i voted for, and i know that at least half of my votes had no chance because they were never among the 12 songs a week triple j now play.
the only reason i still have triple j on my alarm in the morning is i can get their half hourly news and weather updates. if i just want music, i listen to fbi (that probably outs me as hipster now).

21 01 2011
chubbybloodfart

wow.
fbi. never heard of it. I checked the web site and recognised nothing except British Sea Power. Which could be a good or a bad thing.
like being a hipster.

we need a new word for hip people who aren’t scenester daytrippers…

21 01 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms

Us?

21 01 2011
chubbybloodfart

not me!
I’m a bloody Dag!
that’s why I’m so cool.

see, it’s ironic.

21 01 2011
Ben

I gave up on JJJ 6 months after tuning into it for the first time in July 2008. I’m an FBi and 2SER convert. I support community radio all the way.

21 01 2011
The Bogan from 'Berra

Here’s some of the odds. You can see the full list at centrebet.com

CEE LO GREEN – F YOU! 2.45
ANGUS AND JULIA STONE – BIG JET PLANE 3.20
BIRDS OF TOKYO – PLANS 5.00
LITTLE RED – ROCK IT 10.00
ADRIAN LUX – TEENAGE CRIME 11.00
DUCK SAUCE – BARBARA STREISAND 12.00
OU EST LE SWIMMING POOL – DANCE THE WAY I FEEL 12.00
JOHN BUTLER TRIO – REVOLUTION 15.00
THE WOMBATS – TOKYO (VAMPIRES AND WOLVES) 15.00
WASHINGTON – SUNDAY BEST 15.00
ART VS. SCIENCE – MAGIC FOUNTAIN 21.00
DRAPHT – RAPUNZEL 21.00
TAME IMPALA – SOLITUDE IS BLISS 21.00
YOLANDA BE COOL AND D CUP – WE NO SPEAK AMERICANO 21.00

21 01 2011
chubbybloodfart

360 should get an honorary mention just for wanting to trash Lllllleyton…
however misguided.

21 01 2011
21 01 2011
Pandabater

F^ck. I am officially OLD.
4 out of 10.
Never heard of the rest.

*searches internet for Slim Dusty CD’s*

22 01 2011
Lucky Star

Anything but that Barbara Streisand song should win. Most retarded song ever!!

24 01 2011
Frazer

Or that song Shots, Hideous.

21 01 2011
urbanreverie

Thanks for reminding me about Australia Day, TBL. I was hoping that I would be able to get through 2011 without noticing it. No such luck.

I had the great misfortune to be in Sydney on Australia Day in 2009. I caught the train in from my relatives’ place in the outer western suburbs. At Westmead, an Asian family boarded the train, all the children holding little flags, and I struck up a conversation with them. They had moved to Australia some fifteen years previously, and were all proud citizens, and grateful for the opportunities this country has provided, and spoke of how optimistic they were for their childrens’ future because they were getting a decent education. The kids were so looking forward to seeing the ferries and the fireworks.

Fast forward a few hours, about 6pm. I was waiting for a train at Central Station back to where I was staying, but the trains were delayed. There was a train which had just come from the North Shore Line parked on the platform waiting for police to arrive because there were drunken bogans on board who refused to leave the train when directed by transit officers. On the platform itself was a marauding horde of caped crusaders, all sunburnt, guzzling cans of Woodstock pre-mixes, occasionally shouting that vile moronic “Aussie Aussie Aussie! Oi oi oi!” chant. One sunburnt bogan came up to me, stuck his face about three inches from mine, and shouted “AUSSIE!!!!” in my face. Some flecks of spit landed on me, I could smell the bourbon-stained stench of his putrid breath. I am Anglo-Saxon and don’t look foreign at all. God knows what he would have done if I were dark-skinned.

I really had to restrain myself from going “Nur nurny nur nur! Suck sh!t!” when the cops arrived and arrested the bogans who refused to leave the train!

Mind you, Australia Day in Brisbane isn’t quite so disturbing. There were more than a few flag capes last year, but I saw only one “Australia – Love It Or Leave It” t-shirt. Probably because the Queensland media have no hate-peddlers to stir up xenophobia and hatred.

Anyway, the family from Westmead were cool. Their story of hard work, gratitude, tolerance and opportunity is precisely what Australia Day should be all about. Unfortunately the bogans have ruined the day beyond redemption. 😦

21 01 2011
Pellicle

American wrapped in the flag patriotic shit seems to have taken up here in Australia. I gotta say back as recently as 10 years ago this was rare.

Its bloody sad to see

21 01 2011
Pandabater

10 years ago people had respect for the flag.
Now it is a giant sweat rag/napkin.
Aussie Aussie Aussie.

21 01 2011
urbanreverie

I blame John Howard. Eleven years of state-sponsored xenophobia, rhetoric which demonised minorities and “the other” (not necessarily ethnic minorities or asylum seekers, mind you – the mentally ill, the unemployed, gays and lesbians – if you weren’t a white-bread suburbanite bogan you were fair game), of mandating that all schools fly the flag whether the parents and teachers and students want it or not, of forcing prospective citizens to prove that they were a true-blue rool Strayan by asking them pointless questions about Don Bradman … surely eleven years of such a disgusting government has to have an effect on a country’s culture and how its people perceive themselves.

Throw into the mix a commercial media which actively promotes resentment and nationalism (yes, Today Tonight and certain News Ltd columnists and Sydney shock jocks, I’m looking at you!), and a highly capitalistic economy in which people are forced to see their fellow human beings as competitors rather than co-operators, and a new Labor government which doesn’t show even the slightest inclination to undo all the damage of eleven years of John Howard – and you have the perfect breeding ground for rampant jingoism and xenophobia.

The governments of Whitlam, Fraser, Hawke and Keating weren’t perfect. Far from it. But at least they generally respected the rights of minorities and for people to be different, and they were careful not to encourage the unhealthy sort of nationalism you see today; a nationalism which excludes rather than includes.

Paul Keating was right when he said “you change the government, you change the country.” I’m not convinced, however, that we really did change the government in 2007. 😦

21 01 2011
The Bogan from 'Berra

What’s wrong with making schools fly the flag?

21 01 2011
urbanreverie

Apart from the fact that 25% of the flag consists of the flag of a foreign nation, a symbol of quite a nasty and racist empire that subjugated one quarter of the Earth’s land surface at the point of a bayonet and dispossessed this country’s original inhabitants, and should be updated to a design that’s more relevant to who we are today, mandatory patriotism really isn’t a good idea. Especially when the local school community doesn’t particularly want it.

We force our kids to idolise the flag at school, and lead them to see it as a symbol of being a rool Strayan – then wonder why they wear it as a cape while beating up foreigners on our beaches?

21 01 2011
SD

Coincidentally India became a republic on 26 January. There is still some respect attached to the flag and our schools fly it on this day. Inspite of the cynicism, I think people still feel a bit uplifted and thoughtful about our long journey. So in context and recognising the symbolism of a flag, its not necessarily bad to give it respect.

Perhaps Australia Day should more correctly be 1 January because it is a day of emancipation and the start of a new nation. Also recognising that Australia is multicultural, it still stands that a large percentage of the population has British heritage and something of the philosophy of this nation is still British (not necssarily a bad thing at all). Evil empire or not, there is nothing in recognising common roots and a sense of history. I honestly do not see a problem with the flag – though I do think it should incorporate aboriginal elements.

And yes flags should not be beach towels.

21 01 2011
Will S

Nah mate, can’t be 1st of January, we’d be too hungover from New Years to get pissed again

21 01 2011
Bag O'Turnips

That’ll sort out the wheat from the chaff, as those who are decent Australians would not have got themselves so shickled the night before, mindful of the festivities of the following day.

Scratch that suggestion, on second thoughts…all the yobbos will use that as the perfect excuse as a hair-of-the-dog chaser to continue their revelry another day.

But I’m in full agreement with those who advocate that we celebrate Australia Day on 1 January, as it is on that date we became a fully-federated and independent nation. 26 January may be kept for people from New South Wales as their state day, for that was what it was known as when the First Fleet had proclaimed that territory. Doing that will not only mitigate some small degree of the rightful angst that many Indigenous Australians have towards that day (though it still may be considered an “Invasion Day” in reality), but also remove the antipathy of the rest of the states and territories towards the perceived NSW-centric nature of that occasion.

21 01 2011
Will S

It could be left as the 26th of January but then the 10th of August could be made an additional public holiday (perhaps at the expense of the Queen’s Birthday) in order to add recognition for Indigenous people.

21 01 2011
SD

I need caffeine. there is nothing *wrong* in recognising common roots and a sense of history

21 01 2011
Pellicle

sence of history and recognition of common roots is one thing, but failure to grasp that we are still very much holding onto mummies skirts and rampant (and undirected) nationalism is another.

Look carefully at our mother england and ask yourself what kind of caring mother would subject its children to stuff like:
– oh gosh we got the location wrong Gallipoli
– oh lets just test these new toys at Maralinga on the ozzie boys
– lets just do some nuclear fall out tests later in 56 and take bones of people just to see how we go with Strontium 90
– the fall of Singapore and “oh who gives a rats” about the Ozzies and Indian colonials who fell into Japanese torture camps
– the list goes on

today such a mother would be removed from her kids.

Why do you think the Americans had the war of Independence?

The legacy of outright fhkover and exploit the place left after colonialism in Australia is staggering.

I don’t mind we have the ancestry we have, but I’d like to be an independent country, put the union jack off the flag and stop asking the Queens permission for every entry to a port (yes, go look at your passport we still have “on behalf of the Queen on that document)

Are we a country or are we still a training wheel colony?

Why don’t we bother looking at other countries for policy and legal inspiration? Is it because we’re too bloody English trained to bother with Swedish, German, Danish, Finish or Spanish?

Norway rates as the best quality of life in the world .. England is not high on that list, nor the USA

hmmm

21 01 2011
SD

Pellicle, it was my understanding that the English are not the arch villians of Gallipolli as is made out.

I didn’t mean a post 1788 history as much as a shared heritage. The British influence on Australia cannot be completely wished away. Similarly inspite of an even more rancid history, the British infleunce on India and vice versa cannot be wished away.

I agree on the traning wheels and its about time the cord is cut re the Queen.

22 01 2011
pellicle

SD

I don’t propose we attempt to wish away our heritage, simply that we determine our future on where we wish to go, and not be mired in where we have come from.

Australia has the opportunity to be a new and great nation. Free from the centuries of baggage (such as class distinction, religious wars, caste system ..) which dog many other nations (England being one).

I’d love to see us give it a go. Certainly we’ve been trying and to some extent succeeding. But there are many who actively attempt to drag us back. I recommend reading this book:
Powell, J. M. (1976). Environmental Management in Australia,1788-1914: guardians, improvers and profit : an introductory survey.
it focuses on the period from Colonisation to Federation and is quite interesting reading.

21 01 2011
The Bogan from 'Berra

Guess there must be something wrong with me then. My school raised the flag at assembly every morning while we sang the national anthem. Maybe that’s why i chose to serve under our flag?

I may be a “jingoistic bogan”, but i see nothing wrong with instilling kids with a bit of patriotic spirit. It’s a pleasant change to see kids showing their pride in their country, rather than the indifference that they show towards everything else these days.

As for the history of the British empire……well, i don’t see any point in sitting around feeling sad and ashamed about things which happened centuries ago? Do you feel the same way about people from Persian, Greek or Italian backgrounds? They all shed a bit of blood here and there for their causes, annexed quite a bit of land in their time too.

21 01 2011
v'visexxx!on

I guess it all depends of how you interpret the experience you’ve had living under the flag. I see little value in making children raise a flag and swearing an oath of allegiance if the govt running the country is morally bankrupt, as the Howard and Gillard govts have been, as Urban pointed out. Perhaps if the govts of this country offered real leadership on issues and demonstrated compassion and humanity instead of populalist scaremongering and grubby vote grabbing, showing national pride would not be as embarrassing as it currently is.

21 01 2011
p'bee

every day? wow, we mumbled either the national anthem or school song at our weekly assemblies, but that’s it.
and i don’t think the question is really what’s wrong with a school flying the flag, rather what’s the reason for compelling them to do so? it’s a pretty tokenistic gesture, really.

26 01 2011
Swalk

^ This. While we’re on the subject, has anyone else noticed the steadily encroaching practice of putting one’s hand on their chest during the national anthem? As with so many other supposed acts of Australian patriotism, what this really reveals is the pervasiveness of American culture in this country. It is not a remotely Australian tradition and never has been.

21 01 2011
Mumfy27

There is a line though. Its almost taken on a American Stars and Stripes angle of bigger,better and if you don’t like it you can shove it. This has lead to the Bogan thinking bashing up another fellow man because he is different whilst wearing the flag as a cape is doing his bit for the nation We should not have our flag dragged though the mud of xenophobia because we all have stand under it.

21 01 2011
Mumfy27

just add * to in that last sentence…….jeze thought i was doing well

21 01 2011
TheBattlersPrince

People shouldn’t die for a flag, they should live for an idea…

21 01 2011
Pellicle

seems as good a reason as any to keep them going on then doesn’t it …

21 01 2011
Bag O'Turnips

There’s a fine line crossed from patriotism to jingoistic nationalism, and that is precisely what I don’t like about Straya Day nowadays.

We as Australians have been typically quite understated in our love of country, but all this over-the-top nationalist spectacle flies in the face of this humble and noble tradition.

We are now beginning to look like the rabid Americans we so despised.

21 01 2011
clipper

I tend to agree with SD re British heritage and philosophy, but wonder what percentage of the Bogan crowd would even know that it is the British flag in the corner?

21 01 2011
The Bogan from 'Berra

Given the amount of times it’s been waved under our noses at the cricket this summer, i’d say there’s a fair chance.

21 01 2011
Bag O'Turnips

The Barmy Army actually tend to fly the St George’s Cross, as if to distinguish themselves as from “Eng-ger-land”, rather than Scotland, Wales or Northern Ireland.

21 01 2011
Mumfy27

Cue Bogan Outrage at first sight of New Zealands Flag “farrrrrk those sheep rooting cawnts stole our flag”……i have heard this come from a bogans mouth. Told him he needs to get into stand up. Worst move ever, it started a torrent of sexist and racist jokes.

21 01 2011
urbanreverie

The NZ flag is older than the Australian flag by 32 years. I wouldn’t have said that to the bogan though, unless you particularly like spending time in the hospital with glassing wounds to your face. 😦

21 01 2011
Bag O'Turnips

Here’s the mighty Fauves, with “Celebrate The Failure”.

“Gonna gather underneath a big ol’ flag that looks like New Zealand’s dirty snotrag”…

22 01 2011
Mumfy27

wow cool……… that’s a trivia night question right there “Which flag is older? Australia or New Zealand” thanks for that. I am putting a trivia night together at the moment for the local Bowls Club……

21 01 2011
v'visexxx!on

I agree too, and think that the fact a lot of us are uncomfortable with the Union Jack aspect is because it took so long for our govts to acknowledge the damage done / near genocide committed by colonial Australia. The fact that we had successive govts going out of their way to avoid acknowledging and apologising kind of adds to the negativity of the experience. Since the Rudd govt finally did the deed, we can feel less ashamed. As soon as someone does something about addressing the health, housing and social inequality still left largely unaddressed, we can be really be proud of the flag, with the union jack or not.

21 01 2011
The Bogan from 'Berra

Nobody apologised for anything on my behalf. I wasn’t here in 1788, what happened then was none of my business.

21 01 2011
SD

With that you crossed the fine line from being patriotic to jingoistic, head in the sand bogan,

21 01 2011
urbanreverie

Hi SD,

You are right, there is a line between patriotism and jingoism. I probably should have made the distinction myself earlier.

There’s nothing wrong with being moderately proud of your country. Many countries celebrate their national day in a way which doesn’t degenerate into a massive jingoistic wankathon like Australia Day has become here.

Take Norway. Every Constitution Day on May 17, Norwegians (including those on my campus) go totally apesh!t – flags, parades, anthems, in which pretty much the entire community takes part. Then again, they have a lot to be proud of – the highest standard of living in the world with the planet’s best welfare state. And I am certain that they don’t spit “NORSKIE!!!” with akvavit-laden breath in the face of strangers who are standing on the platform at Oslo S railway station.

And take the Canadians. They love celebrating Canada Day on July 1 with community festivities and ceremonies. But Canadians have a nationalism which includes, rather than excludes, minorities. Tolerance, compassion and multiculturalism (including the famous “fruitcake”, in which all the individual ingredients retain their own flavours while contributing to a very tasty whole) are core values of Canadian nationalism. I can’t imagine gangs of Canadian youths rioting on the shores of Lake Ontario with their bare torsos crudely daubed with slogans such as “WE GREW HERE, YOU FLEW HERE – EH?”

And yes, I’m moderately patriotic about some things. There are things about Australia, my native land, which I am proud of – stunning natural scenery, the ABC (a genuinely world-class broadcaster), a stable liberal democracy, a relatively high level of human freedom. And as someone who just spent a few days volunteering with the recent Queensland floods, the way this country pulls together in a crisis is admirable.

But there’s a lot I’m ashamed about.

I’ll be prouder when we eliminate poverty from this land, when everyone has the opportunity to achieve prosperity and social injustice is abolished. I’ll be prouder when the benefits of our natural resources, which we all own, are more equally shared in our community. I’ll be prouder when we arrive at a just and satisfactory settlement with our Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander brothers and sisters, who have suffered gravely the past two centuries, and they no longer live in Third World conditions.

I’ll be prouder when xenophobia and other aspects of boganity no longer wield such an unwelcome influence on life in Australia. I’ll be prouder when we start planning our cities right. And I’ll definitely beam with pride when we stop thinking in terms of “me” and start thinking in terms of “we”.

That’s my two cents.

21 01 2011
Tony D

urbanreverie, I think I love you. Great posts.

21 01 2011
Pandabater

Hang on to your money Urban,
your words are worth much more.

21 01 2011
Davo

I want to see uni students added to the TBL list. They try to hard to maintain the whole “angry at everything government, military, history and USA” attitude. Some even get maxxtreme by joining a socialist group. Most grow out of it when they start working. But some go on to join Labour.

21 01 2011
@ the Ye Olde Glassing Barn

I find it interesting about Norway. People have a view that it is pristine and advanced living conditions. Norway has a lot of drug related problems. I went there with a view that it would be beautiful and was shocked by the homeless, prostitutes (street crawlers that entail) and obviously drug affected individuals. I toured all of Scandinavia (Sweden, Norway, Denmark, and Iceland all except Finland, which I later went back and toured) I had heard that Norway has high living standards in line with the rest of Scandanavia. It has one of the best (if not the) GDP. We had been in Sweden, Denmark & Iceland prior to Norway and could not believe the difference. In the prior countries we could not remember seeing a police car or police for that matter. In Norway they were everywhere. Norway is also home to the largest chapter of the “Hells Angels” which surprises people. Their customised utes and bikes could be seen lining Karl Johans Gata as the sun went down. Everything was ridiculously expensive, and for Scandinavia that is saying something.
So I personally find it interesting when the UN announce that it has the highest standard of living. As what I saw actually reminded me of Perth. Obviously a lot of wealthy people because of mining natural resources (Oil & Gas), but a lot being left behind.
Just how I saw it.
Article below rang pretty true to me when I read it.

PS: My wife is Swedish and she jokes that the closest things Scandinavia has to bogans are Norwegians. They tend to be the more ute orientated and doing laps to be “seen”. Sound familiar?

http://www.nytimes.com/2002/08/08/world/in-scenic-norway-a-death-scene-of-addiction.html

22 01 2011
urbanreverie

Hi Ye Olde Glassing Barn,

Thanks for your comments about Norway. My views on Norway and their national day were garnished from a Swedish friend of mine (who told me that Swedes barely celebrate their own national day but the Norwegians “go berserk” but denied that they acted in the same obnoxious and intolerant way our rednecks do), observing the celebrations on my campus (lots of good-natured flag-waving students marching down the main drive and cheering and singing “Ja, Vi Elsker Dette Landet”), the United Nations Human Development Report, a few YouTube clips and various other sundries. I’m happy to defer my judgement to somebody who’s actually been there though 🙂 I will admit I’ve never been there, nor do I have a partner who is Scandinavian and can fill me in on local culture.

Still, I sense in the quotes from the Norwegian officials in that New York Times article an attitude that is far more empathetic and humane towards people stupid or sick enough to fall into the trap of addiction than anything you’ll find from our bottom-of-the-barrel, scaremongering politicians.

Also, a link you and your wife might like – a webcomic that tries to explain the different Scandinavian countries and their attitudes towards one another 🙂

http://satwcomic.com

21 01 2011
The Bogan from 'Berra

Of course i did.

21 01 2011
SD

Urban I think Australia is a better place for having people like you.

The thing I like most about Australia is how quickly any discussion becomes an occasion for quips, preferably bawdy. Being a serious sort I found it odd at first but its possibly the best way to deal with stuff 🙂

21 01 2011
chubbybloodfart

Bravo V’v

21 01 2011
James Hunter

Viv,
I think the flag is representative of a broadbrush concept of country and is not ment to be , nor should it be taken as a changing symbol of what may be right or wrong about the country at any particular time

21 01 2011
v'visexxx!on

James H, that may be, but when a flag is used for the purposes of extreme or jingoistic nationalism, it becomes a symbol of what is right or wrong with a country. Like it or not. Flags are often hijacked by people with an agenda.

21 01 2011
Bag O'Turnips

All the better a reason for changing to a flag that represents a holistic vision for this country.

The sky didn’t fall out of Canada when they adopted the maple leaf…if anything, it has enhanced their identity in the wider world.

Time we did something similar.

21 01 2011
Blueballs

Maybe so, but did they go Republican???

22 01 2011
Bag O'Turnips

No, Canada is still a constitutional monarchy and part of the Commonwealth, much to the mirth of their friends south of the 49th Parallel.

There doesn’t seem to be a huge republican push there right now, though the Québécois would be only too happy to see the back of QEII and her successors.

As for me, roll on republic!

22 01 2011
Tombarina

V’v, I’m torn on this one.

The UJ represents the foundation of nationhood. I don’t regard it as 25% of another country on Aust’s patch – or perhaps I’ve chosen to see it as an historical representation rather than a tug’o’th’forelock to the Awd Country.

I regard the Southern Cross as representative of ALL Australians – indigenous and immigrant (ie, the rest of us) – irrespective of whether you can trace your roots back seven generations, or you arrived here last Tuesday.

What DOES shit me is when ignorant cocks use it as some sort of self-righteous shield for their pathetic, ill-informed simplistic jingoism. It’s as though they feel entitled to spew whatever hateful crap is fermenting between their cauliflower ears, and it’s OK because they’re wearing a flag! As a cape! At BDO! Yay for them….

22 01 2011
Ash -Glasser of C*nts, Kicker of Hipsters and Massive Can Connossieur

Tomba, you said it.

I want to see the Union Jack off the Australian flag, because I feel it doesn’t represent me or any other Australians of non-Anglo Saxon background, particularly those of us who were oppressed by the British. I would much rather see it replaced by the Eureka Flag – now there’s a symbol of “Australian values” – only the fuckwit, capitalist pig NAB has stolen it as a symbol of it’s own narrow-minded racism.

21 01 2011
Davo

England was soo bad. The way they outlawed slavery was just wrong. They should never have stopped Napoleon, he was the good guy. And settling Australia, they should have left it for the Portugese or the French. At least they treated natives well.

21 01 2011
urbanreverie

TBL #479: The black armband view of history gone mad! (a nice follow-on from #39)

TBL #528: Bagging uni students (this will tie in quite nicely with #97, which while a great article didn’t mention students or why they are so despised by many bogans)

21 01 2011
Blueballs

Well, we were founded by that 25% in the corner, so fair enough. We could change it, but I fear that all the proposed options would either offend our collective anti intellectualism or be accompanied by official a pontificating PR team justifying the merits of said design. They could go a single colour ala Libya, but that would be insulting to budding flag designers out there, resulting an overdone something that would look like a pride flag that’s been used to mop up kangaroo jizz. As a result, I reckon it would be prudent to just leave it as it is

22 01 2011
brad

boring

21 01 2011
Mumfy27

“highly capitalistic economy in which people are forced to see their fellow human beings as competitors rather than co-operators”

Well said urbanreverie

21 01 2011
chubbybloodfart

bravo

21 01 2011
chubbybloodfart

sorry.
just one little error there…
Gough actually was perfect.
In fact, He still is.

21 01 2011
Bag O'Turnips

He’s the longest-lived former Prime Minister: 94 not out, and still pretty active at that.

No one will ever quell his rage, nor will they excel him in level of beneficial impact, despite his Government’s gaffes, which is all the more remarkable given that he was in power for just under three years (I happened to also be a Whitlam-era baby myself). Gough had dragged Australia from the extended somnambulism of the 1950s, kicking-and-screaming straight into the 1970s, though Harold Holt and John Gorton before him did clear some part of the way for him to do this.

Although widely despised while he was PM (and for the dirty circumstances that led to his accession), Malcolm Fraser’s estimation has vastly improved over the years, especially in the context of his enlightened social views…I have just heard that he had secretly given funding to a women’s refuge, back in his era, in Queensland, as Joh Belkje-Petersen was very hostile towards doing this. Bravo, Mal! And as a testament to the fundamental decency of these two leaders, they both are on good terms with each other nowadays, due to their shared sense of humanity.

29 01 2011
Shazza

Thanks Urban. Well said. *clicks on imaginary “like” link*

21 01 2011
barkeep @ ye olde glassing barn

I noticed this as well. Funny enough I think it was 2002, obviously after Sept 11 everyone got really patriotic.
The mini flags on cars and the temp tattoos you could get from the newspaper started popping up everywhere.
I remembered at the time the 3-4years earlier no one idolised the flag and we had a referendum to to change it. It was voted down by a majority but it was not displayed as parochially (Compare to the Boxing Kangaroo) as it is now.

21 01 2011
Le-a

Don’t forget the token actions of the Bogan who will in a drunken stupor, along with his mates, attempt to solve ALL the problems faced by Ostrayans these days, including but not limited to:

The fact that there’s just too many ‘Gooks’ and ‘Wogs’ in this country and CLEARLY not enough room!

The Japanese whaling program

The fact that THERE’S A BLOODY WOMAN IN CHARGE!

The price of Bin Tang singlets at City Beach compared to Kuta Beach

The fact that beer stubbies don’t contain as much ‘piss’ as they used to, it’s a conspiracy from the beer companies I tell you!!!

21 01 2011
p'bee

you forgot to mention that the woman in charge is a ranga. hair colour is apparently enough to make one unqualified for leadership.

21 01 2011
The Bogan from 'Berra

She has MASSIVE earlobes too.

21 01 2011
p'bee

can’t say i’ve ever noticed her earlobes.

21 01 2011
The Bogan from 'Berra

It was on the 7PM report during the election. Google it. MASSIVE.

21 01 2011
TheBattlersPrince

7PM Report? Sounds like a bastardisation of the peak and trough of the journalistic landscape…

21 01 2011
The Bogan from 'Berra

Yeah, sorry, 7PM show. My wife blasts me when i call it a “report”.

21 01 2011
The Bogan from 'Berra

Have you tried the new Gillard value meal from KFC? It comes with 2 big thighs, 2 small breasts in a big red box.

21 01 2011
SD

ewww. sexist.

21 01 2011
Nelson Esq

and a left wing…

21 01 2011
The Bogan from 'Berra

That’s a bit too highbrow.

21 01 2011
Bag O'Turnips

I though it contained two left wings. That would’ve been a product of genetic engineering and to be sold by the ABC, as spruiked by Slammin’ Sam Kekovich, when he was on Aunty’sThe Fat. When he was actually funny.

I used to enjoy Slammin’ Sam’s monotone sprays on that show, as there was a lot of tongue-in-cheek irony on one level, whilst still appealing superficially to the unreconstructed views of sporto idiots who also tuned in.

Now he has well-and-truly sold out, like he threatened to do. Those lamb ads he’s been doing the last few years were at first quite amusing, but now have descended into a caricature, especially now that he does his annual national lamb roadshow for Meat & Livestock Australia.

Makes me cringe now, especially given my vegetarianism…these spots do nothing to enlighten the wider population to the benefits of going veg and the harms of excessive red meat consumption (after all, Slammin’ Sam reckons we should eat it for breakfast, lunch and tea on Straya Day) and gives added ammunition to those dimwits who got the wrong end of the stick with his humour a decade ago, taunting those who choose not to partake in consuming meat and questioning our sexuality or patriotism for that.

You used to be cool, Sam. Now you’re a Class-A bellend. You know it makes sense. I’m Bag O’Turnips.

21 01 2011
Dom

I feel the same way about another Sam- Sam Neill. With him hocking, nay, pushing red meat at us, I feel so disappointed. We were mean’t to eat it? Sorry, I guess I’m doing something wrong then. I’m not a proper human. Oh well.
Event Horizon=excellent.
Red Meat adds=off the artistic roll-call forever.

24 01 2011
Spoonman

Bill Hicks reference noted…

21 01 2011
chubbybloodfart

have you seen Julia Gillard in “Burn After Reading”?
She looks a bit like Tilda Swanson.
uncanny

21 01 2011
chubbybloodfart

add me to the “all of the above” folks.

21 01 2011
Loftie

And Me…

All of the above…

And perhaps a race-based riot… been a while since we’ve had one of those…

21 01 2011
chubbybloodfart

oh yes!
excellent!
I vote for Jingoistic Riot.

21 01 2011
Pandabater

Are Jingoistic Riot in The Hottest 100?

Sorry, couldn’t help myself. 😉

21 01 2011
chubbybloodfart

full marks!

21 01 2011
AntiPajero

I vote at least for a game of Jingo Bingo on talkback radio.

Queue jumpers.
Austrayan values.
Hard working.
Aussie Mums and Dads.
Taxpayers.
Softly softly.
Tough on Crime.
Respect for the [Insert file “Something or other.mp3”] our diggers fought and died for.

That’s my list.

21 01 2011
Will S

There’s a drinking game to be had there…

21 01 2011
chubbybloodfart

yes! it’s like russian roulette.
you have a drink and then listen to talkback radio and shoot yourself in the head.

21 01 2011
Sheriff Struggle

Apparently Katy Perry’s Fireworks has already won. There was a rumour that someone at Triple Arsehat let it slip the other day.

21 01 2011
p'bee

does katy perry even qualify for the hottest 100?

21 01 2011
chubbybloodfart

who the hell is katy perry?

is that lady gaga?

21 01 2011
Pandabater

Yes, in reverse drag.

21 01 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms

I guess given KoL, Alex Lloyd an The Finger have all been past winners she would be as deserving as anyone.

21 01 2011
chubbybloodfart

don’t listen to him.
he’s deranged from exhaustion and altitude sickness.
I love you Simon, but you’re a freak.

I KNOW YOU DO IT JUST TO MAKE ME FEEL BAD ABOUT BEING A SPREADING MIDDLE AGED SEMI EMPHYSEMIC WITH IMPENDING ERECTILE DYSFUNCTION!

WELL IT DOESN’T WORK!!!
so give up. go and grab a tinnie and come and sit on the couch with the rest of us.
freak.

21 01 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms

Hey Chub, rode up Falls Creek this morn. 1hr 42 with the sniffles, not bad for a 30km climb. I do now have an ale in hand. You know, replacing calories. Went up Hotham yesterday for the first time, steep son of a biach for the last 5 km!

21 01 2011
chubbybloodfart

I used to run a lot (only about 5k a day).
One day I realised I liked it because it felt sooo good when I stopped.
so I just stopped.

Have fun buddy. Beautiful spot.

22 01 2011
p'bee

love it, panda.

21 01 2011
Shirley

I can’t decide between spending the flood relief dosh on beer or The Hottest 100. Probably because I can so easily imagine the two going hand in hand.

21 01 2011
chubbybloodfart

it’s about 1200 bucks right?

I can see a kiddy pool, some heroin, a young goat, some M&Ms, a baseball glove and a highlight reel of the flood coverage.

21 01 2011
v'visexxx!on

I was just suggesting to a friend last week that if she is so obsessed with flood footage, she should make a Dvd box set Best of the Flood 2011 highlights reel. It could all be over soon, and then what? Maybe Karl could do the narration and dvd extras/bloopers.

21 01 2011
Shirley

Or she could watch this over and over again.

21 01 2011
chubbybloodfart

sweet jesus.

I’m off to clean out my ears with a half inch wood bit and a hammer drill.

21 01 2011
Le-a

Who WOULD tune into JJJ’s Hottest 100 when you could just listen to this 100 times?!

21 01 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms

F#CK me Shirl. I should glass you for that. That was just plain cruel.

21 01 2011
Shirley

I only watched about 10 seconds. If you went beyond that, you’ve only got yourself to blame.

21 01 2011
Pandabater

I made to the key change, 1:46.
Take me now Jeebus.

21 01 2011
chubbybloodfart

wow.
I only ever knew one other person who said jeebus.
did you ever live at Hughes St?

21 01 2011
Pandabater

I saw it on here.
Isn’t it from some comedy something?

21 01 2011
Pandabater

Simpsons, by Homer.

21 01 2011
Sam

I think it was made by one of the commercial TV stations. I remember it being their jingle for many years *shudders*

21 01 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms

*rocks back and forth sucking thumb*

21 01 2011
urbanreverie

Kim Durant’s original in 1982, “Love You Brisbane”, which Channel 7 up here used to play ad nauseam, was far more stirring.

21 01 2011
v'visexxx!on

I have the original Kim Durant version of Love You Brisbane on vinyl – she also whored the tune out and released a version called Love You Perth. The original is camp – this is downright heinous. Mind you this song will not die.

the original versions for the purists out there are: :http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UCC-jpT9n0Y
and

and then in 1992 – it was whored out again :http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZKZ0eVgOpco&feature=related

21 01 2011
Davo

I listened to the whole thing, it brought a tear to my eye. If i ever hear that fucking song again, i will kill.

22 01 2011
Tombarina

Jesus Christ.

Haven’t people suffered enough?

21 01 2011
Nelson Esq

I was surfing iTunes last night and came across this Aussie comedians stand-up routine called “Bogan Slogans”. It was about a particular knob who went to court after the Cronulla riots and who wore a “I grew here, you flew here” slogan on his T-shirt. The comedian said his Vietnamese neighbour was quite bemused by the bogan slogan but couldn’t quite understand it, especially since he came to Australia by boat. Anyhoo, the Cronulla rioting knob had to state his name, address and occupation in court when he went on trial. The knob was a long term unemployed loser. The Vietnamese bloke, who had come here with nothing and worked his behind off and had a successful business (geez, why we let people in like this, I just don’t know!) thought the fact that this d*ckhead was unemployed AND objected to immigrants coming into Australia was beyond comprehension, so much so that he found out the d*ckheads name and sent him a T-shirt that said “I sailed here, you failed here!” Completely true or not, I don’t know, but it was quite a funny story!

21 01 2011
AntiPajero

Cool story. I want it to be true, so I won’t say “Snopes fodder”.

21 01 2011
Ash -Glasser of C*nts, Kicker of Hipsters and Massive Can Connossieur

I hear that story, UR.

I tend to indulge in patriotic behaviour that many on here would describe as bogan. I never bothered to remove the Southern Cross sticker that was on my car when I bought it, nor have I bothered to get the Southern Cross tattoo my friends thought would be funny to get done on my removed, and I have been known to drape the flag around my shoulders at cricket matches only (again, this depends on how much of the demon drink I happen to have imbibed). This among other, more regular behaviour like displaying an Australian flag in my home, trying to buy locally made stuff where possible and I can afford it, and educating myself on Australian history beyond what I learnt in school.

My parents were both immigrants to Australia, and they managed to come here and own a house, put myself and my sister through school and uni (although I refused to go to private school after year 9) and generally provide well for us…all while being able to come home at 5pm most nights and spend the evenings with us, Dad being able to coach my cricket team, Mum being able to teach us both how to read before we went to school, what have you.

That, to me, is why I love Australia – you can go to plenty of countries in the world with nothing and make a lot of money, but only here can you come and make enough money and live the good life at the same time. (Well, maybe New Zealand, but their weather’s shit and their accents are funny).

21 01 2011
Edward

Some years ago in Perth, ACA/TT did a piece on on a couple of ‘tards who took to flying a World War II German naval battle-flag. They claimed that were doing this simply because they like the way the flag looked, and were unaware of the association with the Third Reich. Given a past familiarity with another German National Socialist Party enthusiast (dodgy share house, which I was relieved to depart from), I know that the flag in question is a popular choice for crypto-fascists, because is doesn’t feature a swastika.

Flags are funny in their symbolic appeal, eh ?

22 01 2011
The Bogan from 'Berra

I like this story Ash. It’s nice to hear of people coming to Australia and leaving all the bullshit of their old way of life behind and doing well.

This is going to sound bad, but i’m going to ask anyway. Why do you think so many families choose to come to Australia but make no effort to fit in?

22 01 2011
p'bee

it doesn’t just sound bad, it is bad. there isn’t some uniform way of being in this country, but only those with the ‘wrong’ colour of skin are questioned when they have the temerity to not be bogan retards. so some people whose first language isn’t english dare to speak in their own language – oh no! the sky is falling! please. if someone from a greek, or lebanese, or vietnamese, or american, or whatever background wants to maintain a connection to their cultural heritage that’s their prerogative.

22 01 2011
The Bogan from 'Berra

Why is it bad? Obviously his folks came here and fully embraced everything the country has to offer and i say good on them.

I never said anything about people maintaining a link with their heritage or speaking different languages at home either…..This does raise an interesting point though, well, it’s interesting to me, you’ll just call me ignorant. Why do people go through all the hassles of coming to Australia, only to directly transpose their way of life in the “old country” to Australia?

And before you start on me, No, i’m not suggesting that everyone should be given a stubby of VB and blue singlet, but maybe there’s a way we could help minimise the dramas faced by new arrivals in Australia.

22 01 2011
p'bee

the thing is that when a one-eyed version of ‘being australian’ is pushed, which is what it has been in the last decade, it ends up magnifying how non-white migrants are ‘the other’. and when that sort of divide is there, people tend to turn inwards, towards their cultural heritage. so basically those overt pushes to assimilate end up being counterproductive.

22 01 2011
Ash -Glasser of C*nts, Kicker of Hipsters and Massive Can Connossieur

p’bee, I reckon your heart’s in the right place here but I also think you’ve missed the point. There has always been a one-eyed ideal of what “being Australian” is, and that ideal has always been predominantly white. As a non-white, I’m not bothered by that. I am bothered only when the door is shut to me or other non-whites because we may not necessarily meet the presented ideal, even if we can do these things as well as our white friends and rivals.

This is one regard where I do believe that we’re getting better. Not just through public figures like Usman Khawaja and Hazem El Masri (the first two who come to mind) but also that many groups and organisations who have been traditionally seen as white-dominated are making a genuine effort to reach out to other communities (Surf Life Saving Australia and their work with young Muslims and Indians are one example).

22 01 2011
Ash -Glasser of C*nts, Kicker of Hipsters and Massive Can Connossieur

Bogan from Berra, I’ll try to answer both your questions at once. I’m planning to do my masters thesis in this field as it’s a topic of interest to me for obvious reasons.

(This is all my opinion here). I believe that immigrants have a responsibility to integrate into Australian society (that, to me, means speaking at least basic English and making an effort to learn more and respecting the laws, rights and democratic freedoms held by others in society no matter what they may be) but, at the same time, the majority culture has to accept that they are changing and learn to embrace the changes. In essence, you have a social contract that has to be upheld by both sides.

Until the double whammy of the Howard Government’s cheap jingoism and our increasing Americanisation (ironic?), it was working in Australia. When we moved to Woolooware in 1996 (after having lived in Liverpool for five years before) saying we stood out was an understatement. We were one of the only ethnic families in the area at the time and certainly the only mixed-race Hindu family. But our neighbours embraced us anyway, and we hugged them back. Every Christmas we’d go for a barbie at our neighbours’ place (although I think that’s more because he knows Dad brings a slab and something for the barbie every year) and every Diwali and Tamil New Year we’d return the favour as the entire street packed into our house for Mum’s gulab jamun or Grandma’s jalebi (still happens). I played sport with all the other guys (and was respected as one of the better footballers/basketball players in the area, not so much for my limited cricket talents), my sister’s mates all were white but wore bangles for a while and were openly jealous of the fact that she was born with the skin tone they had to spend hours under the sun/tanning bed or spray tan to get. Even if we ate different food, looked different and spoke another language at home, there was never any question that we were somehow less Australian than anyone else.

Then you had 9/11 and all the bogans watching the mindless jingoism that followed and thinking “if the Americans are doing it, we should too! AUSSIE AUSSIE AUSSIE OI OI OI!” while ignoring the root cause for such patriotism (i.e. an attack on their nation and the natural national unity that would follow) and that anyone with knowledge of Australian history knows that such blatant patriotism is, frankly, un-Australian. Howard tapped into this with the Tampa fiasco and brought in the racial factor (“you” good, decent, hardworking white Aussies should decide “who” should comes and when) while cleverly milking the situation and spinning it in such a way that “they” were coming in waves to take “our” jobs and “our” taxpayer dollars. Dog whistle politics at its finest. As a citizen it disgusts me, but as a student of politics I take my hat off to the man.

Which leads me to basically answer both questions of yours – the reason why so many immigrants who have come in more recently are not integrating into Australian society but stubbornly cling to the ways of their old country is that they don’t feel that anyone wants them to. One one hand, you have the dipshits who (despite their talk of integration and assimilation and whatever) just want them out, and on the other hand you have the lefties who don’t believe they need to integrate at all – if no one wants you to, why would you bother? You stay in the country because of the opportunity it affords you, but why would you change your lifestyle to one practised by those who clearly despise you?

Now you see the problem – when one side doesn’t uphold it’s side of the social contract, neither does the other.

Some might argue that I’ve got it the wrong way around – that the bogan behaviour is a reaction to immigration – and that’s possible, but that ignores the fact that many older immigrant groups (Specifically the Italians, Greeks and the first wave of Vietnamese and Lebanese) who came to the country eventually settled down and integrated, and were embraced by the Aussie community even if it was just through things like eating their food (cause, come on, everyone loves pizza, souvlaki and kebabs). This is a modern trend, but it’s reversible as long as there’s a national attitude shift. Sadly, to try and change our current national attitude towards new migrants would require more guts and political will than both of our let’s-get-tougher-on-boatpeople parties posess in their collective arse crack.

So, Bogan from Berra, if you want to do something to encourage more immigrants to integrate into Australia – go to the ethnic family down the street, or go up to one of your ethnic co-workers, or any others that you know who may not have integrated as well. Say hi and invite them to a barbecue (as long as they bring something), talk sports (cricket or soccer are obvious areas of common ground), whatever – you get what I mean. Many newer migrants, who tend to immediately get shunted into enclaves with people from their own country (either by choice or by necessity) simply don’t know how the other half lives. It sounds cheesy, but if we all took the time to learn a bit more about each other there’d be far fewer problems.

22 01 2011
The Bogan from 'Berra

Wow. I think i may have a bogan man-crush on you man. This is probably the best explanation of the problems we face that i’ve ever read. I’ve spoken to a lot of my mates and language tutors about this topic and although they didn’t put it as eloquently, they all said roughly the same thing as you have.

There’s a lot of other stuff you said that i agree with. Maybe i’ll type up something tomorrow, but it’s late and i really need to catch up on some beauty sleep.

23 01 2011
@ Ye Olde Glassing Barn

Well put Ash.
I find the evolution of “Americanism” after Sept 11 amazing. It seemed like the Southern Cross became our “Stars & Stripes”.
Intersting the issues you raise about integration. Seems like until the environment is right more immigration just appears to add fuel to the bogans fire.
Tolerance does not seem to be an option.
Why learn about other cultures when “we got the best culture in the world mate”.
I think thta is also an issue. When you have people wanting to move to your country in numbers for opportunities it tends to validate the people who live there as something to aspire to be.
I have learnt in my time there is nothing more dangerous than a bogan who thinks they are right. If they beleive “they are in the right” they are capable of anything with that justification. I love using the example of road rage. if a situation arises where a bit of congestion in the bogans way that should clear quickly given a bit of caution, the bogan will speed up to the situation and be immediately outraged as they know they should have right of way but these “inconsiderate pricks” have managed to hold the bogan up for 5.7 seconds, justifying immediate horn honking and abuse from the window. The amount of times
I have seen this is hilarious. If they see trouble (and they didn’t cause it) but could be the “innocent victim” of it they will rush to get in there and loudly let everyone know that the bogan has been infringed upon.
Dangerous, dangerous stuff.

29 01 2011
Tombarina

Dear Ash

I love you.

Tomba
x

23 01 2011
SD

Actually Berra Bogan I think there is still a lot of confusion regarding being Australian. And its going to remain because its an evolving concept.

I mean I have been here 5 years, am a furriner and yet came 2nd in a trivia quiz on Aussie PMs. But that doesn’t make me an Australian – tho – bogans, its more important to know Aussie PMs than US presidents!.

Also, I think being patriotic means much more than the Southern Cross, tattoos, beer, speaking English, sport, glassing and the like – even if these are the visible symbols of the society.

There’s a lot more to this society than that plus things it can be proud of. I think the boganisation of society that everyone deplores is that patriotism has become just these visible symbols and brash, insecure people claiming to be Australian and being threatened by immigrants. And there is little aspiration to anything better.

Apart from Aussie PMs, 90% of the Australians I know can’t name 5 indigenous tribes-abos is a catch all term. You don’t have to be a bleeding heart liberal to try and know the history of the land you live in before 1788. Knowing your history and a bit more of this land you live in would help before claiming to be patriotic. Its laughable when people who know zilch turn around and accuse immigrants of not integrating – that to me is a hallmark of a bogan.

23 01 2011
SD

To clarify, you is not you i.e Berra bogan but a general term!

21 01 2011
DuxLux

Last Australia Day, while volunteering, the police in my local area were tipped off about a mass rumble at the end of the night. The TRG (riot and dog squad) did a complete sweep of the park. A large group of yobbs were moved along, only to mass at the other end of the site, post fireworks. Next thing, all he’ll broke loose. That was just around the time we we were all due to go home. Sadly we all had to stay an additional 1.5 hours, just because a pack of idiots decided they wanted to conclude A. Day by punching on. My head hit the pillow at 1am that night.

large pack of idiots decided they would do damage to each other

21 01 2011
chubbybloodfart

I think it’s a positive trend.
many more idiots should be doing much more damage to each other.
I was musing the other day that someone should build a big fence around the shire and invite all so inclined to go live in “white aussie paradise”.
maybe abandon some rail cars full of Crack and Guns in there,
let nature take it’s course.

21 01 2011
Ash -Glasser of C*nts, Kicker of Hipsters and Massive Can Connossieur

Fark off Chubby. Leave the Shire alone. I’m not leaving my very nice apartment by the beach just so you can imprison the bogans.

I can’t say I’d be opposed to the concept though. Make it Cairns and you got my assistance.

21 01 2011
chubbybloodfart

deal!
or Melbourne.
Let ’em have Melbourne.

22 01 2011
p'bee

ash, did you ever see the email about the plan for the shire to secede from australia by blowing up captain cook, tom ugly’s, and alfords point bridges and towing the shire out to sea?

22 01 2011
Ash -Glasser of C*nts, Kicker of Hipsters and Massive Can Connossieur

p’bee, actually I did – one of my cousins sent it to me.

I can’t say I wouldn’t go with it, although I’d try and ensure as many Shire scum as possible were on the bridges before they got blown up.

22 01 2011
Mick

Hey!

Actually, build the fence around Queensland. Probably should have done it before all of the floodwaters ran off.

Is it too early for flood jokes?

22 01 2011
Whistling Nixie

Expect another deluge of undrinkable brown muck: the XXXX brewery’s still in action.

23 01 2011
@ Ye Olde Glassing Barn

They will just bottle the swill that is left over and over call it “Gold”.

21 01 2011
Davo

Celebrate Straya day or i kick your black arse back to Africa ya fucking curry.

21 01 2011
chubbybloodfart

can anyone please tell me why the torrent for last night’s Top Chef isn’t up?

jesus. It’s “Restaurant Wars”.
Hello?

21 01 2011
Pendant

It hasn’t pred at all. No release, no torrent. Does seem a bit strange though

21 01 2011
chubbybloodfart

totally odd.
it’s definitely aired…
Edna is giving me hell….

I think we might just watch Anatomy of Hell again,

21 01 2011
Pendant

If not for this post, I would have forgotten about Australia Day. So, thanks, I guess?

You were a harsh mistress, Australia. :stares wistfully into the distance:

21 01 2011
The Bogan from 'Berra

Enjoy…………..

21 01 2011
Pandabater

There is hope for us all.

21 01 2011
urbanreverie

That would be hilarious if it wasn’t so scarily accurate. Here’s something else you might like:

21 01 2011
Will S

moar…

21 01 2011
Werdna

Don’t read the comments under this video.

The dulcet tones of k3k53n: “abbos dont own australia, never have. they are fuckign boat people from gook land.. neck up ya bleedig heart parrot cunt get a fuckin beer or 8 into ya and cook some fucking lamb.”

The beautiful sounds of iSkiTTleSkOpEz: “fuckin hey inbox me if u wanna meet up and smash some asians kunts on “straya Day” BROWN FUCK U RACIST IS AWESOME U DIRY BOONGA ASIAN MUTT GOOK EYED COON 😛 110% Aussie!!!””

The harmonising musings of 2k5R1Pilot: “This was hilarious. 10 / 10. BTW Lebs GTFO of my country. Everyone else your cool.”

Two examples of the sweet mutterings of missaussieproud:
2. “this is the funniest thing iv seen in such a long time! i reckon there would be 1 in every 50 aussies that arn’t actually racist,people are just scared to admit it(apart from this guylol) we are full we have enough people here already,making special schools is shit just so they can learn their crap thats not on,im a hard worker and i pay tax n i dont want it goin to them f that they live here they live like us and learn like us.if u dnt wana f off outta our country so good on ya uv done us proud””

1. “why do you not care it clearly shows that they are low lifes,hell get a job save up nd come here the right way they come over here on their broken arse boats and steal all of our jobs illeagally thats why some aussies are outta work its bs.Their not only taken our jobsther also fillin up all our Tafes etc..why should we miss out?we should get first dibs i reckon. And aus is racist you just need to explore and see what people really think for eg more poeple agree to this vid then not”

Then we have the lovely words of Derkks: “Fuck off aussies are hard working people ya gay poof. We are lazy bludgers and that’s how we like it. If you are gonna talk, then talk properly ya gay cunt. ”

From the omnipotent wisdom of miniman1769: “seriously anyone who doesent find this funny or thinks its rascist have no sense of humour this is fucking hillarious and if ya dont like “get outta my country”

Lastly, the bogan-in-denial barraking states that: “this is so gay fkn bogans, whoever made this shit ass video probably came from warrandyte dum cunts”

Youtube: the best place for calling another viewer a poof/fag.

21 01 2011
Damp Matress

WTF is with all this patriotism? I left this place in 2003 and have been back since mid 2010 but I have seen this rise in invasion day celebrations that I am terrified to even call it invasion day in case I get glassed! seriously what has changed and when did this change happen?

21 01 2011
Will S

2005 Cronulla

people realized this sentiment existed
and that they could sell stickers and flag merchandise

it has become part of our socially acceptable discourse when in the 90s people would have thought you were a dickhead for carrying on in this manner

21 01 2011
HappyFriend

I completely agree. I was living in Singapore and Tokyo from 1998 until 2005. I couldn’t believe the change in the mentality, more stupid tattoos etc.

22 01 2011
Whistling Nixie

Returning from developed Singapore and Japan? Talk about reverse culture shock! You must’ve needed a decompression chamber.

21 01 2011
@ the Ye Olde Glassing Barn

I noticed after Sept 11 that all this nationalistic pride the U.S. were going through rubbed off on us.
The mini flags that the U.S. are famous for started showing up (aussie version of course) on cars and fake tatts.

23 01 2011
Blueballs

Relax, its just a bunch of whitetrash fuckwits that in between reading stories in the Herald Sun about footballers dicks and Nicole Kidman have read that there is a war on… outraged, but otherwise unable to join the army because they’re too fat, lazy, cowardly, stoned or just plain dumb they’ve decided they’re going to stick up the camel riding enemy by persecuting anyone that looks remotely like a ‘person of terrorist decent’. They’re ignorant , insular and due to their poor social status lack the means to develop a world view. They’re also given more publicity than is warranted.

23 01 2011
James Hunter

Bluebag,
Whats your excuse ?

21 01 2011
chubbybloodfart

aww c’mon…
L’anatomie De L’enfer?
Catherine Breillat?
Fat Girl? Romance?
no-one bats an eyelid.
you are a liberal bunch.

21 01 2011
v'visexxx!on

all right . I’m outraged.

21 01 2011
chubbybloodfart

you should be.
you should see what she does to that poor gay fellow.

21 01 2011
James Hunter

He is a masochist and love it

21 01 2011
SD

Europorn. I am batting both eyelids at disposal.

An Old Mistress?

21 01 2011
chubbybloodfart

I haven’t seen it.
Bleak Stuff.
if it is porn, it misses the mark.
I doubt your average pornophile would sit thru it without a remote.

“MARGARET POMERANZ, MOVIE CRITIC: This film although explicit – and it is explicit – is not at all titillating. It’s tremendously serious and it explores the power position, I suppose, of women in a sexual situation.”

explicit but not titillating could sum up la breillat’s oervre in my exp. so far. I feel better for watching them, but I didn’t really like them. A good fillum (or book) can take you to a place you might never have found on your own.
not one for the bogues.

22 01 2011
Simon - Glasser at Arms

I saw Romance (I think). Explict and depressing I thought. How do you make sex that unsexy?

21 01 2011
HappyFriend

I’ll just ignore ‘Convict Day’ as usual and talk to some hot European ladies at my ‘ethnic club’. Let the bogues fight, get pissed and glass some cunt.

22 01 2011
Banjo Lawson

Ah, the irony.

23 01 2011
Muz

FOF!

Genius.

FOF!

24 01 2011
michael

what a great thread. Although I’d have liked to see “Glass some cunt for being unpatriotic by not kissing his fithly, beer soaked, sauce-stained Australian Flag” added to the options up top.
You know it makes sense. I’m Sam Kekovich.

24 01 2011
The Bogan from 'Berra

Just in case anyone was wondering what they should wear on Australia day. I bring you the “morph suit”. http://www.morphsuits.com.au/ProductDetails.asp?ProductCode=MORPH_PREMUIM

24 01 2011
chris

WTF. Two little gobshytes came into my wife’s shop the other day wearing those. Given that the staff had been subjected to a violent holdup a couple of months prior where four large guys with their faces hidden jumped the counter and waved hunting knives about, the mood was not good. The little turds got told to get the fcuk out.

26 01 2011
holden4ever

bathurst nsw has to be capital city for this bogan species. home of the `big race’ has a major claim on the title of `boganville’ aka `blacktown in the bush’

26 01 2011
Will S

CELEBRATE Australia Day.

Celebrate the highest per capita carbon emissions in the world
Celebrate the highest rate of obesity in the world
Celebrate the most racist country in the developed world
Celebrate the worst conditions suffered by indigenous people in the western world
Celebrate a country whose flag still has the symbol of a genocidal empire that invaded and systematically dismantled and nearly annihilated the oldest culture in the world
Celebrate our lapdog participation in America’s illegal wars
Celebrate our use of people fleeing these wars for political gain
Celebrate a culture which amounts to idiots getting drunk

Celebrate Invasion Day.

26 01 2011
James Hunter

Will, Do you not have a pressing engagement in some far off land ?
If you dislike this place so much , piss off.

26 01 2011
p'bee

please. one-eyed love of a country and refusal to question it is much worse than criticism.the ‘love it or leave’ attitude is one of the most definingly bogan things there is. i’m not sure i’d agree with will that australia is the most racist developed nation (the rise of vehemently anti-immigrant parties throughout europe means there are a number of places giving us a run for our money on that count), but everything else he said is entirely true. and those who are most gung-ho in celebrating the date that a group of unauthorised boat people arrived 223 years ago are the exact same people with the most hostility towards new migrants. ignorant hypocrites.

26 01 2011
Will S

Cheers mate, knew you’d understand

26 01 2011
James Hunter

Pee bee,
All countries except south Africa were invaded by someone and in the last half century most everywhere has been invaded by boat people so get over it.
Mind you the way some talk perhaps they feel all the invadees would be happier living under bark and leaves>

Invasion and territorial gains by way of war was how everyone did things then. The world has mooved on . Time for you to do the same.
Live today in todays world. Otherwise get yourself a Tardis and go back somewhere you will feel comfortable.

26 01 2011
p'bee

classy response there.
you say the world has moved on – but the fact that many people still feel hurt by history shows this to be false. you might not care, but your not caring doesn’t mean others’ opinions and feelings are illegitimate. also boat people aren’t ‘invading’ – they’re seeking asylum, something completely legal under international law.
and the ‘go back somewhere you will feel comfortable’ comment is incredibly dumb. that’s the sort of argument people resort to when they don’t have any substance to contribute to a debate. i.e. the bogan anti-intellectual response.

26 01 2011
James Hunter

Wow, and others resourt to jingoistic popularism straight from a ninetys student union handbook or the boat chasers guide for unemployed lawyers.

26 01 2011
p'bee

‘boat chasers guide for unemployed lawyers’. that’s just tacky. as is the implicit dismissal of universities and ‘educated elites’ in your student union line. and the jingoistic populist line is the ‘if you don’t love it, leave’ argument that you used. questioning that attitude, daring to criticise australia, is definitely not populist.

27 01 2013
Reuben

Bogan History haha

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