#172 – Unsolicited music requests

8 09 2010

Unbeknownst to the bogan, there exists an entire galaxy of music outside of Commercial Radio and Ministry of Sound compilations. Hunched in its colony of rubbish, it does not wish to actually explore any of it for fear of finding something that falls outside of its wafer thin comfort zone. This generally serves the bogan well, as it rarely ventures from locations it is extremely familiar with, except perhaps to attend the odd Indie Rock gig to participate in a spot of chorus chanting and hipster bashing. Then one boozy evening, it will accidentally find itself at an establishment that is truly horrifying. It does not recognise any of the music being played. Not even the choruses. The bogan is livid. Outrage coursing through its veins, it seeks to remedy the situation the only way it knows how. By repeatedly bellowing unsolicited requests to play ‘California Gurls‘. Or that sick David Guetta remix.

A true battler, the bogan never gives up. If anything, being comprehensively dismissed only means it has to try harder. Anthony Robbins once told it that. After all, everything leading up to this moment has suggested it should not be there, like Asian involvement in the residential property market. But one of its mates told it to “bloody drink a giant cup of harden the fuck up”, so it persisted.

First, there was NO velvet rope behind which it could uneasily shuffle for 20-30 minutes, occasionally craning its vascular neck past the entrance to scan for celebrities or hot Asian chicks. Then, upon free entry, and thoroughly confused, notices that it does not recognise some of the beers on tap and there is not one person sporting an Ed Hardy t-shirt or penguin-slaughtering amounts of hair product. Now, nervous and scared, it hastily proceeds to the bar and orders two Jager bombs and a schooner of Beck’s. It then briefly forgets about its schizophrenic state and follows a hot chick onto the dance floor, only to find her singing verbatim to a song it has no idea about. It briefly ponders thrusting its mobile phone at the DJ to display its illuminated request for the ninth time, but then realises that it’s probably in a gay club anyway and lunges for the exit. On the way home from the pub club hybrid that it eventually ended up at, it demands that the taxi driver changes the radio station to “something awesome”. Five minutes later, the thudding sound of The Black Eyed Peas is punctuated by the rhythmic audio of the bogan vomiting on the back seat.


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276 responses

8 09 2010
Shirley M

This is also applicable in people’s houses and at parties. ‘This music is shit. Lemme hook up my iPod, they’re all awesome tracks’! Not to mention shouting out at concerts for that one song, over and over and over again. But I think that was covered in Indie Rock Chorus. Always worth having a whinge about, though.

8 09 2010
Tone

This is why I only hold parties about once every 5 years, and when we DO have a party, the stereo equipment is in a locked room away from the main action.

8 09 2010
Shirley M

I take a very dictatorial position. My party. My music.

8 09 2010
Chairman Miaow

Agreed. It’s the goddamn height of rudeness to override the party-giver’s music selections. Out on yer ear guttersnipe, I say. And take your cruiser pack with you.

8 09 2010
Tone

Funny you should mention Cruiser Packs.

At the last party we held (in 2004), we provided beer – 2 slabs of Coopers Sparkling, 2 slabs of West End Draught (there are a whole stack of bogans on Mrs Tone’s side of the family).

The next day, we were left with 51 stubbies of West End Draught and about 3 stubbies of Coopers. Do the maths.

8 09 2010
lol-plates

Coopers is nice?
I like Coopers. The best trick to play is provide beer that need bottle openers.

8 09 2010
lol-plates

err isn’t there 24 in a slab… unless beer can breed how did you end up with 51 bottles?

8 09 2010
Tone

Correct. The old ‘bring any old shit and exchange it for something half-decent’ trick, another Thing Bogans Like.

8 09 2010
lol-plates

Supply black beer and watch people complain 🙂
I like black beer so thats what I take to parties, no one steals mine.

8 09 2010
Will S

Black beer is also a thing I like. Not so much bogans though!

9 09 2010
Bag O'Turnips

Like Tooheys Old or Cooper’s Best Stout?

Acquired tastes, both, of which I can dig.

8 09 2010
Pablo

Mrs Tone’s bogan family member brought around a 6-pack of West End, drank 3 as an entree to the main course of 8 cans of Woodstock she also brought along

8 09 2010
Tone

Close, but it was actually MY bogan family member that did that. They also managed to outstay their welcome by a day and a half.

You now know why the last time we held a party was 2004.

8 09 2010
James Hunter

Lol,
darl, lotaslabs nowadays have 30
Mind you when I lift a slab in our shows I always go for anything that is in 24s

8 09 2010
Chairman Miaow

What is it with that stuff? Sugar content through the roof to cover the taste of the poorly distilled alcohol and a food colouring/chemical add in list that puts a box of cheezels to shame.

Actually, I know the secret. Not ‘the secret’, but none-the–less… the marketing premise of most cruiser-type stuff is to appeal to the 16 year old drinker; the bogue has the comprehension and slack-jawed reasoning processes of a 16 year year old, ipso facto, Cruisers are for me.

8 09 2010
Persephone

There is now a Cruiser flavour “Electric Pink” yes, really.

8 09 2010
pb

pink is a flavour now? i guess that’s like purple being a fruit.

8 09 2010
Will S

I don’t know, I teach some pretty smart 16 year olds. The Daily Telegraph supposedly writes at a 7 year old reading level, so…

8 09 2010
Pablo

Was West End Export not available??? Do they still make that shit?

9 09 2010
Bag O'Turnips

I dunno about Croweater beers, but I can speak for suckarse Sangroper piss, such as the late and unlamented Swan Gold, which was a mid-strength beer utterly bereft of any flavour. And there’s also our answer to West End Export, Emu Export, which is a very malty full-strength, strictly old-school bogan…little wonder why the appellation of “wife beater’s piss” applies to it. Still in king browns (of which I purchase both Cooper’s Pale and Sparkling in, to one, retain the crown-topped bottles for sauce, and two, ’cause I love those brewskis) and easily the cheapest full-strength by the slab at most liquor stores in WA.

I also believe another extinct old-school brew, Reschs Dinner Ale (from Sydney) was also similarly flavour-free, from what people from that neck of the woods old enough to know have told me.

9 09 2010
Mick

Emu Export. I had some ex-west type bogans ask me to bring a slab back to Queensland for them. Seems to be unavailable in the east. I guess there is a damn good reason for that.

Didn’t have the heart to tell them that the only time they would see me carrying that rubbish was if it was to weigh me down as I took a long walk on the ocean floor.

Awful, awful stuff. Yet still better than the SP Lager in New Guinea. It’s all relative I suppose.

11 09 2010
Bag O'Turnips

Export, eh?

Exported to where?

Up North? Christmas Island? Bloody Rottnest? I think someone had forgot to realise that those destinations don’t count.

8 09 2010
Brimstone

i dunno… i’ve been to parties that encourage it. i did kinda kill a night when the host found out that there was nothing on my iPod you can dance to

8 09 2010
James Hunter

Brimstone,
maybe the sound track from apocalypse now ?

9 09 2010
Brimstone

given that most of my mates are Doors fans, that wouldn’t kill it at all

29 01 2013
Houdini

We had the best time at your party…

8 09 2010
Sibyl Ince

If a guest is complaining about your music choices, you have the wrong mix of guests. Eject one and plan better next time.

8 09 2010
pellicle

awww … be fair, the average bogan can’t play any instrument and has had no musical training at all. So music represents more the background sounds to associate times with .. times at the pub … times when they got drunk … times when they were doing burnouts in lou’s ute

9 09 2010
Bag O'Turnips

That’s bullshit! Yes, they can!!!

Guitar Hero and Rock Band, anyone?

😛

9 09 2010
Sten

Oh, and isn’t there some kind of DJ Hero thing these days, Turnips? Does it not allow the Bogue to MaxXx out in the slammin’ stylings of the Hilltop Hoods and bog-standard Ministry of Sound “artists”?

11 09 2010
Bag O'Turnips

And they can be as fully sik as their wheels-of-steel hero, David Guetta!

8 09 2010
Simon - Glasser at Arms

Play some Chisel ya carnts!!

8 09 2010
Simon - Glasser at Arms

I often get in trouble for my music selection at my parties. Often gets referred to as atonal white noise?

8 09 2010
Shirley M

F*ck ’em, Simon.

8 09 2010
lol-plates

Ah Noisecore, where would we be with out it?

8 09 2010
Tone

In Boglish, ‘atonal white noise’ translates to ‘what’s this f*cken poofter shit!?! Gi’us some CHISEL you caaaarnts!!’

8 09 2010
Brimstone

no offense, but having listened to lots of atonal noise i’d still prefer Chisel

8 09 2010
hel

atonal white noise? Is that the David Guetta remix of the living end song?

8 09 2010
Simon - Glasser at Arms

I like to put on Sonic Youth’s Diamond Sea, the 18 minute version and turn it up loud. That f*cks em with it’s 12 minutes of feedback.

8 09 2010
Anonymous Bosch

If they’re calling it ‘atonal white noise’, and not ‘shit’, then they’re not Bogans.

9 09 2010
Bag O'Turnips

Once, and I think I’ve already mentioned it somewhere here, one night patronising Perth’s bogan (well, more the older-school types) mecca, the Hip-E Club, I asked the DJ there, as a dare to my friend, to play “Revolution 9”, the John & Yoko musique concrète sound collage, as featured infamously on The Beatles’ eponymous double white album.

Amazingly, the DJ, whom I became friends from there on with, did accede to my most obscure request, given that the previous 999 times out of a thousand he’d been asked to ploy sum Chisools, Acca Dacca or Voylent Femms, later finding out his distaste for that tawdry tosh. So for eight-or-so minutes—mind you, this was early in the night, before the hordes well-and-truly filled the joint—everyone else but us three involved in this ruse was having their sensibilities offended by a Beatles “tune” (I use the term very loosely) they’d never heard on the golden oldies station. I actually rather get into this piece, always something you never heard buried within before. And I’ve listened to Number 9 countless times.

The bewilderment that this weren’t “Blister In The Sun” or “Khe Sanh” on their faces was worth the admission, of which was free-plus-a-bottom-shelf-drink early on.

8 09 2010
Simon - Glasser at Arms

That’s anal white noise Hel.

8 09 2010
Shirley M

Heh!

8 09 2010
hel

I stand corrected, I believe the abbreviate name however is “shit”

8 09 2010
Brimstone

i like the single version of Diamond Sea

and White Noise. though i’m convinced The Living End borrowed the chorus from The Hold Steady, who were recording at the same studio the same time they recorded that album. and they shared a keyboardist

8 09 2010
Peter

Hang on, do you mean to suggest that your repeated request for John Butler are declined? I suppose there really is a limit to the amount of altruism that a bit of middle-class guilt can induce then.

8 09 2010
James Hunter

Pete Babe
. !

10 09 2010
James, anti Anti-Intellectual

Yes Peter. We all like John Butler. You are very clever.

8 09 2010
Chairman Miaow

Ah yes. Bogan music taste. The real problem is the massive insecurity the bogue feels in taking something ‘new’ back to it’s clan and being told it’s shit mate that kills off anything under 10 years old in bogue circles. Unless the artists already has the bogue tick of approval, (like Barnsy). New music has no hope until it’s old.

In me younger days I played in a band, mostly in inner city sweat boxes and we learnt early on that you better have Jumping Jack Flash and plenty of Jean Genie in your back pocket if you did a country pub. Which was hard when you were Psychedelic Fur wanna-bes.

8 09 2010
Brimstone

oh, how horrible. you had to play of the Stones 10 best songs and one of Bowie’s best ever songs. what a tragedy

8 09 2010
vivisection

But who wants to hear a cover of either of them?

8 09 2010
Brimstone

i would… hell i saw a great Stones covers night

i prefer originals, but i’d love to just play amped up covers of classic rock and punk songs. belting them out is soooooooooo much fun

8 09 2010
Chairman Miaow

It’s all moment in time stuff.

When you’re young n keen you wanna play all your own stuff and fuck ’em if they don’t like it.

When you’re older (and still playing, or rediscovering your youth) you understand you’re mostly a karaoke covers band playing music people grew up to. You have become … the wedding singer.

Still, banging away at some classics to a bunch a happy drunks is a whole lotta fun.

8 09 2010
Shirley M

Playing popular covers is great fun. Love seeing a bunch of people singing along, dancing and thinking you’re awesome.

8 09 2010
Chairman Miaow

We (middle-aged rediscoverers), had 30-40 people walking in unison round the hall last Sat to the Proclaimer’s 500 miles song. Excellent fun! In our heads we were awesome.

8 09 2010
Brimstone

there’s a mix, though. i do the spoken word/poetry/wanky stuff and there’s always a place for covers

and i honestly have more fun belting out Ever Fallen In Love or I Want You To Want Me or my bitter version of Can’t Get You Out Of My Head

hell i basically started a band ’cause i had fun doing kareoke

8 09 2010
Chairman Miaow

BTW Brim, there’s a Zep tribute band at the Enmore Thursday week.

Hottest drummer is Au at the moment – Gordon Rytmeister – and some classy vocalists (Dave Gleeson for eg).

If you love watching seriously good musos do their stuff to some classic material, get on down there.

8 09 2010
Will S

I saw an advert for a Pink tribute, supported by a Robbie Williams tribute, at a local RSL. How bogan is too bogan?

8 09 2010
Sten

I dunno, CM, around my neck of the woods is a great abnd comprised of folks in their mid-late 40s. They play their own stuff, admittedly in an older blues-rock style, and they have quite a following among young and old(er).

Man, they’ve been around for years, too. They’re called the Galley Slaves, if anyone’s interested.

8 09 2010
Chairman Miaow

Long may they run.

8 09 2010
Sten

Indeed yes. I make a point of always seeing them whenever they play my local.

8 09 2010
devil's advocate

Is this similar to the bogan requirement to walk into a sports bar and demand that their particular code of football be displayed on the largest tv regardless of what everyone else is watching? Kind of like cultural imperialism on a micro scale?

Or is that another TBL post entirely?

8 09 2010
Michael

This is one of your best. As an indie DJ, this is something I know all too well. I once had some guy try and give me $20 to play Kings Of Leon. I still refused.

Over the years, I really should have made a list of the rubbish requets. Some are hilarious in their awfulness.

8 09 2010
AntiPajero

Such as Call on MEEEEEEEE! Call on ME!

Fricken hate that qrap.

9 09 2010
Bag O'Turnips

If it’s done in the Bill Withers style, then it can be simple and elegant, rather than that tacky 1986 Club Nouveau version, which is invariably what they want…shove that.

8 09 2010
Brimstone

if it was Summer of 69, that was me

8 09 2010
Chairman Miaow

I was Bohemian Rhapsody.

That always cleared the floor until Wayne’s World and then it was mullets bouncing in unison all over the place.

8 09 2010
YB

I was “The Final Countdown”.

8 09 2010
Nelson Esq

Grease mega-mix anyone?

9 09 2010
AntiPajero

“Sing along with the common people! Sing along and it might just get you through!”

Sorry, dude. That one was me.

9 09 2010
pb

never apologise for requesting pulp!

8 09 2010
Tone

Is it just me, or does today’s blog photo look like it was taken and then processed by one of the subjects of #171?

8 09 2010
pb

you may be right, tone.

8 09 2010
Glass 'em all

“penguin-slaughtering amounts of hair product.” Hahahahahahaha.

9 09 2010
Snag

I’m with you. That line was priceless!

8 09 2010
Mitch-Jay

Hipster Bashing (Y)

8 09 2010
Brimstone

i kinda get this on a country-wide level. used to consider myself as having broad tastes, but there isn’t much of a dance music culture in the States, and over here indie has been cross-pollinated with dance…. so i’m actually more at home with bogan bands like The Angels

8 09 2010
Brimstone

PLAY SOME FUCKING STOOGES!

8 09 2010
Benny Hill

I hate parties more than nightclubs. I either get smashed or stoned or both to put up with both the music and the people and does everyone need to have a gay friend at a party? It’s the new token black friend.

Two weeks ago at a party some knob jockey comes out with a heap of Mickey D’s food trays, he puts one under each rear wheel of his front wheel drive car and proceeds to slide around the court bowl like his in the fast and the furious. Oh how we laughed. I can now see why people resort to drugs.

8 09 2010
Shirley M

I know when I have a party, I go out of my way to secure at least one of the homos I know. Makes me look cool, y’know?

Sheesh!

8 09 2010
vivisection

Maybe I could profit from this phenomena – create and whore out a BGF (Best Gay Friend) persona for bogan parties. I’ll shriek loudly, bring along my own penis straw, knee slap wildly when bogans brown eye the police….. Hourly rates should weed out the really awful clients.

8 09 2010
Shirley M

“Hire a Homo”. Campness adjusted to your needs.

8 09 2010
vivisection

Without too much effort I could do:

Mr Humphries: Non sexually threatening, Pussy jokes and double entendre for the older crowd;

Talentless but Arty Homo: put on a black turtleneck and skinny jeans and black rim glasses – spend the night criticising clothes, hair and karaoke talent of guests (easy $$). Discuss film projects on the boil that will never happen to anyone not walking. Perfect for the boguette who just moved into the inner city.

Bon Vivant Homo – loud shirts, shrieking, pissed by 9.30, holding straight girls hair while we vomit by 10pm, hitting on straight guys by 10.30pm, grass stains on knees by 11pm.

I’m sure with thought I can do even more.

8 09 2010
pb

you need to also do gossipy gay: discussing everyone’s secrets and sex lives in detail, bitching about anyone not there, lots of comforting of boguettes unhappy with their boyfriends with comments about how the former boyfriend just couldn’t see boguette’s obvious brilliance and boguette is better off without him, followed by comments about ex-boyfriend’s genitalia and sexualt performance. all of this should be discussed at a considerably louder volume than everyone else.

8 09 2010
SD

Can you do Daffyd Thomas?

Or will be no boguette want the only gay in the village?!

8 09 2010
SD

duh I have no idea what “be” is doing in there.

8 09 2010
vivisection

Good ideas SD and PB – The Gossipy Gay can enthrall all and sundry with tales of threeway orgies with closeted celebrities and any comfort offered to the boguette will naturally involve two faced eye rolling and suggestive blow job faces to her B/F while she is sobbing and heaving against my chest. It is expected.

Daffyd will be popular with the larger lass who enjoys one dimensional conversation peppered with zingy catchphrases which may include “Oooh Missus” and “Oh Girrrrl”. Pb, I may need help with the costumes for this one.

I was thinking maybe a Disco Bitch / Circuit Queen too: I’ll need to tone up, get shirtless at the drop of hanky, snort lots of cheap amyl and wave my hands in the air like I just don’t care to David Guetta remixes all night. A sensible shade of tangerine should make it believable.

8 09 2010
pb

i’ve had a bit of a look for costumes, i think the middle pic here would be a great look for gossipy gay, the matching t-shirt and hoodie are too much to pass up: http://tinyurl.com/259mb9k

for your daffyd character, the blue floral with lace up white peep toe boots here (4th picture down) is great: http://www.564935.com/?p=252

8 09 2010
vivisection

Nice work – can you get floral vinyl though? It must be vinyl, and inappropriately figure hugging.

8 09 2010
pb

you’re a hard taskmaster, viv, but i’ve tried to find you something. it isn’t really floral, but something that tries to be much artier than that: http://tinyurl.com/2695ot3

8 09 2010
vivisection

I can see with the right faux fur trim we could have an autumn winner!

8 09 2010
8 09 2010
vivisection

Oh, I’ve already got one of those outfits.

8 09 2010
vivisection

I can’t believe for a moment that a self respecting gay would have been at that party. Maybe a bogueaye? A curious critter indeed. Parties, like nightclubs are all the same, ego feeders or destroyers for the hosts, and an opportunity for guests to try and present their otherwise boring lives as fascinating for an evening. I avoid them now that I couldn’t give a shit about what others think of me.

8 09 2010
Brimstone

house parties > gigs > pubs > clubs

a bad house party is usually equal to at least a mediocre gig, and a good house party is probably worth skipping a gig for unless you really like the band

8 09 2010
Brimstone

yeah, who wouldn’t want a bitter misanthrope such as yourself at a party?
i think of house parties as places to chill out, have a jam, meet some new people, talk to people you know without the pretext of a gig… but whatever

8 09 2010
vivisection

I’ve been to too many parties, to see the same tired old cliches and routines played out. Good luck to those who enjoy it, I once did and don’t claim to be any better. I’ve just moved on to different pursuits.

8 09 2010
Brimstone

i’m the reverse. i used to be a total shut in, but i prefer going out now… i do live in the Inner West, so everybody’s a few degrees away from everyone else

i did get red paint splashed on my favorite leather jacket and jeans at one party though… ouch

8 09 2010
Shirley M

Bet you’d LOVE one of my parties, Viv.

8 09 2010
Pendant

“as the it rarely ventures from locations”

You’re just doing it on purpose now

8 09 2010
Dgusten

The flip side of this is the bogan (or just as likely hipster) DJ who refuses to accept requests – I’ve been to work functions at which the DJ is too busy playing the crap that he (always a he) wants to play, despite the fact that being hired for a function means that you are implicitly required to play songs that the crowd would like to hear.

Occasionally he’ll succumb and play a request, only to ignore the fact the dancefloor has filled with a tsunami of people that immediately subsided he infuriatingly goes back to his own choices…

8 09 2010
Dan

“Do you know Khe Sahn?”

8 09 2010
Shirley M

California Girls wasn’t there originally, was it TBL?

‘Twasn’t, indeed. But ‘Sex on Fire’, which was there when we wrote this months ago, is a bit passe these days…TBL

8 09 2010
Shirley M

Understood. Just pleased to know I’m not making shit up as I go along.

8 09 2010
Dgusten

To be a pendant, I think you’ll find the title of the song (for no apparent reason) is actually spelt “California Gurls”.

With badass spelling like that I can’t wait to see the bogan baby names that Katy comes up with down the track.

You’re right. We fixed it. We have fully functioning spelling glands here at TBL, and find it hard to intentionally misspell words. TBL

8 09 2010
pb

i’m surprised it isn’t gurlzzz. because adding z is almost as maxxtreme as adding x.

8 09 2010
Dgusten

Sure iz.

8 09 2010
James, anti Anti-Intellectual

Speaking of x, I was flicking through the channels last night, while reading Hugh White’s excellent Quarterly Essay, and couldn’t help but notice that Prime (the Canberra version of Seven) has a huge X emblazoned across the logo in the bottom corner of the screen. Good to see they are finally showing their colours.

8 09 2010
pb

well 7 have recently announced the launching of 7mate, maybe prime is changing its name to maxxxtreme prime?

8 09 2010
Tone

Or perhaps ‘Primate’?

8 09 2010
pb

genius!

8 09 2010
Sten

Yeah, but aren’t Bogans called “Booners” down in the howling wastes of Canberra?

I love regional dialects.

8 09 2010
Rob

Definitely not to anyone under 20.

8 09 2010
Sten

Hmm, I guess even within the scope of Australian culture, McDonaldization exists.

8 09 2010
Peter

Definitely; as does Robbie Williamsization aka King inbred of inbred central.

8 09 2010
Anonymous Bosch

What about ‘September Gurls’ by Big Star? All rock hipsters cream over them.

8 09 2010
Brimstone

Katy Perry’s management actually convinced her to change the spelling of California Girls as a tribute to that song

such a good song

8 09 2010
Brimstone

with all due respect, TBL, the spelling was done in tribute to the great Alex Chilton and Big Star

http://www.mtv.com/news/articles/1639184/20100513/perry_katy.jhtml

9 09 2010
Bag O'Turnips

“California Girls”—the one by the Beach Boys—is a sure-fire two-way bet, for you’ll have the trendies who’ll nod approvingly at Brian Wilson’s then-nascent rise as the auteur of pop while simultaneously satisfying the older bogues who try unsuccessfully demonstrating their falsetto skillz for the chorus. As for the Van Halen version, pure hair metal bogan favourite, which is best avoided.

Never heard the version spelt with a U, though…am I missing out on much? Am I musically illiterate for not knowing of it, or is it something my ignorance at that end of the market has served me well in?

8 09 2010
Gorery

I usually find myself going to bogan parties in a Napalm Death shirt and demanding to hear pre-89 Metallica songs.

8 09 2010
Gorey

I don’t usually spell my own name wrong though.

8 09 2010
lol-plates

I usually front up in a scraggy Emperor T or an even scraggier COF shirt for bogan happenings. Same thing with the Tallica, talk my way into nightclubs and do the same. 😛

8 09 2010
Brimstone

i’m not sure why i don’t own an AC/DC shirt

or where my awesome Rolling Stones logo shirt went
or my zombie Ramones shirt

8 09 2010
Shirley M

Band T-Shirts. As was remarked to me recently, the only time they should be worn is post-coital. End of story.

8 09 2010
Brimstone

i’m slowly phasing non-band shirts out of my collection
besides my pinball shirts

i work at a music website and in my free time i go to gigs. what should i wear?

i’m doubling up now… Perry Keyes shirt under a Who hoodie

8 09 2010
Shirley M

Do you have a significant other Brimstone?

If yes, I commend her/him.

If no, and you’d like one, save the band shirts for home time.

8 09 2010
Brimstone

what the fuck else am i supposed to wear?
and how else will people know what i like?

still kicking myself for not talking to the girl in the Gaslight Anthem shirt on Saturday

8 09 2010
Brimstone

and no, i don’t have a significant other. but again, given that i socialize at gigs and pubs and parties i don’t think suiting up is going to work

8 09 2010
Sten

Especially not in the Inner-West, unless it’s some kind of retro pin-striped number, eh Brimstone?

8 09 2010
common man

@brim,imagine the mass bogans wearing fox/unit clothes at crustys,Yes we all wear the same clothes,cool ha?? says one bogue to the next

8 09 2010
SD

Just put it in mX – even girls in Gaslight Anthem shirts read it 🙂

8 09 2010
Shirley M

Why do people have to know what you like?

Anyway, if I were single, there is no way I’d shag any dude who was wearing a band t-shirt to see a band. If said dude was wearing the t-shirt of the band he was seeing, I would laugh and point and laugh and groan. And laugh.

8 09 2010
Brimstone

i don’t usually wear a band’s shirt to the band’s gig

but band shirts are a massive part of rock/live music culture. and i like them

8 09 2010
Shirley M

Fair enough. I hope you like them more than getting laid, because it’s rare that the two coincide. 😉

8 09 2010
vivisection

You mean my B52’s as skeletons t-shirt can’t be worn Shirley? I won’t abide.

8 09 2010
Brimstone

yeah, once Shirley sees my kickass Misfits shirt or my awesome Drive-By Truckers t she’ll change her mind

8 09 2010
vivisection

The only rule I’ve heard about band shirts is that they can’t be worn the day after the gig. Which is sensible. I don’t have many anymore, the only one I regret giving away was my Poison Look What The Cat Dragged In shirt where they were dressed up to look like cheap hookers.

8 09 2010
Shirley M

The kitsch value makes it ok to wear in public, in this particular case.

8 09 2010
Brimstone

are you one of the kids at the start of Piranha 3D who makes fun of the main character’s Pixies shirt?

i love seeing band shirts spread around Sydney after a good, big gig (R.E.M., Leonard Cohen, etc)

8 09 2010
Brimstone

fuck kitsch or irony. if i wear shirt or a badge it’s because i like whatever it is it’s advertising

and somebody who won’t fuck me ’cause i’m wearing a band shirt probably isn’t somebody i want to hang out with

8 09 2010
Shirley M

Who said anything about hanging out with them? 😉

Don’t get cranky Brimstone, I’m just taking the piss. You do what makes you happy, dude.

9 09 2010
Tombarina

Viv, I still have my Poison slurry T – a fragile and priceless item of apparel.

Sole Offspring requested a vintage band T for his birthday – Run DMC. Is that bogan? Pish and tush if it is…..

9 09 2010
vivisection

Never let it go Tombarina, the sense of regret never fades. Unlike Brett Micheal’s looks, which took a sharp downturn in my opinion…. But nowhere near as badly as Axl Rose’s mind. Bali beads WTF??

9 09 2010
Bag O'Turnips

Mind you, I ain’t parting with my TISM band shirts under any circumstances. Very clever with their merchandising, they were, always had people ask about them.

8 09 2010
Gorey

Wow, a comment I made to fix a mistake I made in a previous comment appeared, but the original comment didn’t. Or did it, and I just have a shit browser?

8 09 2010
Gorey

D’oh! That’s enough from me now. Carry on…

8 09 2010
martin

Guilty. I can’t stand the poncy pretentious shit that people listen to today, whether it be some libtard tossers or some techno wankers. Pretty much everyone in the world needs to be glassed for their music tastes.

8 09 2010
Brimstone

i listen to Springsteen, and bands that sound like Springsteen. whether you’re a bogan or a wanker you can agree he’s awesome

8 09 2010
martin

Yeah he done some good songs aye.

8 09 2010
Shirley M

I don’t agree he’s awesome. What does that make me?

8 09 2010
martin

A poncy libtard.

8 09 2010
Shirley M

I would have thought something more like ‘discerning’. Guess I was wrong.

8 09 2010
Simon - Glasser at Arms

Bruce Springsteen has spent his whole life wishing he was Neil Young.

8 09 2010
Brimstone

except ‘poncy libtards’ should at least respect a guy who’s written so many songs about worker’s rights and police violence, organized for Obama, etc

8 09 2010
Shirley M

I didn’t say I didn’t respect him. I just don’t like his wanky soft rock brand of dribble.

8 09 2010
Brimstone

eh, fair enough. heaps of punks give him props, though, and i love most of the bands he’s inspired

that and telling people i was born one town away from him

8 09 2010
Sten

Not to my tastes, but I do like his brand of politics, so I respect the guy.

8 09 2010
martin

I’d much rather listen to some chisel than any of today’s music, they had some good musicians, the bass lines are nice, I used to play bass so I like a good bass line.

8 09 2010
Simon - Glasser at Arms

F*ck Martin, next thing we know you will be listening to U F*cking 2.

8 09 2010
martin

Yeah I’d even rather listen to U2. I bet you would TOO. You’re a closet U2 lover.

8 09 2010
Simon - Glasser at Arms

Nuh, but secretly don’t mind the occasional Chisel. Please don’t tell anyone.

8 09 2010
Brimstone

yeah i gotta say coming from the States i don’t get it. i’m supposed to hate The Angels? and Chisel? and The Living End? and maybe AC/DC? they’re all great rock bands!

8 09 2010
Brimstone

to quote the Bouncing Souls – ‘Give me a reason to sing and i’ll sing along forever’. fuck all this electro house wank stuff

8 09 2010
martin

I suppose a bogan would want to listen to Khe Sanh for the 1 trillionth time. A tasteful person would want to listen to Bow River or one of the other songs.

8 09 2010
Brimstone

as somebody who hasn’t grown up on it, Khe Sanh is the kinda heartfelt rock i dig

8 09 2010
martin

Well I guess it might be like you hearing Goodbye American Pie or something.

8 09 2010
martin

It’s a good song, but played to death is an understatement.

8 09 2010
Brimstone

yeah, i getcha

American Pie brings back very good, very specific memories for me, though

but yeah it took me ages to properly love Springsteen because he was so overplayed. once i started LISTENING i was like ‘this is the best thing ever’

to an American rock fan all the bands Aussies are sick of sound great. before i came here half my Yank friends sent me Living End tracks

8 09 2010
Sten

Since you’re an American, I can understand that. One of my pet hates is Bogans who go on about that song being so much a part of the Australian experience, when the only Australians even remotely close to the action were Canberra pilots flying air support for the Yanks on the ground.

8 09 2010
Simon - Glasser at Arms

I like Flame Trees. How embarrasment.

8 09 2010
Shirley M

I like one of their songs but I can’t think of what it is.

8 09 2010
Shirley M

Choirgirl.That’s the one. For shame. It’s just because it’s fun to do karaoke.

9 09 2010
Tombarina

Nope, not embarrassment.

Don Walker is one of the finest narrative songwriters Australia has produced, and Flame Trees is a brilliant encapsulation of returning to your small hometown with open eyes.

Some superb observations: “a young factory-out-of-worker”, for eg. “I’m happy just to sit here at a table with old friends, and see which one of us can tell the biggest lies.”

In Ian Moss, Chisel also boasted one of the best rock voices around (along with songwriting ability – see Bow River, and let’s say no more about Tucker’s Daughter). Plus the band featured that rarest of beasts – the multi-faceted drummer (Steve Preswich wrote Forever Now, When the War is Over, etc, and sang lovely harmonies).

It’s a bloody shame ‘Chisel’ is synonymous with Khe Sahn and Barnsie – there was a hell of a lot more going on there.

9 09 2010
vivisection

We try to forget Tuckers Daughter too…

9 09 2010
vivisection

I meant Telephone Booth. Am i having a stroke??

9 09 2010
Shirley M

This is what happens when one watches FiFi Box on the telly.

DON’T DO IT AGAIN.

9 09 2010
vivisection

The gummint should have warned me.

9 09 2010
Shirley M

The Gummint want you to watch, to stupid you down a bit.

I think the cure is a Bloody Mary.

9 09 2010
Tombarina

I don’t know about the stroke Vivi.

Can you see both your hands?

9 09 2010
vivisection

Bloody Gillard and her PC nanny state!!! Tryin to stupid me down. Me off all peeps. I’ll watch it next week to proof them me not getin ficker buy the minit.

9 09 2010
vivisection

Can see my hands as I wave them around like I just don’t care to Telephone Booth on a Highway!

8 09 2010
martin

Yeah. So the bogan could sing the line “last plane out of Sydney’s almost gone” and pretend that he was in nam and has had a charismatic and colourful life.

8 09 2010
Brimstone

Khe Sanh is also mentioned in Born in the USA

the place, not the song. but it’s a nice link between two working class rock anthems

god, i do sound like a wanker

8 09 2010
Tone

A simple one question bogan test: Which Chisels singer was better: Barnesy or Mossy? If you answered ‘Barnesy’, you’re a bogan. If you answered ‘Mossy’, you’re not.

8 09 2010
Peter

What if you answer Jon Stevens?

9 09 2010
JimmmyMick

Then you’re an idiot.

9 09 2010
James Hunter

Jimmmy Mick
Thats our “Pete Babe”

8 09 2010
Chairman Miaow

AC/DC have made a living out of recycling the same riff and drum pattern 68 times. I have to wait for the lyrics to know what the song is. And even then it’s debatable until the chorus. C’mon, bring it on Acca Dacca fanboys.

8 09 2010
martin

AC/DC is a bit like The Stones imo. They’ve only got about 10-20 good songs out of about 100, but when they hit it, they hit it good.

8 09 2010
Chairman Miaow

Now you gotta fight. The Stones have got a back catalogue every band on the planet would kill for. From Angie to Tops to Sweet Virginia, let alone rock classics like Gimme Shelter, Honky Tonk W and so on.

The true test of a song is how good other bands can make it sound. Even that pole dancer, fergie…

… so sweet. And respect to Fergie, she nails the Merry Clayton back ups.

8 09 2010
martin

Angie? Please. One of the most annoying songs ever.

But otherwise I’ll take your word for it I never got into the Stones much.

8 09 2010
Brimstone

Angie is amazing
almost every Stones song is amazing

8 09 2010
Sten

Paint it Black…

8 09 2010
clipper

The Stones made great tunes until ’74, then lost it. They still they put on a mean live show though.

9 09 2010
Mick

Just hearing the intro to Gimme Shelter makes the hairs on the back of my neck stand up.

Awesome song.

9 09 2010
Tombarina

Their best. That clickety-ratchet sound and swaggering, jangling guitar from Keef.
Love it long time.

9 09 2010
Mick

Tomba, many moons ago I walked into a pub in Rockhampton for a quick grog or two. They had this thing going that buy a drink and you get a request for a song on the video jutebox behind the bar. So I ask for Gimme Shelter.

The barmaid at the far end nearly snapped her neck turning to look at me. She told me later that I was quite possibly the only person in all of Rockhampton besides herself who would have heard of it.

Thank you Keef for a wonderful night in an awful place.

8 09 2010
Brimstone

i’m not a fanboy, and nobody claims they’re original. i just don’t understand disliking AC/DC. they’re a 100% solid rock band

8 09 2010
pb

i dislike them. they’re just uninteresting to me. i’m not a fan of shouty singing, either, so that doesn’t appeal, and like miaow, i find all their songs are pretty much the same.

8 09 2010
vivisection

I just remember Acca Dacca fans being the biggest bogans of the day where I grew up. They also liked Creedance Clearwater (whom I utterly loathe). As far as ACDC music goes, I see the appeal but the association with deadshits is too much for me. Similar with Chisel, Noiseworks, The Angels and Rose Tattoo, The Beatles and The Stones. I get it, but can’t embrace it.

8 09 2010
Brimstone

Creedance? they’re awesome. my friend put on a Creedence and Johnny Cash tribute night…. everyone singing along to Down on the Corner and Bad Moon Rising was amazing

i grew up on classic rock, so the stigma isn’t there

8 09 2010
vivisection

I’d be there for a Johnny Cash night.

8 09 2010
clipper

The American Recordings series Johnny Cash did was brilliant

9 09 2010
Tombarina

Cash’s cover of NIN’s Hurt, and the accompanying vid, is one of the most devastating things I’ve ever seen/heard.

Salutory example of stripping a deceptively good song back to its barest of bones, then infusing it with more regret, pain and self-loathing than one would think imaginable.

Masterful stuff.

9 09 2010
vivisection

His cover of Depeche Mode’s Personal Jesus is also exceptional.

9 09 2010
Shirley M

I’m personally very fond of his Rusty Cage cover.

I like everything about Johnny Cash, actually. Expect the bit about him being dead.

8 09 2010
Sten

Not so much an Acca Dacca fan, but I do enjoy Credence.

8 09 2010
Tone

At least AC/DC’s two riffs are better than John Butler’s two riffs.

9 09 2010
Bag O'Turnips

I admit that I’m partial to the Bon Scott era of Acca Dacca, but after Back In Black, forget it. Bon was a very charismatic singer with a powerful voice, which had subtle phrasing that most bogans could never appreciate, as well as a phenomenal stage presence coupled with a sly wit. “Rock And Roll Damnation” is a fine example of this, in my belief.

As for Chisels, I think it something of a pity that a band with the literate songwriting force of Don Walker and the dexterous guitar of Ian Moss was despoiled with the shrieks of Jimmy Barnes.

8 09 2010
Chairman Miaow
8 09 2010
Brimstone

i’ve never seen a Bert Newtown show but he CREEPS ME OUT. he’s like a sleazy small town mayor

8 09 2010
Simon - Glasser at Arms

A fun game for everyone – Spot the glaring error.

On Nein last night there was an advertisement for an ACA story.

It features some people who hid cameras in hotel rooms to get shots of people in showers, changing clothes etc and how shameful this all is invading peoples privacy etc. The feature of the story is they are going to play the footage taken in the rooms.

A vintage Vspy Vspy tshirt for the first person who can tell me where the error lies.

8 09 2010
vivisection

Putting the cameras in hotel rooms, clearly public showers at swiming pools and gyms would give a wider variety of bits to look at, at the same time. Amateur mistake.

8 09 2010
Simon - Glasser at Arms

Close but not quite.

8 09 2010
vivisection

Not having a “Richard Wilkins Presents” Special to release the footage in prime time?

8 09 2010
vivisection

Not filming it in 3D?

8 09 2010
Pandabater

The error was watching channel nein.

8 09 2010
Simon - Glasser at Arms

Topgear night!

8 09 2010
Pandabater

Another fckn repeat, BASTARDS!!!!!!

8 09 2010
common man

“spy vs spy”??

8 09 2010
common man

oops its not an error as such,its FUCKING IRONIC!!!

8 09 2010
Brent Palmer

Originally, the band was called Spy vs Spy, after the comic strip in MAD magazine. However, legal action by the mag forced them to alter the spelling to V.Spy V.Spy.

8 09 2010
Simon - Glasser at Arms

I was thinking an adults only special hosted by Bert and Richard Reid so they can show the rude bits.

9 09 2010
JimmmyMick

BUT THEY NEVER DO!

so you check it out on redtube instead 🙂

8 09 2010
pellicle

I often wonder if your site is an informal meeting ground for some of the commenters? (should such a word exist)

haven’t seen much mention of Bert Newton lately … although his son seems to be popular in the news, could be room for a “she had it coming cos she was getting lippy” thing that Bogans like to do

8 09 2010
SD

Welcome pellicle, I am afraid everyone has been far too busy chatting to say hullo!

I suppose that answers your Q.

8 09 2010
dave

Breaking news – the bogan’s role model may be out of a job. Fevola is set to be ditched from the Brisbane Lions after exposing himself to a woman at the club’s Family Day over the weekend. He is all class and consistently achieves the very high standard of etiquette that he sets for himself

8 09 2010
vivisection

I’m getting me a family and going to the next family day. Wish Grandma was alive, she would have liked an eyeful too.

8 09 2010
Shirley M

Oh Fev. You can rock out with your cock out, but on family day, put it away.

8 09 2010
vivisection

Brendan Fevola
Family Day Cock Shocker
Crying women and kids

8 09 2010
vivisection

bad haiku error above….. lost all ability to count in the excitement and romance of Fev’s latest adventures in good taste.

9 09 2010
Bag O'Turnips

A haiku does not strictly have to be contained to a 5-7-5 syllable count. So long as it is concise and has that little twist, it is haiku. And it is.

Well done, viv.

8 09 2010
Shirley M

I know that you’re proud of your schlong,
but dear Fev, I suggest that it’s wrong,
to unrequestedly show
it to any old ho,
IN YOUR JOCKS! That’s where it belongs.

8 09 2010
Shirley M

And before some pendant points out that unrequestedly is not a real word, I already know, and I don’t care.

8 09 2010
vivisection

I will use the word unrequestedly, unrequestedly in a show of support Shirley. At least once a day.

8 09 2010
Shirley M

The fact that you would show your support of my new word unrequestedly urequestedly by me, makes me feel a large amount of requestedly love toward you.

9 09 2010
vivisection

And I unrequestedly bless ya kind heart for it Shirley.

8 09 2010
common man

^^LIKE

8 09 2010
Sten

Brilliant as always, Shirley.

8 09 2010
8 09 2010
pb

love the suggestion it was a set up. i’m wondering how someone can possibly be set up to get their dick out.

8 09 2010
devil's advocate

The answer to that question could form the basis of a plot for two and a half men. Hell it could form a double-episode cliffhanger.

8 09 2010
chubbybloodfart

chubbybloodfart live from mount isa and off topic as ever.
I may have mistakenly referred to innisfail as the heart of Katter Kuntry, I was wrong. It is, in fact, the Isa.
For anyone who has never been here, you should really hurry up and completely avoid the place.
In the words of Paris Hilton’s gynaecologist “My God what a hole!”

now to read the post.

8 09 2010
common man

LOL.she also can fit a 10 gallon something somewhere else too

8 09 2010
Simon - Glasser at Arms

G’day Chubs and Edna.

8 09 2010
Peter

Mt Isa has already been made famous in the James Hunter classic, “I’ve Been Everywhere”
Indeed, Mt Isa is one of the two places he’s actually visited.

9 09 2010
Bag O'Turnips

Probably full of scrofulous denizens, like the hotel heiress’ hole.

Good to hear from you and Edna, as always. Hope the roadtrip is going along smoothly enough.

9 09 2010
Tombarina

Ah, the Isa. Can be distinguished from Townsville only by the presence of smokestacks, and a dearth of irukanji-infested waters.

The locals will tell you to head to the lookout for the best view of the place.

They’re wrong. The best view of that festering dump is in your rear vision mirror, as you drive out of town. At speed…..

8 09 2010
chubbybloodfart

bravo TBL.

play Khe Sanh ya caaaarnts!

ok
old school bogan
I’ll go away again.

8 09 2010
chubbybloodfart

g’day simon!
I never did thank you for playing vamos for my birthday.
thankyou.
hello everybody.

8 09 2010
James Hunter

all you TBL ers ;saterday 23 October 2010 , Revelation Close ,Thighes Hill (Newcastle) at the Club Rooms of the Life and Death MCC Me and Myself (with others) presenting highlights from my show, “Circus Bizarre ‘s” repertoire ,Dj , lingerie girls and hot band ,”Omega Red”. 7.00pm gates open we on stage around 8.30
All welcome Entry $15.00
So those who have seen our web site and made disparaging comments come and have the scales removed from your peepers. Those that have seen our web site and like what they see then dont miss this opertunity to see it in the real.
As most of the shows we do these days are private parties this open to all event is a great opertunity . This will not be a “Big Screen Presentation” as it were but although more low key “carney” on the back of a Tautliner for a stage there will be most all of the clasic “Circus Bizarre” acts.

9 09 2010
Sten

Man, I remember hearing Omega Red at the Duck’s Nuts while I was up there for a mate’s Bucks Night. I barely made it out alive, as a six-pack of knuckle-dragging, buck-toothed ferals (who I’m sure didn’t represent the good people of Newcastle as a whole) wanted to punch my head in for having the temerity to tell them off for insulting the local Gothic girls I was hanging out with at the time.

Good times, good times.

9 09 2010
The Quote Train

Nothing says bogan like Tiesto

9 09 2010
Mick

Totally off-topic but I don’t care. Tomorrow I go to the epicentre of boganity…the court house.

Jury duty for Mick and the chance to do some MaxXxtreme bogan study. I bet you all envy me now. No? I fully understand.

I feel dirty already.

9 09 2010
vivisection

I spent an entire day in the courthouse for my jury duty – totally excited about what boganic horrors I might encounter. Instead, I waited all day and no cases came up at all. It was like sitting at Centrelink for 8 hours. Shaee you missed the murderous swingers case – I would have taken the day off work if I knew that was coming up. I have to wait another year before i even eligible to be called up again.. Have fun and tell us all about it when you can.

9 09 2010
Mick

I’ve been away for a month so I don’t know if anything juicy is coming up. Last time I had the front page murder case.

I learnt from that one that Rupert is never going to be accused of employing journalists at his newspapers. Total sensationalist garbage that had no connection to the case at all. I think that may have been when the light bulb came on and I decided that being a bogan is quite wrong and maybe thinking about things is the way to go.

I guess I owe Rupert. I feel dirty again.

9 09 2010
Tombarina

Take two Kerry O’Briens, wash it down with a swig of Andrew Denton and have a nice lie down.

You’ll feel better. And clean.

9 09 2010
distinguished gentrleman

But how could a party end with other than “left my heart to sappers round Khesan”, and the obligatory argument whether it is a train or plane which is the last mode of transport out of Sydney? (I know that trains can’t fly, but the Bogan who first heard train in the lyrics is loath to change their opinion…………

9 09 2010
distinguished gentleman

Do’h, spelt my name wrong……………

9 09 2010
distinguished gentleman

moderated post on it’s way I suppose

9 09 2010
distinguished gentleman

reminds me of the recurring get together I had to endure up until recently when the host and his best mate had a falling out over one supposedly having horizontal relations with the others partner……….these two where the main players in this party group so thankfully that get together is over with…………before you ask, I had to do the obligatory family member so I have to be there task. Anyways, the dreaded lap top was always propped on the bar loaded with nothing but classic rock, 70’s soft rock, country pop (aaahhhhh). As the guests got drunker the mouse clicking became more frequent. I then had to endure the first minute of All Right Now, KheSan, Dr Hook, The Eagles, and country pop shite…….I tried putting on the hillbilly band Hayseed Dixie (the best ACDC cover band ever) but some people where truly offended, couldn’t see the humor in it, and things nearly turned violent. Unbelievable

9 09 2010
Tombarina

Oh sweet baby Jesus.

I can understand why people would get monumentally drunk at this get-together – it would almost be like some sort of protective shield against the warbling evil that is Dr Hook.

I’ll bet some Garth Brooks was thrown into the mix, too.

That’s truly f&%$d.

9 09 2010
clipper

Hayseed Dixie had to change their name from AC Dixie by humourless execs. Love that last song on the Album ‘Big Balls’, very funny.

9 09 2010
distinguished gentleman

Tombarina, yes, Garth was there………as well as Shania, and Shooter Jennings

10 09 2010
chubbybloodfart

no BBW?
as a functional political illiterate I have no idea what just happened.

10 09 2010
Mick

Yes, if nothing comes up soon I’m either gonna have to wash my car or sit in the pool.

10 09 2010
SD

TBL, Brisbane Party Boy – mad props from me too esp for the Ed Hardy entry!

10 09 2010
Mick

I work with 50 Brisbane Party Boys.

They’re sad but funny at the same time.

10 09 2010
Shirley M

I have acquainted myself with BNEpartyboy on Twitter and have set myself the personal mission of confirming or denying his actuality.

10 09 2010
vivisection

alright, please explain – who or what is Brisbane party boy and how did this start? Intrigued.

10 09 2010
Shirley M

http://bnepartyboy.tumblr.com/

TBL discovered this dude and tweeted it. He’s awesome.

22 09 2010
BNEPARTYBOY

Oh I’m real…sometimes I think I’m to real for Brisbane. They just can’t handle what I’m putting down and they definatley can’t handle my 12 inches of dude fillet. But fuck the haters I’ll keep partying on.

23 09 2010
Shirley M

Oh I truly hope you are real, dude. There should be more like you.

10 09 2010
Sheree McDonald

Very good. I’m waiting for TBL to write up on those “My Family” stickers that are popping up on the back of every “suv” on the Gold Coast (like your family: 1. can be defined by some crude stick figures; and 2. what makes the bogans think we want to know how many bogan kids they’ve bred?) and the “As seen on TV” label on products, as if, wow, it’s on TV, it MUST work!

10 09 2010
Tombarina

Those stickers are doing my head in. And they’re grossly misrepresentative.

I can think of at least one cases where the picture-perfect family’s sticker-beladen 4WD should more accurately be plastered with Dad giving Mum a hiding, Mum shagging the soccer coach, and their horned kids setting fire to the cat.

We’ve decided that we’ll get My Family stickers when there’s a pissed-off-looking woman seeking wine, a bloke beating up Kevin Rudd and a giant holographic teenager who, depending on what angle you’re looking, is either eating or sleeping.

24 09 2010
Stopitnow

I like to call pub-club hybrids ‘plubs’. They are awful.

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