While its mating patterns have been mentioned before, there exists an interesting anomaly in bogan behaviour. In the months of September and October, a migration of bogan males of breeding age occurs as the weather begins to grow warmer. But instead of flying south to more temperate climes, flocks of footy playing bogans will board a Jetstar bogan bus and migrate northwards towards the tropics. After having spent the winter months foraging for a leather ball, the bogan male is now ready to dedicate all of its time to binge drinking and rutting.
Flocks of southern bogan fly to different tropical breeding grounds, with some flocks returning to the very same site year after year. Large footy trip breeding grounds are found in Byron Bay, Surfers Paradise, Noosa, and as far north as Bali and Phuket. While the bogan’s ancestors came to many of these places to breed, the bogan has recently had to adapt to the changing conditions. The availability of exotic fruits such as rohypnol, ecstasy, and tequila slammers has caused the bogan’s feeding habits to change, as has the advent of higher perching sites – some up to 60 storeys high. The male bogan has been known to feed these fruits to females on its perch, fulfilling its role as hunter gatherer.
While some things have changed, some have not. The availability of water is crucial to bogan breeding, causing intense pecking and glassing amongst footy tripping bogan males in coastal areas to secure the best breeding sites. The presence of flock members named Hammer, Jonno, Shagger, Tank, and Spider has also been a constant for generations of bogan male. The bogan who is able to mate with the most females is generally anointed as leader. These attempts at bareback mating will continue throughout the night, with varying levels of success.
Like a bee dancing the details of the whereabouts of pollen to the rest of its hive, the footy tripping bogan reports in vivid detail its mating attempts to the rest of its migratory flock. This behaviour is evolving, however, with many bogan males now using mobile phones to record themselves or other members of their flock mating. The footage is displayed to the rest of the flock, in all its flapping and squawking glory. Many footy tripping bogans possess breeding partners back near their winter foraging grounds, and these partners are not, under any circumstances, permitted to learn of the happenings at the October breeding site. To prevent this from occurring, the footy tripping bogans have devised a special call to each other; “what happens on tour stays on tour”. If a member of the flock breaks this code, they are banished and forced to seek mating partners without the assistance of the pack.
At the conclusion of its annual week-long period in the tropics, the sunburnt, liver damaged, and gonorrhoea-afflicted bogan will take wing once more, and return south. It will arrive back at the nest of its normal mating partner, who will nurture the male back to health over the following 11 months.