#181 – Sarcasm

11 10 2010

Thanks to years of laughing at its own jokes, and also at the jokes of others which are similar to its own, the bogan is well aware that it is funny. In a distressing chicken and egg validation manoeuvre, the bogan knows that its humour is similar to that of Two and a Half Men, which is a bogan-treasured sitcom, thus placing the bogan’s jokes at the forefront of world humour. If asked to define its great sense of humour, the bogan will enthusiastically inform you that it is “funny and really sarcastic”.

Sarcasm was first recorded in English in 1579, in an annotation to The Shepheardes Calender by Edmund Spenser. By early 1580, Spenser’s peers had declared that sarcasm was the lowest form of humour yet devised, and that he should be hanged at dawn. 430 years later, the bogan’s grotesque love affair with sarcasm shows no sign of abating.

While it can be said that sarcasm requires no creativity, wit, or insight, that is not to say that being sarcastic does not place considerable demands on the bogan. After all, the bogan knows that in order to really nail sarcasm, it must simultaneously roll its eyes, inject an up-down lilt into its extended vowels, AND verbalise the opposite thing to what is on its mind. If it only manages to generate two out of these three phenomena, nearby bogans may incorrectly form the opinion that they are not witnessing comic genius unfolding.

This humour tightrope is known to create anxiety in the bogan. What if it can’t verbalise the opposite of its thoughts at the same speed at which it can roll its eyes and lilt? With this concern in mind, the bogan will studiously hunker down to hours of Today Tonight and A Current Affair per week, in order to whittle down its opinions on the full spectrum of bogan conversation topics to three unambiguous words or less.

From time to time, the bogan will misappropriate Alanis Morrissette’s misappropriation of irony, and allege that in addition to being funny and sarcastic, it is also funny and ironic. If asked to define irony, the bogan will panic. If its initial explanation of “it’s like rain on your wedding day” is rejected due to its tunelessness and inherent untruth, the bogan will scuttle back to what it knows to work. “Duh, I was being saaaaaarcastiiiiiiic”. The bogan likes sarcasm.


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191 responses

11 10 2010
Robbie

well isn’t it ironic… don’t you think?

11 10 2010
Fiona of Toorak

LOL. I queefed.

11 10 2010
Fiona of Toorak, bestower of largesse

LOL. Fail. The avatar confirms you as an impostor. Still, I suppose I can’t blame you for wanting to be me, even if only here.

11 10 2010
Nelson Esq

Oh Fi, did you ever consider that the ‘other’ FoT was being sarcastic? I think they got you…NOT!!

11 10 2010
Brimstone

pretty ironic this is being painted as a bogan thing when one of the most prolific commentators here is an ironic gimmick poster

one could say that sarcasm/sarcastic irony is THE modern form of humor, from The Simpsons onward. see also: The Daily Show/Colbert Report, hardly bastions of boganic thought

i would have thought bogans weren’t smart enough for sarcasm

This is shit. Now even we can’t tell if you’re being sarcastic, or just didn’t read the post…TBL

11 10 2010
Mick

They’re smart enough to carry off poor attempts at sarcasm. That’ll do me.

11 10 2010
Shirley M

Hehehehe I was wondering the same thing, TBL.

11 10 2010
Brimstone

i did read it, and i’m not being sarcastic

11 10 2010
James, anti Anti-Intellectual

In that case, what you have identified is not irony.

11 10 2010
Pendant

But the comment itself is quite ironic

12 10 2010
Lord Charos

Is that sarcasm?

11 10 2010
devil's advocate

Colbert is not being sarcastic, he is being an over-the-top caricature of what the left imagines the far right to be. And because he is a pretty funny guy, he usually nails it.

The Simpsons is a situational comedy, and much of its jokes do arise from the ridiculous situations the characters find themselves in. I don’t see any excessive reliance on sarcasm there.

In terms of gimmick posters, there is a fair amount of irony in there, depending on how you interpret it. If you think it’s an attempt to give a humourous portrayal of how high society views the bogan, then of course it fails miserably, because of the lack of understanding by the author of how the upper classes actually live.

If, however, you view it through the prism of an aspirational bogan attempting and failing to envisage how the upper classes live, and in doing so betraying how bogan the author actually is, then it can be pretty funny and ironic – ironic, because in attempting to look all clarsy ‘n that, the bogan is actually painting a vivid image of its boganity.

In essence, it’s all up to the reader as to which of the two interpretations they choose.

11 10 2010
pb

the funniest thing with colbert is that there are a sizeable number of people on the right who think he’s genuine.

11 10 2010
devil's advocate

I’m not sure whether I don’t want to believe you, or whether I just plain don’t believe you. What supporting information can you provide around this?

I’m incredulous.

11 10 2010
Simon - Glasser at Arms

Evidence = Americans.

11 10 2010
devil's advocate

I’ve been to the US, various times and locations, and only ever heard discussions of Stuart and Colbert from like-minded lefties. Whatever contact I had with righties (and there were isolated but intense episodes) did not involve any mention of these type of shows.

11 10 2010
pb

there’s always the fact that dubya got him to speak at the white house correspondents’ dinner: http://politicalhumor.about.com/od/stephencolbert/a/colbertbush.htm
there’s this survey:

http://news.cnet.com/8301-17852_3-10232295-71.html

i’ve seen actual interviews with ultra conservative guests who clearly had no clue, but can’t find them just now.

11 10 2010
devil's advocate

pb, your ideas are intrigueing to me, and I wish to subscribe to your newsletter.

11 10 2010
pb

this is the woman i was trying to find – orly taitz, crazy birther lawyer: http://www.colbertnation.com/the-colbert-report-videos/229691/july-28-2009/womb-raiders—orly-taitz

11 10 2010
11 10 2010
Nelson Esq

On The Simpsons Homer often uses sarcasm when trying to make a point. He even uses a sarcastic tone. By having a ‘stupid’ character use sarcasm, on could concluded that the witers of The Simpsons believe that sarcasm is the lowest form of wit!

11 10 2010
Mick

Lisa “I’m going to become a vegetarian”
Homer “Does that mean you’re not going to eat any pork?”
“Yes”
“Bacon?”
“Yes Dad”
“Ham?”
“Dad all those meats come from the same animal”
“Right Lisa, some wonderful, magical animal!”

11 10 2010
pb

“ooh look! i’m making people happy! i’m the magical man, from happy land, living in a gum drop house on lollipop lane!”

11 10 2010
Stapler

You said “view it through the prism”. You probably also like to use phrases such as “paradigm shift”.

Tosser.

12 10 2010
Benny Hill

These days sarcasm is the greatest form of flattery.

12 10 2010
devil's advocate

Pfft. If “prism” is tosser, I don’t know how to describe the repeated and increasingly irrellevant references to a made-up degree in a made-up discipline.

11 10 2010
miss dahl

@brimstone – you are correct in thinking the bogans aren’t smart enough for sarcasm. In fact, for bogans, sarcasm is a collective term. To them, universal truth and proven facts are usually referred to as “sarcasm” as well as words uttered by anyone with an IQ of over 155 (they are referred to as “smart-arses”).

11 10 2010
TheBattlersPrince

I’d tend to lower that IQ score to 100 or above when applied to ‘smart-arses’…or anyone with a basic grasp of logical conversation and humour…

31 03 2011
M-Pathetic ... NOT!

A person with an IQ over 155 [regardless of which scale is used] is a smart-arse to EVERYONE Dahl! (…think da Vinci; Einstein; Newton; Michelangelo; Gates; Hawking; Tesla…)

Though from some folk, i.e. ‘lesser’ smart-arses, it’s a form of respect…:)

11 10 2010
Shirley M

When I started reading this post I was unsure if it was a valid claim, due to the fact that my bogan brother and his even more so bogan lady friend regularly fail to pick up on sarcastic remarks I make. Then I realised it’s because I don’t do the defining vocal characteristics or roll my eyes. I can’t believe how STUPID I’ve been!

11 10 2010
pb

you need to have a recording of your own laugh track to take along with you – that’s how they’ll know when to laugh, as that’s how two and a half men does it.

11 10 2010
Shirley M

You’re right, pb. I’ll know better in future.

11 10 2010
Tone

Just get a laugh track sample and upload it to your mobile phone. I’d also add ‘wooooo!’ and ‘oooooooh’ tracks to cover those one lines where a simple dose of canned laughter is inadequate.

11 10 2010
Bag O'Turnips

That’s right folks.

The difference between the bogan and the rest of us is that the bogan has no handle on the understated art of subtlety. The bogue cannot let a choice voce sotto comment slip out deftly without any form of visual or verbal punctuation.

They often do not realise when a smart remark is made at them when there are no obvious cues to direct their response, which sometimes means that what many of us would take as a subtle yet incisive insult, would have them respond with an utterly bemused “huh?”, going right over their heads, while you just quietly realise that yup, you’ve just completely bamboozled them, wasting an otherwise serviceable witticism.

We don’t need no education…

11 10 2010
Bogan In Laws

Case in point –

I once asked a bogan in law if they would like ‘some cheese with their whine’ after listening to them complain, at length, about the cost of their newest tattoo (which was their surname, in Gothic script, from shoulder to shoulder).

It took me 10 minutes to explain the joke. Even then they still didn’t get it, and my subtle insult (albeit a corny one) was lost.

16 10 2010
XXX

I hate to say this, but I am married to the King of Bogans and his family are even worse. On a Qantas flight, the very camp attendant was watching my overweight hubby trying to open his bag of peanuts and made the comment “if sir can’t open them sir can’t eat them, can he?” I got the meaning immediately, hubby just could not understand the rudeness in the comment, no matter how hard I tried to explain it.

11 10 2010
InnerCityGirl

So only bogans are sarcastic???

11 10 2010
Shirley M

Yeaaaaah. Only bogans are sarcastic.

11 10 2010
Mick

You didn’t roll your eyes.

11 10 2010
Shirley M

Man, I really need to get the hang of that bit.

11 10 2010
James, anti Anti-Intellectual

In the absence of Pendant, if you were referring to the old mode of execution, one does not get hung, but hanged.

True that. TBL

11 10 2010
Pendant

Seems that everyone is beating me to the pendantry lately. Now that you’ve got a taste for how gosh darned fun it is I’m afraid I’m going to have to kill you.

11 10 2010
SD

It’s no fun, you can have your job back.

11 10 2010
Fiona of Toorak, bestower of largesse

LOL. Actually, both forms are correct although “hanged” is more usual. Also, “hanged” can ONLY be used to refer to a person. Typically one of the lesser people who met a fairly typical end for them, one supposes.

11 10 2010
TheBattlersPrince

Damn all forms of tense!

11 10 2010
Fiona of Toorak, bestower of largesse

LOL. No, as per below, not “true that”, to reuse your low vernacular.

11 10 2010
Fiona of Carlton

I’m surpsied you didn’t point out how their brand of sarcasm and irony extends as far as Wayne’s World – NOT!!!!

11 10 2010
TheBattlersPrince

That or “only joking!”…which they believe can excuse any inappropriate behaviour they display, mostly in public, involving copious amounts of alcohol and a double dare being invoked…

11 10 2010
Mick

It’s used quite often in the workplace as well. Usually as a defense mechanism. They can spurt out any outdated racist, mysogynistic views and not have to answer a case.

It’s the only thing between them and their mates at the Centrelink office.

11 10 2010
TheBattlersPrince

You mean the ones in the Centrelink line right?

11 10 2010
Mick

Not really. When one spends a lot of time in an establishment everyone becomes friends.

Mush like the bar staff at the local and myself.

11 10 2010
Bec

I too love that one, Mick.

1. Make a tasteless, pointless and irrelevant comment.
2. React negatively when comment receives the dearth of humour it deserves.
3. Possessor of aforementioned crap sense of humour then castigates others for being humourless, holds the position that a joke is a protected form of speech immune from criticism or consequence.
4. Decries how “political correctness” has gone mad, in the process confusing good manners and social niceties with being interned in a North Korean labour camp.
5. I cry while drinking.

26 10 2010
XXX

Speaking of inappropriate behaviour, I made the dreadful mistake of mixing my family (two older brothers are doctors and younger brother is an investment banker) with hubby’s bogan family. It was a BBQ and there was an assortment of both families there. My older brother was married to a professional ballet dancer at the time who had put great time and effort into her appearance. The bogans in attendance thought it was hilarious to throw fully dressed attendees into the swimming pool whether they liked it or not. Ballet dancer sister-in-law was tossed in and proceeded to throw a major hissy fit (absolutely warranted) to which the bogans all proceeded to say that they were “only joking” and “where was her sense of humour?” I very nearly resorted to violence that day. I refuse to have mixed family get togethers now.

11 10 2010
Mick

A bunch of us apprentices got together and decided we would teach a Turkish born TA how to be sarcastic. He was very excited to learn a new skill. Decided to use it the very next day at the races. Unfortunately he earned a smack in the head for his efforts.

Obviously we didn’t explain the long vowels and eye-rolling well enough. Mustapha, if you’re reading this I’m ever so sorry.

11 10 2010
Bag O'Turnips

He can do far worse than receive his tuition here, Mick!

11 10 2010
brad

amduk

11 10 2010
Alex

Isn’t saying the opposite of what you mean irony; with sarcasm being more related to the tone of delivery? Doesn’t this make the behaviour you describe both sarcastic and ironic anyway? Is that the point you’re making?

11 10 2010
hel

I could get shot down here but as I understand it irony is undertaking something for one outcome and the outcome ending up being utterly the opposite to the intention. Hence, Alanis Morrissette, you are a tool. Now getting a rain maker for your wedding and setting the entire event up to be held in a rain storm and THEN it rains on your wedding day, I think that might be closer to irony, but I’m a bit vague on this.

11 10 2010
Shirley M

What you describe is situational irony. What alex described is verbal irony. There’s all kinds of irony. Sarcasm does not necessarily employ irony, but often does.

11 10 2010
SD

“TBL OMG, it’s so (eye roll) sarcastic.” (after it has been featured on TT and ACA and dubbed a satirical blog).

Is the TBL post on sarcasm per se? As usual, I thought it was about bogans attempting sarcasm and being chuffed about it.

Though I do wonder if the misappropriation of the misappropriation of irony unintentionally makes the bogan an employer of irony :-)

11 10 2010
Shirley M

One could say that the bogan lives in a constant state of dramatic irony, especially now that we have TBL to point out the discrepancies between bogan reality and actual reality.

11 10 2010
Fiona of Toorak, bestower of largesse

LOL. Shirley dear, I believe you are somewhat musically inclined.

Perhaps you’d care to lead us all in a rendition of Alanis’ “Ironic” with new, bogan friendly lyrics?

11 10 2010
Shirley M

Aren’t the existing lyrics already bogan friendly?

I tell you what, if the group contributes to the rewriting of the lyrics, I’ll do my best to record a version of it for you.

11 10 2010
Fiona of Toorak, bestower of largesse

LOL. That sounds fair.

Considering the audience, the ironic content of the lyrics need not be high – in fact, the lower the better.

As is my wont, I shall begin proceedings:

An old bogan turned ninety-eight,
He won the pokies at the pub, but didn’t the next day (… sadly).
It’s a black fly in your locally brewed foreign beer,
It’s getting glassed by the c*nt, who brought it to you here.
And isn’t it ironic… don’t you think?
.
.
.

11 10 2010
Shirley M

Excellent work.

It’s like nobody winning the first AFL final
It’s like getting hitched, but your wife won’t anal
It’s like an Asian chick, who’s not hot but feral
Who would have thought? It figures.

11 10 2010
Fiona of Toorak, bestower of largesse

Mr. Cheap Skate was afraid to fly first class,
He kissed his kids goodbye and did his missus up the arse.
He waited a whole three hours to take that Jetstar flight,
And as the plane landed in Bali, he thought “well isn’t this nice…”
And isn’t it ironic… don’t you think
.
.
.

11 10 2010
Simon - Glasser at Arms

It’s like drinking Boost to lose weight
It’s like looking up to Brendan Fevola
It’s like Ikea in a Grand sitting room
It’s like Hey, Hey on Wednesday

Kind of ironic don’t ya think.

11 10 2010
Shirley M

Wonderful. I think that’s enough material for me to do an abridged version. There’s no way I can put myself through the pain of attempting the song in its entirety.

11 10 2010
Fiona of Toorak, bestower of largesse

LOL. Oh, how wonderful it will be. I’m quite beside myself at the amusement we’re about to have bestowed upon us.

11 10 2010
Simon - Glasser at Arms

Speaking of amusement Hey Hey is coming back on Saturday. God I wish I was being sarcastic.

11 10 2010
Shirley M

Ok kids, here it is. If you want to watch it, do so today because I’ll probably delete it tomorrow. It’s pretty terrible. I lost my voice last week and still haven’t fully recovered. Also Simon, I had to rework your verse for timing and rhyming reasons, so I hope you don’t mind.

http://www.twitvid.com/IWS8Q

11 10 2010
Fiona of Toorak, bestower of largesse

LOL. Oh how splendid. The wonderful result of a wonderful collaboration: my high brow idea and your workman-like musicianship.

11 10 2010
Simon - Glasser at Arms

You are the maestro Shirl. Don’t delete too soon as I can’t watch till I get home tonight.

11 10 2010
SD

Good work, Shirl! I might be tempted to revisit Ironic.

11 10 2010
Shirley M

I would advise against it SD. I had to revisit it because I had no idea how the verses went, and it was even worse than I’d remembered. What a vomitus film clip!

11 10 2010
SD

Advice taken – particularly since I was driven mad by it when a bulimic cousin played it over and over..I think she was kind of a poster girl for girls with eating disorders….

11 10 2010
Tombarina

That’s goin’ STRAIGHT to the pool room. Cracker!

11 10 2010
Simon - Glasser at Arms

Great work Shirl. I fully approve of your rebooting of my lyrical contribution.

11 10 2010
pb

that was great, shirley.

13 10 2010
Fiona from Carlton

LOL

11 10 2010
Bogan In Laws

The best explanation I have ever found is here

http://theoatmeal.com/comics/irony

11 10 2010
Alex

Very nice, thank you.

11 10 2010
Notorious

Very good. I like ‘inspiring massive threads of raging idiots on the internet to debate whether something is ironic or not’
Sounds like this comments section right now

11 10 2010
Mick

Isn’t that the point of today’s post? That our bogan cousins have no idea what irony is yet attempt to use it in their usual nasty way?

11 10 2010
Shirley M

That’s pretty much how I read it.

31 03 2011
M-Pathetic ... NOT!

Very nearly Hel, but still more ‘coincidence’ than ‘irony’…

…if the wedding was held in a desert in the middle of a severe drought…THAT would be ironic – – you need to have the qualifier of ‘rain not being expected’ to make it valid…

…our good friend from The Lobotomised States of AmeriKKKa describes it well…

http://www.sense.net/~blaine/funstuff/carlin.html

11 10 2010
Fiona of Toorak, bestower of largesse

LOL. When the opposite of what one would logically expect from the preceding events occurs, the situation is said to be ironic. Of course, the fact that I need to define it for everyone here is not ironic, as I have a higher degree in the Classics.

11 10 2010
Notorious

To paraphrase the oatmeal (as linked above) you’re just trying to make yourself look smart. So shut your useless pie hole and find something better to do.

11 10 2010
Fiona of Toorak, bestower of largesse

LOL. Oh look, it’s the notorious P.I.G.

11 10 2010
Simon - Glasser at Arms

Notorious can’t do sarcasm. Ironic huh.

11 10 2010
devil's advocate

However the fact that you think you need to define it for everyone here is deeply ironic, given that just about every poster here has demonstrated literary prowess far exceeding your meagre efforts.

31 03 2011
Gold Coaster

Ah, trolls.

11 10 2010
Pendant

Top post today TBL. The unfortunate manner in which ‘sarcasm’ is treated by the bogue collective is a pet hate of mine. Often it seems that once they get the bright idea to deploy sarcasm it’s a switch that cannot be undone for the remainder of the conversation (or the whole day in the case of some coworkers). Also a great post because it’s brought out some undercover bogues in the comments, always good to see.

Kudos too for linking TT to ACA and vice versa. I was thinking of commenting that you should do that a while ago but figured it wouldn’t be the same if someone had to tell you to do it

11 10 2010
JimC

Whenever I heard of sarcasm I can;t help but think of that episode of FATHER TED where someopne is introduced as “the most sarcastic priest in Ireland…”

Then I laugh heartily to myself.

11 10 2010
peterofkensington

Sarcasm is not always the lowest form of humour, as demonstrated by sarcastic geniuses such as Oscar Wilde, Groucho Marx, TBL, Woody Allen…

However, I never attempt it. It requires too much subtlety.

11 10 2010
hel

Things bogans don’t like: discussions about context of language and vernacular. This post will filter out the bogans who read this, perhaps for the irony, as no bogan worth their year ten leaving certificate would have the time to debate the tenses of hung or hanged. Awesome post (I’m not rolling my eyes)

11 10 2010
lol-plates

I almost recieved an N award in HSC english (maths was better) and I now write policy, does that qualify as irony?

11 10 2010
Fiona of Toorak, bestower of largesse

LOL. Considering your writing style, it qualifies as tragedy.

11 10 2010
lol-plates

Most non english speaking people can write better than I can. Hell I even spell my name wrong. Sucks to be in the communications division that edits my work.

11 10 2010
SD

Re your editors its OK, people with a higher degree in classics need to employed somewhere.

11 10 2010
Fiona of Toorak, bestower of largesse

LOL. Ew, employment?

For those of us with higher degrees in the Classics who are unfortunate enough to need to find gainful employment, the Classics department of a quality university is really the only place to be.

12 10 2010
James, anti Anti-Intellectual

Indeed. Those departments are packed with the undereducated and unpublished.

11 10 2010
lol-plates

Thats true. Kinda sucks being a maths boy in a writing environment.

11 10 2010
Ash - Corporate Lawyer cum Lingerie Model

Bogans love their own sarcasm, they just can’t see it from others.

11 10 2010
Loftie

Sarcasm and Irony are great…
Especially for those who don’t understand it very well…
(making Sarcasm and Irony work together like a can of Jim Bean and a packet of Horizon 50’s)

Not sure if this link will work – but damn I’ve tried…
Saw this on the way home and just couldn’t resist sharing it…
[IMG]http://i268.photobucket.com/albums/jj23/loftiemax/42e4985c.jpg[/IMG]

A CHEVODORE – with an ironic tribue to TBL…

Epic….. :)

11 10 2010
Loftie

Just use the actual link – the [IMG] code tags do not work…

11 10 2010
lol-plates

Sigh a bowtie on a 6 cyl falcodore. Looks like a VY so a buick badge might be more appropriate.

11 10 2010
lol-plates

Or really a much more appropriate badge would be opel or vauxhall, seems as though that is where the commodore came from.

11 10 2010
Loftie

I guess the Irony was the numberplate – ???

11 10 2010
Simon - Glasser at Arms

Sarcastic prick.

11 10 2010
Mick

What? Where?

I didn’t see any eye-rolling…

11 10 2010
Simon - Glasser at Arms

*Insert mp3 canned laughter*

11 10 2010
lol-plates

Maybe TBL owners can’t afford a 6 year old family beater…maybe thats the irony?

*Crickets*

11 10 2010
Fiona of Toorak, bestower of largesse

LOL. What sort of car is that??? The number plates are Victorian but I’ve never seen such a monstrosity on the roads.

11 10 2010
Loftie

Fiona my dear… your graceful behind would never have been close to sitting on the seat of such a ‘monstrosity’…

I believe the vehicles’ that you would frequent would be trimmed in such materials as cashmere, deer hide, and perhaps the rare infant whale leather…

And your car(s) certainly would not have CHEV badges…
I’d imagine a sculpture of your naked self, taking the pose similar to Kate Winslet from the ‘Titanic’ movie…

Am I close???

11 10 2010
Simon - Glasser at Arms

And more like Reese Witherspoon Loftie.

11 10 2010
Fiona of Toorak, bestower of largesse

LOL. Quite. #blush

11 10 2010
Bag O'Turnips

Having an Aussie Swazi adhered to the window of a current-style Conformadore with a Chevrolet badge is irony writ large. Especially given that the VE is in fact designed, engineered and built wholly in Australia, first model since th venerable HQ-HZ-WB series to have that distinction.

Aussie Pride indeed.

11 10 2010
Fiona of Toorak, bestower of largesse

LOL. Close, yes. Ermine, however.

11 10 2010
Mick

Totally irrelevant but I shall still attempt a segue…

This saturday night I have been invited for drinks and nibblies at a friends house. There shall also be another person there who has an ‘exciting new business proposition’ to lay on us. My newfound status as CUB gets me a lot of these offers.

I’m gonna go for the grog. However, I still think I shall need some sort of irony deflection shield. Any McGyver types out there who can assist me in making one?

11 10 2010
Fiona of Toorak, bestower of largesse

LOL. I sense a Scamway pitch in your near future…

11 10 2010
Simon - Glasser at Arms

Sounds like Amway Mick, you are soooo lucky. What you do is keep asking them if it is Amway. You will get strong denial and deflection of the conversation. This may help. Otherwise hope they have good grog.

11 10 2010
lol-plates

Suggest investing in a holdings company which is owned by you which is really a bank account in some pacific island?

11 10 2010
Simon - Glasser at Arms

Say you know a Nigerian prince who has a counter proposition.

11 10 2010
Mick

Is that irony?

11 10 2010
Simon - Glasser at Arms

Depends if you roll your eyes or not I think.

11 10 2010
Mick

Noooooo, that’s saaaarcasm!

*rolls eyes*

11 10 2010
Simon - Glasser at Arms

But whenever I hear Alanis’ song my eyes roll.

(did I get the possesive right there pendant or Fi)

11 10 2010
Fiona of Toorak, bestower of largesse

LOL. Yes you did. Clever boy.

11 10 2010
Simon - Glasser at Arms

*Blush*

11 10 2010
Fiona of Toorak, bestower of largesse

LOL. Socialising with your betters has been of great benefit to you.

11 10 2010
Simon - Glasser at Arms

True.

11 10 2010
Fiona of Toorak, bestower of largesse

LOL. Speaking of, where’s James Hunter?

11 10 2010
devil's advocate

Amway isn’t actually a scam so much as a rubbish business idea. If you have ever observed this crap in action, the hourly rate works out to far, far below minimum wage. Of course, “below” in this context includes negative numbers.

I’m not prepared to disclose how it was that I came to observe it, but this is my view.

11 10 2010
Simon - Glasser at Arms

So your saying selling overpriced groceries for small commisions which you split in a pyramid form is not a quick way to get rich. Surely you jest DA.

11 10 2010
Mick

I think you’re all being too quick to judge. The gent in question is visiting from the Gold Coast and to my knowledge nothing sinister or dishonest has ever come from there.

11 10 2010
Simon - Glasser at Arms

White Shoes dude.

11 10 2010
Mick

I stand corrected.

11 10 2010
Simon - Glasser at Arms

You were being sarcastic huh.

11 10 2010
Mick

Well, there was no rolling of eyes.

It’s all getting a bit much for me. Time to stand in the garden for a while.

11 10 2010
devil's advocate

It’s not a quick way to get rich because it never works out like that. An attempted scam is not a scam.

Bernie Madoff, Charles Ponzi, Henry Kaye, these people are scammers because they succeed (even if they get caught in the end). Amway is a scam in terms of getting people to work for free, but it’s not a scam in the sense that any benefits are flowing to the participants.

11 10 2010
Ash - Corporate Lawyer cum Lingerie Model

I can’t, but I do suggest not touching the grog until you’re about to leave before throwing it back like a good bogan.

11 10 2010
Edward

Edmund Spencer is implicated ? I’m crestfallen, “Epithalmnion”, though not one of my favourite poems, is nevertheless one I admire.

11 10 2010
Dave

As entertaining as this was, all I took away from it is “The bogan is fucking dumb”

11 10 2010
Pandabater

Bogans are complaining because yesterday channel 7 kept interupting the advertising covered cars racing around the advertising sign covered track to show other advertisements. Is that “irony”?

11 10 2010
Fiona of Toorak, bestower of largesse

LOL. That may well be the single greatest comment (from a poster other than me) EVAH!

11 10 2010
Simon - Glasser at Arms

No need to be sarcastic Fi.

11 10 2010
Fiona of Toorak, bestower of largesse

LOL. *eyeroll*

11 10 2010
Pandabater

I was feeling special,
until I saw the “EVAH”

11 10 2010
Fiona of Toorak, bestower of largesse

LOL. I was merely trying to use the low vernacular of the lesser people. Perhaps I haven’t quite figured it out as yet.

11 10 2010
Pandabater

Thanks Fiona, as discussed on an earlier occasion we bogans like certanty & I took your use of the low vernacular as intended sarcasm as I would not expect such language from someone as yourself. If I was mistaken I humbly appologise & thank you.

11 10 2010
Fiona of Toorak, bestower of largesse

LOL. Quite right. I accept the implied criticism and shall attempt to maintain my lofty (*ahem*) disdain more consistently.

11 10 2010
Pandabater, greatest comment EVAH!

LOL

11 10 2010
Simon - Glasser at Arms

Panda, that looks very cool. *no sarcasm implied*

11 10 2010
Pandabater

Just thought I would try it on.

11 10 2010
Simon - Glasser at Arms

Leave it up.

11 10 2010
Pandabater

One can only be “bestowed” to use such an honour.

11 10 2010
Simon - Glasser at Arms

True,

Fiona, would you like to do some bestowing?

11 10 2010
lol-plates

At least the noisy four wheeled ads were not flogging beard dye… I find it odd that most people that watch any sport (motor racing is not a sport even though I love it) are never in any shape to compete in it even at a sunday arvo amature level.

11 10 2010
Mick

A beer gut is essential for resting your beer on when you need both hands to get a car around a corner at high speeds.

11 10 2010
lol-plates

I really dislike watching sport on the telly, the ads make me want to rub my face with an angle grinder.
Although the only time you get to see male hair dye ads is durring sport, damn they are bad.
Alcohol advertising should not be allowed near racing cars.
Speaking of irony… bogan icons such as Peter Brock and Angus Young were tea totalers and in Peter’s case a vegetarian and had New Age beliefs that crystals would make his cars faster.

11 10 2010
Bag O'Turnips

…but don’t tell them that, especially while they’re perusing the Acca Dacca shotglasses on display at Smokemart, or gnawing upon a steak sanger whilst viewing a compilation of Brockie Bathurst victories on their 3D!!! plasma in the media room of their McMansion.

11 10 2010
lol-plates

The dangerous amount of alcohol consumed up on the top sections of the mountain is sadening. I had the misfortune of wanting to head up the top to skyline where me and my GF (now my wife) got serverley harrassed. :(

11 10 2010
lol-plates

Man my spelling is good today :)

11 10 2010
Brimstone

WTF? i was happier before i knew Angus didn’t drink

12 10 2010
Edward

This may explain why 1) he is alive and 2) is the only founding member who remains capable of keeping up with the physical demands of performing in shows night after night, for months on end.

God, I hope I’m not wrong about the current roster line-up.

12 10 2010
Edward

Damn, tautology.

11 10 2010
Nelson Esq

In a further case of irony, the box of crystals Brock fitted to his road cars was called the Polariser…

11 10 2010
pb

speaking of male hair dye ads, my favourite is the new ‘touch of grey’ so the guy can pretend he’s george clooney.

12 10 2010
hel

“We needs his experience”
“But he';s got so much energy!”
“Why don’t we have both!?”

My favourite bit is at the end when the girl playing his new “boss” who is young enough to be his daughter, leads him off with a suggestive hand to the arm saying “I’ve got big plans for you”

Every male bogan across the country now wants to be an executive with grey hair as apparently they will get below the desk blow jobs, or at the very least a “wristy” before 10am coffee break everyday.

12 10 2010
Simon - Glasser at Arms

See, in the bogan world there is a place for females in the work environment.

12 10 2010
hel

I need to update my resume.

11 10 2010
Nelson Esq

Irony…sounds like it should be the name for the next can of smelly Lynx spray.

Irony for Men…makes you smell like a REAL MAN!

12 10 2010
AntiPajero

Combine it with some ‘tan-in-a-can’, and you can be irony and bronzy at the same time!! ALL HARDENED UP WITH FULL METAL BODY SPRAYS!

12 10 2010
pb

i think we should call it man-in-a-can.

12 10 2010
hel

but the femme-bogue may mistake it for a new vibrator

12 10 2010
pb

that just increases sales.

12 10 2010
Nelson Esq

With “Irony” for the boys, perhaps there should be ‘Sarcasm’ for the girls.

I can see the ad now…the sweet fragrant femme-bogue has just attracted a muscled up bogue-homme in his best Ed Hardy and she says, “But me a drink and I’ll sleep with you!”

Voice over: “And he’ll believe you”.

11 10 2010
Brimstone

I was in Cootamundra shooting a movie and the bogan pub owner was talking to me so i pretty much made fun of him deadpan. he couldn’t process it

‘it’s like you’re making a joke, but you’re not laughing at it’

it was great

11 10 2010
brad

Asian porn?

11 10 2010
John Vardanega

Given that TBL has itself become quite the stickler for accuracy and correctness in others, it may interest it to note the correct spelling for both ‘The Shepheardes Calender’ and ‘Alanis Morissette’.

Referencing a highbrow literary work in the pursuit of credibility, whilst getting its name not quite right… could that be seen as irony?

Valid points. This entry was only spruced up immediately prior to posting it, and you’ve illustrated the maxtreme risk we took there. TBL

12 10 2010
Edward

Spelling was flexible at the time. Shakespeare is known to have spelled his own name 5 different ways (or perhaps he just had terrible spelling)

12 10 2010
Steve

I think Lawrence Tierney said it best:

Mr. Pink: But why am I “Mr. Pink”?
Joe Cabot: Because you’re a fucking faggot! All right?

12 10 2010
Notorious

I think this musing from Stephen Fry says it all really

12 10 2010
Mick

A review of Stephen Fry by Mick.

I think Stephen needed to roll his eyes more.

12 10 2010
Blueballs

On commenting over the outrage caused by an article written in an American magazine by Dame Edna which mocked the idea of learning the Spanish language “and who are you going to speak the? The gardener?” Barry Humphries referred to his brand of satire “if you have to explain satire, then there isn’t much point”

As for sarcasm being the lowest form of wit, REALLY?

12 10 2010
Wot, Kunt?

“I speak fluent sarcasm ;)” Facebook group that at least one bogue acquaintance of mine joins every other day.

I fricken lurff youse kents, fricken. Youse just *know*.

16 10 2010
chubbybloodfart BBo

…well der!

(hope I got the inflection right)

19 10 2010
Avocat

The Morrissette song ‘Ironic’ is not about irony, which is ironic. This means the song is actually aptly titled…

That song annoys the crap out of me though. “Isn’t it ironic, don’t you think?”
No, it’s just unfortunate. Dumbass.

20 10 2010
Fiona of Toorak, bestower of largesse

LOL. Perhaps you should have read the 100 other posts that had already made this point before adding your own *ahem* thoughts on it?

20 10 2010
Avocat

That’s actually a good point.

Just got a heads-up from TBL, though. Tomorrow’s post:

#185 Wearing their suburbs like knock-off Louis Vuitton

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