The bogan hates following the rules. It believes that it is no respecter of something so pathetic and limiting as the “law” or “reason”. Strangely, though, even though it sees itself as a battle-hardened, street-smart wiseguy/gal, it still wants to see evildoers PAY. But only if it can vicariously wallow in the evil first, then bask in the reflected glory of the good guys pursuing megajustice. All in one hour.
Meanwhile, just as the bogan hates rules and rulebreakers, it loves franchises. When it decides that it likes a Big Mac and thick shake, or Mango Magic smoothie, it wants access to one everywhere. When it decided that it enjoyed watching police chase down bad guys and prosecute them in 43 minutes plus commercials, it wanted the ability to see it on TV at any time of the day. Thus was born Law and Order: SVU. As well as Law and Order: Criminal Intent. And CSI, CSI: New York, and CSI: Maxtreme.
The bogan needs closure. The only kind of open-ended story the bogan will even remotely tolerate is one that effectively promises that the bogan will get a sequel, but this ending will only come after rounding off any and all existing storylines. Nowhere is this more applicable than in police procedurals. Each week, the bogan can expose itself to at least ten sequels to various shows – basically the same show as last week. A person gets killed, police arrive on the scene, then spend the next thirty minutes either discussing cool words like ‘motive’ and ‘opportunity’, or awesome acronyms like ‘MO’, before catching and prosecuting the bad guy. The bogan is not aware that this is an acronym for a Latin phrase. If made aware, it will ignore the inherent intellectualism, and continue rooting for the cops to catch the crims. Meanwhile, in CSI: Maxtreme, the bogan even gets to watch attractive women wear lab suits while putting things into test tubes and beakers, while David Caruso removes and replaces his sunglasses.
Thus, the bogan feels as though everything in the world is in order, and can go home unafraid that it will be assaulted by a paedophile armed burglar. The bogan can sleep soundly, secure in the knowledge that Horatio Crane is out there, protecting bogans and their spawn everywhere.